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Whats happening?
  1. #1
    Loyalty is offline New Member
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    Default Whats happening?

    Okay so I've made post here before and I told my story of being on Oxy for 2.5 years.
    I'm still on them BUT up until about 4 days ago something that I want to say is a blessing but want to make sure it isn't no medical issue at hand. I take on average around 50mg daily. Sometimes I jump up between 75-90 sometimes I fall as low as 30mg. But I recently got my tolerance down and one day out of nowhere, I took my daily dose and was waiting for it to kick in. It never really kicked in. So I took more and just ended up really sleepy and went to sleep. So I was thinking OK these are fake, so I go the next day and get some that I knew were real. Same thing. I'm not getting high. I literally just get sleepy now and honestly I feel like I'm breaking up with my best friend, but I'm okay with that. Like its really crazy to me because I'm not getting high, like its not giving me that feeling I always look for and have had for 2.5 years and suddenly?? Like now I'm just like OK this is pointless.. Has anybody experienced this. It's not that my tolerance has shot up, trust me I've been on them long enough to know the difference. It's not giving me that feeling I'm always chasing.?!? I want to be joyful, but it's kind of scary but God is very real! Understand this! I asked Him to take the taste out of my mouth the other day and now this. Any input is welcomed
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  2. #2
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Loyalty View Post
    Okay so I've made post here before and I told my story of being on Oxy for 2.5 years.
    I'm still on them BUT up until about 4 days ago something that I want to say is a blessing but want to make sure it isn't no medical issue at hand. I take on average around 50mg daily. Sometimes I jump up between 75-90 sometimes I fall as low as 30mg. But I recently got my tolerance down and one day out of nowhere, I took my daily dose and was waiting for it to kick in. It never really kicked in. So I took more and just ended up really sleepy and went to sleep. So I was thinking OK these are fake, so I go the next day and get some that I knew were real. Same thing. I'm not getting high. I literally just get sleepy now and honestly I feel like I'm breaking up with my best friend, but I'm okay with that. Like its really crazy to me because I'm not getting high, like its not giving me that feeling I always look for and have had for 2.5 years and suddenly?? Like now I'm just like OK this is pointless.. Has anybody experienced this. It's not that my tolerance has shot up, trust me I've been on them long enough to know the difference. It's not giving me that feeling I'm always chasing.?!? I want to be joyful, but it's kind of scary but God is very real! Understand this! I asked Him to take the taste out of my mouth the other day and now this. Any input is welcomed
    Yes that's what happens eventually. It's but one of the reasons why we do increase the amount we take hoping that one more will give us the high that we're chasing., Save yourself the time and money chasing it because once this happens, it won't ever be the same. I abused pain pills for the better part of twenty years and it was many, MANY years that no matter how many I took it wasn't the same. Countless relapses later, I can tell you that after some clean time you will feel them more than you do now but it will never be the same and it's short lived anyway. After only a couple of days you'll stop feeling them again and you'll be faced with the same predicament as you do now. Don't test that theory because it's not worth it. Just trust me on that.

    Now's the time to stop. Just stop! Your daily usage isn't absurdly high so catch it now before it does get way out of hand because it will. It always does. Either you will begin to take more to chase the high or you'll look for something stronger. It's the nature of the beast. If you stop cold turkey now, you will likely experience some withdrawal symptoms that include bathroom issues, achy muscles, restless legs, and insomnia. The aches and restless legs will last around 5 days and then stop quite abruptly. The bathroom issues and insomnia will hang around for a while longer,. Those are the physical symptoms. The mental issues will include cravings and some anxiety and those are so closely related that it's hard to know where one ends and the other begins. Just know that these final physical issues will resolve gradually over the course of the next few weeks. Depending upon where your head is with all of this, the anxiety and cravings will come and go for a while too but with each day clean, the closer you will get to having more frequent days with fewer issues mentally and emotionally.

    Read around this Forum and you'll find a ton of inspiration and a million reasons why you should begin your cold turkey detox right now. It's less than one week out of your life that you'll feel pretty poopy in exchange for getting your life back. In exchange for your self esteem. It's a good trade so go for it.

    Continue to read and post here. I can't begin to tell you how much it helps.

    Peace,

    Cat

  3. #3
    Anonymous Guest

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    Loyalty - there is no one who speaks the truth or knows the truth more than Cat. She is spot on on how the events all fall into a predictable action. I call it the rinse and repeat effect. It's one of the hardest things, I believe, one can achieve. I am a believer to never quit quitting. Keep on with it. No matter what. We are human. We are always going to have something going on in our lives. Always. Try everything you can think of ways to overcome this, whether it is working out, clean house, working, gardening, riding your bike, etc. Do this in small increments. Start with concentrating on cleaning out one drawer, walking to the end of the driveway. What I have observed on here, the last three years, is that the people who succeed, either 1) have a strong sense of wanting to quit; and 2) exercise. Consider this a accomplishment because it is. One day, I must believe that we will sing we have survived because we all can relate to this awful little mascaraed we have been accustomed to. Lvg. says something to live by: Nothing changes, if nothing changes. If you can gather yourself and make this true, that is HALF the battle.

    Hope
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  4. #4
    Leah987 is offline Senior Member
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    Loyalty.....I'm with Hope.^^^^ Listen to Cat. She is our guru, our therapist, and sometimes our mom. (Even tho her "kids" are probably older than she is! ) She DOES know her stuff. The hard part will be over soon....and yes, God will be there for you thru it all! I quit ultram, somas, and hydros a year ago. If I can do this, you can do this!
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  5. #5
    Leah987 is offline Senior Member
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    It will be much harder later!

  6. #6
    ForMe30 is offline Member
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    It is a blessing. This is your way out....take it!!
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  7. #7
    zebra1961 is offline Member
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    loyalty Take Cats advice and wisdom they are spot on. as far as the real good feeling, after so long you wont get it again it last so long and then its just a dull weak reminder of past days. I was on drugs about 10 years worst time of my life. So if your ready to quit do it now!!! You are right it is pointless only a huge drag on your life, health, relationships, and your happiness. Don't keep hanging on it will not return ( the feeling good ) The way to return to joy is God and quitting, clean 2 yrs now this is wayyyy better don't look back. Hope this helps and if I quit anyone can you got this God will get you thru. I don't know what kind of pain condition you have but there is alternatives,and in my case the pain killers where causing way more pain than when I started on them ( crazy huh!!! ) It will work out best of luck.

  8. #8
    DDAVE45 is offline Member
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    Well said cat

  9. #9
    Loyalty is offline New Member
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    I appreciate all of you're responses. Thank you cat for the advice! Unfortunately I didn't stop at the time of this post and actually went higher with my dosage. I jumped up to 80-115mg a day for about 2-3 weeks. Recently did my own unorganized taper and last Tuesday I took 60mg.
    After that I stuck to 30mg opana for 3 days and took 20mg yesterday.
    Today I took 20mg hydrocodone. And I plan on jumping tomorrow. I apologize for making multiple threads I'm a try to stick to this one. Sometimes i just have different questions. About my taper, yall dont think ima feel like im jumping off 100mg? I tried to drop it, the first day I had mild withdrawal symptoms after taking 30mg opana and waiting 24 hours. I just went 27 hours before I took this 20mg hydro and all I had was anxiety. I have adderall which is a gift and a curse because it kills my cravings but increases my anxiety and immodium and some L-ty something. Any advice asap will be appreciated

  10. #10
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Loyalty View Post
    I appreciate all of you're responses. Thank you cat for the advice! Unfortunately I didn't stop at the time of this post and actually went higher with my dosage. I jumped up to 80-115mg a day for about 2-3 weeks. Recently did my own unorganized taper and last Tuesday I took 60mg.
    After that I stuck to 30mg opana for 3 days and took 20mg yesterday.
    Today I took 20mg hydrocodone. And I plan on jumping tomorrow. I apologize for making multiple threads I'm a try to stick to this one. Sometimes i just have different questions. About my taper, yall dont think ima feel like im jumping off 100mg? I tried to drop it, the first day I had mild withdrawal symptoms after taking 30mg opana and waiting 24 hours. I just went 27 hours before I took this 20mg hydro and all I had was anxiety. I have adderall which is a gift and a curse because it kills my cravings but increases my anxiety and immodium and some L-ty something. Any advice asap will be appreciated
    Loyalty -

    You can ask all your questions on this thread. That way all your info is contained in one place. It makes things much easier so the members can just look back a page or two and find info that is pertinent. Different questions doesn't require additional threads. More than one thread can get extremely confusing.

    Anyway, I would just make the jump and not look back. Tapering a full agonist opiate is ok, if you can do it. It takes a lot of determination and willpower. Reason being is you have the pills there if things get a bit dicey. It's way too easy to take more that your taper dose and before you know it you're taking more than you had planned. And you're basically in wd's the entire time you're tapering. If you're going to have wd symptoms why not have them while counting clean days?

    I would NOT take the Adderall. Way too addictive and you don't want a problem with those I assure you. Why take something addictive to get off addictive substances? Doesn't make sense. The Imodium is fine, but take the minimal amount. I assume you're speaking of L-Tyrosine and it's fine and can provide a little energy in some cases. But it has been known to make some people jittery like too much caffeine can do so take very little until you know how it affects you.

    Try the Thomas Recipe minus the benzo's it suggests. Again, way too addicting unless your doctor has you on them already for a period of time. A benzo detox is many time worse than any opiate detox I promise you.

    Don't sit around the house watching the clocks. Get up and get out as the time will pass much, much faster. Get as much exercise (walking is great) as you can. Eat and drink some protein for energy. And make certain to drink lots of fluids, especially water. Gatorade is ok, and so is Pedialyte, Boost, etc. Check with your doctor first is good advice.

    And make an appt with your doctor for a check up including labs if you haven't had one in a while. I highly recommend everyone does that when coming off opiates to rule out any potential problems.

    You have to really want this Loyalty. You really do to be successful.

    Randy
    Beefaroni7272 likes this.

  11. #11
    Loyalty is offline New Member
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    I appreciate your response randy! Soooo I uhmmmm went a crazy route. But I had a weird experience. I'm a be honest, I took the adderall and I still felt like >>>> at around 27 hours in (while I was on Adderall) and just sat it out for a lil while and took some Imodium. I got to 36 hours and I couldn't go to sleep but I didn't really feel any withdrawal symptoms. A lil skin crawling. But here I am at 45 hours and honestly I don't feel bad. I haven't been to sleep. I tried and I got tired of the RLS so I just said I'm a stay up.. I can't wait until I get to the 72 hour mark.. Let alone 90. I'm done with them. I jumped off before and got right back into it after 2 months. (When I got around them) so I've been on them for the last 13 months and That was just dreadful. I learned this time and I dished out SOOO much money I cant keep going like this. I don't wanna feel trapped like that anymore..
    But back to my original question on my other post, is there any supplements or anything I can take to get my stamina back up sexually? I have something coming up and I absolutely do NOT want to go 10 seconds and disappoint? ANY advice on that will be helpful!?

  12. #12
    Loyalty is offline New Member
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    Ok so I'm on day 4. Withdrawals are gon ect ect but I'm having this feeling of being lost! Not really knowing whats going on, I'm trying to adapt. I've made huge steps and told most of my main connects that I don't use anymore. I'm not home but I have to go back soon and tbh I'm scared! I'm trying my BEST to remember all the pain I went thru being addicted. Literally cried one day cus I just felt hopeless lol but its very easy to forget that pain and remember the high! The false security it provides! I'm all over the place in my thoughts. Please ANY advice would be appreciated??

  13. #13
    Comeback Kid is offline Senior Member
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    Hey loyalty. Hang in there. Day 4 is great! Keep it up. I'm going to be honest and tell you those feelings will be common early on. It's what you do with that thinking that keeps you in line. Don't forget all the bad times.

    One piece of advice. Change your phone number. I quit a couple times and each relapse was because my connect texted me not me texting him. Changing my phone number was one of my greatest tools.

    Good luck.
    Beefaroni7272 and Catrina like this.

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