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Coming off opiates for good!
  1. #151
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Michelle,

    It's nice to hear you sounding so positive. You had quite a rough patch there but I'm glad that Randy and Bette got you on track. I was worried about you. I didn't say much but I was reading and trying to just stay out of the way. Glad things have smoothed out for you.

    Peace,

    Cat
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  2. #152
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Good morning Michelle
    Gitterdun! You sound great and i couldn't be happier for you!
    I am headed for "day of beauty" today at the salon. LOL. Then, i'll wander over to another store and pick out new flooring for a room that's been waiting since June 2015
    for some attention!
    It's just beginning to really sink in that it's over! I still wake up at 4:30 am daily to take my dose/get dressed for the clinic. Except that i don't have to do that anymore.
    So, instead, here i am wishing you the best day possible and Godspeed your healing!

  3. #153
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    Cat,
    Don't ever feel like you have to 'Stay out of the way" You are a very special person and your input is always welcomed. I love to hear from you and your advice is always solid. I read your post to a lot of people and you have a unique way of taking someone under your wing when they need help.
    I went to my doc today and he had my sub prescription at 16 mgs a day. I tried to tell him I was only on 4mgs but he wasn't listening to me. So, I just gave up. I'll just cut the films down to my 4mgs and go with it.
    Life is looking so good right now. I can honestly say I haven't felt this good since I fell off that darn ladders.
    My wish is for everyone here, to feel as good as I do!
    Blessings to all
    Michelle
    xxoo
    ps Cat I want you to butt in anytime!!!
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  4. #154
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockandhardplace View Post
    I went to my doc today and he had my sub prescription at 16 mgs a day. I tried to tell him I was only on 4mgs but he wasn't listening to me. So, I just gave up. I'll just cut the films down to my 4mgs and go with it.
    Life is looking so good right now.

    I can honestly say I haven't felt this good since I fell off that darn ladders.

    Hi Michelle,

    Can't tell you how happy it makes me to know your feeling so good! Not sure you believed you could feel this way a week or so ago. A little time makes all the difference. Proud of you for sticking to the plan.

    The sub doctor sounds like a nut. Lol. Just take whatever he gives and go your way. Save all the extra subs. You should very soon, if you don't already, have plenty of subs to completely finish your taper. Then you can tell that doctor bye bye and never have to see him again.

    Also, If you could get the 2mg sub films it would be to your advantage. They're exactly the same size as the 8mg ones and the cutting into smaller doses would be even easier. Just a thought for you to consider.

    Keep posting how your feeling everyday of possible. I'm sure many are reading along wondering how your doing.

    Randy
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  5. #155
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Good morning Michelle
    So very happy that ur feeling better. It's better than winning the lottery.
    It will all be a memory soon, eh?
    I wake up at 4 am still. Got so used to it. But i don't have to take anything now and i don't have to go to the clinic or worry about What If a Hurricane hits? Lol
    I often wished i had the 2 mg subs once i was cutting those tiny increments. But it is what it is and we make it work. That's the thing about Determination--we Make it work because sometimes it doesn't want to work> Lol
    Post when u can...

  6. #156
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Good Morning Michelle,

    Looks like the early birds are out and singing this morning. I can almost count on the same people either following me around or me following them. Today, Ming beat me to the boards. Good Morning Ming!

    Hope I see a post from you today and that you're still doing wonderfully. Such good news.

    Peace,

    Cat
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  7. #157
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Hey Michelle
    Still waking up around 4 am every morning. How's your sleep? Lol. what a super-precious commodity sleep really is.
    Hope you're sleeping peacefully and get to wake up pleasantly to a "good morning Michelle" note or three! Have you ever heard back from Redfish?

  8. #158
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    Hi Michelle..
    Just checking in to say
    Way to go..
    You are doing great.
    I would not even bother discussing this with your dr..
    As you know many of them have control issues..
    You don't need him firing you for being non compliant..
    Crazy but it does happen..
    Just do like Randy says
    Nod your head
    Get your sub..
    Be on your way..
    Not rea
    Lu a way to live with a honest program..
    But Drs sometimes are very unreasonable..
    You are we both know
    Have to look out for you!
    Have a great day!
    Bette
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  9. #159
    Anonymous Guest

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    Wont let me post on my own thread!!

  10. #160
    Anonymous Guest

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    Sorry I haven't checked in the last few days. All was going well and thought my insurance was all squared away for authorizing my sub films. I had been using a few the doc had gave me. Today I ran out and found out that they denied me. So I'm back on the tabs till I can appeal. I'd been feeling really good lately, but now it's back to feeling sick to my stomach all day. Oh well, guess I have no choice but to deal. Then I just got a call that my aunt passed away. I had been meaning to go see her and just hadn't got around to it. She is actually my great aunt, (my grandmothers sister) but my grandparents raised me and she lived right next door to us. She was a God send when my grandfather passed away, always stopping in and checking on my gram for me. She was a wonderful lady and will be missed terribly. RIP Aunt Net.
    Michelle
    xxoo
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  11. #161
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Dear Michelle
    I'm sorry you're having to deal with so much. Your aunt truly was a God send and stepped up when she was most needed.
    The insurance company is ridiculous but let me ask--why not just pay out of pocket for the films in the meantime. Why take the pills if they make u sick?
    I was able to detox using ONE packet of 30-8mg strips. Have leftovers in fact. Yup, it's costly, but i only had to do it One time.
    Just a thought....
    Hope u feel better.

  12. #162
    Anonymous Guest

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    Would love to be able to do that, but we are running really low on money. It's only been my husbands paycheck for the last 6 months. Our checking acct. has $37 in it and we have to make it till next thurs. when he gets paid again. We looked into refi of our mortgage, and with our taxes coming back soon it should help us. But in the meantime.... We will be ok, I hope, but I do worry a lot about our financial status. Money isn't everything, but it has to at least pay the bills. We don't spend money on anything but groceries and my meds.
    It won't kill me to be sick a little longer. Hoping next week they will finally get their act together. I'm still hanging in. Very tired still, don't know if that's normal.
    Hope all is well with all my peeps! Drop me a line, could use some cheering up.
    Michelle
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  13. #163
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    The live entertainment has arrived! The band tunes up, I'm doing the splits and stretching my quads and glutes. A few back bends and I'll be ready. Lalalalala. Warming up the vocal chords (ouch that hurts my ears). Give me a year or two and then let the show begin! We can have another Woodstock! Yeah. I'll give Stevie Nicks a call to see if she's available. Poor Janis Joplin. She won't be able to make it. I think I heard that she's singing "Take Another Piece of My Heart" to your aunt. Mick may be able to make it. I just spoke with him yesterday. Any requests? I know people who know people. I'm older than you so my folks may not be your style. Oh well. Take what you can get. That will likely be me.

    Sorry you've got some bumps right now and about your aunt, of course.

    Peace,

    Cat
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-16-2016 at 01:35 PM.

  14. #164
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Get on YouTube and watch Pharrel sing "Happy". I love that. And a little Bruno Mars and "Uptown Funk". That's the extent of my play list of almost current tunes.

  15. #165
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Hey Michelle
    Sorry about the situation. I would take a credit card advance for the one-time outlay for the subs. That's just me, but i'm really tired of feeling sick so i figure u are too. Really, i only needed to buy them once. Just once. I have leftovers.
    Just a thought incase the insurance doesn't come thru.
    Hang in there!

  16. #166
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    Cat,
    Let me say I just love your style!! You have the ability to make me laugh no matter how bad I feel. Thanks Mick, Stevie, Janis. Their right up my alley. The classics. I love all kinds of music, but the legends you just can't deny. The guest list is rounding up nice.
    Speaking of stretching your glutes and quads, I've started a little exercise routine. We have a total gym and an eliptical. It aint much, but it's something. I even attempted bringing our wood in, so my hubby wouldn't have to do it when he gets home from work. It took me a while, but mission accomplished. Now I'm whipped.
    Blessings my friend, and thanks for the pick me up!
    Michelle
    xxo

  17. #167
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    Hey there Ming,
    We try to stay away from credit cards, because when our son was sick, we were living on them. Got in a bad jam. But we will come up with something. I'm going to call them (insurance company) and try to talk to them tomorrow. Thanks for the thought.
    How are you doing? Still feeling like you have the flu? I bet you get just a little less sick each day. Your sticking to your guns, and it's going to pay out those dividen's soon. Keep up the great work.
    Ming23 likes this.

  18. #168
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    Hi Michelle..
    Total gyms are awesome..
    An elliptical ..
    You have so many things to use to help..
    Hip hob abs..
    I love and do a few times a week..
    If you could write down 5 things a day you are grateful for.
    You will be amazed at what that gratitude can do for you!
    Gratitude is sometimes so hard to reconcile with
    Especially after going through all this..
    But you made it..
    You know what the problem was and are in the process of fixing it!
    Your husbands is there whenever you need him!
    Honestly ..
    That gratitude has saved my butt more than once in this last year..
    Plus it gives you a boost of feel good endorphins..
    Those are always nice!

    I am coming up on my year 1/30/16..
    I am so grateful for the people that have been here to support me and teach me!
    Thank you
    Michelle..

    Bette


    I am answering the phones tonight for AA central..
    Speaking to someone newly clean or sober!
    Now that will make me grateful faster than anything..
    Except for
    By the grace of
    God
    There go I..
    We are blessed to be here!
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  19. #169
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    Bette,
    What a great idea about the gratitude list! Such a small thing to help you remember what's really important in life. I forget to do that sometimes. >>>>> and complain about the small things, when I should be thankful for the good things. You'd think with all the loss I've had, that it should be at the forefront of my thoughts. But many days it's not!!

    My hope for this year, is too not only be free of all my addictions, but to improve my health with exercise and eating right. Also to have a better attitude and not be so negative all the time. I want to be the person I used to be before addiction took hold of me. I was someone with energy, positive thinking and just an all around happy person you'd want to hang out with.
    I want her back and then some, and the only thing I have to do is fight for it. I know I can do it. I feel myself getting stronger and more focused everyday.
    So, thanks Bette for just being you! You are a wealth of knowledge and have a gift for being able to touch many people, because you have the biggest heart and really care!!
    You and many others on this forum, have been the most incredible gift. An invaluable gift beyond all measure
    Blessings to all
    Michelle
    xxoo
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  20. #170
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    Thank you Michelle..
    Everything I say to you I say to myself..
    We are very much alike..
    It can be tough..
    But that using was tough too..
    A full time job..
    I am so proud of you..
    You hung tough..
    Shows how much you want this..
    And you will get all the things you lost before..
    And
    More..
    Because we are different people..
    Now..

    That was then and this is now!

    We can have what we want.
    Sometimes being free is enough!
    Honestly how many shoes can a girl wear at the same time?
    But freedom from active addiction..
    I will take all Of that I can get!
    Right?
    Keep on keeping on..
    And
    Doing you!
    You rock!
    Bette
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-19-2016 at 12:03 AM.
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  21. #171
    Anonymous Guest

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    How many shoes can a girl where..... That's a loaded question! lol
    Iluv2smile likes this.

  22. #172
    Hearshot_Kid is offline Junior Member
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    Rock,
    I'm new so I'm super late to the party, but I read through your story and wanted to make a suggestion. Quite a ways back you were looking for inspiration; I'm not sure if you've ever seen Notes From the Universe? It's one of those things that has really helped me mentally. When you sign up you can enter goals (mine was "get off those subs!") but whatever suits your needs. You get an email every day at like 5 am which is nice because that's my hardest hour for insomnia and anxiety. Anyway it's personalized and encouraging, and has really helped me in case you're interested. I hope you're feeling well today!

  23. #173
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Good morning Michelle
    Hope it's going well for you today. Has your body adjusted to those generics yet? I read Randy's post on UncleLeo's thread re: sub production and distribution from the parent company. We are like pioneers here on the sub frontier. It will be interesting to see where society goes with this sub thing.
    Back in the 80s, i had a friend who was on 100mg methadone--his was the highest dose at the clinic, at that time. When Betty and Randy told me they had been prescribed 200mg daily (within the past 2 years), it was mind-blowing to think that the clinics would authorize such high doses. What happened in 30 years to make the doctors double the doses? So, what will they do with subs in the future, i wonder?
    No matter, we're here and now. And your doses are dropping like autumn leaves...
    Proud of you!
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  24. #174
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    Hello all!! Today I'm feeling a little off. I am still taking generic subs which have been playing havoc with my stomach. Been fighting my insurance company to try and get on the Sub films which worked well for me in the past. To date, I was told their was no other substitution for the subs other than the generic burprehnorphine/naloxone or the just the generic burprehnorphine without nalaxone. Now their telling me I have to try Zublsolv. (Even though I was told their was no other such drub available)
    So, now I start researching yet ANOTHER drug and found it might be a good alternative. I'm willing to try anything to get rid of this nauseous feeling. Zubsolv is different from subs in that it takes a smaller dose to do the same as a comparable dose of subs. My doc has written the script for 1.4/0.36 which is the smallest dose they make. I like that fact.
    Even though, I've tried to be very optimistic, it's still feels like there have been more days than not, that I've felt unstable. I know I'm in the right ball park, but I've yet to get in the game. If that makes any sense to anyone.
    Anyway, if anyone out there has any experience with this drug, I would love some feedback. (what to expect, does it work well, any side effects..etc...)
    Michelle
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  25. #175
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Good morning Michelle
    Sorry ur still fighting w the ins co. Sucks. Randy probably knows all about the Zubsolv. I've heard it's got the same ingredients as regular subs. He'll tell you what u need to know...
    I had the films thru my entire taper and had stomach issues anyway; so, i don't know what to say!
    I used approximately 20 or less 8-mg foils in my 4-month taper and have 6 unopened leftover plus all those darn lil pieces we cut along the way. What i'm saying is, it took far fewer subs than i thought it would. You'll only have to buy them One time, should u find that u have to go the out-of-pocket route. Just saying...
    We all want you to feel better. I'm rooting for you!!

  26. #176
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    Michelle..
    Just hoping on to see how you are doing?
    So no more films?
    God
    A year ago no more pills
    What other kind of BS are these people going to come up with?
    It really does sux..
    Especially because you are trying to do the right thing..
    Zubzolve might be ok..
    Idk that much about it..
    To be honest with you ..
    I have not really been that interested in learning..
    About a new way to prescribe sub when it seems like
    The pharmaceutical companys is going in circles..
    Crazy!
    But you will do ok..
    Whatever comes up
    Because you want this and have already
    Attained
    Warrior
    Status!

    Anyway my lab BooBoo is in the hospital
    He
    Is in acute kidney failure..
    But doing better..
    Although he is 16
    He is healthy otherwise and the rest of his lab work came back perfect..
    I will give him a chance..
    He has been with me through
    Everything for 15.5 years..
    As long as he is not uncomfortable
    We will fight for him..

    He is coming home Saturday!
    Already eating his kidney diet dog food..
    And getting up and going out to pee at the vet hospital..
    The vet took a picture of him yesterday for me
    He looked quite comfortable in his
    Little hospital suite..
    With his IV going with all its Meds and vitamins in the IV solution..
    This has been tough..
    But I am glad I am clean to experience the pain!
    It is refreshing as strange as that may sound..

    I came back to post this am
    And was looking for your thread..
    I posted on someone else's
    And
    Up pops yours on the new posts!
    Ming bumped yours up..
    At the perfect time!
    Thank you Ming!
    Rock
    On
    Michelle!
    Bette
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-22-2016 at 07:10 AM.
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  27. #177
    Anonymous Guest

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    So a.m. check in... So far so good. I took the 2 doses which is supposed to = 4mgs of sub. (1.4/0.36 zubsolv). So technically, I'm taking less burprenorpine. That's a plus. Maybe this could be just as good as subs. When I start my taper, it could make the process a little easier?
    I'm going to check in with Randy and see what he thinks. I'm not trying to rush things. I know that I need the time to stabilize, and concentrate on the here and now.
    Still open to anyone who has been on this drug or knows about it.
    Thanks and blessing to everyone for a great day
    Michelle
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  28. #178
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Good morning Michelle
    You sound good! Happy for you! This will be over before u know it. You are determined and that's what will make all the diff when the going gets tough.
    Randy's right about the mind-games too. Old habits (of thinking) die hard....

  29. #179
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    Stomach is a little off this morning, not sure what that's about. Hope this med isn't the cause. Going to try eating something, even though I'm not used to eating 1st thing . Cold but beautiful day out. Focus on the positive not the neg. That's a harder habit to get out of than I realize. Been so neg, for so long. Gotta change my attitude if I'm going to make it out the other side.
    Happy Sunday everyone!!
    Michelle
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  30. #180
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Michelle
    You're so right! We've been negative for a long time. It crept up on us. It's wild as we start realizing these behaviors, eh? It's the same for me. Exactly.
    The mental battle is formidable. Randy's right about that.
    I pray a lot more these days and forgive.

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