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2 Weeks Clean Today! Need support and advice :)
  1. #1
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    Default 2 Weeks Clean Today! Need support and advice :)

    Hi everyone! I'm back. I'm not sure what happened to my original thread but I believe it was deleted. So it's been two full weeks that I've been off of suboxone and opiates and I'm feeling pretty good about it. Tonight is my celebrate recovery meeting and I've been looking forward to it all week long. I have a dilemma. My cousin, who has had back surgery and on tramadol, calls me that she ran out of her meds and wants to know if I can get some for her. I said I would try bc I hate to see her sick and now she is counting on me. I feel like a total junkie right now bc I've been calling all day trying to find her something bc she's been blowing up my phone. I realize that she has her own issues she needs to work out but I have been there done that and I hate to see her in pain or sick. Do I risk my sobriety to help out my family? Am I even helping or just prolonging the inevitable? I know what I need to do is go to my meeting and forget about it but I know as soon as I go to the meeting my connect will call me that he has what she wants. If I don't go to the meeting he will probably not even call. So what do I do???

  2. #2
    The Husband is offline Member
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    Seems like your between a rock and a hard place... I wouldn't even play with the idea of making the call that seems like a terrible idea.

    I would just explain that you are two weeks clean and don't want to risk a relapse, remember its not your fault she ran out of meds and you could potentailly get her addicted or dependent on an opiate should wouldn't have otherwise.

    God bless
    Catrina and 1day-at-a-time like this.

  3. #3
    Peechuween is offline New Member
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    First of all Congrat's! I am here trying to find ways to work thru detox pain from Norco. It is day one and this SUX!!!! Okay...back to you! Do not give your cousine any meds....the act of calling t"he connect"...as this is NO longer "your connect"....right? Two weeks sober reminder here.... ehum! So....by contacting "someone" like that is first ILLEGAL and you do not want to be someone's biatch in jail. The act of being the middle man must stop. You are in lifetime recovery. I have a multitude of painful disabilities and went cold turky. It so happens I did not take the Norco on time today and the pain was HORRIBLE!! This site clued me into hot water soaking to help ease the pain. It has helped some thank God!

    By telling your cousin that you are sick and are rehabilitating will personalize the not getting them any more meds. Expect them to either understand (YAY!) or be pissed (hissss booooo!) Either way stay true to you. This isn't my first rodeo...I have a brother who constantly hits me up. That too has stopped on my end. Hope these words of encouragement help. Time to put down the phone....fibromyalgia is rearing its ugly head!
    Catrina and 1day-at-a-time like this.

  4. #4
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Congrats 1day!!!!!

    I've got some clean time under my belt after countless attempts. My son has been a long term addict and is newly in recovery. He lives with me and I've seen him dope sick plenty of times. Oh, I still know people where I can get something if I wanted to and I have to admit watching my son suffer had me walking a tightrope more than once. Please don't "help" anyone except yourself on your road to your continued recovery. My son, yes the addict, during one of his clean periods told me that when folks were still calling him because they were sick, someone told him to "Just do you". I share that with you now. These addicts know that we know and understand exactly the misery they are in and know that we will help them. It has to stop! The first time I said no, it was uncomfortable and I felt incredibly selfish. The more I said no, the easier it became and this was my son living in my house. I couldn't hang the phone up or just not answer it. In retrospect, I wonder how I survived.

    "Just do you!!"

    Peace,

    Cat
    Last edited by Anonymous; 10-09-2014 at 09:34 PM.
    1day-at-a-time likes this.

  5. #5
    Peechuween is offline New Member
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    Thank you Cat. You are correct. I am just doing...the "JUST DO YOU"..and am glad. No one seems to care except others going thru it. Thanx.
    1day-at-a-time likes this.

  6. #6
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    Wow, you are all so right! I knew the right thing to do but sometimes it helps to hear from others who have been there as well.

    I went to my meeting last night and received my blue chip for being there for 2 weeks now! I am so glad that I did. Today is 15 days clean for me now! It really feels like so much longer and like the time kind of drags by bc I've been pretty messed up for years. But as I so often have to remind myself, I'm taking it one day at a time.

    Regarding my cousin, she has been in rehab before for stronger opiates so I know she definitely has a problem. My other cousin (her brother) also goes to CR and meetings for his addiction to opiates. We have all experienced the pain and suffering that comes with withdrawal when you're taking a lot of opiates whether it be tramadol or OC. So my cousin is coming over to my house today, so I'm going to ask her if she would like to see my previous doctor for sub meds. Maybe this can help her with her pain and withdrawal? I realize and am putting all the focus on my own recovery and hope that I may encourage others by my own example of abstinence.

    I have some accountability partners now and I am feeling so great to be free of those little devil pills and slave drugs and if I do get tempted I play the tape all the way to the end and just know that I don't want to be sick. Not only that, but I don't need drugs to make me feel good anymore! Thank you Jesus for saving my life. I have been so close to death so many times and I know He has more planned for me than that. I have a family to take care of. I believe that God was just building my testimony.

    Each and every day I feel stronger and stronger, and my mind is clearer and clearer. I owe it all to God.

    Thank you all for the kind words and I hope to hear back soon!

    I will continue to update my story....

    Taking it one day at a time.....
    silverlining1 and Iluv2smile like this.

  7. #7
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    Hi there!
    Congratulation!
    You are doing great!

    Can I ask did you taper the sub and it that what you are 15 days clean from ?
    Thank you so much for sharing your experience strength and hope!
    It gives me hope!
    Take care
    Iluv2
    1day-at-a-time likes this.

  8. #8
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    Hello everyone. On Friday 10/10/14 after being clean from opiates and subs for 15 days I made a very poor decision and relapsed on opiates Friday night. I really didn't even want to do it but part of me told myself I could do it just this "once". I am paying for it like hell now and I feel like such an idiot.

    Friday I took the opiates and got pretty messed up. I really didn't even enjoy it and ended up falling asleep. Saturday I was pretty much still out of it from all the stuff I did Friday night. I took one 8 mg sub though Saturday morning to try to help with the withdrawal. I didn't start feeling sick again until Saturday night and I have been literally sleeping since last night around 11 pm. I woke up this morning (Sunday) and everything hurts. My back, shoulders, and neck are just stiff and ache. I took another 8 mg sub around noon today and it's not helping that much. I feel like I have a major hangover and I just want to sleep. I definitely don't want to go through this again. Idk how long this will take to feel better this time but I definitely feel like I learned my lesson this time. I guess I will go take a hot shower and try to feel better. I only have one 8 mg sub left so idk what to do with it. I'm going to try and save it and only use it if really desperate.

  9. #9
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
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    Hey, 1day.....

    I think most of us have relapsed....took me 3 times, so don't beat yourself up.

    I'm more concerned about the amount of sub you are taking.....that's a huge amount.....hopefully one of the sub people will come on and give some advice.....try not to take anymore until then.

  10. #10
    Iwantoff2013 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by 1day-at-a-time View Post
    Hello everyone. On Friday 10/10/14 after being clean from opiates and subs for 15 days I made a very poor decision and relapsed on opiates Friday night. I really didn't even want to do it but part of me told myself I could do it just this "once". I am paying for it like hell now and I feel like such an idiot.

    Friday I took the opiates and got pretty messed up. I really didn't even enjoy it and ended up falling asleep. Saturday I was pretty much still out of it from all the stuff I did Friday night. I took one 8 mg sub though Saturday morning to try to help with the withdrawal. I didn't start feeling sick again until Saturday night and I have been literally sleeping since last night around 11 pm. I woke up this morning (Sunday) and everything hurts. My back, shoulders, and neck are just stiff and ache. I took another 8 mg sub around noon today and it's not helping that much. I feel like I have a major hangover and I just want to sleep. I definitely don't want to go through this again. Idk how long this will take to feel better this time but I definitely feel like I learned my lesson this time. I guess I will go take a hot shower and try to feel better. I only have one 8 mg sub left so idk what to do with it. I'm going to try and save it and only use it if really desperate.
    Hi there. This is just my opinion, but I really think you should ditch the Sub. After 15 days clean with a little relapse, you don't wanna start up an unnecessary taper. Why did you take so much Sub??

    I think if you ride it out, you'll be fine. There may be some discomfort, but nothing like a cold turkey detox.

    Hope this helps. Get to one meeting every day! All the best to you.
    Kat
    1day-at-a-time likes this.

  11. #11
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    Hello again, and I'm feeling so much better.

    So right after my earlier post I jumped in a hot shower and felt so great while I was in there. It took all my pain away. I got out of the shower to a freezing cold house which also felt good at the time. I was able to get dressed and lay back down and then the migraine headache kicked in. I forced myself to get up and take some Tylenol extra strength to try to get rid of the headache and try to lay back down. Well that was when the withdrawal hit me full force and I ran to the bathroom and projectile vomited everywhere. It was like no other experience I have ever had. While I was vomiting every single muscle in my body was in extreme pain from my head all the way down my legs. I'm just glad that's over now. After I got that out of my system, I basically just sat down and rested my head back and was able to sleep for about an hour. I took 1 mg of Ativan which is prescribed to me and that helped me sleep.

    Regarding the opiates and sub use (I should say abuse) it's something I've been struggling with for the past 8 years. It started out as a weekend thing with my bf and I never thought I would get addicted. The addiction slowly crept it's way into my life to where I was taking the opiates every day and to the point where I would take them to not be sick and to just feel "normal".

    For the past 3 years I've been on subs. When I was pregnant, I was under the supervision of a doctor, on subutex only, and tapered down. I tapered all the way down to 2 mg and eventually stopped taking them all together. After I had the baby I started getting really bad anxiety and my sub doctor put me back on the subs bc "it helped my anxiety".

    I started out on 16 mg a day subs. I realized that I could get high when I wanted to bc I could always go to my doc and get subs and have no withdrawal. I feel that the subs just became a crutch in my life and realized that if I want to really get better I need to be off of the subs too. Based on my own personal experience, I believe that subs can be used for very short periods of time and be effective in not experiencing withdrawal. But if subs are used over a long period of time they are just as bad as the opiates themselves.

    I didn't taper myself down at all. I had been using opiates for a few days, then I would take subs for a few days, then I wouldn't take anything at all for a couple days, then start the vicious cycle all over again. Well enough is enough and I don't want this lifestyle anymore! Right before my clean time I had used opiates for 2-3 days and then took subs for 3 days. The first day I took 16 mg of subs and the next two days I took 8mg each day then jumped off. I was able to make the jump and not really experience too many bad withdrawals. Before that I was on 8 mg a day of subs and would occasionally take the opiates.

    So thank you all for the support as always! I know I'm so ready to be over this bs in my life, I have so much more to live for!

  12. #12
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    So it's 2 pm here and it's been 26 hours since I took the 8 mg sub. I'm feeling much better than I was yesterday and don't plan on taking anymore subs or opiates. I am still pretty tired and don't feel like doing much other than laying around all day. I feel like the worse part is already over for me and I need to refocus on being clean and teaching myself new coping skills. I didn't make it to church yesterday bc I was too sick but I will be at my CR meeting this Thursday. I wish I knew of more meetings, I would definitely like to go more than just once a week but I need child care and I don't know that the meetings all have care except for the ones at churches.

    One day at a time.

  13. #13
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    Congrats on two weeks! I'm at exactly 3 weeks today and am feeling so much better. So to answer your question from a point of view similar to you as far as recovery times go. I would say absolutely do not call anyone. It sucks for her and you'll feel bad but if she's in that much pain she needs to go to the ER and have them adjust her meds, make her comfortable and she needs to work on her own issues. That's what I'd do right now being only 3 weeks out, its just too soon!

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