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Some Inspiration for those trapped in Oxy-hell
  1. #1
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Default Some Inspiration for those trapped in Oxy-hell

    Firstly, I hope my use of the word 'hell' is not considered as cursing. It just the best noun to describe the life you lead when addicted to Oxycontin, and similar pills.

    I waited to post for over a year, because I wanted others to know.....it IS possible to move on with your life after deciding to quit. So many times I read great success stories on here.....and then they go quiet after a few months. I realize there are senior members that have double digit years behind them.....I find the most comfort from their words, as they are living proof this can be done.

    I got back on this forum because I am helping a friend find her life again. She is on Day 6. Although, she is still laying around, and I wish she would move more......I do believe this is due to her not only abusing 3-4 30 mg Oxy (snorting), but also 2-3 Opana 20's.....chewed. Daily for about a year.

    She followed the Thomas Recipe.....but, today is first day of taking the L-Tyrosine, so, this should help. She has been taking the other supplements since day 2. Forget day 1.......she puked all day, which I thought was a little unusual, but everyone is different.

    I might also mention she is not in the best of health, but she did survive and since day 3, their has been improvement daily. Yesterday she actually ate very good. Better than she was while surviving on pills. And her voice is stronger, I know that sounds weird, but she really does sound better.....stronger.

    I'll keep posting her progress.....

    However......quitting is the easy part. I think it is imperative that you begin to plan on how to stay clean, because, there will be cravings. Opportunities to get more pills. That thought that you can handle one. Trust me on this....you can't. If you are here reading these threads, because you are a user.....most likely, you are an addict. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you can move on and start living.

    I took me 3 times to quit for good.

    God bless everyone.

  2. #2
    melindau is offline Member
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    Hi Silver
    What an awsum post..there is nothing better than helping are friends up from the bottem of hell and then watch them help others...Im so glad you came back here...please keep us posted on how your friend is doing and about your story to!!! I know we talked on another thread... but it would be great to tell your story on here to!many blessings to you!!
    Melinda

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    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Thanks, Melinda

    Funny (well, not funny....ironic?) you mentioned your oxy buddy in another post. This is my oxy buddy i'm helping.

    She's doing physically good today.....ate again....but, now the mental is setting in. Once the head clears, you begin to really see what you did. The money you blew through. The relationships you ignored. That's why I think the quitting is easy, but the staying clean is epic!!!!

    Perhaps I will share my story......only my friend I'm helping now knows I was addicted. My younger sister is an addict with severe psychosis....we have not seen her in years. I could not put my mother through the pain of knowing another child was an addict, and I was 54 when I started using. So, I've kept it from everyone, my 2 productive, wonderful sons, whom I raised on my own.....would just freak. I can't let everyone down like that.......and that has given me the courage and determination to stay clean. It works for me.

  4. #4
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Sorry, but I messed up the days.....today is actually Day 6 for my friend. I had to work, but when I got to her she had done dishes, requested more food, as she is hungry now. We talked about when her connection gets back into town in a few days.......I don't want to see her throw all this progress away in the thoughts she can handle 'one'........I reminded her that I fell into that trap 3 times. Each time the passion came back heavier than before. Money is a biggie for her right now, as she blew through over 200,000$......but, he rents a house from her, usually paying in pills.....geez, this is gonna be a struggle for her.

    But, the good thing is.....tomorrow will be one week for her, and she's improving each day now.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 08-22-2014 at 02:47 PM.

  5. #5
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Well, I wrote this post out, then realized I forgot an 'a' before a word, went to edit, and it wouldn't let me save changes and re-post. I should've just left well enough alone, but grammar was very important in my family growing up....lol

    Anyway, I wanted to update anyone following.....I screwed up the days.....today is actually Day 6 for my friend. I had to work and as I was heading to her, she called for food requests, as she is hungry.....yay!!! She also was doing dishes and I could tell had done some household chores. Still weak, but up and functioning.

    Tomorrow will be one week for her!!!!! We did discuss how she would handle her connection coming back into town in a few days. This is going to be very hard for her, as he rents a house from her and pays in pills. But, money is a biggie right now....she's broke. I offered how nice it would be to get real money for a change (no pun intended). I also reminded her that I fell 3 times, thinking I could handle just 'one'......nope. The passion comes back double-fold.

    So we continue going day by day.....I'll keep everyone posted.

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    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Sorry, for the double posts saying same thing. I tried to edit, thought is was unsuccessful and re-wrote. Oy.

  7. #7
    melindau is offline Member
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    hey Silver!!!
    Im so happy your friend has made it a week...but I gotta tell ya the stupid drug dealer makes me made...you know he knows what he is doing!ugh...sorry but I wanna go slap him!!! i hope she makes it and is able to kick him out on his butt...sorry got a sore spot on that! my very own sister was one of my drug dealers and she was mad when I got clean!!! what kind of person does that! (not the one that died!) anyway keep up the wonderful work you are doing!!!
    Melinda

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    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    I'm right there with you, Melinda.....I want to do more than slap him.....but, he used to supply me also, and he has a little girl, and I grew close to her during my days.....see how sick this opiate >>>> is? Some big changes will have to be made, that is for sure. What a mess. But, one day at a time.....I might add how nice it has been to have my best friend back. She is thinking clearer and more like the person I once knew.....God, I hate the pharmacy companies that invented something that steals your life......I might be placing blame in the wrong place, but I am about ready to get a group and fly to Washington and expose all of this. Frustrated......feeling like I'm back at day 6......and watching 'Pearl Harbor".......so need to settle myself....lol.......thanks for checking in.

  9. #9
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    So, my friend is on day 9.......a totally different person.

    Eating.......up and about.....not 100%, but what a difference from the person I saw last week.

    Multiple surgeries at the age of 45 caused copious amounts of percocet. That went to oxycontin and opana.....if she can do it.....anyone can!!!!
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  10. #10
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Okay.....Day 10!!!!!!!!

    She's cooking dinner right now, cause she is hungry.....so, she's up and feeling pretty good. The restless leg thing is bothering her, so I stopped at the health food store and got some Hyland's Leg Cramps pills. I put this on another thread, but want to also put it here, and tomorrow I'll let everyone know if it works.

    It contains a homeopathic quinine, which I have read and been told by many people it helps restless legs. Kinda wish I had known about it last year....lol

    Anyway.....day 10.....no tapering.......off of an average of 90-120 mg of oxycontin and 3 Opana 20's daily.....

    She did follow the Thomas Recipe because I was like a drill sergeant about that...lol

  11. #11
    melindau is offline Member
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    Hey silver
    Im so happy that you have been able to help you friend!your friend is really lucky to have you!!! I so wish I could have helped my old oxy buddy it has been about 6 years now and I seen her a couple months ago and she is in the same hell as before and now he husband is in it with her...breaks my heart!!!
    all we can do is try to pull each other up!!!
    Bless you!!!
    Melinda

  12. #12
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Thanks, Melinda....

    Day 11

    Today after work I came over and she had put on make-up, and was eating when I walked in. She said she is craving everything cause she has been watching so much TV, and all the food ads are appealing to her....lol......she could stand to gain about 30 lbs, though as she is frail.

    Gosh, I'm sorry about your buddy........this past year has broke my heart watching the decline and depths one will go to satisfy that addiction.....especially when you aren't doing it with them...right?

    Maybe one day she will reach out to you, because I'm sure she saw how much better you are now...no?

    I'm just gonna say a little prayer and forget about it, and let God.

  13. #13
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    DAY 12!!!!!!

    Man, she's eating like a pig.....lol. Still having some trouble sleeping, but we all know about that.

    Her connection has been back in town for 2 days......she has no desire to call him. Yet. We'll have to cross that bridge when it comes. Definitely one day at a time.

  14. #14
    melindau is offline Member
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    Hi Silver
    Im so happy that your friend is doing so good!
    about my friend it is kinda sad.. I think she almost hates me at times...I feel sometimes that I deserted her...but it was my time to get out!!! I pray someday she will make it out... but she lives in Washington state and I am now in Texas...when I go there I make it a point to stop and see her... but it's not the same.. so sad...
    your story gives me hope for her tho!!!
    happy day to you...
    Melinda

  15. #15
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    I understand the hate thing......my friend did....but, only because she couldn't break free. Nothing you can do, as you know, until she wants it.....but, one day....she might. And with all the people you have helped and encouraged on here.....well, that would be a nice payback to you.

    I'm not 100% this is IT for her, right now, because, as we discussed before.....'rent' is coming up on the 1st.....and we know that means 'pills'....oh boy.....just dreading the weekend.

    Guess we can only do what we can and leave the rest up to our Creator......but, that's hard sometimes.

    Your son getting better? Sorry to bring it up, if it's a sore subject. Sometimes I need to learn to just shut up.....lol

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    melindau is offline Member
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    Oh Silver never shut up that is what makes us who we are!!! it has been an ongoing thing for some time now.. I have sat back and watched him.. and it was getting out of control... so yes I cornered him and he told me what he was doing! so I ask him what can we do about this and he brought me a broken pipe and said it was done... but as I have watched him the last month I know he is not totally done it is creeping back up!!! I always knew when they were doing something...you know!!! LOL...he lives here with me but is gone on trips a lot so I cant see what he is doing all the time...

  17. #17
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Oh, man......what is it about our kids....hurts worse than if it happens to us. I know it keeps you up at night......I know it never leaves......I think it is only natural we want more for our children. Gonna sound stupid, but my youngest son went through a horrible divorce. I couldn't be there....I know it affected him, so the same goes for addiction to substances......he is addicted to money. I know that sounds like a bad analogy, but it's not......he never has money.....always over spends....and has 3 children....my grandchildren.......I worry constantly.....I worry something will happen and they need cash and the kids will go without......I had to cut him off on the money during my heaviest usage, because, well, you know where my money went......the GUILT is overwhelming.
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  18. #18
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    You know, none of what I just wrote may have made sense. I didn't mean to make light of your son's problem to money......for real, I told you.....sometimes I DO need to shut up.

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    melindau is offline Member
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    Thank's silver you made me Laugh!!! LOL...I wanted to tell ya I think your pretty good at this i have been reading your post's...just saying!!!
    fun to have you here!
    Melinda

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    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Okay.....day 13!!!!! We ordered a pizza tonight and my friend ate over half......I'm gonna starve if this keeps up She is getting better and better.....I posted somewhere else.....she is FEELING again. Good feelings.

    And yes, Melinda......the Irish definitely contributes to a temper....but, usually short-lived, and then you wanna kiss everyone and make up.....lol
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  21. #21
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    I had to report this. My friend, who knows I am documenting her progress wants me to tell everyone that it is very important to exercise even though you don't feel like it. She has been doing stretches with weights, pretty much all day.....on and off. This cracks me up, as last week she was cursing me for being on here.

    I told her it helped me to get through, and now as she is feeling so much better, she tells me what to post.

    Please know, everyone......this is such a turn around.....I am thrilled that my friend is coming back. And to hear her bark out orders to what to post.....well, just amazing.

    Sincerely, people, this woman was killing herself with booze and pills.....her life was in a downward spiral.....and on day 13 she is upbeat, bossy, feeling her old self, and just doing great. Her common sense is returning (always something I admired about her)......I can't put into words what a difference.

    Opiates kill your senses. But, the body and mind DO renew and regenerate.....NEVER give up hope!!!!!

    I am so happy to have her back. I also realize we could go through some rough times, perhaps a relapse.....I hope not, but not gonna let that stop the progress......

    Every step forward is just that......forward.

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    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Day 14.....2 weeks!!!!!!!

    We are gonna watch a movie tonight......and fry up some Johnsonville Grillers......lol.....never had them, but my friend kept seeing the commercials while on the sofa going through w/d's

    What a difference!!!!

  23. #23
    melindau is offline Member
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    Yumm!!! I am a low carb person... so it sounds good to me!!!
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  24. #24
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    lol..........me, too, Melinda.......other than french fries (mcD's.....my guilty pleasure) I can live on meat and veggies
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    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    My gosh! We're now talking about diets and healthy ones at that? I'm chowing down a piece of carrot cake right now. I'm pretty sure it covers most of the food groups!!!!

    Peace,

    Cat
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    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Day 15......just finished up dinner......she's doing great...I'm getting fat!

    She got out today and did some yard work, which she used to a stickler about, but, of course, it's gone by the wayside this past year....but, she's feeling better and better.

    For anyone reading this, and contemplating quitting a habit.......but, thinking you just can't.....I was a little bit afraid because of her health.....she wasn't eating and just so depressed by the habit.....well, she made it through.....and everyday since about day 4 has improved a little.....this past couple of days has been leaps and bounds.

  27. #27
    melindau is offline Member
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    Silver you are the bomb!!! Im so happy!!! it gives me faith in this world!!! There are other people out there that care about others!!! blessed be with you!!!

    Cat... I want a piece of that carrot cake... LOL

    Melinda Love you guys!!!

  28. #28
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Awww, thanks, Melinda......but this forum is full of people that care......I am learning from all you guys that have been around for a while, tirelessly helping others.

    Paying it forward.
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  29. #29
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Day 16. New York strip and spinach salad for dinner.....lol......I know everyone probably thinks......geez, she only talks about food......and 'tis true......but, my friend has not eaten properly for over a year, so it is a big deal to me that she is now enjoying food. She was probably about 98 lbs. when we started 'over' 2 weeks ago....it was scary to me, cause she was skeletal. I bet she has gained a good 5 lbs since.....exercising, housework, thinking about the future.....it's just amazing.
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    Wow silverlining all I can say is I wish I had a friend like you.... You are a amazing person.
    A friend like you is 1 in a million....congrats on day 16 and tell ur friend to start posting
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