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Day 6 oxy withdrawal question?
  1. #31
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Just reflecting.
    I’m embarrassed!!!
    I’ve always questioned how anybody could be addicted to drugs. I was that person that thought it was simply a choice. Boy was I wrong!!!! I use to be so judgmental. What a hypocrite...
    I don’t drink alcohol. Don’t smoke. But I did smoke weed for a few years out of college.
    Again. Just feel guilt. It’s crazy to say, but I want to feel like >>>> so that I’m punished.

  2. #32
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Maybe my “punishment” is the guilt and my remorse???

  3. #33
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Day 7 today.
    Feeling like a fog has lifted in my brain. Sun is brighter, grass is greener. Everything is like 3D. Senses seem heightened.
    Funniest thing is I don’t feel much pain from my body. Minimal aches.
    I do get goosebumps occasionally.

    Never thought I could be off the pills for 7 days.

    Guess it’s about being determined to win this battle.

    Thanks for listening.
    Just feels good to be here and express myself. Been in a hole for too long.

  4. #34
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    When we live in today it builds a better tomorrow...

    Day 7 pretty great not depending on those little pills eh...
    As we gain clean time we find our true pain. One ibuprofen works for me today still amazes me. Yes all our senses come alive we get our feelings back too.
    Keep up the good work proud of you... Keep reading and posting we are all here to support you...
    Beefaroni7272 likes this.

  5. #35
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Thanks Lvg
    Today will be a big test.
    Have to get out in public all day without any of my “little friends”
    Excited and nervous at the same time.
    Feels weird not having to worry about calculating how many hours I’ll be gone, and how many pills I’ll need to bring with me. Gotta get use to it.
    New beginning. Gotta start somewhere.
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  6. #36
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Oh I know that fear well. All just feelings my friend. Believe me everything you are feeling is all human. We are supposed to feel. Just know with uncomfortable feelings brings about change. I'm sure you have heard many motivational speeches over the years use those tools you have. You have started racking up those clean days. Everything takes time just enjoy Today...
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  7. #37
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by BBHappy View Post
    Day 7 today.
    Feeling like a fog has lifted in my brain. Sun is brighter, grass is greener. Everything is like 3D. Senses seem heightened.
    Funniest thing is I don’t feel much pain from my body. Minimal aches.
    I do get goosebumps occasionally.

    Never thought I could be off the pills for 7 days.

    Guess it’s about being determined to win this battle.

    Thanks for listening.
    Just feels good to be here and express myself. Been in a hole for too long.
    Congratulations on one week!! I can promise you it only gets better. You're absolutely right about being determined. You have to really want it. More than anything else. Sounds like you do and that's great!! Keep that positive mindset. Don't let your "little friends" back in the picture. They lie for sure.

    Like most everyone else here I know the feeling of the counting and preparing, making sure there's enough so you don't get sick or run out. I think when I really knew I had to stop was when I was going to my best friends wedding last year. I had my suboxone in a zip lock bag that the pharmacist gave me and it had the sticker with my name and all my info and it was a legal Rx but just not in a bottle. We'll guess who gets "randomly" searched by TSA?? How about the 6'8" 300 pounder?? Sure, why not. Went through my bag and they were about to confiscate my meds. I was begging pleading with them, I just about dropped on the ground and had a full on tantrum. Finally the supervisor came over and they eventually let me go. But I reflected on that situation and knew I had some serious issues.

    The first trip I took without having to worry about dosing was an absolute treat. Just made everything better. Today I'm coming up on 9 months clean from 8+ years of oxy, then suboxone addiction. It was quite a journey. But I wouldn't trade a minute of it. Things are so much better on this side of the fence.

    Seem to have gotten sidetracked by a story. Anyways BB, hope you have a great day. Let us know how it went.

    Beef
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  8. #38
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Thanks Beef.
    Well, I’ve officially succeeded on my 1st day out in public!!!! So happy!!!
    Left the house at noon and just returned.....13 hours.
    I caught myself a few times asking myself: how am I speaking and meeting people without my “little friends”. And how am I so engaged and outgoing with people. Then I felt so stupid for not stopping this >>>> sooner.
    Didn’t have any urge or cravings.
    My biggest fear was about whether I would have the energy to make it through as well as keeping a smile on my face.
    Just told myself: there’s no turning back.
    I think this may be the first time I genuinely was engaged in conversations with people and was listening. In the past, I was just going thru the motions waiting to rush home to bed so I can take my meds in the morning.
    I really believe I am over the hump. Haven’t taken immodium or Advil and I don’t feel much pain.
    A little worried hearing some people here saying that some symptoms will pop up unexpectedly.
    But then I go back to some of the advice from you guys.
    Stop worrying about the what if’s. Live in the moment and enjoy being clean.
    Don’t think I could have done this without reading on these forums.
    You guys are awesome.

    Thank you.

  9. #39
    Sinthetiks1222 is offline Junior Member
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    You are spot on about the senses being awakened. After about two weeks clean for me I recall vividly stepping outside to take the bus. It almost felt like vertigo. Like someone turned the lights and sound on for the first time in 10 years. It was disorienting to say the least. But in a good way?

    And those experiences keep coming. Once or twice a month now I just look and think to myself, where has all this sight sounds and smells been hiding. It's crazy. I'm a chef by trade and I can't believe what it has done to my palette. Food tastes so much different now. Can't say if better or worse but just...stronger?

    Keep it up. Freedom is priceless.
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  10. #40
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Thanks Sin.
    It’s great to hear feedback from people that are going thru or went thru the same things.
    Sometimes I feel like I just need a little re assurance.
    Thanks again.
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  11. #41
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Today is day 9. Doing good so far. Remaining strong. Had my 1st real craving this morning. Couldn’t get it out of my head. If I could just take 1 so I have the energy to fight the day.
    Good thing I have no more.
    Just writing here to vent.

    Thanks for listening.
    Lvg nghtmare likes this.

  12. #42
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Platinum Member
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    Cravings will happen. Just know that you're stronger than that little pill. It will take you right back to where you were. Just acknowledge it for what it is and move on. It's just a feeling and it will pass. You're doing great!! Stay with it.

    Have a great day!!
    Beef
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  13. #43
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Thanks Beef.
    Decided to go get a shower and get outside. Took my mind off of it.
    Still fighting the fight.

    Thanks.

  14. #44
    OKC-26 is offline Member
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    You’re doing awesome bbhappy! 9 days is huge! One day at a time. Before you know it you’ll have to look back and count too see how many days you have clean, it’s a great feeling.

    Like beef said, cravings will happen. I’m over 2 months clean and a couple times a week it crosses my mind still. When it does I find something to distract myself. Even something as small as brushing my teeth. Don’t give the cravings a chance to stay in your head. Again you’re doing great. Keep it up!

  15. #45
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Thanks OKC
    Nice to hear others going through the same thing.

  16. #46
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Funniest thing.
    Not sure if others here do the same thing. Went out to run some errands today and I caught myself looking at people closely. When I see happy people, I wonder if they are on pills. When I see angry/sad people I wonder if they are on pills or in w/d. Not sure if anyone can relate.
    I’m starting to think that likely the happy people I see are clean and just enjoying life.
    Just curious.
    I’m noticing that I’m more alert and my senses are not dulled anymore.

  17. #47
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by BBHappy View Post
    Funniest thing.
    Not sure if others here do the same thing. Went out to run some errands today and I caught myself looking at people closely. When I see happy people, I wonder if they are on pills. When I see angry/sad people I wonder if they are on pills or in w/d. Not sure if anyone can relate.
    I’m starting to think that likely the happy people I see are clean and just enjoying life.
    Just curious.
    I’m noticing that I’m more alert and my senses are not dulled anymore.
    Oh yes. I can go further than that. Before I managed to get clean, I would always check other people out as they went about their business and I'd be enthralled by the fact that here are so many people and most of them got out of bed this morning and didn't need to take a pill. How was that possible? I'd wonder. It was almost an obsession. I couldn't resist looking at their eyes to see if their pupils were pinpoints or not. I just couldn't grasp the fact that there were people in this world who could negotiate their lives clean and sober.

    It's a good feeling--the best feeling-- to be one of them. Isn't it?

    Peace,

    Cat

  18. #48
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Certainly is Cat. Thought I was going crazy. Wondering why I was looking at everyone. Lol
    Again, makes me feel good that I’m not the only one.
    Thanks.

  19. #49
    Longgone2008 is offline Member
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    You are doing AWESOME! I am on day 8 so not too far behind you.
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  20. #50
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    I do this all the time. The news give statistics that just about everyone is on them and I am always amazed how normal we can all act. However, I know for me, I have become much more of a recluse. I always have grand thoughts of going out and doing things, but when it comes right down to it, I don't.

    The thing about the grand theme of cutting off pain pills is that, unfortunately, I believe people will go to street drugs. I won't, but I can see many doing this. Fentyl (sp?), Oxy, percs--to me those should only be used in very special circumstances. Yes, Norco is a problem, however, not as much as the above. Does it lead to wanting more and more? Absolutely. Do I have an answer for that? No, but I wish I did. It's all about money. You hear more and more about the larger drugs and people dying from them. My sister did. I'm not sure the difference between Oxy and percs. I guess I could look it up. My sister died of an overdose of percs. I think she took them for 25 years. This was 10 years ago and as far as I know, they were all doctor prescribed. It was in Las Vegas. That is one big city, and I'm sure 10 years ago it was a free for all. I do remember her telling me she didn't care for this one pharmacist who gave her a hard time. I was so naive and didn't get it back then. I seriously didn't give it a second thought that she had a problem. Ovey...

    Not sure about the rambling this morning. I have done nothing this weekend. I managed to shower this morning. I manage to work during the week. It's raining. I need to get to the grocery. Am taking dlpa again and really hoping it helps this time. Depression and anxiety is the worst. Not that long ago I would have bounced of the house by now and been on my trail. Now, it's just not there. The want the gumption back. My husband is avoiding me as much as possible and I don't blame him. I am so crabby.

    Sorry for the complaining. I seem to do a lot of that lately.

    I will say I am not a big basketball fan, but I am intrigued by these two teams. I'm for Steph. He always seems so happy. LOL. I know, choosing a team based upon a smiling person. . . . Silly.

    Hope

  21. #51
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Day 10. Body is feeling better. Mood is also improving. There are still times I get cravings. I do feel like my energy is coming back very gradually.
    Gotta stay strong and fight thru this.
    Still struggling to sleep through the night (4-5 hours). I’m sure it’ll improve as some on this forum has mentioned.

  22. #52
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Body is better mood is improving cravings just a feeling sit still and this too shall pass I promise you... You sound wonderful Today. Pretty great right... sleep don't fight it your body will let you know when it's time to get rest. Stay positive stay hydrated and keep your mind and body active. Proud of you my friend...

    Grateful to be clean and alive...

  23. #53
    OKC-26 is offline Member
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    You’re doing awesome man. If you go and read my threat I whined and complained. You’re one tough dude. Congratulations on your day 10. I think the sleep is right around the corner for you. Shouldn’t be much longer at all. One day at a time BB. Keep it up!

  24. #54
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Thanks OKC. Today is definitely going better. Day 11!!!
    Got 6 hours of sleep last night. Cravings come and go. Still get a few chills occasionally. Eyes get blurry from time to time. Is that normal?

  25. #55
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Platinum Member
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    Yes. It's all normal. It will pass. You're doing great. You're gonna have good days and bad days. It's a bit of a roller coaster for the first few weeks. But good days will become more frequent and the bad ones will slowly diminish until they're gone. We still have life stuff to deal with lol. But being clean for the first time in 8+ years is better than I could have imagined.

    The sleep thing. 4-6 hours a night really isn't that bad at this point either. I know it seems brutal but believe me it could definately be worse. Sober sleep is different from sleep on the junk. It takes some getting used to. I used to get 8-9 hours a night. Now I'm right around 6. I guess it's my new "normal". Just don't fight it. If you can't get to sleep, grab a book, put on something mindless on netflix, hop on here and read a few really long threads. Anything to keep your mind occupied.

    Keep up the good work BB!! You're doing great.
    Beef
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  26. #56
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Thanks Beef. Nice to hear that these symptoms are normal. I’m ok with the sleep. Wish I didn’t have to wake up every 2 hours to pee.
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  27. #57
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Platinum Member
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    Ha!! Sorry I had to laugh there. Yup that was me also. Everyone kept telling me to drink as much water as possible, stay hydrated, it'll help flush out the junk. I mean don't get me wrong it helps and it worked. But yup, I paid for it at night. Lol

    Have a great day bossman!!
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  28. #58
    BBHappy is offline Junior Member
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    Thanks beef. again, I’m not the only one. Lol
    Keep drinking...but I am definitely regretting it while sleeping.
    Can’t stop sneezing also. Comes with the territory I guess.

  29. #59
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Platinum Member
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    Yup. Still sneeze just about every day. But it's better than day one.
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  30. #60
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    You know I'm laughing Beef
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