Page 1 of 31 12311 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 916
Like Tree1281Likes
Day 11 of no suboxone. Looking for info.
  1. #1
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default Day 11 of no suboxone. Looking for info.

    Good morning everyone. A little backstory. I was born and raised in Florida and as anyone knows opiates were pretty easy to come by several years ago. So of course I took them, got hooked and at its worst I was taking 240-300 mg of oxy daily. I got to the point that I hated looking at myself in the mirror. I knew they were killing me and didn't know what to do. The opportunity arose to move to Ga.I moved up here with a long time friend who was struggling with the same problem and had recently been put on suboxone. When I first started taking it I thought it was a wonder drug. Everything was great until I saw the timeline and realized just how screwed I was. I was on 16 mg a day for 4.5 years. The last 6 months I have been tapering myself down to 1mg for the last week. I made the jump off 11 days ago. I have an amazingly supportive fiancee who is behind me all the way although she does bust my balls and tell me I did it to myself. The first 4 days were pure hell! I had everything. If there was a symptom for wd's I had them. Around day 5 I started looking for some help online to stop the maddness. I went to the local health store and got some DL-phenylalanine, and calm advantage. Similar to calm support but not the same. They seem to help a bit. Today is day 11 clean!!! It has been a struggle and I know it is not over but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I can feel the clouds start to lift everyday. Right now I'm mainly dealing with depression, extreme fatigue, insomnia, body chill and I got the hot snakes running through me badly. I wish I did some research wearlier and knew it was only supposed to be a short term solution. My doctor in 5 years did not once try to bring me down in dosage or talk about getting off it eventually. I went and saw my pharmacist yesterday and she told me about magnesium for sleep, and zinc for rls. Last night I got 5 hours of sleep for the first time in a week. I know it's an uphill battle and I have a long way to go, but I was wondering if anyone in or has went through a similar situation could tell me when I will get over the paws hump. The insomnia and fatigue are killing me, and I didn't have any time off from work so I've had to go in everyday. The flu excuse will only last so long. But in the grand scheme of things I can truly say that I am happy that this happened. Without it I would have never moved or met my future wife. She is my world and I don't know how I made it without her in my life. I know I'm starting to ramble on but I have a positive outlook and I know it will get better with time. I just wish it would hurry up. I have a lot of work to do with repairing my brain, neurotransmitters etc. All the bad stuff that comes with multiple years of addiction. Like I said earlier no regrets, now I just gotta pay the piper so to speak. Thanks for listening to my incoherent dribble. I wish everyone nothing but the best and good luck!!

  2. #2
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,100

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Beefaroni7272 View Post
    Good morning everyone. A little backstory. I was born and raised in Florida and as anyone knows opiates were pretty easy to come by several years ago. So of course I took them, got hooked and at its worst I was taking 240-300 mg of oxy daily. I got to the point that I hated looking at myself in the mirror. I knew they were killing me and didn't know what to do. The opportunity arose to move to Ga.I moved up here with a long time friend who was struggling with the same problem and had recently been put on suboxone. When I first started taking it I thought it was a wonder drug. Everything was great until I saw the timeline and realized just how screwed I was. I was on 16 mg a day for 4.5 years. The last 6 months I have been tapering myself down to 1mg for the last week. I made the jump off 11 days ago. I have an amazingly supportive fiancee who is behind me all the way although she does bust my balls and tell me I did it to myself. The first 4 days were pure hell! I had everything. If there was a symptom for wd's I had them. Around day 5 I started looking for some help online to stop the maddness. I went to the local health store and got some DL-phenylalanine, and calm advantage. Similar to calm support but not the same. They seem to help a bit. Today is day 11 clean!!! It has been a struggle and I know it is not over but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I can feel the clouds start to lift everyday. Right now I'm mainly dealing with depression, extreme fatigue, insomnia, body chill and I got the hot snakes running through me badly. I wish I did some research wearlier and knew it was only supposed to be a short term solution. My doctor in 5 years did not once try to bring me down in dosage or talk about getting off it eventually. I went and saw my pharmacist yesterday and she told me about magnesium for sleep, and zinc for rls. Last night I got 5 hours of sleep for the first time in a week. I know it's an uphill battle and I have a long way to go, but I was wondering if anyone in or has went through a similar situation could tell me when I will get over the paws hump. The insomnia and fatigue are killing me, and I didn't have any time off from work so I've had to go in everyday. The flu excuse will only last so long. But in the grand scheme of things I can truly say that I am happy that this happened. Without it I would have never moved or met my future wife. She is my world and I don't know how I made it without her in my life. I know I'm starting to ramble on but I have a positive outlook and I know it will get better with time. I just wish it would hurry up. I have a lot of work to do with repairing my brain, neurotransmitters etc. All the bad stuff that comes with multiple years of addiction. Like I said earlier no regrets, now I just gotta pay the piper so to speak. Thanks for listening to my incoherent dribble. I wish everyone nothing but the best and good luck!!
    Welcome!

    Congratulations on what you've managed to do thus far and Welcome!!

    Yes. There is nothing much you can do aside from what you are already doing. Time is the only great healer and so as the days go on, you will continue to feel better and better but it's a slow process. You jumped from 1mg/day and that's still a hefty dose of sub but you've managed this far so keep it going.

    It seems that you have the exact right mind set to get this done. "No regrets". That's the ticket. What's done is done so it's time to let it go. I had to smile when you said that if you had known how difficult this would be when you first decided to begin sub therapy, you would have made a different decision. Maybe. But maybe not. Let's face it, when we are in that deep and what sounds to be a solution appears, we take it. I know my mind set when I was in that deep was that things couldn't possibly be worse than they already were. So, who knows what you may have decided then and frankly, it doesn't matter now anyway. You've come a long way and that's what counts. As far as your sub doctor goes, your experience is par for the course. Many, if not most, of them believe that sub therapy should be a long term solution. It's what they've been taught by Big Pharma and in reality, they know little to nothing about how subs really work and just how bad it can get by being on large doses for years. You're one of the lucky ones who figured things out for yourself and decided that there has got to be a better way. Good!!

    You also referred to PAWS and asked how long it will last. What you are feeling now isn't PAWS. It's simply the huge build up of sub that has happened over the course of years slowly dissipating as your body detoxes. There are a lot of people who misunderstand what PAWS is and to know that it's really a lot less common than what some people believe. PAWS is the reappearance of withdrawal symptoms weeks or months after you've been completely clean and feeling better. For no apparent reason, some symptoms crop up for what might be a few days or even longer. Sometimes they are mild and sometimes they are a bit more severe but either way, it's hard to understand what's going on when we thought that we were long past having to deal with these symptoms. As I said, it doesn't happen often so don't worry about it. I just wanted to try and explain it.

    It's really hard to guess how long it's going to take you to get past all of the physical stuff. I would guess though that you've got at least a couple weeks more of how you're feeling and longer than that before getting back to 100%. It's a very gradual process. Good days and bad days with the good days becoming more frequent and the bad days gradually becoming not as bad. Slow but there's no way to avoid the process and so it becomes all the more important to try and not look too far into the future. Just get through today. It really is that simple.

    Are you doing anything else to work on your recovery? Have you considered meetings and/or therapy? We all believe that we can do this on our own and perhaps we can but why would we want to when there's help out there just for the asking? Please consider it. The education and support of others both who are new at this recovery stuff as well as the veterans is right there for you if you just walk through the doors.

    Keep posting to let us know how you're doing. My best wishes to you.

    Peace,

    Cat
    Autumnhopes likes this.

  3. #3
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Thanks cat. I really appreciate it. I'll keep posting and let you know how it's going. I gotta get back to work and try to finish the day with a smile. Baby steps and one day at a time. I got this!!!

  4. #4
    CoryFuzz is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Posts
    2

    Default It's all up to you!:)

    Quote Originally Posted by Beefaroni7272 View Post
    Good morning everyone. A little backstory. I was born and raised in Florida and as anyone knows opiates were pretty easy to come by several years ago. So of course I took them, got hooked and at its worst I was taking 240-300 mg of oxy daily. I got to the point that I hated looking at myself in the mirror. I knew they were killing me and didn't know what to do. The opportunity arose to move to Ga.I moved up here with a long time friend who was struggling with the same problem and had recently been put on suboxone. When I first started taking it I thought it was a wonder drug. Everything was great until I saw the timeline and realized just how screwed I was. I was on 16 mg a day for 4.5 years. The last 6 months I have been tapering myself down to 1mg for the last week. I made the jump off 11 days ago. I have an amazingly supportive fiancee who is behind me all the way although she does bust my balls and tell me I did it to myself. The first 4 days were pure hell! I had everything. If there was a symptom for wd's I had them. Around day 5 I started looking for some help online to stop the maddness. I went to the local health store and got some DL-phenylalanine, and calm advantage. Similar to calm support but not the same. They seem to help a bit. Today is day 11 clean!!! It has been a struggle and I know it is not over but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I can feel the clouds start to lift everyday. Right now I'm mainly dealing with depression, extreme fatigue, insomnia, body chill and I got the hot snakes running through me badly. I wish I did some research wearlier and knew it was only supposed to be a short term solution. My doctor in 5 years did not once try to bring me down in dosage or talk about getting off it eventually. I went and saw my pharmacist yesterday and she told me about magnesium for sleep, and zinc for rls. Last night I got 5 hours of sleep for the first time in a week. I know it's an uphill battle and I have a long way to go, but I was wondering if anyone in or has went through a similar situation could tell me when I will get over the paws hump. The insomnia and fatigue are killing me, and I didn't have any time off from work so I've had to go in everyday. The flu excuse will only last so long. But in the grand scheme of things I can truly say that I am happy that this happened. Without it I would have never moved or met my future wife. She is my world and I don't know how I made it without her in my life. I know I'm starting to ramble on but I have a positive outlook and I know it will get better with time. I just wish it would hurry up. I have a lot of work to do with repairing my brain, neurotransmitters etc. All the bad stuff that comes with multiple years of addiction. Like I said earlier no regrets, now I just gotta pay the piper so to speak. Thanks for listening to my incoherent dribble. I wish everyone nothing but the best and good luck!!
    Hey Beef,
    Let me start by saying congratulations on a 6 month taper from an almost 5 year sub addiction! A jump from 1mg is no easy feat as well, its super commendable and you should be very proud of yourself! Dont worry about rambling because any type of self-therapy that isnt drugs is positive, you should ramble every chance you get if it means helping yourself right now, even if no one ever reads it, im about to ramble myself right now Possibly helping someone else is the therapy i need at the moment. Also, everything Catrina said is pretty great, well thought out insight and advice.

    I can go on for hours (I wont) about my frustration and disgust with the way doctors prescribe suboxone, their thought is that its better than steadily increasing a potentially deadly opiate abuse and theyre right, but when it comes to proper dosing and time frames, unless they have unfortunately and fortunately been through this process themselves they are predominantly uninformed and uneducated. Suboxone is in my eyes is best used as a short taper followed by therapy, inpatient care, outpatient care, or a loving relationship dependent on the persons needs. (Congrats on the budding romance

    Its important to know that everyones body and recovery are different and you cant expect exact results from anyone elses experience. You seem to have a pretty good understanding of the damage youve done to your brain and that it needs time to repair itself and it will. My backstory: I have been an on and off addict (90-95% on) for over 15 years now. Habits ranging from a few oxys a day, to 2-3 grams of dogfood a day, to 16mg of sub a day for multi-year stretches. Countless amounts of fully cold turkey withdrawals(congrats again on the cold turkey jump) Brief periods of sobriety after acute withdrawals ranging from a few days to around 6 months. Im only adding my backstory because youre going to hear and read things like "the hardest part is over". The acute withdrawals are HARD, feel endless (especially off suboxone) and are soul crushing, and you are doing amazing! But for me day 11 and the week or two following it, when you start to feel better and normal and like yourself are the deceptively tricky days to make sure that your confidence, normalcy and feelings of having things under control dont make you think that it is ok to put any drugs in your body and that you can handle doing it just once or just twice. Youre clear headed, upbeat outlook right now is exactly where you need to be and need to stay to stave off any thoughts that this would be alright to do.

    Do not let anything get in the way of sobriety!!! Especially yourself. The symptoms that I find linger the longest are sleep patterns, bathroom patterns, RLS(arghhh), depression and depression induced fatigue. All of these things will gradually get better as your body cleans itself and your brain heals. I know you want what we all always want at this point, EXACT TIME FRAMES. The answer you see that it is different for everybody is true but I will give you my best estimate based on my experience.

    Sleep: The fact that you had a night with 5 hours straight of sleep with just vitamins is a great sign! Insomnia induced thoughts should not be listened to! Breath, relax, commit and try to keep your eyes closed for more than 15 seconds (regardless of RLS) before deciding to turn back toward the TV and giving up on sleep. It gradually gets better and will be close to normal in about a month from ur last sub.

    Bathroom: Just keep an extra pair of briefs in the car, 90% of the time it just feels like you have to go. Takes about the same amount of time to almost normal as sleep does.

    RLS/crawling legs: Combined with and also perpetuating insomnia, RLS and sleeplessness together are for me the worst part of withdrawals and the occasional cause of "just one bump of H wont hurt" Do not do it! It feels endless and combined with the complete mind >>>> of no sleep it is enough to drive the sanest of people crazy! Stick it out, it gradually improves and will be usually close to unnoticeable in 2 to 3 weeks. Try running in place with high knees for 10-15 mins a little before bed. Try Hylands RLS relief and Calms Forte together, may help.

    Depression/fatigue: These go together for me. Forcing yourself to get up and going, be as active as you can, physically and mentally. You have a job to keep you busy and a loving fiance to focus on, use it and use her to keep you occupied and positive! A good diet and any natural remedies you can take is a great benefit on this one (and for all these symptoms), especially because just the thought of exercising is usually out of the question for me. But exercise if you can.

    The one thing to look out for with all these symptoms is that even though they steadily and gradually improve there will be a day or two in there over the next month or so where they will seem to have to taken a step in the opposite direction and seem worse, this is extremely momentary and doesnt last more than a day or so, these setbacks get less and less frequent and eventually dissapear. Its just something human bodies do when they heal. Recognize it when it happens, realize how much stronger you are than it, fight through it, dont relapse and I promise you will realize you made the right decision!

    Me and my thumb are getting tired! Thats a true ramble ⬆️!!! The best thing you said was in your second post, put on that smile, "I GOT THIS!!!" You will challenge yourself on that, dont, that is where you need to be and stay. Ignore the setbacks, ignore the cravings, know your brain is healing and cant always be trusted! "YOU GOT THIS!!!"

    Best of luck and success!
    Thanks for listening Cory
    Lvg nghtmare likes this.

  5. #5
    CoryFuzz is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Posts
    2

    Default

    Want to add that im currently 5 weeks clean off a 2g a day dope habit that I used a 10 day short sub taper on. So about 4 weeks clean off everything. Didnt want you to think that I was rambling high. While the best advice often comes from former addicts, its usually unreliable when they are currently high.

    Also, how long were you using before the doc put you on the subs?

  6. #6
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Thanks Cory! That was a great ramble by the way! I'd say I was on the oxy for about 2 years ish. It's hard to say with any degree of certainty because I was basically comatose. About to head into work and today is day 12!!! Couldn't sleep a wink last night. Just tossed and turned. Maybe got two good hours. Was thinking of grabbing some melatonin today after work. Still doing great and just dealing with it. Fatigue is brutal but not terrible today. Got plenty of immodium and just want fo curl up in the bed, but i know ill feel better the more i move around. Have a great day everyone one day at a time!!!s

  7. #7
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Hey guys. Sitting here on lunch break on day 13. I am very very greatful and happy that I've come this far. Tried a bar of Irish spring in the bed with me last night and to my surprise it actually worked. Granted I got about 3-4 two hour naps. But that is so much more sleep than I have been getting. But when I woke up this morning I was more exhausted than the day before. The fatigue and exhaustion are the main things that are getting me now. That and depression. I started crying for no reason last night while watching tv. (Let me tell you, seeing a 6'8" 300 pounder break down in to tears at the drop of a hat is quite a sight i'm sure) My outlook is still good and I know that I'm doing the right thing for me and my family. But I did have that first thought creep into my head that all I have to do is give my doctor a call and schedule a new appt and he will call in a few subos to my pharmacy. I didn't do that of course and I do not plan to. It was just a little disturbing that my mind went there for the first time. I know that constant cravings are gonna be part of the next month for me. I am doing good regardless and still have a bright outlook. I just needed an outlet to vent to. God I hope I get some energy back soon. I don't like moping around, it's so not me. Thanks to all and have a great day!!!

  8. #8
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Day14. About to head into work and I am truly dreading going in. Had a little energy yesterday but didn't sleep too well last night and the chills are not too good today. I'm hoping that once I start moving around it will get better. Truly hate feeling like this butbi know it is only temporary. Hopefully I will be back to my old self in a few more weeks. Depression is a pain in the butt. I know that that too will lift. Time is just a cruel mistress. Telling myself everyday that this is what needs to be done and there is no way around it. Enough is enough. Hope everyone has a great day and God bless.

  9. #9
    zebra1961 is offline Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Posts
    147

    Default

    Beef the tears are normal and will pass I am 5-11 205 so lets keep that our little secret !!! Sleep slowly returns I went 3 weeks on 2 1/2 hrs sleep did not know I could survive but I did, so all these wds you are having are normal. I have great confidence you will make it!!! I jumped at 6-8mgs after 2 1/2 years on subs, been 15 months clean this is wayyyyyyyy better. You will make it you should be past the worst of it. It just takes time so hang tough it slowly gets better. Keep in mind whats coming you before drugs!! I don't want to give a timetable because will all recover differently. keep us updated ask all the questions you want stay strong you got this don't quit!!!
    Lvg nghtmare likes this.

  10. #10
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Thanks zebra. It's really reassuring to hear that. Today is day 16!! Still having trouble sleeping although I am still not able to sleep through the night. I know that I've still got some time before I'm through all of this. But it seems like my sleep is limited to a few naps a night. Which will work for now still way better than only getting maybe an hour a night. The ela seems to be getting better. Still battling the depression and depression induced fatigue. I'd give anything to feel like I have some energy. It seems like whatever I do 30 minutes later it feels like I ran a marathon. All things considering I feel ok. Stomach is still a little uneasy, and still have diarrhea. Just waiting for all this >>>> to be over. Taking it one day at a time and trying to keep a positive outlook. But I feel like I'm letting my family down because whenever I get home all I ever want to do is curl up on the couch or in bed. I know it will pass in time and I know this is way better than the alternative but I'm just so exhausted all the time. Thanks for listening everyone. Heading into work in about an hour. Not looking forward to it, but I gotta fake it till I make it. Have a great day all.
    UncleLeo likes this.

  11. #11
    Jgray19896 is offline Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2017
    Posts
    126

    Default

    Good for you man! Stay the course and don't look back! I'm getting really close to my jump point and love reading these success stories. Keep up the good work and just remember that you made the right choice! Hope you keep updating so we all can admire your willpower and progress. Hang in there!!

    J

  12. #12
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Hey guys. Today is day 18!!! I feel better but I just can't get any energy at all. All I want to do is just go and sit down or curl up in bed. It's killing me. I just want to be back to my old self but I know it's a process and it will take time. I just want it to hurry up and get here. I don't like feeling like this. It's just frustrating. But I know how I felt on day 5 so I know this is better. Still taking it a step at a time. But I just want to get some good sleep and have a little bit of energy. Tried a 5 hour energy and it did nothing for me. Oh well. I shoulda guessed it wouldn't be that easy. Have a great day all. See you tomorrow.

  13. #13
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    3,306

    Default

    Hello Beefaroni, Congratulations day 18 good job.. oh no motivation and lethargy I know that well I had a rough time with that. The best thing is keep moving excersise walk just stay active. Walking to the mailbox for me felt like a 5k run...walk around the house just keep the mind active I can tell you like others here told me This to Shall Pass... keep reading and posting.. Stay Strong for Today..

  14. #14
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Thanks nightmare!!! Got through the day. It's been rough. Work was tough today. Really busy. I'd work for about an hour and feel like I ran a marathon. But I made it!! Gotta celebrate the small victories. Still have a good outlook. And so proud of myself for sticking with it. Not outta the woods yet. But I can see the light. Days and night's are getting better every day. Thanks to everyone for all the help and support. Wouldn't have come this far without you guys. Thank you all so much!!!!

  15. #15
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    3,306

    Default

    Proud of You to Beef, stay positive it gets easier as you rack up the clean days..be well.. Stay Strong for Today..

  16. #16
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Day 19. Tough waking up this morning. Tossed and turned all night. Not really sure how much sleep I got. Chills and stomach issues seem to have gone backwards a day. I guess that's normal though. I really just want one night where I can get a full 8 hours. I love my sleep and miss it terribly!! I know it will pass and all that good stuff. I just really want it to break and give me some energy, and some sleep. It's brutal. Have a great day all. Gotta get to work. Ugh.
    Lvg nghtmare likes this.

  17. #17
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Work was pretty busy today and it forced me to be active and move around a lot. Gotta say it helped. Took some Imodium and I'm good. Feel much better than this morning. Still want to just go to sleep but I feel like I have a little more energy. Last post I feel like I was whining a little bit and stomping my feet like an 8 year old child. This is one of the toughest things I've ever had to do. I'm doing it for all the right reasons. I just gotta keep reminding myself that. Thanks for listening and have a great day.

  18. #18
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    3,306

    Default

    Your doing awesome..just keep doing the next right thing... keeping active helps the healing process..ohh I whined for months we are all here to support you... Stay Strong for Today..

  19. #19
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Day 20!! Felt really lethargic this morning but grabbed a hot shower and headed into work. I think I got about 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep last night woke up at 2am and couldn't fall back asleep. But the 5 hours is definately a win. I'll take it. Feeling better than I did an hour ago. We will see where the day takes me. I just gotta do what I can and keep moving. Got a little depression and anxiety, but I guess that's par for the course. So ready for the chills to be done with, nothing is overwhelming just slightly annoying. Looking back I'd say I feel about 50 % better than I did a week ago. So I just gotta keep reminding myself of where I was and even though this can be annoying and frustrating it's a heck of a lot better than where I was. Staying strong! Gotta take it a day at a time. I'm sure a week from now I'll look back and say the same thing. Thank you all for the kind words and the support. Would not have come this far without all of you!! Have a great day everyone!!!!
    Lvg nghtmare likes this.

  20. #20
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Hey guys today is day 21!! Woke up ( that's a laugh) only got 1.5 hours of sleep last night. And got up with super depression. Just feel like there's a rain cloud following me around today. It is brutal. Exhaustion is killing me. When I got 5 hours the previous night I thought I had turned the corner but I guess not. Still know I'm doing this for all the right reasons and I have no desire to go back. I've made it 3weeks I will see it through. Can someone recommend something to help me get some sleep. I'll try anything at this point. Someone offered me a muscle relaxer but I don't want to go down that road. I'm open to all suggestions. Anything to help me sleep a little bit will be so welcomed. Thanks to all and have a great day.
    Catrina likes this.

  21. #21
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    So sitting here in my office on day 21 and I just cannot shake this funk that I'm feeling today. I just am so dang depressed I was feeling a little bit over the past week here and there but nothing too bad. But today I had to go into the office and shut then door and i just started crying my eyes out. Couldnt help myself. I am just kicking myself and i hate feeling this way i know time will heal me and some days are worse but I feel like I'm at day 10 all over again and it is so frustrating. Thanks again for listening hope everyone has a great weekend.

  22. #22
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    3,306

    Default

    Hey Beef your doing amazing it's all normal stay positive This too Shall Pass I promise you.. keep posting on here get it all out we are here to support you.. Proud of You... Stay Strong for Today..

  23. #23
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Thanks Lvg. I'm home now. Stopped at the pharmacy on the way home and picked up a multivitamin, vitamin B12, and I'm gonna try some valerian root tonight and see if I can steal a couple of hours. Still feel a little bit more off than usual today. Like I said earlier I feel like I went in reverse a week. I guess its normal. I just don't like feeling this way. But it has made me more determined to stay the course and never let this drug run my life ever again. 3 weeks!!!!! I never thought I would be able to do this. Thanks again to everyone who has been here to give me support, and guide me through this awful process. You guys are a lifesaver, literally. I'm so glad I found these threads. Cat, ricky, randy, lvg, ming, jgray, zebra, Cory you all have been such an inspiration to me and reading how much you all care and help people has really made me want this even more and to help out others who were in the same boat I was 6 months ago. Wanting to make a jump but not knowing how to do it, who to ask for help or just being scared of what is around the corner. Again i cant thank you enough. You guys have all saved my life. Have a great weekend all!!!

    Beef

  24. #24
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,100

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Beefaroni7272 View Post
    Thanks Lvg. I'm home now. Stopped at the pharmacy on the way home and picked up a multivitamin, vitamin B12, and I'm gonna try some valerian root tonight and see if I can steal a couple of hours. Still feel a little bit more off than usual today. Like I said earlier I feel like I went in reverse a week. I guess its normal. I just don't like feeling this way. But it has made me more determined to stay the course and never let this drug run my life ever again. 3 weeks!!!!! I never thought I would be able to do this. Thanks again to everyone who has been here to give me support, and guide me through this awful process. You guys are a lifesaver, literally. I'm so glad I found these threads. Cat, ricky, randy, lvg, ming, jgray, zebra, Cory you all have been such an inspiration to me and reading how much you all care and help people has really made me want this even more and to help out others who were in the same boat I was 6 months ago. Wanting to make a jump but not knowing how to do it, who to ask for help or just being scared of what is around the corner. Again i cant thank you enough. You guys have all saved my life. Have a great weekend all!!!

    Beef
    I started this long post earlier today and got interrupted so it disappeared. Your ups and downs with sleep is so typical and return to normal just takes time and it's gradual. So disappointed when we finally get a decent night's sleep only to be followed by more nights of little to no sleep. But it's a start! Sleeping five hours the other night is a really good sign. You'll begin to get more and more of them but it'll be sprinkled with the bad nights too, just less and less of them. I suggested the Valarian root in the post that went missing earlier so I'm glad you're going to give it a try. If things still stay bad, you might try your doctor because there are sleeping aids that might help and are non addictive. I wouldn't take them for long but might be worth a try. I used Lunesta for a short time. It's a hypnotic and worked for me but I know it didn't worked well for others. Still, might be worth trying. What about Unisom? Over the counter. Again it's hit or miss because works for some of us and not for others. Stay away from the antihistimines. I found those horrible!

    Hope tonight is better for you.

    Peace,

    Cat

  25. #25
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Hey cat. Thanks for the suggestions. Today is day 23!!! Feeling much better than I did over the last two days. May be the vitamins, May be the sleep. Took Valerian root and went to bed around 6pm last night. Probably got 8 hours total last night. Basically got several naps, but didn't have problems falling back asleep. Felt much better in the morning after getting some sleep. About to head into work and feel good outlook is very bright today. Thanks again to all and have a great day.
    Lvg nghtmare likes this.

  26. #26
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Hey guys just wanted to chat a bit. Today has been a good day. Still struggling a little with energy today but looking back at where I was a week ago I'd say I'm doing much better. Symptoms are sloooooowwwwwllllyyyyy starting to subside. Maybe having those two days over the weekend of going backwards helped to give my body a kick in the pants to get it on track. I hope so. I keep telling myself to stay the course. This too shall pass, thanks for that Cat and lvg. It seems like that's my new mantra. Still looking good, and outlook is brighter every day. One day my sleep will return along with my energy hopefully. After that who knows what I'll do with my new found sobriety. Can't wait to find out. Taking it one day at a time and happy as a pig in >>>>e that I've come this Fay and no drug has a hold of me. Thanks again to all. Have a great day!!!
    Lvg nghtmare likes this.

  27. #27
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    3,306

    Default

    Hello I see your doing alot of reading good for you it helped me to keep my mind occupied. Also that this journey has not only a negative side but positive to. Anything is possible if you want it.. keep reading and posting here to support you. Did I say Today I'm Proud of You.... Stay Strong for Today..
    Beefaroni7272 and Catrina like this.

  28. #28
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    5,100

    Default

    What Lvg said is sooooo true! This recovery stuff is and will be among the most challenging and hardest things we'll come up against and to beat it is something to be proud of. The result is, so long as we let it happen, is that we come out even better than we were before. Admittedly, perhaps not the easiest or best way to self improvement but we gotta made lemonade, you know. The entire world opens up shortly after minds regain their sharpness and we are smart enough to recognize that we have an opportunity for a complete re-do should we choose to do that. Change things up! It's exciting as h*ll. Step out there and make a change and be someone you've never attempted to do before. Corny as h*ll but random acts of kindness was one of my new found favorite things. Nothing earth shattering. One of my favorites is getting in the drive-thru at the coffee joint and paying for the order of the car behind me. Most often it's $3 for a cup of coffee. I drive away smiling and it starts me day in such a good way. Once that person chased me down just to say thank you. People are good.

    Keep on trucking. You are getting there and getting there quicker than I would expect. So good!!!

    Peace,

    Cat

  29. #29
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Hey all. Thanks cat. Some good stuff in there as always. Today has been a good day so far. Got a call from my old roommate and he needed a ride to his suboxone doctor. Don't worry I am staying strong and have no craving for a little sliver at all. He is supportive and proud of me. It felt really good, I was wondering how I would feel pulling up to the doctors office. Glad to report that I felt great that I wasn't the one going in there to re up so to speak. I shared a little knowledge that I picked up over the past two weeks with him but I made sure not to preach. He wants to get off them and he will when he is ready. Feeling great today. Glad to be here, still staying strong and taking it a step at a time. Thank you to all and have a great day!!! Oh by the way it's day 24!!!!!

    Beef
    Lvg nghtmare likes this.

  30. #30
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    1,844

    Default

    Good morning everyone. Sitting here on day 25!!! Just think in about my journey thus far. Gotta say it's been tough but I feel better every day. (With the exception of last weekend) today has been decent. So far it's been a good day. Don't feel bad. Sleep was a bit spotty last night but it is slowly getting better it seems. Woke up soaked with sweat for the first time around 1am. I'm surprised it hasn't happened before. Depression isn't bad today. Keeping a positive outlook. Fatigue is there but not as bad as it has been in the past. Still taking it a day at a time and not looking too far ahead. Ready for this grueling journey to be over and start my new sober life. Got meetings all day and a conference call to be on. Just gotta try not to doze off and act like I'm involved in what's going on. Fake it till I make it. Staying the course and just taking it slow. Brain feels a little foggy today. But I guess its normal. Like I said nothing is bad anymore just slightly bothersome. Like a gnat at a picnic. Thanks to all for listening and have a great day everyone.

    Beef
    Lvg nghtmare likes this.

Page 1 of 31 12311 ... LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. the suboxone diaries. a day to day account for those quitting suboxone.
    By notEVERlookingBACK in forum Featured Conditions
    Replies: 135
    Last Post: 09-14-2017, 04:47 PM
  2. I need info on Suboxone please
    By Slevin77 in forum Need to Talk?
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 09-24-2013, 12:57 AM
  3. Suboxone Info
    By Jennifer1984 in forum Need to Talk?
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 11-27-2010, 08:12 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22