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Oxycontin Withdrawal
  1. #1
    appletoid is offline Banned
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    Default Oxycontin Withdrawal

    I am in my VERY early 40’s and have been a user of opiates for over 20 years. This has not been continuous as there has been many years of opiate abstinence in between short periods of active addiction.

    Needless to say I have done countless withdrawals some have been easy and others have been very hard. I am currently on Day 4 of total drug & opiate detox and it has been 6 days since I took any oxycontin.

    During the long periods that I have been awake this week I have read lots of stories on boards such as these and found them very helpful, so this is my attempt to return some of that help.

    This last year has been particularly difficult, as my wife has become very ill which forced me to give up work to look after her and our children. Her illness has meant she has had to take strong painkillers. I have been fearful of opiates since I first managed to get off >>>>>> & then methadone in my early 20’s. However as with all addicts that has not stopped me from trying opiates again later on in my life, all be it with great care. I would say that I have used cannabis all my adult life.

    So when a supply of strong painkillers became available to my wife it was not long before I started to take them as well. The painkiller my wife was given is Codeine Phosphate, certainly not the strongest but strong enough for me, a recovering addict to pick up the habit again very quickly. They quickly stopped having any effect on me other than me having to take them every 2-3 hours to avoid the withdrawal symptoms. I decided to stop taking them and it took me 8 days to fully get over the withdrawal. I did use a short acting benzo to assist me with this w/d and as hard as it was I did find that I could manage it. I vaped cannabis continuously I might add.

    A month or so later, as the cannabis was not really giving me the desired effects I craved and the last withdrawal did not seem too bad in my memory I thought it would be a good idea to try a stronger opiate. So I used >>>>>> continuously for 2 weeks. After any relapse the first sensations of trying opiates is like getting a warm hug off a great friend. I always forget that this friend always holds a knife behind his back. After a week I am back to where I was at the height of my last >>>>>> addiction, some 20 years ago. Active addiction is not much fun especially when you have others who are entirely reliant on you so I quickly decide that I will stop using and with the help of the same benzo (not valium) I used last time. >>>>>> w/d is always hard but at least when you are throwing benzo’s down your throat and vaping weed all day long I found it was manageable. This w/d took around 5 days to get back to normal.

    About a month later my wife was prescribed oxycontin after surgery. It was not an opiate I was too familiar with and again my rationale for taking this painkiller was that my last two recent w/d were quite easy and that I had not tried oxycontin before. I have to say I really enjoyed the 1st oxy experience. So much so that I decided to buy some off the black market (my wife really needed hers at the time so I could not deprive her of all her meds!)

    I have been using oxy for two months and soon the oxy high was not lasting that long. I had to take 20mg of oxy every 3-4 hours I decided enough was enough. Those things are expensive!!

    I thought I would place one last order that should have arrived via post on Monday morning. My supplies had run out on the Sunday, so you can imagine how pissed off I am when nothing arrives. My wife is no longer prescribed them and all I can take is codeine for the w/d. They do absolutely nothing despite taking quite a few throughout the day. I was optimistic that my package of oxy would arrive on Tuesday so I can hold out until then. By Tuesday I am in a complete mess and again nothing arrives. It is at this point I decide to go through the w/d and try to stay off these things for good. I contacted the oxy supplier and cancelled the order (he had not even bloody sent it despite me ordering them over a week ago!!).

    I took a few codeine tablets on Tuesday but again they do nothing to take the w/d away. As of Wednesday I went completely drug free, no opiates, no benzo’z, no weed. It’s been a complete nightmare so much so that I had to confess to my wife what I had been doing. It is I who is supposed to be looking after her not the other way round.

    It is now Saturday morning and the w/d is just starting to ease although I have still not been able to sleep more than 2 hours a night I do feel a lot brighter, and my dexterity is returning, hence the reason for this long and rambling account of recent events.

    This w/d experience has been very different to the others I have done this year, whether that is because of the oxy or the fact that I have not used lots of other drugs to ease the pain of w/d I’m not sure. I do know that this deeply uncomfortable experience will not be forgotten quite as easily. I am hoping that I can remember this before I put any other type of opiate into my body again. I even made a video diary yesterday for me to play to myself should I think about using again. This is not something I have ever done before so let’s see if it works.

    Having read lots of posts of people using valium and other benzo’s to come off opiate’s I can confirm that they will help you and ease the experience. The problem is that if you are an addict you may then find it difficult to stop using them to. I once took valium for 4 months and stopped suddenly only to experience an awful w/d that lasted 3 months. I can safely say I will never put another valium into my body.

    Some things I found very helpful during this experience was making myself as comfortable as possible by taking long hot baths and then just wrapping myself up warm under lots of duvets.

    Immodium is absolutely essential and yes paracetamol (acetaminophen) really does help to relieve those sudden bursts of pain that you experience in w/d. It has also been essential to have the full support of my partner who was able to hide and flush all painkillers away should my will power fail at the last hour. A mantra that I have kept on repeating especially yesterday is “the night is always darkest just before the dawn” and how true that is.

    Another useful mantra I kept on repeating is “as unpleasant as this experience is, it is only for a week and it will not kill me”.

    I will finish with this. Humans are instinctive creatures who will often return to things that give us pleasure. That said we will also stay away from things that cause us discomfort and pain. If your goal is to stay off opiates for the rest of your life then maybe the withdrawal experience needs to be something that you will not easily forget and should never be something that you find easy. Yes you can anaesthetize yourself with various non opiate drugs so you don’t feel a thing during your w/d but in my experience this has only led to short term abstinence. I am praying this time my addict brain will not so easily be persuaded to take opiates again.

    Anyway almost at the end of day 4 & I will not use today. As soon as I am able to leave the house I intend to attend a local NA or AA meeting on a regular basis. Otherwise my chances of staying of drugs will be virtually 0.

    Thank you to all the people who post their stories on these boards I can not tell you how helpful they are on those long hard days & longer nights!

  2. #2
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Hey, Apple...

    Thank you for your very honest post. How awakening it must have been, that you took your wife's pain killers, that she needed. I applaud your honesty.

    Last year, I visited my mother, who has an incurable cancer, and I actually thought about looking through her medicine chest to see if she had any oxy. That was so sick of me, and shamed me beyond belief.

    Keep us updated as to your progress, Apple.....we all learn from each other. And good luck on your continued success.

    Thanks!

  3. #3
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Sorry, but, also I noted you did not continue taking her meds. I know you ordered your own.....just didn't want you to think I misunderstood,

  4. #4
    appletoid is offline Banned
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    Hi Silverlining1,

    No offence taken, the truth will apparently set me free!!

    Day 5 - I managed to get 6 hours sleep last night!!! Woke up completely soaked but felt a little better again. Managed to take my eldest boy to his rugby game this morning, its getting cold now in the UK and the wind felt like it was ripping me apart. I found it really hard trying to act normal in front of the other parents but I did it and am back home now nice & warm.

    Can't wait for tmr where I will hopefully be feeling almost human again.

    Take care!

  5. #5
    appletoid is offline Banned
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    Day 6 - last night was quite hard, was very irritable and restless. Managed to get some very light sleep and have awoken today feeling pretty much the same as yesterday. Was hoping for an improvement to be honest. I can feel my mood descend towards the inevitable low that I know is coming. I was going to go to the Drs and discuss going on a mild antidepressant but instead I decided to buy some St Johns Wort. Feeling a bit better after taking it too!!

    Surely not long now before I can feel more relaxed, this Oxy w/d is a tough one for sure.
    WantToBeFree72 likes this.

  6. #6
    appletoid is offline Banned
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    Day 8 - starting to feel the w/d symptoms subside now which is a huge relief. Getting more sleep at night, all be it light with constant night sweats!!

    Have been taking St Johns Wort since Monday, and can not feel any benefit from that at this time. My mood is very low and I have no motivation to do anything. I am hoping that it works like other SSRI's that make you feel worse for a week and then suddenly kick in. If things change for the better I will post on here.
    WantToBeFree72 likes this.

  7. #7
    appletoid is offline Banned
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    Day 10 - I stopped taking the St John Wort yesterday as it was making me feel worse. Still feeling very low but I was expecting this I just hope it passes quickly. Forced myself to go for a 5 mile run this afternoon and the exercise has really helped. Feel much brighter and more positive about life than I did before the run.

    The thought of taking another oxy make me feel really ill, I hope this lasts!!

  8. #8
    appletoid is offline Banned
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    Day 13 - decent nights sleep, no night sweats and have awoken today feeling like the sun is starting to shine again!! The last two weeks have been hell for me and everyone around me. I don't want to go through this again.

    Good luck to anyone who reads these posts!

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