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Advice on how to talk to my Dr. about tapering Oxycodone.
  1. #31
    Stell76 is offline Junior Member
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    Just adding my two cents worth...your choices have been put very succinctly...
    Its up to you what you decide but I will be here for you too
    As I said I have the same choices to make as you
    And feel the same tug of war...
    As Bette said...its not you're fault or choice so dont keep blaming youreself
    Hard I know...you must always do these things for you...but in your case you do have kids to think about too
    Think how proud you will be
    Love Stell

  2. #32
    jarl is offline Junior Member
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    Good morning...

    Yesterday the depression was horrific. I haven't even quit yet and already I'm panicking. This is not right. Is there a chance my Zoloft has stopped working? (50mg) I've just haven't felt so mentally awful in about 12 years. (Son was just hurt)
    Please tell me I'm okay...

    Angie

  3. #33
    Stell76 is offline Junior Member
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    Of course you are OK...its so normal to feel like that when you are on this treadmill...you are going to long without contacting us ...please please please post more try to log in a few times a day at least...
    What do you mean you hurt you're son ?
    Of course you are anxious and depressed I understand totally and really feel for you...if you want to talk to me please feel free to do so I will just listen...and not judge
    How are you going with your tabs ? are you out yet ?
    I wish I could help you more but its hard for me to know where your head is at
    All I can tell you is that your mind has not been able to make a final discussion so you are depressed and anxious and prolly in WD to a certain extent...please believe me that if you were so very bad yesterday then tomorrow will more than likely be much better

  4. #34
    Stell76 is offline Junior Member
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    No I doubt zoloft has stopped working but it might not hurt tonight to up the dose by a fraction like a 1/4 of a tab something like that....if you are not sleeping that can make it worse in all things

  5. #35
    jarl is offline Junior Member
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    No no...my son was shaken at 8 weeks old by his biological father. I would NEVER hurt a child. I don't have that hurtfulness in me.
    I've not been writing a lot because I haven't officially begun detoxing. I've cut back to taking 5mg instead of my normal 10mg. That may be why I'm not functioning very well. I'm not giving myself the amount it really needs to not be somewhat sick.
    My mom came over tonight. I consider her my very best friend. And she always knows how to make me feel better. I came clean with her and she said she'll be right there helping me. She should be Sainted!
    I finally broke down and took a Xanax. Changed everything. I don't have any anxiety, scaredness, dark thoughts, etc. I'm very calm tonight. It feels absolutely amazing.
    My promise to you guys is that I will start posting more. Sunday I've decided to begin detox ct. I look forward to having you to help me through it...and I will most certainly help anyone who needs me. Helping people gives me great pleasure. I mean I did graduates college to be a cop. That plan didn't really work out.

    I just put my son to bed so I should lay down, unwind, and watch some mindless tv.

    Thank you all for being such kind humans. Xoox
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  6. #36
    Stell76 is offline Junior Member
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    Pheww thank God you are OK Jarl
    I did not mean to infer you hurt youre son I read all your past posts and know it was not youre fault ....
    In a panic when I read your post and saw hurt I just thought he had fallen again not that you hurt him...I see what you meant now
    So very glad you told your Mum about things...that must be such a weight off your shoulders...I always think keeping secrets is half of our problems
    I am in Aussie and its past my bed time so I must go...glad you are feeling a bit better enjoy your down time TV and I will talk in my morning...your afternoon I think
    Be kind to yourself Love Stell

  7. #37
    Stell76 is offline Junior Member
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    Sorry your name is Angie beautiful name for a beautiful soul !

  8. #38
    jarl is offline Junior Member
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    Good morning...

    So today is the day I picked to go CT. I just woke up in a panic. I really don't like the anxiety and depression that comes with even the slightest thought of withdrawals. To be honest, I'm very frightened. I want more than anything for the withdrawals to just be done.
    Here's what I have to help:
    Clonidine
    Gabapentin
    Imodium
    Ibuprofen
    What else will help?

    Happy Sunday...I pray
    Angie

  9. #39
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Good decision! Keep posting. By the end of the week, most of the physical stuff will be behind you. The list of comfort meds you have will help. Remember to have and drink plenty of fluids. Vitamin water, Gatorade, but anything will do. Stay away from caffeine for now. With the bathroom trips, if you don't drink enough you can become dehydrated quickly. Use the Immodium as instructed on the box. It helps! Don't be afraid of it either. Take 2 with the first event and 1 every event after that. I know the box has a max per day but take one whenever you need one. It'll be fine.

    Nourishment. Try to eat frequent small meals if you have to. Things that don't need much prep. Crackers, cheese, BANANAS! You know, things that you can grab quickly. Got a Ninja or blender? If you can, get some protein powder and make smoothies. I use Almond milk, raw honey, fruit and ice. The Gaba should help some with the RLS. Hot baths and as many as you can manage. It's pure relief while you're in the but. I slept there sometimes. I also used heating pads set on low for my legs and that gave some relief too. Hide the clocks. Try to stay busy however you can manage. I couldn't do much that would require concentration so mindless movies would help. Reading and posting here non-stop was HUGE for me.

    Good luck, sweetie. You can do this. Don't be scared, be excited. You are about the change your life for the better and this will be behind you soon.

    Peace,

    Cat

  10. #40
    jarl is offline Junior Member
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    Thank you Cat.
    I just took a gabapentin and clonidine. I'm just going to let them get going in my system and try to stay calm. After making the decision that today's the day, I started feeling a bit stronger...mentally. For the first time ever I am looking forward to getting through the withdrawals because I know who's waiting for me on the other side...the better me! No more pills me. It's freeing. Don't get me wrong, I'm still pretty scared. But because I actually WANT this this time, I feel differently towards things.
    I took my last one at 4a.m. this morning. By now I'd have taken two more just to get my day going. Nope! It's 830a.m. already.
    I came clean with The Boyfriend. I wish he was more understanding. But he doesn't really need to be...he will help me through this as much as he can.
    Enjoy the day,

    Angie

  11. #41
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    You are just like the rest of us..
    But since many of us have gone through it ..
    You can too..

    Hide your clocks..

    Take it minute by minute..

    The bottom line is there is no way around it .
    But through it..

    You have some good comforts Meds so you will be ok..
    Not perfect!
    But ok..

    Keep posting..
    And reading..

    You are so right your boyfriend will not understand this completely unless
    He has gone through it..
    That is ok..


    But it is great that he is supporting you..

    You are on your way..
    To freedom!
    It is so worth the fight!

    Bette

  12. #42
    jarl is offline Junior Member
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    Thank you Bette.

    The day just sucks! The depression and anxiety have returned. I think I can take another clonidine now so I'm going to do that.
    I'm so ashamed of where I'm at. I'm really glad this will be over soon.
    Is day three the worst? I'm scared of day three.
    I can't thank you all enough for the guidance and support.

    Angie
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  13. #43
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by jarl View Post
    Thank you Bette.

    The day just sucks! The depression and anxiety have returned. I think I can take another clonidine now so I'm going to do that.
    I'm so ashamed of where I'm at. I'm really glad this will be over soon.
    Is day three the worst? I'm scared of day three.
    I can't thank you all enough for the guidance and support.

    Angie
    I never considered Day 3 the worst. You're going to peak around 24 hours and stay steady for the next 3 days or so. It shouldn't get worse from there. Stay close by. We'll hold your hand. Promise.

    Peace,

    Cat

  14. #44
    jarl is offline Junior Member
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    I'm taking it very slow. I am angry today. Angry at the pills. I have found this new strength...I have NO idea where it's coming from but it's wild and making me feel like I can conquer anything I put my mind to. It's making me have confidence to go through this and come out the other side a new woman. That excites me. Is this a normal feeling??
    Thank you for holding my hand. I need it. And you guys...I need YOU!

    Angie

  15. #45
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Ahhhh. I remember those angry moments and I loved it too! It made me feel strong and resolved and ready to take on the world. Enjoy! I did (that part anyway).

    Peace,

    Cat
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  16. #46
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    Yes this is the time you have to let Yor feelings serve you..
    Turn anger and anxiety into
    Motivation and excitement..
    It is better if you try to stay busy because sitting around obsessing on how you feel is the worst thing
    You can do..
    You can do it!
    Take care
    Bette

  17. #47
    Prettytony is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stell76 View Post
    You are most welcome Jarl
    Let me see you have 15 perk left is that right with 13 days to go or in youre case 14 days until you see youre doctor
    I know you want to do something right this second but you like me will have to wait to see Dr...you have no choice
    Please be sensible and dont flush your pills at the moment
    If you can break them in half...with a half dose morning and night
    You might not be well but you will get through until you can see youre doc or maybe another doc
    I am in the same position...on a very low dose until the 22nd
    Now listen what either of us do after that ...tapper or not or maybe try subexone taper who knows but you have those 2 weeks to get through...
    Other than ditching what you have and going cold turkey...you will have to be strong and make those pills count or more importantly last ...please please do this
    The reason it did not work last time is because you went into full WD too quickly...no time for youre body or mind to adjust
    Why dont you get through this see yr doc get script re filled and look towards getting a new Doc...esp as this one wont seem to help you
    Please let us know what you decide and please space those pills you have left
    Just know I feel youre pain...you have not had it easy with youre son...best to think of your wellbeing and that of your kids just for the next few weeks...be strong and let me know what you decide ...it must be late at night go get some rest Love Stell
    this is certainly what you want to hear but def not what u need to hear. Your not new to the cycle. Beating around the bush, and lookin for an easy,, soft landing bridge from active addiction to sobriety just prolongs the misery. Nip it in the butt once and for all. No more! You can do it! 10 days!

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