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New user! Current Tramadol addict ready for WD to become herself again.
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
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    4

    Red face New user! Current Tramadol addict ready for WD to become herself again.

    Hey everyone,

    I just wanted to start a new thread to introduce myself. My name is Emma and I am a 20 (21 in May) year old Tramadol addict, going on to almost 5 YEARS. Yes, I have been getting high off Tramadol since I was 16 years old, almost 17.

    I am a Biology Allied Health major planning to transfer to UCI School of Nursing in a couple of years.

    I decided today I am DONE living in a fog. I am tired of spending money on Tramadol and being dependent on a pill. As my tolerance has gone up severely over the years, I take more MG than I am comfortable admitting on this forum.

    I have made a list of over-the-counter medications I need to buy. I live with my parents and they will both be out of town next month for a week or so, so I have planned ahead to face my withdrawal demons during this time. Thank goodness, my partner of 3 years will be by my side supporting me.

    So I have withdrawn before, only lasting 2 weeks. I did however quit cold turkey (this was over 3 years ago), and as painful as it was before, I have taken much more medication since then and even a couple of hours without them is painful, I cannot imagine how my withdrawals will be this time so I have decided to use these over-the-counter meds.

    So:

    • Benadryl
    • Nyquil
    • Loperamide (Never used it, have heard mixed reviews on this one).
    • Melatonin
    • Vitamin B6


    I have heard of a few other such as:
    1. L - Tirosine
    2. Dyphenhydramine
    3. Also, someone recommended Valerian Root.


    So, what do you think? Is there something I shouldn't mix? Something I should replace? I look forward to hearing your opinions on the over-the-counter meds as I have never tried any of them before except Nyquil.

    Also, your support on quitting would be very much appreciated. It's the first time in years I have felt so motivated to actually do something about my addiction and I want to believe this is the last time I will ever have to do this again. I really look forward to speaking with other people who have gone/are going through the same thing and support each other through this journey of self-recovery.

    Sincerely,
    Emma
    Catrina and Beefaroni7272 like this.

  2. #2
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Welcome Emma,

    I'm am so happy that you have found the strength to begin the fight to get your life back. You're young so that's in your favor and I would expect that you'll bounce back in grand form.

    One of the issues with Trams is that it's not only a pain reliever but it has and SSRI in it. What happens is that your physical withdrawal should be no worse that a cold turkey detox from a pure opiate. It's the amount of time that it might take you to balance out mentally. Don't under estimate that! You have a few weeks before you begin so I would strongly encourage you to taper down on what you're taking. Take it slow but be diligent. You said you have a partner who is going to support you through this. Can you give him/her control of the pill bottle and give you whatever you've allowed yourself for the day? By the way, there's absolutely no shame in admitting here how much you are taking. This is a non-judgement zone and trust me when I say that whatever you're taking is no more than what many of us have. This is a safe place to let go of secrets because they are poison and will make your journey more difficult. So, let it go right here and maybe down the road you'll find the strength to do it in real life.

    The next thing I might suggest is even though it's scary, you may want to get in to see a doctor and ask for his help. Perhaps he/she can give you an antidepressant right away to help to replace the SSRI component of the Trams and once you put some clean time behind you, you can taper from those. I'm not even sure that this is a wise thing to do but your doctor should.

    The over the counter things you listed are a part of the Thomas Recipe. Google it and print out the complete list. The Recipe does include benzos but stay far away from those unless you're already taking them. Drink as much as you can by constantly sipping on water, fortified water, Gatorade or anything similar. Include a protein rich diet and be sure to eat! Don't stay in bed. Get up and move around. Go for walks, even if they're short. If you go to the gym, that's a wonderful outlet and of tremendous help.

    Welcome to the Forum. Keep posting and be sure to read. Search for threads that address Tram addiction so that you'll have an idea of what you can expect. I'd truly get a doctor on board here.

    Peace,

    Cat

  3. #3
    gomphrena is offline Junior Member
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    Tennessee
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    Ditto everything Cat said. She is the quintessential expert advice-giver and highly regarded around these parts. Although I'm new, I've kibbutzed for months before I was ready to post. Do everything she tells you and you will not go wrong.

    As a retired 30-year RN, the only thing I can add is that you need to understand that you'll be exposed to controlled substances every day when you start your rotations on the floor. You'll be drawing up, administering, counting, documenting, all types of pain meications, anxiolyrics, antidepressants, and they are tightly controlled in the clinical setting.

    I say this because you will need to understand the relationship as a nurse to your patients' needs, as well as your own continued successful recovery. You can do it. But go in with the full awareness of how you got into trouble in the first place.

    Congratulations on your decision to get off the Trams, and I wish you much success in your endeavors.
    Beefaroni7272 likes this.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
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    Hi Catrina,

    Thank you for your welcoming post. I am indeed hoping I will go back quickly to my former self. The happiness and energy I used to feel before ever becoming an addict seems like light years away and the memories of this are in a blur. Addiction makes you believe there was no happiness before the drug. It's insane how our brain actually believes this.

    I know it's going to take at least 1-2 years for my brain to recover and be able to feel the way I used to feel. I remember last time I detoxed I ended up just taking Tramadol again because I was just so bored out of my mind. Activities were useless. Nature, friends, family, nothing felt real anymore. I was a completely different person. I felt like I came back from a long trip on an island or foreign country and my surroundings were so unfamiliar.

    However, now that I am in college and doing things I love, I hope I will have the strength I didn't have before to get through this. Another thing that drove me crazy is insomnia. I didn't take anything at all for it before, but now I know there are things out there that will help me sleep.

    I do plan on tapering down these next few weeks before I completely detox. And yes, my partner is going to stay with me (I hope, but maybe he has to work) while I detox.

    I was thinking of going to a doctor and asking if he can give me anything that will help during my detox, but I am just so scared he/she will think I am just some junkie lying through my teeth to get a fix. I also hate the looks I get when people find out I am a pill addict. I know addiction has no face, but people just don't expect someone so young, going to college and appearing so "normal" to be an addict. This is always hard. It makes me feel insane sometimes. I don't know.

    I have not heard of the Thomas Recipe but I am about to look it up so I can have everything planned out. I don't want to be missing something and have to drive to get it while I am feeling the WD symptoms.

    Thanks so much for your message Cat I really appreciate it. Talking to people on this forum while going through this brings some comfort and encouragement to really go through this.

    Beefaroni7272 likes this.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
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    Hi Gomphrena,

    Thanks for your reply. I appreciate having people to talk to on this forum. Brings some comfort and reassurance that I can do this.

    I especially appreciate you replying being a retired RN. You have no idea how hard it is to go through this struggle knowing my life's work depends on it. This is one of the main reasons I decided to quit. It's not worth putting my career at risk just to get high. I want to finish school and work as a RN and be comfortable working with medication. I admit I am scared. But I know I can get through this and face these medications every day while understanding the boundaries I need to mentally put between myself and them.

    Thank you so much for your reply.
    Beefaroni7272 and gomphrena like this.

  6. #6
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Hey Emma. Welcome to the forum. I see you've already gotten great advice from Cat and gom. I see you've heard mixed reviews about the Imodium (loperimide). I've also read the horror stories about this. Most of them are because they were taking rediculous amounts daily during their detox (20-30 pills/day). Try not to worry about those. Liquid form works best, take it as directed and it will be a life saver. One dose would last me 2-3 days. It is technically an opiate, but it does not cross the blood brain barrier. Just take it as needed and you'll be fine. It will help so much when you jump!!

    Just wanted to poke my head in and say welcome and congratulations on Taking your life back!!

    Have a great day!!
    Beef
    Last edited by Anonymous; 03-26-2018 at 12:19 PM.
    thefigurehead likes this.

  7. #7
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    Mar 2018
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beefaroni7272 View Post
    Hey Emma. Welcome to the forum. I see you've already gotten great advice from Cat and gom. I see you've heard mixed reviews about the Imodium (loperimide). I've also read the horror stories about this. Most of them are because they were taking rediculous amounts daily during their detox (20-30 pills/day). Try not to worry about those. Liquid form works best, take it as directed and it will be a life saver. One dose would last me 2-3 days. It is technically an opiate, but it does not cross the blood brain barrier. Just take it as needed and you'll be fine. It will help so much when you jump!!

    Just wanted to poke my head in and say welcome and congratulations on Taking your life back!!

    Have a great day!!
    Beef
    Hi Beef!

    I figured they were taking huge amounts of the medication and that's why they OD. In what way did it help exactly? Did it give you energy?
    Beefaroni7272 likes this.

  8. #8
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Soothes all stomach issues and without going into too much detail, made for much much less frequent bathroom trips. Whenever I had issues I'd take a swig from the bottle and be good for a couple of days. Never gave me energy, But did make me feel better.

  9. #9
    Methadone insomnia is offline Junior Member
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    I agree doing a slow taper, cutting back small amounts each week starting now will make your Jump off the medication night and day difference .. You got this! Stay strong and get the amount your using now lower..break the pills into halfs and quarters.. Or take 1 or 2 less a day there is many ways to taper..then in a week do another small drop..just don't taper to much to fast or it gets really painful..you can do it!

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