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Day 11 of no suboxone. Looking for info.
  1. #451
    10years39days is offline Member
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    I've posted my thread titled "Suboxone Jump - I'm Taking My Life Back"

  2. #452
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Good Morning my friend.
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  3. #453
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Good morning all. I went to my first meeting last night and I gotta say I was disappointed. 95% of the people there were there by court order and nobody was taking it seriously. So I just sat in the back and kept my mouth shut and waited for it to end. I mean it was my first meeting but even I knew it was amateur hour. It was like something out of a bad movie. But I will not get discouraged, I will find one that is right for me. I have a co worker getting me a more comprehensive list of meetings in the area. He told me that a lot of the meetings are like that up here because of the drug court program, and m3th is a real big problem up here so people just don't take it seriously. Kinda disheartening but that's life. I'll find one that suits me.

    Other than that it's been a good week. Got my Christmas shopping done. Got a Christmas party to go to today after work, tried to make my homemade toffee yesterday. Buuuuut I bought cr.a.p.p.y. butter and when I was cooking it separated from the sugar as it was boiling. Amateur mistake. I know better! Grrrrrr. Shame shame beef. It still tastes good and nobody will know the difference but me but I'm disappointed in myself. I usually make it every Christmas and give my employees a little mason jar of candy. So I'll try again and see if I can redeem myself. K has been having some stomach issues and we had to make a doctor's appt for her. So we'll see what happens there. It's about time for her checkup anyways just to make sure she's still in remission. So I'm sure I'll be a little anxious over the next week or so. I'll keep everyone updated and let you know how it goes. Hope everyone has a great day!!

    Rainy as h.e.l.l. up here. Gotta find my poncho!

    Beef
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  4. #454
    DravenDomnq is offline Advanced Member
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    Hey Beef, I'm really glad you got out to check out a meeting, and sorry it wasn't what you were looking for. It took me a bit to find the right fit for me, so I'm glad you're getting a list of others. Hopefully you'll find some that are beneficial because I know how much of a difference they've made in my recovery. We have a very similar huge problem here, so I get it, but don't give up!!

    Hope everything checks out ok with K, will be sending lots of positive thoughts!! Have a good day my friend!

    ~Snags some of that toffee while you're not looking~

  5. #455
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beefaroni7272 View Post
    Good morning all. I went to my first meeting last night and I gotta say I was disappointed. 95% of the people there were there by court order and nobody was taking it seriously. So I just sat in the back and kept my mouth shut and waited for it to end. I mean it was my first meeting but even I knew it was amateur hour. It was like something out of a bad movie. But I will not get discouraged, I will find one that is right for me. I have a co worker getting me a more comprehensive list of meetings in the area. He told me that a lot of the meetings are like that up here because of the drug court program, and m3th is a real big problem up here so people just don't take it seriously. Kinda disheartening but that's life. I'll find one that suits me.

    Other than that it's been a good week. Got my Christmas shopping done. Got a Christmas party to go to today after work, tried to make my homemade toffee yesterday. Buuuuut I bought cr.a.p.p.y. butter and when I was cooking it separated from the sugar as it was boiling. Amateur mistake. I know better! Grrrrrr. Shame shame beef. It still tastes good and nobody will know the difference but me but I'm disappointed in myself. I usually make it every Christmas and give my employees a little mason jar of candy. So I'll try again and see if I can redeem myself. K has been having some stomach issues and we had to make a doctor's appt for her. So we'll see what happens there. It's about time for her checkup anyways just to make sure she's still in remission. So I'm sure I'll be a little anxious over the next week or so. I'll keep everyone updated and let you know how it goes. Hope everyone has a great day!!

    Rainy as h.e.l.l. up here. Gotta find my poncho!

    Beef


    Hey Beef -

    Good job going to that meeting. Sorry it didn't work out. Please don't let it discourage you one bit as that happens. You'll find one that's right for you. It may take going to a few, but sooner or later you'll know when you've found a home. And don't rule out AA either. Same 12 steps, just a different substance.

    Hope K gets to feeling better. And if you need help with the baking just let me know....I'll send Lvg over!

    Randy

  6. #456
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Thanks Randy, and Draven. It felt good even though I had to laugh about the meeting. From reading everyone's posts about the subject, I know ive read from I think it was you Randy that said you may have to go to multiple meeting until you find the right fit. I will be back and find one that's right for me. I owe it to myself to go and see it through. Thanks for all the support!!! You guys are great!!!

    Beef
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  7. #457
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Hey see I missed alot hmmm. Proud of You for making it to a meeting. Don't let that deter you everything you are feeling and thinking I did to my first meeting was awful Beef but believe me today was the best decision I made to keep going. Go in with an open mind my friend just listen you might get what you need. One suggestion sit in the front with the winner's. Hope K is feeling better.
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  8. #458
    10years39days is offline Member
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    Great job, Beef! I strive to be in your shoes...or rain boots.

  9. #459
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Hey Beef -

    Good job going to that meeting. Sorry it didn't work out. Please don't let it discourage you one bit as that happens. You'll find one that's right for you. It may take going to a few, but sooner or later you'll know when you've found a home. And don't rule out AA either. Same 12 steps, just a different substance.

    Hope K gets to feeling better. And if you need help with the baking just let me know....I'll send Lvg over!

    Randy

    Hahahaha Randy I just saw that I was thinking I was sneaking over with Draven to get a jar full if candy...
    ***no apple pie no candy***
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  10. #460
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Lol! Thanks lvg. It was interesting to say the least. But I will be back at another one. Definitely gonna stick with it. Like I said earlier I owe it to myself and the girls to see this through and keep the beast in check. I have no desire to ever use again, but that isn't recovery. I got some work to do and some demons to address before I'm better. Meetings have helped so many here so I figured why not. Gotta give it a whirl and see what all the fuss is about. Can't thank all of you guys for all the support and wisdom you have all given me. It's been an amazing journey and it's just getting started!!

    You guys are amazing!!!
    Thank god every day I found this place!
    Beef
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  11. #461
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Oh yeah, K is feeling much better today. But we still gotta get her checked out. It's that time of year, just gotta make sure she's still in the clear. I'll keep everyone updated. Have a great night all!!

    Beef
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  12. #462
    GoodDaysAhead is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Randy35 View Post
    Hey Beef -

    Good job going to that meeting. Sorry it didn't work out. Please don't let it discourage you one bit as that happens. You'll find one that's right for you. It may take going to a few, but sooner or later you'll know when you've found a home. And don't rule out AA either. Same 12 steps, just a different substance.

    Hope K gets to feeling better. And if you need help with the baking just let me know....I'll send Lvg over!

    Randy
    Wow Randy. Bad...bad boy
    You know what? You’re okay in my book
    Sry Lvg lol

  13. #463
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Morning Beef, how are things going with you today?

  14. #464
    froggy_069 is offline Member
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    Just hopping through to say hey!

    Hope all is well my friend!
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  15. #465
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Where's the cake?
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  16. #466
    Forceout is offline Member
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    Hey Beef,

    Hang in there with the meeting search. 20 years ago, I got lucky on my first one! I sat out in my car scared and shy watching everyone in my rear view going in the building. One of the last guy's turned and walked toward me......I remember nearly taking off but he yelled "are you just gonna sit here or come in". That guy was Steve and he became my sponsor. I cried in my chair that night as they welcomed me one at a time with hugs and "I'm glad you're here" and "keep coming back". I was 30 days clean and desperate to stay that way. Thanks to those wonderful people, and my higher power, God, I did stay clean for 15 yrs after junking for 10 or 12.

    Until I broke my knee. You know that story.

    Anyway, you will know when you hit the right one. And they will be so dang lucky to get you!!!

    Forceout

  17. #467
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Hey guys. Happy Friday!! Hope all is well in your neck of the woods. So we took K to the hospital last night because her stomach still wasn't getting much better. They did a bunch of blood work, blah, blah insert medical jargon here. But come to find out she has the pregnancy hormone?? Its higher than normal, but not as high as they would think for being pregnant. So he wants to wait 2 weeks and do another ultrasound. A year and a half ago she had a complete hysterectomy after cervical cancer. I didn't even think it was possible after all she has been through. Doc said its about a 1 in 8,000,000 chance but it does happen. He said if it is what it is they can move it somewhere and attach it and everything will be fine. Its a bit of a shock to the system but a good shock. A GREAT shock actually. We're just gonna take it a day at a time and see what happens. (Sounds eerily familiar) I'm trying not to get too hopeful but I just had to share. Still a lot of issues to work out, and see if it is what it is. Even with a cold K looked amazing, smiling and really glowing (I know it's a cliche but I saw it.) So here I sit, about to start work today and I can't wipe this smile off my face!!! Gonna be another good day today!

    Just wanted to share, don't wanna get my hopes up and gonna take it slow and one appointment at a time and see what happens. Hope everyone has a great day!!

    I'm sure I'll be back later.
    Beef

  18. #468
    froggy_069 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beefaroni7272 View Post
    Hey guys. Happy Friday!! Hope all is well in your neck of the woods. So we took K to the hospital last night because her stomach still wasn't getting much better. They did a bunch of blood work, blah, blah insert medical jargon here. But come to find out she has the pregnancy hormone?? Its higher than normal, but not as high as they would think for being pregnant. So he wants to wait 2 weeks and do another ultrasound. A year and a half ago she had a complete hysterectomy after cervical cancer. I didn't even think it was possible after all she has been through. Doc said its about a 1 in 8,000,000 chance but it does happen. He said if it is what it is they can move it somewhere and attach it and everything will be fine. Its a bit of a shock to the system but a good shock. A GREAT shock actually. We're just gonna take it a day at a time and see what happens. (Sounds eerily familiar) I'm trying not to get too hopeful but I just had to share. Still a lot of issues to work out, and see if it is what it is. Even with a cold K looked amazing, smiling and really glowing (I know it's a cliche but I saw it.) So here I sit, about to start work today and I can't wipe this smile off my face!!! Gonna be another good day today!

    Just wanted to share, don't wanna get my hopes up and gonna take it slow and one appointment at a time and see what happens. Hope everyone has a great day!!

    I'm sure I'll be back
    later.

    Beef
    Wow beef, that is definitely something! I had no clue that was even possible. I won't get too ahead of myself here but I'm so psyched for you!

    Definitely take it slow like you said, one
    appointment at a time and keep us posted!

    Christmas miracle?
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  19. #469
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Default Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

    Hey Beef -

    Just wanted to wish you a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Thank you for the post on my thread. I really appreciate you taking the time and saying what you did. You're a very welcome member of these forums Beef. So glad you joined and have stuck around to provide help and support to those asking for it.

    Merry Christmas Buddy,

    Randy

  20. #470
    10years39days is offline Member
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    My jaw is laying on the floor. Pregnancy without a uterus? Ovaries? I’m keeping my fingers crossed for you guys!
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  21. #471
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Thanks guys. From what I understand is that she still has her ovaries. But the rest of the plumbing is gone. She still produces eggs but hasn't had a menstrual cycle since the surgery. Apparently its called an abdominal pregnancy and it does come with risks both to the baby and mother. Without the uterus the baby creates its own sack to develop in. But once the baby gets a bit larger depending on where it is they have to go in and surgically place it somewhere in the abdomen where it won't grow and press on anything important. So there's a lot of hurdles to overcome obviously. And if the baby comes to term then it's a normal c-section. Lotta if's and maybe's. So don't wanna get too ahead of myself now. Just trying to stay optimistic and take it slow and we'll see what happens.

    Beef
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  22. #472
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Hi my friend, my prayers are with you and k.
    Have a blessed holiday..
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  23. #473
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Thanks lvg. I appreciate it. Trying not to get too ahead of myself here, because after looking it up on the internet I saw how rare and complicated it is. So we'll just take it slow and see what happens. I did play the lotto yesterday though. I figured 1 in 8,000,000 odds is pretty lucky. So I figured why not double down and try my luck again??? Lol. Anyways, have a great Holidays my friend!!
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  24. #474
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Guess who's in green today....

  25. #475
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Wow. I forgot its Sunday. Been a crazy day here. Had some pipes burst last night so the landlord has been at the house all day trying to fix it. I guess no power with the snow ruptured them and when it got warm they expanded. You know the drill. Couldn't run water through the pipes cause no power to pump from the well. Grrrr. Got water now but need to replace hot water heater. So I'll get to do that with him tomorrow. Merry Christmas huh!!!! Closed for x-ma's tomorrow so get to do inventory tonight. I'm all messed up right now. I gotta see how bad my boy's are doing. Be back in a few. How's the mean green doing so far??
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  26. #476
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Of course we're losing!!! Why would I expect anythingelse. 12-9 so who knows. We shall see. There's always second half right?
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  27. #477
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    I'll share the tissues...
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  28. #478
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Hey guys. Hope everyone had a great Christmas, and Happy Boxing Day to our neighbors up north!! Had a good laid back Christmas everything was nice. Kid got a bunch of gifts. The big hits we're a Walking dead version of monopoly which we are half way through our first game. Which I'm winning!! No big deal. Ha! Had some flurries on the car when we woke up so I guess we had a white Christmas, but now I'd say it's Brown ish.

    Finally got hot water back and hooked up. So I'm in desperate need of a shower/shave. So that's my next stop. Hope all is well with everyone. A bit cold and it's supposed to get bad around tomorrow night and Thursday. Snow for a couple days off and on. So we will see.

    Have a great day!!
    Beef
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  29. #479
    DravenDomnq is offline Advanced Member
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    Man Beef, got a bit behind in your thread, but what news about K! Will be sending you both all the positive thoughts I possibly can.

    Totes jelly about the Walking Dead monopoly game, so when can I come over and play??
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  30. #480
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Hey Draven. You're always welcome to come over and get a whoopin from me and Lucille. Ha! Its a lot of fun for sure. I'm jelly because one of my managers got a TWD Trivial Pursuit game. So K and I will definately be going over to play that a few times.

    Thanks for the positive vibes. I'll take them. I'm ecstatic right now, but me with my curious nature I started researching the internet to see what's what. And I didn't like what I found. I was reading case studies and there have only been something like 73 documented cases since 1895. And there's a much higher rate of infant and mother mortality, internal bleeding, malformations etc. I know no pregnancy goes according to plan and it's still so early and there are so many things that have to happen before we even think of that. But i gotta say it scared the c.r.a.p. outta me. But K calmed me down. All we can do is wait and see, and I'm not a naturally patient person. Grrrrr. Pretty much it's all up to the discretion of the doctor whether or not to continue or terminate the pregnancy. So she's taking her vitamins and we'll wait till the next visit and see what he says.

    Have a great day big guy!!!
    Beef
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