Page 9 of 11 FirstFirst ... 7891011 LastLast
Results 241 to 270 of 322
Like Tree324Likes
Coming off opiates for good!
  1. #241
    Anonymous Guest

    Default Anxiety!!! Help!!!

    I just can't believe I can be so on top of the world one day and down so far the next. Yes, I've heard of bipolar but this is just nuts!! I can't remember the last time I've felt so much anxiety. Yesterday, I woke and got my husband off to work like any other day. I felt a little uneasy after that, but that's not anything out of the ordinary as I've hit my 11th day of not smoking cigs. My best buddy has moved to Florida, so we have reinvented the lost art of being pen pals. I wrote her a lengthy letter and as soon as I was done, I had this wave of anxiety hit me like a cement block. Panic attack and all said and done (approx 2 hrs later) I was finally able to breath a little more normal, but still very shaky and my heart was still beating out of my chest. Off and on for the rest of the day crying and just feeling so overwhelmed. I know some issues have to do with quitting smoking and the surgery coming up, having to start the juicing diet on Monday until the 17th (day of surgery). Also my husband has been showing signs of stress, which is so unlike him. He used to to be the most easy going guy you would want to meet. Many things have changed at his job which has been causing some of that stress, but I also know that he is worried about me going into surgery and everything that could go wrong. Having to use opiates for pain is the #1 concern. I have gave him such grief with my long lasting love affair of opiates.
    I think because I cut back on the amount of lorazapam that might have something to do with the intensity. I was only taking at the most 3mgs daily and I've cut down to around 0.5-1 mg, so I don't think that has a lot to do with it, but maybe a small role.
    So whatever the cause of this sudden severe anxiety, it just hit me so hard and so fast out of no where, it's scary as h#@L !!! Makes you feel so weak and vulnerable that you question and second guess yourself.
    Anyone want to chime in and give their 2 cents, support would be very welcomed.
    This morning is a little better but I'm so afraid it will come back out of the blue again. Am I going to be tough enough to make it through this very difficult year that I'm putting my body through????
    Blessings to all,
    Michelle
    Last edited by Anonymous; 03-05-2016 at 10:06 AM.

  2. #242
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,146

    Default

    Yikes Michelle,

    I hope today goes better for you. I'm sure your anxiety is mostly about thinking what you have in store for you in the coming weeks with surgery and the fallout from that. I've only had two surgeries in my entire life. The most recent back surgery and I had brain surgery almost 20 years ago. Oddly, I wasn't nervous about either one of them. I had done my research and chose what I considered to be the best surgeons I could find (connected with them on a personal level too) and gave the rest up to God. I'm not deeply religious (I am very spiritual) but letting it go into the universe was oddly comforting to me. Try to look at it this way. You have two options. The first is to move forward in order to get better both physically and mentally OR you can remain stagnant. I vote for the first choice because honestly, you don't want to be where you are right now. Right? Right.

    What dose of subs are you on right now? I'm pretty ignorant where this is concerned, but I'm sure you can educate me. With your first surgery just a couple of weeks away, what is the plan for pain control post surgery? This leads me into my next brilliant suggestion for you. You are probably right that your husband's anxiety/worry is about your pending surgery and praying that you will be OK. He probably too is thinking about the pain control fall-out. Here's what I'm thinking and forgive me if you've already done this. Catch hubby and have a heart to heart with him. He's been so supportive of you, it just may be time for you to the "The Rock" (no pun intended). Reassure him that you're going to be just fine and this is the first step in 2016 to become a healthier and better you. Let him know that you are worried about pain control post surgery and ask him to be supportive and perhaps be in control of the pill bottle. It may make him feel better about having some control over the outcome and it'll make him feel so much better that you have asked for that instead of worrying and waiting to see. Involve him in a positive way. You have a lot going on in the coming weeks/months. This is all really good stuff! But...you have to take Step 1 before you can take Step 2 and each step after that. Don't worry about the things that are still a bit in the future. Do what needs to be done now. There's more instances than recovery that we need to back up and just take on day at a time.

    All that is coming your way is scary stuff but with a very exciting edge to it! You'll be sporting that bikini just in time for your back surgery so that you'll be ready for the photo session at Sports Illustrated.

    Peace,

    Cat

  3. #243
    ItsPossible is offline Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    347

    Default

    HI Michelle,
    Just catching up on your thread I realized that many people seemed to be going through similar energies... worry, anxiety, grieving for the past. Cat took the words right out of my keyboard... it may be time for you to be his ROCK.
    There are blessings in disguise and when others need us it may be enough to pull our focus away from ourselves and help our loved ones. It can feel so good to help those who have helped us.
    LET GO, LET GOD.. whoever that is to you... to me its the universe.
    Deep breath... we can not control anything and there can be some clarity in that. If we can't control what will happen, that what are we worrying about? All we can control is our reactions. RESPONSES. How will you respond to stress, to anxiety, to worry. If I have a solution before the issue arises, I have more confidence in how to respond. DOesn't always work out that way but I know I can prepare myself to deal with things before they happen. So many of my friends are going through difficult times right now and I also have felt the need to isolate myself for the last few days.
    All these thoughts going on in my head and my husband has no idea what I am stressing about.
    Poor guy thinks he can't do anything right. If he only knew I've been worried about using again and living the old way of life.
    I feel great working out, but also sore all the time. I work with aggressive youth and am on my knees restraining to keep them safe. I feel impatient and angry and today I have decided to go easy on myself. Every time a self sabotaging thought enters my mind I say NO... not today. Today I am feeling good. Today I will go with the flow. Today I will love myself enough to get out of my head, and into my life! TODAY, is all I have and TODAY will be respected.
    I let my heart beat fast if it needs. I take deep breathes outside looking up at the sky. I look around and name everything I am thankful for. I rest when I need. I talk when I want. I pray that you find some peace in your day. I pray you find comfort in knowing that things will work out, maybe not the way we imagined, but they will. I pray you love yourself today!
    Love and light being sent to you!
    Butterfly xxoo

  4. #244
    Anonymous Guest

    Default

    As always I can count on Cat and Kim aka Butterfly to give me a good boost of shake it off, and live in the moment.
    Cat,
    It's so funny that you talked about having a pow wow with the hubby, cuz I did, (great minds think alike) and I think he feels a little better for it. I just explained that my head is on straight now as far as the pain meds go, but just because I say that, doesn't mean when their in front of me I'll feel the same. Odds are, the addict in me is going to want to gobble a handful down. That being said, I assured him that there is no question that I want him in control of them.
    I remember feeling the same way with my foot surgery. "Oh, no I'm not going to take any unless I absolutely have to." That was good for less than a week. Before you knew it I was hoarding as many extra's as I could, plus taking the prescribed amount. Then came the hide and seek game, which by far I rank #1. I am like a trained drug dog when it comes to finding ANY of his hiding places.

    Any who, my plan is to cut off my subs 3 days prior to surgery. Right now I'm on 6mgs, and I'm hoping that maybe after the surgery I could just ditch them altogether. I really just want to be free of any and ALL drugs. But I know I have a back up plan if that doesn't work. I'm not going to pressure myself. I am embracing getting comfortable being un-comfortable.
    Last night I proved that in a big way.. I broke completely out of my comfort zone. My husband plays drums and has been practicing with a buddy from work who has a grand-daughter that sings AMAZING. They had their 1st gig last night and he didn't think I would be going to watch him. I'm a bit a of a recluse lately because of my weight and anxiety. I just don't go out and do things that involve being around people. Anyway, I went with him, and I had the best time! I met this girls family and their super nice people. They all think Bob really helped her come out of her shell, because she is only 17, she has zero band/stage experience. The whole thing got me so excited to start practicing my music again, also this girls mother had bariatric surgery, so I talked with her at length about some of my fears, and I can see us becoming fast friends. She was one of those rare people you meet and you instantly feel like you've been friends forever.
    Hey Kim.. I LOVE your quote: "Get out of your head and into your life." That's exactly what I need to be doing. Last night I was on a high. It was an old high I used to get when I performed music. When I say old, I mean pre addiction old. I remember that feeling so vividly, and it's been at least 17 years. I performed for many years after my addiction, but it was mostly a blur, and those feel good hormones were very dulled.

    So, going from neurotic, anxiety attack on Friday to having the best day on Saturday, kinda reminds me of the weather in my area. They say: "if you don't like the weather, just wait a minute and it'll change." I guess it's all part of the process. Some days are going to be better than others, but hopefully I find that sweet spot where the good ones out-weight the bad.

    Blessed Sunday, hope we all find the "sweet spot"
    Michelle

  5. #245
    Anonymous Guest

    Default

    Well yesterday was the 1st day of the journey to a new me. Had to start juicing which consist of mostly protein shakes, sugar free puddings, cream of wheat and many other liquidy things that have a milk base to it. Not the most tasty, but I'm going to get some popsicles, fudgicles, and sugar free frozen yogurt tomorrow. whohoo!!
    Not complaining 1 bit though. I even make my husband meals and it hasn't really bothered me not eating. I guess I know it's for a good cause and there will be a wonderful light at the end of the tunnel. I did cave on the smoking. I got to 12 days. I was so mad at myself, but I know I can do it now. But now that I'm not eating I think I'm going to have to wait till after the surgery.
    I'm really getting excited, but not for the intro to pain meds again. My doc said I'm going to need something that 1st wk after, and I of course have to stop 4 days prior. Who knows, maybe I can just get off the pain meds and try not going back to the subs. That would be fantastic!! With all the stuff I'm doing now I feel stronger. This is my time, and I'm not going to waste anymore.
    Hope everyone is feeling blessed today
    Michelle
    Ming23 and Catrina like this.

  6. #246
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,146

    Default

    What a great attitude Michelle. I agree! You are looking at a much brighter, happier future and you're doing the work to get there. Love it!

    Peace,

    Cat

  7. #247
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,146

    Default

    Michelle,

    There's a new member "grap" The title of his thread is "Old and mixed up.....". Can you go read his thread start to finish and give him your input. He's been on percs, vicodin, etc for a looonnnng time. Thing is, he never exceeded 40 mg/day and most of the time takes 10!!! His PM doctor started him on bup last week!!! He hates it and wants off. Anyway, the question is if he stops the sub entirely and begins to treat his pain and symptoms with oxy (he still has tons of it because he never finishes his scripts) will he have awful fallout from that?

    Please read his thread from the beginning and let him (and me) know what you think.

    Peace,

    Cat

    AND THANKS!

  8. #248
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2015
    Posts
    2,086

    Default

    Hey Michelle
    Haven't heard from ya in a bit. Getting ready for a procedure? Thinking of you and wishing you the best...

  9. #249
    Anonymous Guest

    Default

    Cat,
    Just read thru Grap's thread. What are these doctors thinking about these days. Hate hearing stories like his because it's all too common. I posted to him, although I don't think I could offer him anything that you and Ming hadn't covered already. I just felt like I let you (and him) down, by not being there when you needed answers. Thank goodness Ming chimed in. I have to say I was very honored that you recommending me. It was weird, almost like I got a promotion at my job. I know that sounds ridiculous right? You were just trying to give this poor guy the right advice. But that's how my crazy mind works. So, thanks for that. What's next boss??? lol
    For future reference about subs and pain meds.. I took my last sub dose about 3 hours prior to my accident, and when I was riding in the ambulance to the hospital, they gave me morphine, and I was like.. what?? I don't feel anything, what a rip off. It just cancels out because the sub blocks everything. Which leads me to my next panic attack... My sub doc said to stop them 2 days prior to surgery. But we all know how much sub is still in my system, as I've been taking 6mgs for a month or so.
    I'm going to try again to just stay off these subs, and just ween off opiates, or better yet just go cold turkey. How bad can it be? I'm not going to be able to eat anything for almost a month.
    Oh joy, joy!
    Hey, all kidding aside, I want you to know how incredible you are!!! The way you stayed with that guy, and kept checking on him, oh yeah and not to mention the perfect advice you offered. I think you should trade in you ballerina/tap shoes and be a doctor. Lord knows we need some good ones.

    Blessings to you for being you!!
    Michelle
    xxoo
    ItsPossible likes this.

  10. #250
    ItsPossible is offline Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    347

    Default

    Hey girl,
    I replied to you on my thread and talked about a few things but wanted to come here and catch up with you!
    So surgery is coming and all those feelings you are feeling are def normal. I am sure they don't feel good but I love how you are coping with it.
    Smoking is incredibly hard to quit and it took me reading THE EASY WAY TO WUIT SMOKING book, by Allen Carr to truly understand why. Have you read it? Even if you haven't had any since that night it would still be a great read. It gives you a different perspective on how we think about cigarettes. For example, instead of thinking I can't have one, we can think, I am done being a slave to smoking and I am happy to choose not having one.
    I must admit I did start again when I quit but for the time I was smoke free, I just felt completely better about myself. It effects our central nervous system and stresses us out more. I've always had one when stressed... go figure.
    Anywhooooo, What else is going on? Music and being creative will def help being you int the present moment. I have always loved a good smoothie but I am sure you'll be sick of them once you are through.
    I am happy you are trusting in the journey that you were meant to travel and listening to your body. I will be praying all goes the way it is suppose to and for your strength and courage to deal with it all. Always thinking of you whether I am on here or not. Love and light xxoo
    Butterfly xxoo

  11. #251
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,146

    Default

    Hi Michelle,

    Getting there!!! Get excited for Pete's sake. Bleh to picking up the cigs again. It is what it is. You know much better than I the half life of those subs so please don't let your anxiety get the better of you. Don't look for trouble (symptoms) and just maybe you won't find them. Stay positive and keep reminding yourself that for folks jumping for good at that dose the first few days aren't bad. Right? Right.

    I kind of hope you set the subs aside for good and taper or jump from the short acting opiates when it's time. But that's me. Whatever you decide you know that I'll support you. We'll deal with that later on. One thing at a time!!!

    Peace,

    Cat

  12. #252
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,146

    Default

    Michelle,

    How you doing? Tomorrow is D day, right? I'll be thinking of you. Be sure to check in when you can. I see you posting on new threads and I'm so glad that you and Ming are stepping up. I do my best but this advice really needs to come from folks like you. Your most recent post explaining that subs aren't as evil as some may make out if they are used correctly is so important. I often forget to mention that so thanks for the reminder! I'll try to be better about it.

    I've been around here long enough to see folks come and go and I can't blame them...life goes on. I am just ever go grateful for this Forum and its constant reminder of where I was and how far I've come. I am absolutely certain that I wouldn't have made it without my Forum Family. To say that I was hopeless isn't a strong enough statement. This is so important to say here because no matter how deep anyone is, if you climb just one minute at a time you can get there. There are difficult moments and even days but that's life in general, isn't it? Much of this I have found is finding the right support and just having a total mind do-over. Call the "whispers" a craving because that's what it is. Stop tip toeing around all that goes on in our crazy heads. To this day, if I'm a bit off the mark I just stop whatever I'm doing and evaluate what is bothering me and then make a decision to do something about it or let it go. There is rarely an in-between.

    I am excited for you, Michelle. You have come such a long way and have become so much stronger than you ever imagined you could be. There are no regrets, just lessons and we continue to learn them every morning when we wake up breathing. Please be sure to keep us posted.

    Much peace to you, my friend,

    Cat

  13. #253
    Anonymous Guest

    Default Last day before surgery

    I'm getting excited/anxious/nervous/crazy and everything inbetween. When you know your doing the right thing, but you know that right thing is going to cause pain, and discomfort it's terrifying. This "right thing" is going to put me in the line of fire against my greatest enemy. There is no getting around surgery and medications. But how I handle those medications after the fact is what counts. I've struggled with addiction for 15yrs, so I'm going into this surgery with eyes wide open, the hope of not getting back on subs, and be done with it all for good!
    My journey has been long and difficult on my family, my psyche, and my body. This surgery is an elective one and one that some may say is the easy way out. I am here to say, it's far from easy, and I haven't even hit the hard part yet! Gastric sleeve surgery is not an easy fix. The road may be quicker than dieting and exercise, but I need a quicker fix to allow me to have a back surgery that was the route cause of my addiction to start with.
    Many people can relate to the story. You have pain from an accident or injury, you start taking pain meds and we're off to the races. It didn't take me long to get hooked. I was going through a very difficult time in my life and I think many people just felt sorry for me. Doctors included. I'm not going to get into my "difficult time" because it's not an excuse for addiction.
    What I am going to get into is how I'm choosing to live my life now. This surgery represents my dedication to my health. How I'm willing to go to extreme lengths to get it back.
    After getting my pills under control, I let my new addiction take hold without even realizing it. Food, was my new high. Instead of taking care of my health then, I let my health and my weight spiral. I thought "well as long as I'm not taking pills I'm ok" but I was still far from ok.
    I had to work through many, many issues to get to this point in my life, and I'm still not done working through those issues, but I think by getting some of this excess weight off, getting my back fixed and making my new way a life a whole body/mind process, I might just be on the right path.
    So, tomorrow on St. Patrick's Day, I'm hoping to get lucky. . With a little luck and a whole lot of work and dedication, I'm hoping for a do-over. I feel like my life is just beginning. This time, I'm hoping to do it right.
    Blessings to all,
    Michelle
    ItsPossible likes this.

  14. #254
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,146

    Default

    Good gravy Michelle! We will only stop working through issues when we don't wake up. We all have issues without exception. Some worse than others. That's a part of the beauty of life ever evolving. Sometimes we don't have choices in life so where we can take control we ought to. What we can day to day to become stronger and a better piece of humanity. That's my goal and it's actually pretty simple. Do the right thing as often as we can and accept that we make mistakes. Sometimes HUGE mistakes. My motto post detox is to live life without regret. I'm working on it.

    Peace,

    Cat

  15. #255
    ItsPossible is offline Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    347

    Default

    Hey hun,
    Stopping by to wish you love and light tomorrow. You've worked hard for this day. We are all so proud of you and I am positive you will deal with it with a plan in mind and keep your eyes on your goals.
    I have loved chatting with you these last few months and am grateful you've encouraged me with your words as much as you have.
    Praying for your recovery!
    Love and light,
    Kim xxoo

  16. #256
    Anonymous Guest

    Default I'm back

    Hi everybody!!!! I made it. I just got home from hospital. With minimal pain. I don't know if it's still the the anesthesia, but what ever it is I'll take it.

    My hubby is taking such good care of me. I can only have little mini cups of water and clear liquids and he has them all lined up on the counter making sure I'm drinking them. What a God send he is! I can't wait to get off my medications. I'm only taking minimal amounts of of the liquid oxycodone, and tylenol, but I've been home for 8 hrs and only had 1 dose. I could have up to every four hrs, but so far I've made it with only one. Hoping to keep it down like that till I can get rid of the bottle for good!

    I know there is many of you out there fighting on your own. It's so hard to open up to someone, but if you can find that someone, it takes such a weight off you shoulders. Just to know that someone is there with you, can make all the difference in the world. If there isn't anyone then you know you always have people here on this forum to help. ALWAYS!!

    I am committed to my plan of just getting of the opiates and not returning to subs. Gonna need the help of all my peeps if your out there!
    preparing for the fight to the light!!

    Blessings to all and thank you for you well wishes. Surgery...check.. and on to the next step!!

    Michelle
    xxoo
    Gonnawin and ItsPossible like this.

  17. #257
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,146

    Default

    Hey!!!!!

    Been thinking of you and was hoping you'd be by with an update. You're going to do this right. I know you will. No turning back now. No Way!!!! Listen to your body instead of the clock. Bleh! You know the drill. Whatever you do now you will do because it's best for your long term plan. Subs be gone!! Praying for you that's true.

    I'm so happy you're well and back.

    Peace,

    Cat

  18. #258
    Anonymous Guest

    Default

    Cat... Keep me in line girl. Gonna need your guidance... I know the pressure!!!

    I've got a good thoughts for a good path!

    Thanks Cat
    Michelle
    xxoo

  19. #259
    ItsPossible is offline Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    347

    Default

    Hey Michelle,
    So happy that you are home and in recovery phase. Sending a big high five to hubby for the love he is showing our trooper!
    Hoping this message finds you well. In my prayers love!
    Kim xxoo

  20. #260
    Anonymous Guest

    Default Can get off this liquid Oxy soon Help me!

    Okay, so I think I'm good with pain control right now. I can take tylenol extra strength, but that really doesn't help me. (can't take advil for 3 months!! eek) My question is right now I'm ok on 5ml of Oxycodone liquid, BUT and this is a big but, I also have this underlying demon. The zubsolv. (or subs) I've been taking 6mgs per day before my surgery. I wan't off the subs. Anybody want to take a crack at a taper plan for me just using the oxy?

    michelle

  21. #261
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2015
    Posts
    2,086

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by rockandhardplace View Post
    Okay, so I think I'm good with pain control right now. I can take tylenol extra strength, but that really doesn't help me. (can't take advil for 3 months!! eek) My question is right now I'm ok on 5ml of Oxycodone liquid, BUT and this is a big but, I also have this underlying demon. The zubsolv. (or subs) I've been taking 6mgs per day before my surgery. I wan't off the subs. Anybody want to take a crack at a taper plan for me just using the oxy?

    michelle
    Hey Michelle
    That your new plan? Cat seems like the most knowledgable person about pill detox. But she got off pills cold turkey.
    You've tried tapering opiates before. Why the change of heart, if i may ask?

  22. #262
    Anonymous Guest

    Default

    I'm feeling very overwhelmed today. My emotions are all over the place. Concerned about getting off this oxy. I don't want to have to get back on the subs. I know I've tried tapering opiates before. But it feels like this oxy I'm on isn't as strong or something. I don't crave it and I don't get high like I did with the didlaudid. So I've actually been reducing on my own. From 5mls every 4 or so hours, to 3mls ever 6-8 hrs. I really really think I can do it this time. I was def in getting high mode with the dilaudid. I don't know, but now I'm getting nervous because the bottle is dwindling. I can take the pain, but I'd rather not do w/d's. So starting tomorrow I think I'm going to try going all day without it and see what happens. I get my drainage tube out tomorrow, also the 12 million staples they put in me. My stomach looks like dr. Frankenstien worked on it.
    Oh yeah, as I'm writing, I'm just realizing...tube out, staples out. Maybe might have to take one dose before my appt.
    We will see how it goes. I know I shouldn't be working myself up in a tizzy. That's the worst thing to do. So any words of encouragement would be sooooo welcomed.
    Blessings, hoping this day finds everyone a little peace
    Shelly

  23. #263
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2014
    Posts
    3,107

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by rockandhardplace View Post
    Okay, so I think I'm good with pain control right now. I can take tylenol extra strength, but that really doesn't help me. (can't take advil for 3 months!! eek) My question is right now I'm ok on 5ml of Oxycodone liquid, BUT and this is a big but, I also have this underlying demon. The zubsolv. (or subs) I've been taking 6mgs per day before my surgery. I wan't off the subs. Anybody want to take a crack at a taper plan for me just using the oxy?

    michelle


    Hello Michelle,

    I know I seemed to have disappeared, but I'm still around, just really needed some extended time off. Sorry I haven't been here to offer some assistance, but let me give you my views on what you may want to consider doing about getting off the pain meds. I read your post to Ming and it made me sad that you said no one was around any longer. So sorry you feel that way.

    I know you really don't want to go back on the subs (Zubsolv) and I really believe this is the perfect time to make that happen. You don't need them any longer. What I would do (if you can) is to continue tapering the liquid Oxy down to as low as dose as possible. Take it slow you so can keep the wd symptoms to a minimum. Maybe reduce by 1 or 2 ml every 4 - 5 or so days would be fine. By the time you get off the worst of the surgery pain should have subsided. Hard to taper liquid sometimes, but if you do your best you can do it I know.

    Like getting off any opiate it takes willpower of epic proportions to be successful with a taper. Many have accomplished it and so can you.

    I happy you are through that surgery and you sure seem happy. New you, new life. The possibilities are endless!

    Randy
    Ming23 likes this.

  24. #264
    ItsPossible is offline Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    347

    Default

    Hi Michelle,
    I do not know how to help you taper but I here for emotional support.
    Things just have been crazy lately and it is starting to settle down... for everyone I believe there is some magnificent change occurring, so it being slow around here won't last.
    Remember to follow your heart when choosing what is best. Ask for help in prayer as well.. for guidance and support. Sit in stillness and listen. That is what I am going to do.. take my own advice lol
    Sweet dream Michelle, check back in tomorrow xxoo
    love and light
    Butterfly xxoo

  25. #265
    Anonymous Guest

    Default

    Randy,
    1st of let me say that I'm so sorry for the loss of your brother. It's good to know that his "whole" family was together for his passing, as I'm sure it gave him, and all of you much needed peace.

    I would of never bothered you, during this time, but I'm honored that you took time to come to the rescue. I know Ming had asked me why my taper would be any easier this time, where I failed the last time. Well, I think it has to do with the oxy. I just don't seem to crave it AT ALL. I know it sounds crazy, but as soon as I got home from the hospital I had my guard up. The script said to take 5-10 ml every 4 hrs. I didn't even bother to be a clock watcher this time so, I started on the 5ml every 5-6 sometimes 8 hrs. I couldn't believe it. I stayed on the 5 ml for only the first couple days, then dropped to only 3ml. Most times only taking it 2-3 day.

    So, my question is since I stopped taking my subs (6mgs day) on March 15th is it possible that I might have slightly less w/d's or that it might be out of my system?? (haha probably wishful thinking) I still have approx.150mls of the oxy left, so I'm going to make another drop tomorrow, maybe 1-2mls and only take it if it's absolutely needed. Unfortunately the tylenol is no longer working for me, so if at the time I run out of the oxy and I'm still having pain, they said they could wright me a script for codeine.

    Would love to get your input in all that. I'm only a wk out of surgery and still having my moments with pain, but have been really just trying to grin and bear it, something I never would of done before. It feels like I've turned a corner, but of course still have the fears of the unknown. I'm not letting my guard down for 1 min. and even starting the ball rolling on my back surgery. Which could be done as soon as July. lol

    I want my life back in the worst way. I want to be off any and all drugs, with a body that's not so heavy and back pain that keeps me from interacting in all the things I used to love to do.
    You have been doing this for a long time, so I would really value your opinion. I know you wont sugar coat things either.
    .
    Your dedication to this site never goes unnoticed, the time and energy, and care that you give to people is second to none. You are the heart and soul of what keeps this site going, even when your not around, we always know your heart is with us. Thank you Randy for all that you do, just in case someone hasn't told you that lately. Not that you need or want any praise, but I need to selfishly let you know that.

    Blessing to you that you will find some peace and that you and your family remain strong for each other.
    Shelly (Changing the name to a lighter version of Michelle. lol)
    xxoo
    Last edited by Anonymous; 03-25-2016 at 05:59 PM.

  26. #266
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2015
    Posts
    2,086

    Default

    Good morning Shelly
    I see Randy texted you. Yay!
    Not that it matters, but i agree with both of you about not resuming subs if u can possibly reduce dose using the liquid oxy. It's what I would do for myself.
    You sound better about not watching the clock. Throw the clock out!
    The mental part is tough but you've been through this before and u know what's at stake. Here's a great opportunity to get off the merry go round.
    Yes, i think there's still subs in you. March 15 is only 2 weeks ago and the subs stay around for a bit. But the longer u don't take them, the less will be in you.
    You're doing great Shelly! Fighting for your life!
    Proud of you and confident you can do this!
    Hang in there!
    Catrina likes this.

  27. #267
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,146

    Default

    Good Morning!

    I'm sorry I guess I missed you yesterday. I am glad though that Randy posted to you and he and Ming both agree now is your time! Don't let your head get in your way. This is the perfect time to leave the subs behind. Didn't sound like yesterday went well for you. Perhaps it is still the sub messing with you. Only two weeks ago since your last dose, right so you're getting there. All the more reason to reduce the oxy as slowly as you can. You said you could get codeine? A step in the right direction. Still an opiate but not as strong as oxy but who knows?

    What do they say? Oh yeah. One day at a time. We all know that tapering can mess with you so just go slow but steady allowing the remaining sub to leave while you're reducing the oxy. We also all know the lower you can go with the oxy, the easier it will be on you at the end.

    Now, go find that positive attitude. Remember too, that as you begin to feel better you can become more active. I know with your back you won't be running marathons just yet (Boy! I know it!) but get up and around as best you can. Shake yourself and find that positive attitude again. We love you!

    Peace,

    Cat

  28. #268
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,146

    Default

    Lost an entire paragraph! Grrrrr

    Stop worrying about that bottle. It can begin to look like a time bomb! Where are you at right now? I think around 25mg/day? I'm quite sure you've got a bit of time before the sub is completely gone. Stop trying to figure out what is making you feel how. It just is. Maybe instead of reducing each dose to 3mg, try staying at 5mg but drop one dose per day? Bleh! You get what I mean. Try to keep your goal to reducing your daily intake to a certain amount doing it whichever way works best for you. Five 3mg doses during the day and a 5mg dose at night? It will all add up to the same thing. If you rush it, there's more danger of taking a little more, just this once and we know how that goes. Much better to do it slowly enough that you can stick to it. I should have just said that in the first place because that is the bottom line.

    Peace,

    Cat

  29. #269
    Anonymous Guest

    Default

    Cat...Talk about grrr losing your paragraph, I lost a whole lonnnnnng post to butterfly about some issue's I'd been having with my dad..If you want to call him that. Anyway not going there. Waste of my energy anyway!!
    Cat.. how are you feeling. Is your back giving you any issue? I had my 1st appt. yesterday with the bariatric doc. He took that disgusting drainage tube out and all the staples. Felt like Dr. Frankenstien worked on me. Did you have staples at all? I know I'm asking my back doc about that!!

    Anyway, I feel pretty good not having a hose hampering my love life, ya know what I'm saying??

    I have 150 ml left in my oxy bottle and I'm really going to stretch it out as far as I can. Then off I go!!
    The subs aren't even an option anymore. Once I'm off the oxy, whatever I gotta do to make it through, I'm going to do!

    Working hard on my diet and Tuesday I'm going to call my back doc and get things rolling with him. You know how long it takes to get the surgery process underway. The bariatric doc said 3 months would be time to shoot for the surgery, so I'm going to make that happen.

    What are you doing for Easter? I think having those grandkids cook you a nice dinner would be great!
    Anyway just wanted to say hi, thinking about your recovery and hoping your kicking little bit of booty!!

    I'm having a good day today, just for today right? Hoping you'll be helping me along on my not so good days, which I know I'll have.

    Blessings to you and your family for a wonderful Easter!!
    Shelly (changing the name, because it's a lighter version of michelle) lol
    xxoo
    Last edited by Anonymous; 03-26-2016 at 08:28 AM.

  30. #270
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,146

    Default

    Hi Shelly.

    Welcome! No staples for back and I doubt you'll have them either. The incision is maybe a couple inches long. Hard for me to see. They were regular stitches that were held in place with steri strips. Do you know what those are? They're thin pieces of surgical tape that were placed closely together across the incision (incision vertical, tape horizontal) and then a dressing placed over it. I was able to remove the dressing after I guess around 36 hrs after the surgery. They said I could shower right away and that the tape would fall off but to not pull it off. It did. Took a couple of weeks. No suture removal they are dissolving if not already dissolved. Easy breezy.

    Glad you're doing better. Determination! Just think about how close you are to not be counting, measuring. The whole awful process. You're going to get through it this time. Back and forth with subs. UGH! "Just say No".

    Peace,

    Cat

Page 9 of 11 FirstFirst ... 7891011 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Coming off for good
    By Chjohnson in forum Suboxone Treatment
    Replies: 52
    Last Post: 07-16-2016, 08:33 AM
  2. Coming off benzos and opiates
    By little_engine in forum Prescription Drug Addiction
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 12-28-2014, 12:06 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22