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Codeine Addiction - Day 2 of CT
  1. #1
    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    Default Codeine Addiction - Day 2 of CT

    Hi everybody, I am a long term codeine user (on and off for the past 10 years). I am in my second attempt to quit, I successfully went off them for about 5 months last year but this time I am determined to do it for good. I have a successful career, wonderful husband and two beautiful kids. I don't drink or smoke or take any other substance. Nobody knows about my addiction. I have been taking up to 30 panadeine extra (15mg codeine and 500mg paracetamol) per day. Unfortunately in Australia, these meds are still available OTC so it isn't difficult for me to get my hands on them.

    I need to stop. That's it. I am worried about so many things (my health, the money I am spending on them, etc.) but I don't want to relapse again and so I am here. Last time I quit I read, but didn't participate in, a number of support forums. This time I am determined and so here I am.

    So I have quit cold turkey for about 48 hours. I still have to work although I would love to sit at home on the couch and watch Netflix!! Yesterday wasn't too bad - lots of trips to the toilet, a fair bit of anxiety, body aches, etc. I know the worst is yet to come as last time I think I hit my lowest point around Day 7. Slept ok last night, I took some Travacalm which makes me super drowsy and I think that helped a lot. Am also taking magnesium for RLS, Vit B and some other herbal remedies for stress and anxiety. I use a great product called Brauer Stress relief which you spray under the tongue. Great for a quick relief of panic and homeopathic so it's not addictive or anything. I also have melatonin and take Fluoxetine for anxiety.

    So that's about it. I need support to do this and so I am here. I want to get through this and I know I can with the right support mechanisms.

  2. #2
    Tiredandanxious15 is offline Junior Member
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    Lockyer,
    Way to go making this decision to quit. You having gone through wd before and coming out the other side is a huge benefit as you know what to expect and that there is light a the end of the tunnel. You just have to want it enough! I'm currently 2+ months clean from opiates and feeling great. Which brings up my next question.. What made you go back after five months? What are you going to do differently? Not trying to bring you down, I relapsed countless times but only after a couple weeks. This last time I found out that sitting around alone and the boredom is what would bring on the cravings. Needless to say I've been pretty busy lately haha. Ill be around and hoping for the best for you!

    -T&A

  3. #3
    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    Thanks for replying tiredandanxious. It means a lot to get this much needed support. Last time I think the killer for me was that my husband unknowingly bought my DOC as he was sick with the flu. Since he doesn't know about my issues, he didn't know any better and so I found them in the house and couldn't resist. Thought I could just take a few and be done but of course we all know it doesn't work like that! Unfortunately it fully kickstarted my habit again. This time I am not turning back. I am in the best shape I have been in since having kids, happy in my job and turning 40. I want everything in my life to be awesome and this addiction as you know does not fit in with that life plan.

    I'm on day 3 now and it hasn't been as bad as last time. Anxiety gets quite bad in the late afternoon but work is a great distraction for most of the day. Sleep has been pretty good. I can do this!!!

  4. #4
    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    So I'm on day 4 now and last night was the worst by far but not as bad as my worst days last time I went Through withdrawal. Have my period which is super painful so it's actually a good thing because I can focus on that and resting and not feel guilty! Have to go to the chemist this morning but I've no temptation to use. Yay!!

  5. #5
    alj15 is offline New Member
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    I'm so happy for you!!! I'm on the 5th day of recovery CT... Best decision I've ever made! Have you tried gabapentin for the anxiety? I feel wonderful and thinking clearly for the first time in4+ years! It also took 90% of my symptoms away. I thank God someone gave me the advice of using it. It has no addiction risk.
    Keep up the good work!!! We can do this!!

  6. #6
    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    Thanks for your reply alj15. I am on fluoxetine (Prozac) so gabapentin is likely contraindicated but thank you for your suggestion and I am glad it's working well for you.

    The last few days have been hard. I mentioned I have my period but I also have a huge fibroid which means pain pain pain. I haven't slowed down or taken any time to really look after myself during this period of detox so it's hit me hard today. Had two kids in bed with me last night so didn't sleep well and have decided to take a day off work just for some rest time. Plan on watching Netflix and maybe doing some baking. Hopefully it will help to keep the anxiety at bay. Day 6 today, hopefully it's all uphill from here.

  7. #7
    Tiredandanxious15 is offline Junior Member
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    It should be all uphill after day six! Was for me at least. I'd be willing to bet you got and little bit more sleep last night? If not, you're close. It's good you could get some time off to rest and regroup. If you haven't yet I would go out and get some exercise even if you just walk to the corner and back. It may not seem like much but you need to naturally start producing endorphins to help your brain come to balance. Dont give up now! You've made it too far and don't want to go through any more day ones.

    -T&A

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    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    Thanks tiredandanxious. Yesterday was pretty bad so I went to my doctor to get some Valium to get me through the next few days. I have used it in the past and there's no fear of addiction with this one and he only gave me 20 tablets so I'm sure by the end of this week I will be on the uphill. Last time I went through wd's, I hit my lowest at day 9 but every day after that started getting better.

    I have persisted in doing my kickboxing classes and they definitely help for a couple of hours. I think my problem is that I don't know how to slow down so I push and push and end up burning myself out. Yesterday was good to not have to worry about anything and have some me time. Back to work today which is hectic so hopefully it will keep my mind occupied. At this point I am over the physical cravings and onto the anxiety component but I know I can do it.

  9. #9
    alj15 is offline New Member
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    I'm so glad to check back in and see you are doing well!!!!
    And I started my period on my second day of WD! Our stories are so similar, it's crazy! The only thing at this point that is my issue is my energy. I sleep fine, my mood is well, and finally off the imodium and can hold down simple, lightweight meals.
    And I have lupus. I used that as an excuse to keep using. I kept saying, i just want to enjoy my time left with my little girl, but it seems i was jusy in fast foward and not truly 'enjoying' anything. I honestly cant remeber a lot of my feelings while i was on the vic. All i remember is the energy. I never got a 'high' per say, but it did take away my RA pain and kept me going. I just wanted to be be super mom/wife and forget my illness. I stopped going to the dr, just because i didnt want to deal with my issues. Thats the day i realized i had a HUGE problem. I was suppose to go see this world renoun Rhuem.and i didnt go because i didnt want to hear any bad news. I broke down at 2 am and told my husband EVERYTHING. He was so surpised he had no clue.
    We have some things to work through, but we are doing it together and to me, that's all that matters.
    I know I didn't provide any advice, but hopefully this will reach someone and provide hope.
    Good luck and God bless!

  10. #10
    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    Thanks alj15, today was good. I've been plugged in to music for two days at work and it's helped a lot! Have just been focusing on getting things done. Still a fair bit of anxiety but I had a healing session with a colleague of mine today and it did wonders. I was calm and focused for the rest of the day. Kickboxing as much as possible too and it's amazing, I am pushing myself harder than ever before. Maybe the opiates were slowing me down and I am now realising my potential!

    I feel like I am over the worst of it now. Over a week clean, woo!!

  11. #11
    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    Ten days!! Woop. Feeling pretty damn good, just a bit of manageable anxiety. I'm done with this >>>> once and for all!!

  12. #12
    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    Still here still going strong!! But the anxiety is a killer and I can barely sit still. I am so pumped up with energy I feel like I'm in a manic state - is this normal/common? I'm loving the energy but not the inability to calm down.
    Elcey likes this.

  13. #13
    Tiredandanxious15 is offline Junior Member
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    The energy will most likely come and go in waves for a little while. Your body is probably still getting used to life without opiates and how to balance everything properly. Congrats on having made it this far! Don't forget why you've done this and everything you've gone through in the process.

    -T&A

  14. #14
    Elcey is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lockyer121 View Post
    Still here still going strong!! But the anxiety is a killer and I can barely sit still. I am so pumped up with energy I feel like I'm in a manic state - is this normal/common? I'm loving the energy but not the inability to calm down.
    Boy Lockyer, I surely never experienced any energy states! LOL Mostly just feelings of being unmotivated and dragged out. I'm now at Day 14, so we're very close. Dunno. Like was also mentioned it'll probably come and go for some time to come, so I say enjoy while it's here.

    Just like the sleep being up and down, enjoy the respites. I understand the hi's and low's start to be not so startling and become a little more balanced as time goes on.

    How's about we both keep going and see what happens! Congrats on your time!
    Elcey

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    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    Hey Elcey, thanks for your reply. I'm now nearly three weeks clean and feeling good about that. Unfortunately I seem to have manifested a state called hypomania so I went and saw a psychiatrist today. He has prescribed Epilem (sodium valproate) to help stabilise my moods because I was feeling up all the time and also self medicating with alcohol. It never ends does it! Anyway, feeling good about the plan moving forward and putting this all behind me.

    Seeing the psychiatrist was really confronting. I literally told him everything about my life. He was quite surprised that the mania has manifested as he would have expected the opposite but I guess I've really messed up my brain chemistry. I hope my poor body can recover from this and go on to live a long and healthy life. It get good to get it all off my chest. I'm feeling positive moving forward.

  16. #16
    Elcey is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lockyer121 View Post
    Hey Elcey, thanks for your reply. I'm now nearly three weeks clean and feeling good about that. Unfortunately I seem to have manifested a state called hypomania so I went and saw a psychiatrist today. He has prescribed Epilem (sodium valproate) to help stabilise my moods because I was feeling up all the time and also self medicating with alcohol. It never ends does it! Anyway, feeling good about the plan moving forward and putting this all behind me.

    Seeing the psychiatrist was really confronting. I literally told him everything about my life. He was quite surprised that the mania has manifested as he would have expected the opposite but I guess I've really messed up my brain chemistry. I hope my poor body can recover from this and go on to live a long and healthy life. It get good to get it all off my chest. I'm feeling positive moving forward.
    Hey back! So good you're trying to look after yourself Lockyer. Too often we don't bother, or claim we don't have the time, always the excuse. I'm experiencing some super excited days with some anxiety now like you described - but it is all self-induced, that is outside forces that are going on in my life. Everything is under control, just really busy. Trying to stay as balanced as I can.

    And I just past 3 weeks Sunday night. I'm really glad you're still on the path and I'm quite sure that as long as you're comfortable with your psychiatrist, lots of inner stuff can be sorted out. Have you ever considered AA or NA meetings? Trying to come down by using alcohol might not be such a great idea. No offence meant, just sayin'. I know how quickly I'm able to transfer addictions off on to another thing. I've even been addicted to oatmeal, and I mean seriously - 2 and 3 bowls each night before BED. Then just lying in my carbo-state! Wow. For me, it's whatever might make me feel different (not even necessarily better), just different from how I'm feeling at any particular time. That is where I have to learn to sit with whatever state I'm in and accept it for what it is - a passing moment, sometimes hour.

    Keep posting Lockyer, I want to keep updated with how you're doing - good and bad.
    Elcey

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    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    [deleted - swearing]
    Last edited by Anonymous; 08-14-2017 at 07:54 PM.

  18. #18
    Elcey is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lockyer121 View Post
    [deleted - swearing]
    Not sure why your post was deleted due to swearing Lockyer - I didn't see anything offensive or even bad. Just reposting the "Four weeks today" part for you. And saying congratulations!! I am also just past 4 weeks, but due to my AA training, will be going in the by-the-month method. That may sound like I'm being egotistic about remaining clean month by month, and I certainly don't feel that, it's just I have trouble with the daily counting. Actually makes me feel like it's grinding on - although I do know that it's one day at a time!

    So any lingering effects or issues? I didn't last night (first time in 4 weeks) have RLS, but that has been a bear for me, and of course leading to even more insomnia trouble than I usually have. I'm in the middle of a big 'project' that's keeping me pretty engaged so not doing too bad motivationally. How about you?? I'm always interested, especially b/c we are so close in timing. YAY US!!

    Hugs for now, Elcey

  19. #19
    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    It was deleted because I said holy c*ap!!! Didn't think that was a particularly offensive word but hey!! Anyway four weeks yay! I'm feeling pretty good just having some mental health issues but that's not surprising considering how long I abused codeine for. But I am proactively working through that and it's going well.
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  20. #20
    Elcey is offline Member
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    Good on you Lockyer! Hope you stay in touch as you progress.
    Elcey

  21. #21
    Lockyer121 is offline New Member
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    I just had to check and see how long it's been since I last took opiates - 8 weeks today! I've intermittently had the urge to use but haven't given in to my cravings. Yay!
    Autumnhopes likes this.

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