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Kicking a 1.5 year Oxy habit in the coming days with Suboxone and supplements.
  1. #61
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    Thanks for the support Ming! Like you said, I certainly plan on being where they are at soon. All of you are amazing. It's a huge help having this support.
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  2. #62
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    So good!!! Day 3. I think that the Gaba is helping you a lot and your ability to catch some sleep is tremendous. I don't think it will get any worse but instead the symptoms will come and go depending upon when you are taking the Gaba. Someone else may have said that the RLS and aches left very abruptly and I said that too. It was like an angel touched me and I was go grateful for it to be gone. I was afraid to move for fear that it was just a moment of respite but nope. It was gone!

    Check in later. I have another busy day but will try to check on you. If you don't hear from me, I'm not ignoring you, just busy.

    Peace,

    Cat
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  3. #63
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    Yes, I can kind of feel it now and a touch of that flu feeling. Not out of the woods yet, but a big improvement for sure! Thanks for the support Cat. You mean you aren't dropping everything in your life to just sit at your computer waiting for my updates?? Boooo. Jk, thanks for everything Cat.

    I really hope I've turned the corner here, crested the hill and am on the way back down.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-13-2016 at 08:25 AM.
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  4. #64
    Smith9666 is offline Junior Member
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    I remember the first day that the RLS kind of just disappeared. I waited all day a little anxious for the night time. I even drank extra water even though I know it doesn't help much in that area. My thoughts were to flush out anything left just a little faster, all mental obviously. But I was desperate ha-ha. Not so desperate since I knew I can something to knock me out cold if I wanted it but I had taken the Xanax for 3 nights already and didn't want to continue if not needed but wasn't afraid to eirher.

    Anyways so I waited until about 9pm. Made sure I stayed busy all day prior. Went for a 4 mile walk to tire myself out twice that day. Then when I was very sleepy, to the point that I couldn't keep my eyes open I went and layed down and waited for the rls to kick in. I hadn't taken any comfort meds since the night before because I just wanted to see if it was truly over (I do not recommend stopping the gaba for you just yet. It can't hurt to continue a little longer). 15 minutes passed, no RLS. 20 minutes and bam. I was out cold. Slept 6 hours straight and woke up around 4 and was so relieved I could have cried, but I didn't for the record. Gotnout of bed, walked around the house. Did some dishes and then went back for another 3 hours.

    Didn't have any issues from that night on but I will warn you not to let the anxiety get to you. I've never had anxiety issues prior to this but I did after. Going to sleep for awhile made me anxious. I would have to constantly force myself to calm down prior and not worry about how easy I fall asleep. I was so used to the pills i had been on for so long taking me to a calm dream land and that wasn't an option anymore.

    I hope today is good for you but if you do feel a little RLS or anything, don't stress. It may come and go. Just stay busy and eat a good amount of food. Trick yourself into thinking its over and maybe it is. :-) If you're feeling good all day and are up to it tonight, maybe consider just taking the gaba and dropping the benzo. It can't hurt. If it turns out you have one more night of RLS and such, just take the benzo a little later. But maybe you will find out you do not need it after all.
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  5. #65
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Quick check. Here's a thought for you. Day 3 means that by the end of today if you had to pee in a cup it would likely be clean!!! Inspiration for the day. I just remember how awesome that felt.

    Peace,

    Cat
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  6. #66
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    Smith...I took some more gaba this morning because I was starting to feel it a bit and decided to stay the course another day at least. An hour later I fell asleep again for about 1 1/2 hours. Thank you for sharing how it was for you. it helps more than you know. I plan to do a real workout today similar to your 4 mile walks. We will see how I feel, but I'm pretty sure I'll take one more night of benzos, which would be three nights. I'm looking for a solid 7 or 8 hours, but even if I don't get it, if I feel decent tomorrow then tonight has to be the last night for those. I simply can't risk a dependency to benzos.

    Cat...what an awesone thing that is!! I don't know why, it's not like I will be tested anytime soon. i guess just knowing it's completely out of my system. At any rate, that put a huge smile on my face. Thank you so much.
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  7. #67
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    DAy 3 will be over in a few hours. I woke up feeling great and then it kind of came and went but still in a rather mild way. Day 3 has been much better than day 2.

    My biggest issue right now is the constant need to be in the bathroom so I took a heavy dose of loperamide to help slow down that problem. Ugh.

    The other thing I'm dealing with is I am dead beat tired. It takes everything I have to get out of bed. Like I still have the flu. I even fell asleep twice. So two small naps that I am greatful for, but it's like they did nothing to help with this tiredness! I'm starting to think it's the gabapentin. That stuff has been fantastic for me, but it also knocks me out pretty good at 600mg a pop.

    I want to workout even though it's the LAST thing my body wants. I feel like if I don't do something to kick start my brain chemicals they are just going to sit there and do nothing or maybe heal but very slowly. If I get some decent cardio for 45 minutes I know it will make me feel better or at least get those brain chemicals scrambled and moving. It's up to me to feel better. I feel like I can't sit around hoping I will magically get there. If I sit around I think it's gonig to take 5 times as long. No, I HAVE to get the >>>> UP and do it!! I'm doing it now. Screw it. I'll let you guys know how it goes.

  8. #68
    Smith9666 is offline Junior Member
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    Yes, definately workout. I used that as a huge tool during my wd. Especially after I started to feel how you are now. Not sure if I was over it but still feeling it some.

    Working out gives you adrenaline and I am a huge believer that it helped with sleep and to help with all the mental nonsense. It's hard but you can do it. Just don't over do it. Listen to your body but try for at least 20-30 minutes of cardio. It will do you good. Maybe tomorrow try doing it in the morning and then again midday. But whatever is more convenient for you is best.

    I think you're out of the worst. I feel tomorrow will be the day that you have a huge turnaround and its all uphill from there.

    Good job! You did it.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-13-2016 at 08:09 PM.
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  9. #69
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Jake, (Does that work?)

    Day 3. Nearly in the books. Exercise is great and will help get those feel good feelings going. I actually hate to exercise but once I'm done, it just feels so good. Laughing sends me on the best natural high. The good, belly laughs, can't breathe, til you cry kinda laughing. It's the best. I have a group of friends and we're silly and outrageous and politically incorrect and it's the absolute best. Do you have any of those or is it just a girly thing? Hope you do.

    Peace,

    Cat
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  10. #70
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    I did it! I went to the gym and did 30 minutes on the eliptical and then did some fairly light weight lifting for maybe 15 minutes. Lol, of course they have those big mirrors and I couldn't help but laugh at the way I looked. I looked like I have been hit by a truck!! Like I had No business being in there lol. But, I got it done and of course I feel better. It's like my eyes are more open and I can see things more clearly. Working out always helps me. It's something I'm going to be doing daily for a long time.

    I really hope tomorrow is my day. While today was better, I was still withdrawing pretty bad at times but in different ways than the first two days. I think I'm on the fast track and I couldn't be more thankful!!! Hope that didn't jinx me! I have read quite a few accounts of people feeling a lot better at day 3, but most of those were taking much less than I was but I really didn't take them that long so maybe that is why I'm improving rather quickly.

    Cat, Smith, Robert, Ming (and others I'm forgetting)...I want you all to know something. i didn't think for one second that I could jump from 200mg oxy and not take suboxone to help. I thought it was nuts to go CT from that! You guys saved me. You all literally saved me from what could have been a long drawn out painful withdrawal. I cannot thank you enough. I'm a stubborn guy and I'm not sure why I listened to some anonymous people who have nothing better than sit around helping people, but I did and I'm so so so happy I did. THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!
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  11. #71
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    Yes, Jake works lol

  12. #72
    Oxy-moronic is offline Banned
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    Hey oxyblues
    That's awesome that you're feeling better. That part about the mirrors at the gym had me laughing. I know exactly what you mean. When I look in the mirror I laugh. I look like hell worn over. Thankfully it has been pretty sunny here and I can get away with always having sunglasses on. I'm still not 100% though. My rls is almost nonexistent, the only time I see any signs of it are when I'm trying to sleep and it's very very mild. My stomach is at about 80% I think but the insomnia is whipping my ass for the past 48 hours. I was smoking pot through all of this and it definitely helped knock the edge off. I haven't smoked since early Monday. I haven't slept either. I'm able to lie down and not move at all but I can't bonk out. I feel not just tired but very sleepy as well and I haven't felt that since I started using again. Last night on my way home I was pretty happy with that fact. I eliminated all distractions got comfortable, layed down and closed my eyes and nothing more happened....but then more nothing happened. Allllllllllll night long. I laid down around 9. I felt like it had been an hour or so and I checked my watch. It was 1 a.m. time zipped by so fast, it felt strange. All night was like that. It has definitely affected my mood. I felt amazing yesterday but not so much today. I need sleep! I also don't want to have to rely on pot or ambien or anything else for that matter. Am I being impatient and rushing it too fast? Should I just break down and smoke a little pot? That's all I have and I'm not going to go get any benzos or zolpidem. Or am I just being a sissy? Maybe I am but this sucks. Any ideas or suggestions? I picked up some melatonin. Benadryl makes me jittery and so does nyquil.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-13-2016 at 10:26 PM.
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  13. #73
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    Hey Oxy,

    Sorry to hear of your sleep issues. For all I know I might have them too, except for the fact that I am using benzos and gaba and the combination has been getting me 4 or 5 hours a night plus a nap or two here and there.

    I've tried melatonin and benadryl/vistirol in the past and it did nothing for me, but everyone is different so maybe give both a shot? Also, I can understand your reluctance to benzos. Those suckers can lead to much bigger issues than opiate wd, trust me I know. When you were sober in the past did you have trouble sleeping? The reason I ask is because I have always had sleep issues. So I plan on doing the ambien thing. I spent a couple of years fighting sleep and finally realized that I would most likely need an aid. It is what it is. It's either be tired all the time which leads to mood issues which leads to substance abuse or I give in and take the meds. I hear you about nyquil! That stuff keeps me up all night tossing and turning with strange dreams!!

    You need some sleep man. You know how important it is. Honestly, why not get a few ambien or something to get you back on track and relieve your sleep deprivation even if only for a week??! When you are rested and healed then you can get off those and try natural again? Just an idea.

    On the other hand, I've read lots of stories about how sleep took forever, like weeks, to come back for some people but it almost always does eventually. So, if you can hang tough then i'm sure it will come. There will be a night where it just happens and you will be so happy. It's just a matter of getting from here to there and dealing without sleep until it happens.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-14-2016 at 01:46 AM.

  14. #74
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    Day 4 has started and I'm going to bed. I can't believe 3 days have passes. Those were some very long days let me tell you!! But, I feel like I'm coming out of it now. I took half the gaba tonight because the rls isn't as bad and want to wean off a bit, I also took my, hopefully, last night of kpins. If I sleep well then that's that for those. Evil medication benzos are. That sounded like yoda.

    I feel good. The workout helped a ton. RLS has mostly subsided. I'm still tired like I have the flu but not as achey. Can't wait for tomorrow!!
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  15. #75
    Smith9666 is offline Junior Member
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    Hope sleep comes easy tonight.

    I just want to warn you not to take anything like nyquil, or zzzquil or benedryl for sleeping for a couple weeks at least.

    That was a mistake I wish I hadn't done while going through wd's. It made the wd symptoms 10 times worse and made sleeping even harder. I'm not sure how it would effect you once you are doing better, like even tomorrow but be careful. After I made the mistake, everyone of course warned me ha-ha.

    Melatonin is safe but you have to make sure you stick to the 'ritual' prior or it won't work well. I did use it though and just made sure I was exremelu tired before even trying to sleep. It won't be as bad as you think since you went through RLS. After dealing with that like you have, sleeping issues won't be a big deal really. At least you won't be miserable and not able to sleep at the same time ha-ha.

    I have a feeling you will sleep fine tonight and tomorrow will be a good day.
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  16. #76
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    Well, It's the middle of the night and sleep is once again eluding me. I can still feel the RLS in my legs. It's not much, but it's enough to keep me up. Nothing worse than having that sleepy feeling and not be able to actually fully sleep. In a minutue i will give myself he big dose of gaba and hope that does the trick. I hate this.

  17. #77
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Good Morning Jake,

    Day 4! Wahooo. You're really doing this. I hope that you're sleeping like a baby. I'm getting ready for work (yes I do things other than haunt you). Just catching up on how you're feeling.

    The sleep thing. Remember that for me this had always been the thing that would cause me to relapse more than any other one thing. It's smart to talk to your doctor about getting something non-addictive to help you if that's always been an issue. That was true for me too. I had taken opiates for so long I honestly didn't know what a typical night's sleep would be for me. Turns out it's around 5 hours. I never did need much sleep and still don't. It's just that early on, the malaise that remains post detox we tend to want to blame on not sleeping 8 or more hours a night. During detox I didn't sleep at all. During the following week, I began to sleep 3 or 4 hours and found it so frustrating. Then I came to peace with that and lo and behold once the malaise passed I'm good. For the record, anything with benadryl doesn't agree with me either! Makes me want to jump out of my skin while being sleepy at the same time.

    Coming out the other side. I too am so glad you listened to us. This is hard but it is almost over. If you'd taken tiny pieces of those subs at this point you'd still be looking at 10 days or more of this >>>>.

    You have to hang around here and pay it forward. Your story and journey is important. Think about it. If we weren't here hounding you, you'd have tried it your way because you thought this was impossible. There's a lot of people out there thinking that exact same thing. Not impossible at all.

    Peace,

    Cat
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  18. #78
    Oxy-moronic is offline Banned
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    Hi all.
    I broke down and smoked last night around 130 A.M. by 2 I was out like a light!! It felt amazing to get some Z's. At the same time I'm annoyed that I smoked. I generally don't have sleep issues. For some reason, Tuesday has been my best day which was day 5. 6 if you count Thursday but I'm not sure Thursday counts since I did use for the last time at 8am that day.
    Sleep is my Achilles heal and I don't want to go back to the hell that awaits me with open arms. I wish it was warm so I could go surfing. Nothing wears you out like a day in the sun while getting your ass handed to you by the ocean.
    I thought it was just me who had adverse reactions to benadryl and zzzquil, happy to know I'm not a weirdo.

    The good part is I got about 6 hours of sleep. Solid uninterrupted sleep. Bad part is I had to smoke to achieve this. I think I'm being impatient.
    I hope you were able to get some sleep too "Jake" and keep up the good work hotshot!!
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  19. #79
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    Hey everyone,

    So around 4am I finally fell asleep, again I think it was the gaba. I was able to sleep well until 8:30, so another night of 4 to 5 hours and I'm thankful for that. The problem is my little rehab vacation is coming to an end and it's time to get back to the real world. I need to go to work tomorrow. My "flu" needs to be over and I certainly feel decent enough that I can handle work.

    I feel good. Not great, but good. It's the middle of Day 4 and I don't feel bad so I must be out of the woods at this point. Thank the lord it only lasted this long and I'm not sitting around on day 6 asking why it hasn't left!!!!!!

    So sleep and general malaise are my next battles. From the sounds of the rest of you this is entirely normal. It's too bad that sleep is something that takes so long to come back. I mean, I can't very well show up to my job at 9am! Hell, I'm supposed to be there at 6:30am! What am I going to do? Hell if I know. I guess I'll just have some no sleep nights and maybe that will eventually wear me down so that I do fall asleep at an hour where I can get to work on time and get some sleep at the same time. For the malaise I will be working out daily and generally getting in good shape.

    Oxy-moronic, surfing sounds like a perfect idea man. I haven't surfed since I was a kid, but I played water polo for many years and I know how achingly tired being in the water and being physical makes you! I would totally do that if I were you. In fact, that gives me an idea. We have a masters water polo team where I live. I'm in about as good a shape to play for about 5 seconds right now, but maybe I will start training with the goal that I can play with those guys. I miss it a lot. Hmmm.

    Thanks for the help everyone!! I think I'm in the clear for the most part. Time to start living again. One step at a time.

    Anyone reading this then know this. A year and a half ago I started taking 3 to 4 10mg vics a day within a month or two it was 6 to 7 10 mg vics and within a month or two of that, or 8 months ago I went all the way to 24 10mg vics a day or 240mgs, thank God I did CWE half the time or my liver would be thrashed, at that point I found oxy and went from around 100mg vic with 100mg oxy a day and then the last few months it was 200mg oxy and sometimes more than that. Then I quit cold turkey WITHOUT TAPERING AT ALL and used gaba and a benzo only at night. I made it through the WDs and the truth is, IT WASN'T THAT BAD. It sucks man. It's the flu. Maybe a bad flu that comes and goes a bit. Don't let others scare you. Just do it and get it over with and you will be sitting there hurting and thinking when will the really bad stuff hit but it might never hit. Then it just dissipates and goes away. If I can do it anyone can do it!! Stop taking that >>>> and start living!!!!!

    I'll update soon. Thank you everyone for your help and support!!
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-14-2016 at 01:27 PM.
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  20. #80
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Best wishes for your return to work. You're going to do just fine. The sleep thing? Don't fret about it. I did that too. When I finally realized that I can run in high gear on 5 hours sleep, all was good. I love, love the early mornings. Good thing! I'm typically up by 4am and I have a few hours of complete quite to do whatever I want--like bug you. I can have a couple cups of coffee, catch up on the news and still have plenty of time for a shower and to get dressed for work. Beginning my day without being hurried and without chaos sets the tone for my day.

    Work is good. You'll be forced at first to face the day on work's schedule and you will ease right into it by falling asleep a bit earlier at night and getting up earlier in the morning. You're good!!! YAY!

    Peace,

    Cat
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-14-2016 at 02:58 PM.
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  21. #81
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    Thanks Cat, and that makes a lot of sense. So I got out of bed after writing my little victory speech and soon realized I am BEAT tired! Lmao. Next thing I know I heading for my bed. The thing is, all the weird WD symptoms are gone, but I'm left with a tiredness that still feels like the flu. Not bad at all mind you, just annoying and bad enough that I'll be in and out of lying down most of the day I think. I feel like I ran a marathon or something.

    Still, my eyes are more open today and I can see more clearly. I'm just about done with this. I'm just wondering if in one more day I will have at least more energy then it takes to go to the bathroom and back? Tomorrow is a big day for me. It's my planned return to civilization! i need to have at least enough energy to fake being halfway okay. I seriously can't do that right now.

    It's a comfortable ache and tiredness now as compared to that skin crawly, RLS BS, pit in the stomach kind of thing that was the first three days. So that's good.

  22. #82
    Catrina is offline Diamond Member
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    Jake,

    I'm going to give it to your straight between the eyes. You will likely be much better tomorrow with the aches. The weakness, remember I warned you would hang out for a bit. Eat well, stay hydrated and exercise. I remember almost crying at the thought of leaving the house on Day 6. Funny thing happened. When I got to work, I wasn't doing jumping jacks but I actually felt much, much better being around people. Fake it til you make it. By the time I got home, my azz was dragging. With the aforementioned regiment, you will feel stronger and stronger every day.

    Peace,

    Cat
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  23. #83
    Smith9666 is offline Junior Member
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    Going back to work will do you a lot more good then you know. When I went through my WD's I took a week vacation and took a person day along with my two days off right after, so I had 10 days off in a row.

    Seeing how I was apparently some special case, my WD's barely hit the stage you are today on day 9 I believe, so I was worried as you are about going back to work. I was working 5 ten hour shifts which wasn't too bad but a 6 hour would have been a little better ha-ha.

    Anyways, I can say that being at work and not sitting around thinking about how I'm feeling wd wise, how are my rrls and all of that, made things so much easier. When I was moving constantly, I didn't feel anything. The symptoms had all but disappeared anyways so it was a combo of both I think.

    If I were you, I would skip the gaba dose really early tomorrow because it can be the cause for the sleepyness. Although you would know if it makes you sleepy or not, so your call. It never made me tired but I've heard for some it did.

    The haze you have been in should start lifting very soon. Sleep wise, its really important not to physch yourself out. I can't tell you how hard that was for me to figure out but it really is mental, that is once the RLS goes away which should be over with and you probably won't feel any tonight. For me, I incorporated a sleep routine. Someone on the site I was on had suggested it and I kind of laughed but it worked so whose laughing now LOL. It's similiar to what you would do with your kiddos when trying to get them to a good routine. Bath (which helped with any lingering RLS, which wasn't a ton). Then I would take the melatonin. Turn off all the lights, put away every single devise I had (phone, tablet). Turn off the TV and just lay down in the living room with a book and small light. If I went to my bed, I just got anxious.. Again all mental. I would read until I was tired enough that I was confident I could go fall asleep. I felt the key to the melatonin helping was the no lights, phone or TV but I could be wrong.

    Usually when I kept to the schedule, I could get decent sleep. If you wake up after two hours feeling anxious... Let's talk about that for a second actually anxiety. I had never had anxiety issues prior to this so I did not understand that I was feeling that, rather then wd symptoms. I thought I was just having lingering wd issues when in reality, it was anxiety. So try to recognize that over it being wd's. It makes it easier to handle once you do.

    If you wake up feeling anxious, get out of bed, go get water, do something small then go back and just tell yourself, if I don't sleep then oh well. No pressure.

    It will go easier then fighting your bed. Ha-ha that would be funny for your wife to watch seeing how she missed the original 'fight'.

    I think you're going to be happy with the sleep you get tonight and so on. I think this is the point when I was at least able to sleep and not feel the RLS at all.

  24. #84
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    Great points Smith. For sure the Gabapentin is making me tired. Even when I take it in the day I am in a nap an hour after I take it. So, Im gonig to cut that into a very short taper and tomorrow morning not take any at all. Maybe a small dose tomorrow before bed.

    I know going to work will get me on a more normal feeling routine, I just dread those first couple of days and sort of like Cat said, faking it til I make it. But, not too worried. I'll get it done.

    As far as sleep and ongoing issues in that arena. I've had my battles in that department for a really long time. I've tried every single non script remedy there is from melatonin to vistriol to all sorts of herbs and teas. It runs in the family as well. I've sort of resigned myself to having to get on ambien or one of the other scripts. You don't know how hard I've tried to not go that route. It's a big issue for me. I'm certainly not going to take Benzos for that.So when i get home I may switch to that and see what happens.

    On a side note. Years ago I had a benzo dependency to Ativan and it got quite severe. I was detoxed from a high dose over 5 days to a dose about 1/10th what I was on and then swithed to valium for a 6 week taper. If you want to talk about hell and wish you were dead sort of detox that would be more fitting.It wasn't fighting with my bed, I was literally JUMPING out of my bed mulriple times a night thinking mmy heart was stopping or the world was ending!! It was still doable, just painful and much scarier and I wouldn't even attmept it without medical supervision which I thankfully had. Ugh, brutal. Maybe that's why I haven't thought this withdrawal was too horrible? Who knows.

    I'm going to rest up this last day. Get my >>>> together and jump back into the real world tomorrow on day 5.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-14-2016 at 04:59 PM.

  25. #85
    Smith9666 is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by oxyblues View Post
    Great points Smith. For sure the Gabapentin is making me tired. Even when I take it in the day I am in a nap an hour after I take it. So, Im gonig to cut that into a very short taper and tomorrow morning not take any at all. Maybe a small dose tomorrow before bed.

    I know going to work will get me on a more normal feeling routine, I just dread those first couple of days and sort of like Cat said, faking it til I make it. But, not too worried. I'll get it done.

    As far as sleep and ongoing issues in that arena. I've had my battles in that department for a really long time. I've tried every single non script remedy there is from melatonin to vistriol to all sorts of herbs and teas. It runs in the family as well. I've sort of resigned myself to having to get on ambien or one of the other scripts. You don't know how hard I've tried to not go that route. It's a big issue for me. I'm certainly not going to take Benzos for that.So when i get home I may switch to that and see what happens.

    On a side note. Years ago I had a benzo dependency to Ativan and it got quite severe. I was detoxed from a high dose over 5 days to a dose about 1/10th what I was on and then swithed to valium for a 6 week taper. If you want to talk about hell and wish you were dead sort of detox that would be more fitting.It wasn't fighting with my bed, I was literally JUMPING out of my bed mulriple times a night thinking mmy heart was stopping or the world was ending!! It was still doable, just painful and much scarier and I wouldn't even attmept it without medical supervision which I thankfully had. Ugh, brutal. Maybe that's why I haven't thought this withdrawal was too horrible? Who knows.

    I'm going to rest up this last day. Get my >>>> together and jump back into the real world tomorrow on day 5.
    Wow. I have heard bad things about benzo wd but I've never went through it. I would imagine that is why this doesn't feel as bad. You had a reference point and this will never hit that, although they say each wd is worse but clearly not counting the benzo and opiote difference.

    The wd I went through last year was my first and I think it made it easier not knowing what to expect but compared to other things, its not as bad as we think at the time. I tried to put it into reference ckmoardd to other things I want through such as 3rd degree burns, skin graphs. You know, we all have those things whether it's medical or some other major life event. It's nothing compared to what others are going through at the time.

    I'm sorry you have had sleep problems. That is annoying and I am lucky that until the last year, I haven't had that problem.

    Oh by the way, have you had ambien before? I'm sure you already know what I'm going to say but its a funny story anyways so I'll share, not to 'scare' you because just because I had this experience doesn't mean you will and it was funny, not scary LOL. I was prescribed this after my wd issues a little while later to help with sleep since I would wake up every single hour. I would easily go right back to sleep but I couldn't get quality sleep waking up 6 times a night so my doctor gave me ambien. He did warn me about the side effects and I did have someone watching me the first night, well you know... Just making sure I didn't burn the house down cooking ha-ha.

    I took it for 2 nights and lost 3 days worth of memory, no joke. Apparently I was sleep walking and doing laundry, doing house cleaning at night and my sister in law did wake up but said I was seemed fully awake so she didn't think anything of it the first night. Yeah, she's fired from that job! So the next day I guess I seemed really high and was in a trans. It was odd but not too bad according to what those around me said. I guess I took it again and then it was obviosly to them that I was not okay because I was trying to leave in my car at night. They had to hide the keys. I do not recall any of that and barely remember the 3rd day!

    So not a horror story but rather funny. I clearly cannot handle ambien BUT I have heard a lot of success with friends who are on it so it just depends. Definately worth a try right? Just make sure someone who knows what to look for can watch you. If your wife is a light sleeper then you're good. If you have already tried it, I apologize. I may have read it wrong.

    I can't believe tomorrow will be day 5 for you! Crazy huh?

  26. #86
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smith9666 View Post
    Wow. I have heard bad things about benzo wd but I've never went through it. I would imagine that is why this doesn't feel as bad. You had a reference point and this will never hit that, although they say each wd is worse but clearly not counting the benzo and opiote difference.

    The wd I went through last year was my first and I think it made it easier not knowing what to expect but compared to other things, its not as bad as we think at the time. I tried to put it into reference ckmoardd to other things I want through such as 3rd degree burns, skin graphs. You know, we all have those things whether it's medical or some other major life event. It's nothing compared to what others are going through at the time.

    I'm sorry you have had sleep problems. That is annoying and I am lucky that until the last year, I haven't had that problem.

    Oh by the way, have you had ambien before? I'm sure you already know what I'm going to say but its a funny story anyways so I'll share, not to 'scare' you because just because I had this experience doesn't mean you will and it was funny, not scary LOL. I was prescribed this after my wd issues a little while later to help with sleep since I would wake up every single hour. I would easily go right back to sleep but I couldn't get quality sleep waking up 6 times a night so my doctor gave me ambien. He did warn me about the side effects and I did have someone watching me the first night, well you know... Just making sure I didn't burn the house down cooking ha-ha.

    I took it for 2 nights and lost 3 days worth of memory, no joke. Apparently I was sleep walking and doing laundry, doing house cleaning at night and my sister in law did wake up but said I was seemed fully awake so she didn't think anything of it the first night. Yeah, she's fired from that job! So the next day I guess I seemed really high and was in a trans. It was odd but not too bad according to what those around me said. I guess I took it again and then it was obviosly to them that I was not okay because I was trying to leave in my car at night. They had to hide the keys. I do not recall any of that and barely remember the 3rd day!

    So not a horror story but rather funny. I clearly cannot handle ambien BUT I have heard a lot of success with friends who are on it so it just depends. Definately worth a try right? Just make sure someone who knows what to look for can watch you. If your wife is a light sleeper then you're good. If you have already tried it, I apologize. I may have read it wrong.

    I can't believe tomorrow will be day 5 for you! Crazy huh?
    Hey Oxyblues
    You can change your name now! Lol.
    About the Ambien---imho, stay away from drugs that rob you of 3 days of memory, like they did to Smith!! Although a prescription drug, who among us needs yet another day that we don't remember? Lol I also have heard the stories about sleep-walking. Could be dangerous--Smith's lucky she had family around. Some of us are alone and the consequences could be funny or sad!
    Congrats on your determination to do this! You will be better for it!
    Post when u can. Your experiences will help someone sitting on the fence about kicking pills....
    Do the good work!!

  27. #87
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    [deleted - swearing]
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-15-2016 at 01:40 PM.

  28. #88
    Smith9666 is offline Junior Member
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    Oxy


    How did last night go? I think your last post was deleted or something. I hope it went well.

  29. #89
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    Yes, it was deleted for one swear word. I should have read the rules.

    Anyway, I was sitting in bed feeling beat tired but mostly symptom free and that was day 4. I needed supplies so I got up and started getting ready to go get some food and a funny thing happened. I started gaining more and more energy. Next thing I know, I'm packing my things (I checked into a hotel for the withdrawals to spare my wife and kids from it all) then I find myself checking out of the hotel then getting a hair cut and bam I'm home! I wanted to share that because sometimes we have to FORCE ourselves to put one foot in front of the other even when our bodies and our minds are screaming NOOO don't do it!! This isn't like having the flu where it's always best to stay in bed until you feel better to rest up. Sometimes you have to get moving with this stuff.

    So I go home and of course my kids are thrilled to see me and I'm feeling pretty good at this point. Unfortunately, my wife wasn't as happy to see me. I'm afraid this might have been the straw that broke the camels back with her. I had a painkiller addiction 8 years ago resulting from my need to be on them for two months 24/7 after my auto accident (not my fault by the way). I broke my tibia plateau, knee needed reconstruction and ankle too. They had to put in 12 pins and an apparatus around my knee. Anyway, I don't know many who are going to not be addicted after that. Unfortunately, I milked that for about 3 years! So I quit that on my own by a slow taper years ago, but transferred to alcohol a few years later not even realizing what I was doing. Anyway, that didn't last as long and quit that too, but things happened while I was drinking as they invariably do. That lead to various offenses by both parties and I self medicated with these pills. Still, through all that crazy stuff I still love her dearly and want to be with her forever. But, it seems she doesn't and it's breaking my heart. Not sure what to do. I know I'm ready to stop being selfish but she claims to not have any love left for me, just best friends. It's horrible.

    The good news is I still managed to get myself up on time with around 4 hours of sleep again and make it to work. I felt great. As the day as has worn on I've tired out, but still much, much better than any other day! Just the wife thing on my mind is all.

    Also, I didn't take any gaba and stopped the benzo last night. Not sure how I eventually slept! I did get a tinge of residual wd type feeling and I do mean just a really small trivial amount and took a very small dose of gaba which hasn't seem to have effected me.

    Pretty sure I'm out of the woods!! But the battle isn't over. No free lunches here. I have a plan and it is to get myself in shape. It has nothing to do with looking good, and everything to do with being mentally happy. It's the only thing that has worked for me in the past. It's simply something I am going to have to do to be a functioning sober human. Ugh, there are worse things I guess than looking great because you'll die if you don't lol.

    Thanks again for the support everyone!!!!

  30. #90
    oxyblues is offline Member
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    How are you doing Smith??

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