Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 47
Like Tree11Likes
Methadon/Suboxone jump day 14>>>
  1. #1
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default Methadon/Suboxone jump day 14>>>

    Hi, im 32 and i've been doing a lot of reading on these forums and it has helped me quite a bit. I've decided to post about my experience more for myself than anything else and as a diary to myself and others how this went for me.

    Background:
    I had been on methadone for over 6 years at as high of doses as 120mg a day but recently the past couple of years I had gotten sick of feeling drugged and weighed down. So i brought myself down to around 20-30mg a day(getting them prescribed by a doctor so i could take what i wanted, not at a clinic). Until 3-4 months ago I had gotten enough of the feeling that i wasn't in control of my own life, depending on this chemical to feed my brain only to be able to function, with no benefits, only downsides. So i told my doctor to switch me to suboxone, not sure exactly what i planned on doing, just that i needed to do something to take control. He started me off on 24mg a day and i took that for maybe 2 days and decided i wasn't going to go down this road. I wouldnt really consider it a taper.... I just didn't take more than i needed, which for me, was 4mg a day in the morning. I was on that until i just made the jump 14 days ago.

    Reading the forums the week before and the week of my jump gave me some good ideas on ways to lessen certain symptoms of w/d and here is what i used.

    Immodium AD(A MUST for obvious reason)

    L-Tyrosine: (I take 3000mg when i wake up then wait an hour or so and take my vitamins before eating an orange)

    Xanax 1mg: (I was prescribed xanax for years but i'm just not a benzo person and never really taken them other than sparingly. I took 1mg/day for the first 7-10 days and then decided to stop. If you are inclined to abuse benzo's this could be dangerous)

    GNC multivitamin: (any multivitamin should work. I just happen to have some really expensive ones on my cabinet)

    Gabapentin: (i only took these a couple days on days 5-10 at 600mg/day before i read all the horror storied about them, so I stopped)

    (recalling from memory here so it may or may not sound as severe or light as the w/d symptoms actually were)
    Days 1-2: Almost no change as the subs were still in my system
    Days 3-5: These days were the worst, I felt like i wanted to just crawl down into my bed. RLS a huge problem and not much sleep. Immodium works amazingly.
    Days 6-14: It's there and it's annoying but it isn't terrible as far as direct acute withdrawal symptoms go. I still have no energy and don't really feel like doing anything. I keep waiting to feel "normal" but that hilarious because i don't even know what normal is and haven't known for 12 years. The moments come and go quickly, I sleep 6-7 hours a night with benadryl.

    If there is interest i will post a more detailed dairy from now on and keep checking in. I'm by no means downplaying any of my symptoms because they SUCKED so far and i still have quite a bit to go but I'm telling anyone that is miserable on methadone or suboxone that you don't have to live that way. If you are looking for more inspirational stories then search "plzfreeme"... After reading her thread it made me want to post my story because i too, have read all of the horror stories here and know for each individual, it was exactly THAT bad for them. I'm here to tell you that it might not be that bad for you. I wasn't on subs for long but the chemicals in my brain were just as messed up as anyone else from being on methadone for 7 years. So i guess this is a methadone detox with a suboxone "taper". I kind of took control on my own and did it my own way but there are many people who have experience and know the easiest way of coming off of these powerful drugs. The way i did it was best for me but a slower process might be better for you. I just felt going through a month or 2 of sever-ish w/d might be better than the slow process. Honestly, i was just done with it all...
    iloerose likes this.

  2. #2
    jana34 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    38

    Default

    Thank u for your post. Do u remember what your cows score was when u induced to subs or how long after your last dose of medicine

  3. #3
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by jana34 View Post
    Thank u for your post. Do u remember what your cows score was when u induced to subs or how long after your last dose of medicine
    I always took my methadone in the morning and i waited 48 hours before i took the suboxone to be safe. 2 days seems like plenty of time at the dose of methadone that i was on(30mg). I have been with my same doctor for the whole 7 years I have been on methadone and did a lot of research before i made the switch. My appt was Friday and i didn't go, even though it wouldn't have mattered since i have a full script of suboxone sitting in my drawer next to me. I'm just so over it and done with not being in control of my own body and of what these medicines do to your brain.

    Day 15 - It took a while for me to go to sleep last night... I finally fell asleep at about 4 am and slept until around 10 am. Still got good sleep and woke up refreshed. Had a decent day with not too much discomfort and even took a nap from 5pm-8pm which might spell trouble for me falling asleep tonight but i think i will be ok. The days are getting better but i still have no energy, but the RLS is pretty much completely gone. I still have moments during the day where i'm just "blah" but they come and go pretty quick when i start doing something. I didn't mention earlier that i'm an online gamer and that's one thing that's helped me keep my mind off of myself and stay busy along with watching the first 2 seasons of "Dexter". I've been in bed for 2 weeks and haven't really done any exercise but I'm starting to feel like I want to. It feels like i'm over the hump and things are getting better every day. I did take 2 gabapentin today which i haven't taken in 2 days. I refuse to take them on a daily basis because of the horror stories i have been reading. I think it's safe to take them every couple of days until i feel completely recovered and not have any repercussions. It's been 5 days with no xanax which i also have a full bottle of. I'm just to the point where i don't want to put anything in my body that's going to stop my brain from getting back to a state of homeostasis on it's own and producing the chemicals it has to without the need for a drug.

    By no means am i downplaying what i went through the past 2 weeks and what i continue to go through today and in the future... IT SUCKS.... but it's doable when you get in the mindset that you are just done with it all. Do some research on what these medicines do to your brain and it might scare you like it did me. The good news is, that your brain is a wonderful and powerful organ that CAN and WILL recover as long as you treat it like the valuable and precious organ that it is.
    Iluv2smile likes this.

  4. #4
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    2,537

    Default

    Thank you for posting.
    I too jumped from methadone to suboxone 6 months ago .
    Now tapering..
    How long were you on the sub?
    Your story is inspiring..
    This tapering seems long but there are so many that have done it successfully..
    So I will keep on..
    Team taper!
    Iluv2

  5. #5
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Iluv2smile View Post
    Thank you for posting.
    I too jumped from methadone to suboxone 6 months ago .
    Now tapering..
    How long were you on the sub?
    Your story is inspiring..
    This tapering seems long but there are so many that have done it successfully..
    So I will keep on..
    Team taper!
    Iluv2
    Hi there! Glad you posted and good to see you all over the place on these forums(been lurking for the past couple of weeks.. hehe). I was on subs for around 4 months, starting with 24mg for the first 3-4 days then quickly dropping myself down to 4mg-8mg for 2 months, then 4mg for the last 2 months. It's not so much of a taper as a buffer to rid my body of the methadone and detox CT from the subs as i have heard it isn't as bad. I was just fed up.... That's what it took for me... You do whatever it takes for you to get your life back and taper as slowly as you need to.
    Iluv2smile likes this.

  6. #6
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Day 16 - 10.am Last night wasn't that fun but wasn't all that bad either. As expected, i didn't get to sleep until around 5am probably due to taking a nap from 5pm-8pm the night before. I only slept 4 hours but i woke up feeling great. I live alone with no kids and own my place(the reason i'm able to pause my life right now and do this without consequence and thanks to being on such a low dose of methadone for a long time i was able to get my stuff together over the past 2 years... You could say my bottom happen a couple years ago when i had nothing and decided to stop "abusing" pills... Only taking what i needed to function at work.. but i digress). However, last night my sister and her 3 kids... and the 2 grandbabies decided to come have a slumber party over at my house. Over the past few years I have isolated myself so much that it was a surprise that i came out of my bedroom and sat in the living room to watch TV with them and play with the babies. It felt so good and may be part of the reason i'm "high" right now... on nothing... I miss having a life and being part of a loving family. My mother and sister also take methadone(10-20mg a day) but i'm hoping that them seeing me come out of this much better than before and get my life back will convince them to stop, especially my sister as i know she doesn't need them... My mother actually has back problems and just went through weight loss surgery but i'm sure she could do it too. I know this good feeling could pass any minute and i could have a rough day but i'm enjoying it while it's here. My sister even cooked breakfast for us all(bacon, eggs, biscuits.... not very healthy but meh...)... That was nice to wake up to....

  7. #7
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Day 17 - 8 am... Yesterday was one of the best days i've had in a very long time... Not only did they stay the night(sister said they were having a slumber party at my house). My family(sister, 4 kids, 2 grandbabies, mom, and dad(stopped by for a sec)) were here all day watching football games and cooking ribs, pork chops, beans, etc... I actually came out of my room again and sat with them again(which for me, is quite the shock... I usually just sit in my room on the computer). I guess my sister knew i needed it since they have seen what I have put myself through over these past 2 weeks to get myself back to normal. My mom also lives 2 doors down so she has been a big help in taking care of me. Trying to make me eat in the early days of w/d and going to the store to get vitamins when i really didn't feel like it. I went to sleep around 11pm after the football game with the help of 1 benadryl and woke up at 6am. I tossed and turned during the night(i think) but never fully woke up. I woke up today feeling good but just a little restless... Like i want to do something but don't know what to do. It's kind of a constant feeling at this point but isn't bad enough to say that I don't feel good. We will see how today goes and I know that the good feeling i had yesterday and today may only be temporary. Keeping that in mind will help if a wave of w/d symptoms comes and help me realize that I am doing better. It will help me realize that it's all temporary and the bad feelings will get fewer and farther between. I know i still have a long month or maybe even 2 ahead of me... Giving myself 2-3 months to feel "normal". That way i'm not surprised if it lasts 90 days or even longer.

    I have a question though, for all your health junkies and vitamin experts. As of right now, I'm taking 3 1000mg L-Tyrosine pills the second i wake up with a glass of water. Then waiting 30min-1hr before i take my GNC multivitamin with an orange or banana. I am eating as of the past 5 days so I don't think i am nutrient starved(not always the healthiest food but i don't think i'm eating terribly). My question is, does anyone think i need more vitamin B-6, B-12, and B-complex in me or any other vitamin you can think that i may need? Currently the amounts that are in these GNC vitamins seem like they are pretty good(they were expensive) and are as follows: B-6(50mg - 2500% DV)... B-12(50mcg - 833% DV) and a ton of other vitamins.

    I know that you can only absorb so much and the rest is just wasted. If anyone has any advice on vitamins or supplements that i could add to this i would appreciate it.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 08-05-2018 at 11:44 PM.

  8. #8
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    2,537

    Default

    I know exactly what you mean about isolating..
    My world became so small when I was on methadone..
    Now on the sub if I want to isolate I force myself to do the opposite of what I want to do.
    I am so afraid of the sub turning on me like the methadone eventually did..
    About the vitamins .
    There is so much controversy.
    I actually took withdrawal ease for the last months on methadone.
    Because methadone creates like a sludge through out the colon that is why the constipation and as a result there is minimal vitamins and mineral absorption.
    I know some of the people that have been helping me take
    Multi vitamin ( I take gummies because I don't always eat in the am)
    I can take those on an empty stomach
    Essentional amino acids
    Magnesium, zinc,potassium supplement
    Tyrosine up to 4000mg a day for energy
    B6 b12 ( b6 helps the tyrosine absorb)
    Benadryl for sleep
    Valerian root for sleep..
    I feel pretty good most of the time .
    So for now I will keep doing the same thing
    I really changed my eating to less sugar
    Vegetables and fruits
    Lots of kale smoothies

    I have been spending time with my kids and grandkids too it is so much fun...
    I feel like I missed a lot ..
    Those years on methadone but I can't get them back .
    I can only enjoy every day ..
    Kids really teach you how to live in the moment.
    My granddaughters are 3 and 5.
    You are doing so good..
    This was the best piece advice I got..
    Do the opposite of what I want because when we give in to the isolation or anything negative we are feeding the depression and disease..
    100% true
    It does get easier..
    Have a great day
    Iluv2
    Last edited by Anonymous; 12-15-2014 at 01:16 PM. Reason: Spelling

  9. #9
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Day 17 - 2 pm... Wtf? I feel amazing, even better than yesterday. I feel higher than any day i was on methadone or suboxone. What did i change today? Protein shake.... Can it really be that simple? The protein shake i drank 4 hours ago has me feeling great and has been for the past few hours. I mean, AMAZING. I don't know if it's replaced the amino acids i have been lacking for the past weeks(It has 18 amino acids including L-Tryptophan(600mg, naturally occuring, not added), Tyrosine(1200mg), Leucine(4000mg) etc, etc)... I was considering going to buy some 5-HTP but it seems if i drink 2 shakes a day i should get plenty of Tryptophan. This could just be a coincidence and i could feel like >>>> later or tomorrow but the ONLY thing that has changed from today and yesterday or any day before is the addition of the protein shake. I have nothing else entering my body besides the L-tyrosine(3000mg) and my GNC multivitamins. It can't be that simple... can it? I know this isn't some amazing discovery but I AM AMAZED at the results. I want to go for a run but it's raining. Yet i'm not anxious at all... It's a good feeling to feel this way and realize that i CAN be normal and feel good without drugs.

    Iluv2 - Yeah, it's a good feeling to be around family and enjoy it.... truly enjoy it, not put on your mask and pretend like you are all good... The babies i have are a little younger than yours, as they are my sisters grandbabies since i have no kids. They are 2-3 months and 1 year old... But they are just like mine since i have raised all 4 of my sisters kids as their father figure since theirs weren't around. I think i have settled on what i need as far as supplements and i'll just stick with the L-tyro and multivitamin in the morning, protein shake between meals at around 10am, another multivitamin with lunch, another protein shake around 3-4pm, then dinner. I have no problem eating at this point.. Although they say no red meat... those pork chops and ribs were SOOOO good, lol. I also picked up a bottle of melatonin with the protein powder. The bendryl just wasn't doing the trick. I'll discontinue the melatonin in a week or 2. I don't want to depend on ANYTHING. I am determined to get my body back to a state where it is in control of itself and doesn't need ANYTHING. Except maybe some protein shakes after i work out and multivitamins
    Iluv2smile likes this.

  10. #10
    jana34 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    38

    Default

    Thanks for posting your day to day progress. It's inspiring to read about your ups and downs. Along with the nutritional supplements and such that you use. I guess I never realized what a large role nutrition plays. (Though I should, had a couples bad illnesses while in methadone and last year I got shingles, I was thinking what the hell I'm 33, I was down for about 2 months all together, I had blood drawn at the time and found out I was malnourished) So I enjoy seeing what other people who've been on opiates have found out about nutrition and what works for them.
    So thanks for that along with your day to day feelings and motivations. It's awesome to read.

  11. #11
    jana34 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    38

    Default

    Oh yeah. Are u allowed to mention the brand name of the protein shake you're drinking? I just found a protein powder in the back of my cabinet that has 8 amino acids. Oh dear lol, it's a full year past its expiration. Oh well I'm sure its safe just maybe less potent in vitamins.

  12. #12
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Day 18- 10 am... Last night i took a melatonin and a benadryl at 10pm, then another melatonin at 11pm. I fell asleep shortly after and woke up at 7am with no tossing and turning during the night and feeling rested(i don't EVER remember my dreams and never have.. so sleep for me is a "go to sleep, wake up" thing). I feel great again this morning and am hoping that it isn't temporary. My dad came by yesterday and asked if i wanted to go for a walk, which was out of nowhere(I didn't feel like going that second but wanted to go later... but it was raining). I told him we would go today, so today i will start back on my workouts. There was a time while i was on methadone toward the end on low doses that i was big into nutrition and working out. I did a lot of research on the right way to work out, the right foods to eat, etc. Today i will run/jog/walk 2 miles while doing push-ups after every lap around the track. I'm not in terrible shape and the motivation of the weight i've lost so far during this 2 weeks is refreshing(I can actually see my abs again.. yay). Other than that, there isn't really much to write about... Things are good.

    Jana - It's definitely "safe" and won't harm you but the nutritional value is probably next to nothing in a protein powder expired by that much. It's cheap and can be found at any store... This is the one i use and it was $20 and was buy 1 get 1 half price. http://www.amazon.com/Body-Fortress-...chocolate+whey

    I guess i am very fortunate that i have such a great immune system(i haven't had the flu in 10 years or even a runny nose... I just don't get sick) and that my body seems to recover fairly quick. I really feel for people who are always sick and can't imagine having to deal with that on top of an addiction.

    I forgot to mention before that i also discontinued my Paxil(10mg), 3 days ago. I was on it for a couple months and have been on it before. I stopped taking it before with no problems, so i figured i wouldn't have any w/d symptoms this time either since i was on it for longer last time. It's also been a week without any xanax(used in the beginning but i'm not a benzo person, so i felt fairly safe taking it for a very short time). Nothing foreign is entering my body as of right now besides a little imodium and the supplements that i am taking. I feel confident that the worst is over and by treating my body like a "temple", that i will be fine. The main reason I want to stop EVERYTHING foreign entering my body is in 90 days I want to be able to TRULY diagnose myself on how i feel without anything even remotely affecting it or having side effects. The body is a wonderful machine and most of the things we take a pill for, the body would work out on its on in time(I know not everyone can do this and i'd never suggest stopping a medication that you need unless you talk to a doctor about it). It seems nutrition is playing a huge part in my recovery and i'd suggest anyone who isn't doing these things, to do it... It can't hurt...

  13. #13
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    I forgot to mention that i take 2 scoops of the protein powder mixed with 12 oz of milk(water works fine too but less protein) for a total of 70g of protein and all types of other goodies. Drinking it now(10:30am), let's hope it has the same result as yesterday...
    Last edited by Anonymous; 12-16-2014 at 11:36 AM.

  14. #14
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Ok, so jana... Let me retract my statement about the protein powder. After doing a bit of research because i was curious... I found that it's very controversial and there isn't a right answer. The protein itself in the powder doesn't lose potency but the fact that whey protein is made from milk can lead to the protein powder spoiling and causing all types of things. The general consensus is that protein powder is "ok" after the expiration date as long as it doesn't smell funny or have any moisture in it that caused mold. I still say the best bet is to toss it out and get some more...

  15. #15
    jana34 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    38

    Default

    Thanks gotti. Lol I got a new one from heb . It has 18 amino acids though lower levels (like a third of the tryptophan ). I've got a chest cold and abscessed tooth and started the z pack bout 2 days ago so I'm also taking a probiotic. A couple years back I got serious into eating right. Mostly vegetarian and doing yoga everyday and at the time I trimmed way down and felt more energy and alive than I had felt well...ever. but I was still on methadone. So feeling this cruddy I've really caught the bug to do everything I can just to get right. How are you doing today? Still on the up and up? I really hope u skip past paws altogether and just keep improving.

  16. #16
    jana34 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    38

    Default

    Did u say u got out and got some exercise? How did that feel

  17. #17
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Day 19 - 12pm... Yesterday was another great day... My dad came over(he is 66 yrs old) at about 11am and we went and got some excercise. We jogged/walked a little over a mile and it felt great. I drank a protein shake about 30 minutes before and immediately ate a good meal of turkey and broccoli afterwards to get the much needed nutrients to my muscles and body when it is most willing to take them and use them for good. I believe nutrition is playing a huge part in me feeling how good i feel and my body repairing itself so fast. I feel zero side effects from the w/d's aside from having to take something at night to fall asleep(melatonin atm) but my sleep is excellent. Last night, i went to bed at around 11pm and woke up at 9am with zero interuptions in sleep. Today i woke up refreshed and my dad has already come over for our jog/walk. We did another mile today and i came home immediately to cook myself some Tilapia(fish) and broccoli. I'm so full and feel amazing right now. I know it may get annoying to some people hearing how good i feel after 19 days while some people struggle through months of feeling like >>>> but i feel it's important to let people know that it isn't always a horror story(while the first week was exactly that, i got over it) and if you treat your body well, that it will recover a lot faster. But who knows, i may feel like >>>> tomorrow and for the whole week next week. I'm not worried about that because i'm focused on doing everything i can to take care of myself and feel good RIGHT NOW. If PAWS comes, i will deal with it then. This is what is working for me and it may or may not have the same results for you but it can't hurt to baby yourself and your body. I feel better than i have in 10+ years and i don't plan on stopping what i'm doing.

    Jana - That sucks to hear about your illnesses and it's important that you seperate that from your induction. Heck, blame it all on the illnesses... I had a seemingly flawless transition when i switched and had zero side affects or w/d symptoms. The subs should take ALL of that away after a day or 2. So most likely you feel like >>>> because you are sick. The main reason it's important to seperate them is because most people feel a lot better on very low doses of subs and if you start taking more in hopes of feeling better, it will just make the process of tapering that much longer. Most people can feel completely fine on 4-8mg of subs or even lower(i was on 4mg for 2-3 months before jumping). I, too, went on a huge health kick when i was on methadone and even got my 6-pack back but i didn't feel nearly as good as i do now. After 2 days of excercise and eating right for the past week I feel amazing.. Way better than i did any day on the methadone. It can't hurt, right? I know it can be a pain in the butt to eat right and make yourself get up and excersice but it will definitely pay off. I actually enjoy most of the high protein foods and veggies(fish, chicken breasts, broccoli, etc) so it isn't that hard for me. I will continue to post up to and maybe past my 30 day mark because it is pretty therapeutic for me and if it helps 1 person have an easier w/d period by babying their body then it will be all worth it. I would love to hear from anyone that is feeling better after doing some of the things that i have done. I kind of start to think... Am i that different? I abused my body just as much as the next person and if I can feel this good after 2 weeks(day 14 and on is when i really started to feel "good") then other people should be able to do the same. I know our bodies are all different and i'm waiting for this good feeling to end like i read in so many other posts.... but after 5 days straight of feeling pretty good, I am hopeful that it's not just an up-swing and that this will be my "normal".

  18. #18
    jana34 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    38

    Default

    That's awesome to hear. I definitely believe in the ability of our bodies to be able to balance out and the role that nutrition and exercise and other natural things play. That said it's been easy to convince myself I'd never fell normal again when going through withdrawal. I stepped off methadone at only 15 mgs at one point and when I started to feel worse each day round day 7 I ended up relapsing at day 9 or so just really needing to be able to get back to work. I tried again a week later or so and only made it a few days. Went back to methadone.
    It does wonders to be able to read a success story. Your experience hasn't been painless but it's positive proof what can be done. I definitely take inspiration from it and plan to come back and read it again when I finally taper off subs. I'm sure I'm only one of many.
    Oh can I ask are u working? And did u take 1 or 2 weeks off.

  19. #19
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by jana34 View Post
    That's awesome to hear. I definitely believe in the ability of our bodies to be able to balance out and the role that nutrition and exercise and other natural things play. That said it's been easy to convince myself I'd never fell normal again when going through withdrawal. I stepped off methadone at only 15 mgs at one point and when I started to feel worse each day round day 7 I ended up relapsing at day 9 or so just really needing to be able to get back to work. I tried again a week later or so and only made it a few days. Went back to methadone.
    It does wonders to be able to read a success story. Your experience hasn't been painless but it's positive proof what can be done. I definitely take inspiration from it and plan to come back and read it again when I finally taper off subs. I'm sure I'm only one of many.
    Oh can I ask are u working? And did u take 1 or 2 weeks off.
    Well, that's one difference from me and a lot of others. I am VERY fortunate that i am able to just pause my life to take care of myself. I am a single 32 yr old male that owns my place and vehicle. It wasn't without work and shows what can be accomplished with methadone/subs over taking all those other pills. Over the past 2-3 years(when i decided to stop abusing the methadone and only take what i needed) I was able to get a great job and be fairly successful. 2 years ago, i had nothing.... Methadone saved my life, when i let it. So fast forward to now, I got laid off a couple of weeks ago, which was completely fine with me. Since my unemployment check is double what i need to pay my very few bills. I am also SOOOO excited for what's ahead for me, since I have a test/training scheduled for March 1st that i had to pay a couple thousand dollars for. This certification will allow me to double my pay and move up into the 6 figures. When i got laid off, I had already had the certification paid for and scheduled, so i wasn't upset at all at the lay-off since my time at that job would have been limited to a few months anyways since I would be getting a new job in march. I know that i am very fortunate in this regard and it has allowed me for a pretty smooth w/d on my own terms. It's important that people do WHATEVER it takes to get better though... If it takes taking a month off from work, then do it. I know some people will be like "yea ok, I can't do that" but there is always a way, no matter how hard you think it might be. You have years ahead of you once you get clean and you will be farther ahead in your journey in a year than you ever could dream on the pills. So, while my circumstances worked out perfectly that by the time i take my certification I will be around 90 days clean and looking at a very bright future, it may not be that smooth for you but it's possible.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 12-17-2014 at 06:16 PM.

  20. #20
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    EDIT - I didn't mention much about my past before methadone but it was just as bad as the next person. I lived in a place where i could easily go to 3 doctors a DAY and get 120 lorcet 10's, 120 soma, 90 xanax 2mg. I was literally taking handfuls of pills at a time all day for about 5 years and this is why i say methadone saved my life. I was taking enough soma's to stop my heart every day and feel fortunate that i am still here. I also sold tons of them and could have easily ended up in jail also. After a couple years of methadone i had enough and lowered my dose to 20-30mg from over 100mg(which i was on for over 3 years while still taking soma's). Just a little extra background that i hadn't covered before the methadone

  21. #21
    jana34 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    38

    Default

    That's awesome. I too prepared for this and stock piled extra bill money and yeah the only reason I could was because at the time I was not abusing the methadone and worked toward a higher income too. (The biggest difficulty was coming clean to my boss that I needed a few days off this month to do this, but he knew way in advance, and he will benefit by having me able to devote myself more permanently )
    I moved here for this job and have been driving 4 hrs away to the clinic twice a month for 6 months. Taking two days off in a row each time to make the round trip. And hiding from the clinic that I was living elsewhere.
    Thanks for the extra background. I had some bad years of abusing soma and xanax and alcohol while on high doses of done too. So I'm extra encouraged to see u making such leaps and bounds after that. I bet every emotion and feeling and clarity of thought feels so good right now.
    Good luck on your upcoming job and keep up the exercise and nutrition. I hope you experience renewed passion and motivation for all things that were once dulled down.

  22. #22
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Day 20 - 10 am. Had a good day for the rest of the day yesterday but had a little trouble falling asleep even with the melatonin(10mg). I took them at 10pm and fell asleep around 12pm. I did sleep well and didn't wake up until 7am so i'm not complaining too much. The only side effects I am still feeling are the insomnia and bathroom problems, although i did go 2 days without taking imodium and didn't have much trouble, I took a small amount of imodium this morning. I woke up feeling kind of "blah" this morning but after taking my L-tyrosine(3000mg) with a bottle of water, then eating a banana 30 minutes later, then drinking a protein shake an hour after the banana, I feel good. My dad just called me for our walk and i had all intentions of canceling due to my legs being a little sore(You hardly ever want to work out a sore muscle, It's repairing itself and you want to let your body go to work rebuilding and making that muscle stronger). So i answered the phone and he said he was on his way and i said "ok". I guess just walking with no jogging won't hurt too much and will get me out of the house. I don't know if it's the supplements that lifted my mood enough to where I'm wanting to go for our walk but i sure didn't feel like going before I drank my protein shake. I can't stress how much supplementing has appeared to help me through this process and don't want to push something on people that they don't want to do but i'm amazed at the progress that i've made and it's seemingly all due to supplementing. There was no change in my condition until i started them. Sure, i'm not 100% and i'm not pretending like everything is GREAT but... it's good. I'm moving on and starting to get into a good positive routine of working out, eating right, and supplementing. It's been 6 days since i started this process and every day has been good. The minor symptoms i still have are just that... minor. They will disappear all together soon and i'll be left with my "normal". I'd like to thank my family also as i intend to let them read this after this process is over. I have such a great and supportive family and i enjoyed my sister, the 4 kids, the 2 grandkids, mom, and dad last sunday(mom and dad been divorced for my whole life but they are both a huge part of my life and get along well enough). I enjoyed last sunday so much that i invited them all back this sunday to cook and watch football again. This is unheard of for me because I am the one always in my room on my computer.... and i mean ALWAYS. Never coming out of my room to even say hi when i had company.

    lol... ok, so... My dad just walked in and started talking about how sore he was so I went ahead and told him we would skip today walking, about how you shouldn't work out a sore muscle and he was more than happy to skip today. Although i'm not skipping today's workout entirely.. I will instead, do some push-ups and some other upper body workouts. Keep in mind, that when i say "workout" i'm not talking about a full hour intense workout that a bodybuilder would do. I'm talking, a light, slow, and easy workout that anyone could do. Again, this is what's working for me and it may or may not be what's best for you, you can only try your best and hope for positive results however you decide to make this journey.

  23. #23
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Day 21 - 12:30 pm... Well, there isn't much to say without being repitive but here goes. I had a great rest of the day yesterday and had company last night. My sister and the 2 youngest kids( 12yr and 8yr old) came over late last night just to get away from all the chaos at their house. My nephew(12yr old) wanted to stay the night , so he did. Mainly because i have a huge big screen and the internet for him to play on. My niece and the grandbaby came over also today and i would have never thought that i would enjoy them coming over so much. It's not that i DIDN'T enjoy or want them to come over before but it was sort of irrelevent and i didn't care if they were here because i wouldn't even come out of my room. We have a really close family and they know that what's mine is theirs if they need anything. That's just the type of person i am, even with strangers, to an extent. I went to sleep around 12 pm and woke up refreshed at 8am with the same routine that has been successful over the past 6 days, L-tyro(3000mg) upon waking up, a yogurt 30 mins later, and a protein shake 30 minutes after that. Feeling good and it seems with 6 consecutive days of feeling good that this just isn't a phase and the nutrition has to have a lot to do with it. I don't doubt that i may get PAWS in the future but if i can go a week with feeling like i have been then i welcome a bad feeling here and there. It's natural and noone feels great ALL the time... The weather is so >>>>>> right now, it's pouring down raining, so i guess my run will be canceled again today. My dad couldn't come anyways because he is halfway to Dallas(6 hour drive) to buy a 74' el camino. He also has a 67' corvette(omg so fine and worth a ton) and has had tons of classic cars in the past. We once drove all the way to pensylvannia to a car show(I live in louisiana). So i will have to either use today as a rest day from working out or do some upper body stuff. Anyways, time to go cook me some fish and enjoy the rest of my day.

  24. #24
    jana34 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    38

    Default

    Ok so I hate to put a ridiculous question on your thread but u seem to be doing so well after such a long long time of dependence on long acting opiods. That said, why the l tyrosine? And when did u start taking it? I have a bottle of l glutamine capsules (really expensive too!) That I bought about 6 months ago in an I'll fated effort to try to replace I don't know, whatever I thought was missing in my head. I think I may have read about it while looking up the thomas recipe or something. Anyhow I tried it for 2 or 3 days expecting nothing really. And well I got very very anxious while taking it. Almost panicky. Like very distracted and scared. So why the tyrosine ? Is it similar to the glutamine? I've just never heard of it.

  25. #25
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by jana34 View Post
    Ok so I hate to put a ridiculous question on your thread but u seem to be doing so well after such a long long time of dependence on long acting opiods. That said, why the l tyrosine? And when did u start taking it? I have a bottle of l glutamine capsules (really expensive too!) That I bought about 6 months ago in an I'll fated effort to try to replace I don't know, whatever I thought was missing in my head. I think I may have read about it while looking up the thomas recipe or something. Anyhow I tried it for 2 or 3 days expecting nothing really. And well I got very very anxious while taking it. Almost panicky. Like very distracted and scared. So why the tyrosine ? Is it similar to the glutamine? I've just never heard of it.
    nono, no question is ridiculous... L-gluta and L-tyro are both non essential amino acids that your body converts into protein and other good stuffs to help your body heal. I hadn't tried the l-gluta but read up on it . I started taking L-tyro around day 5 of my w/d and I basically use it like a cup of coffee since i don't drink it. Some people do report that using either supplement makes them jittery and anxious, so all i can really advise is that you try it and see how it works for you. I will stop taking it once this bottle is used up. I mainly used it for those peak days where I KNEW my body wasn't getting the nutrition it needed and needed a little help. If you are eating good enough and your body has plenty amino acids then taking more will just up the levels and have a possibly negative effect(maybe not negative but side effects like jittery and anxious). I am eating very healthy at this point(just had 3 salmon burgers(70g protein) and some green beans) so I am sure my body will be making enough of these amino acids so that i won't really need any supplements. I do enjoy the little boost of energy and mood the l-tyro is still giving me though. That being said, I have read that you are supposed to cycle any amino acid you take due to tolerence(3 weeks on, 1 week off type of thing).

    The short answer to your question is that everyone is different and all you can do is try the supplements. If they don't have a positive effect then you can just stop taking them with no harm done. So i figured, why not? I read a lot of threads where L-tyro boosted peoples mood and energy and that's exactly what it did for me.

    Disclaimer that i always like to put when i give "advice" - Keep in mind that i'm not a nutritionist and everything i know about working out and giving my body what it needs came from hours and hours of research online. I'm just sharing my experience and what i "think" i know.

    But besides that, how are you feeling jana? You should be pretty stable now and feeling a little better. What mg did you decide to stabilize yourself at?

  26. #26
    jana34 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    38

    Default

    Wow. Thank you for the informative and thoughtful reply I thought I had done a ton of research on the glutamine at the time (the insomniac hours while dropping my methadone dose and just looking for any hope) but I didn't know anything about the cycling on or off of supplements and stopping at the 3 week point. If I pick up the l-tyro it will be at the end of a sub taper. I had conveniently forgotten the role of exercise and nutrition in a person's well being. Physically and emotionally. I think you're a testament to that right now. At one point I did yoga, ate a highly raw diet, mostly vegetarian, even grew sprouts and organic vegetables. I was on methadone at that time but it was the most alert and healthy and energetic I'd ever been. So I can sort of imagine what awaits if I get to the end of this road treating my body right.
    As for how I'm doing I put a post on my thread for anyone who comes along in the future but basically For the last couple days I've dosed at 8 mg in the morning then 4 later for a total of 12. The first 3 or 4 days were rough and sleep was lousy. I think I was still feeling the methadone coming out of me. I don't know but it doesn't really matter. Tomorrow I'm going to try 4 mg in the morning then 4 later. I should think I can get by just fine on that. I just want to be as close to a taper as possible. My main worry is going back to work tomorrow. I tattoo and it's just one of those jobs where u really need your head right. It's in no way labor intensive but I have to be quick and creative on demand. I can put a super clean well done smooth and saturated tattoo on the skin easy...but the hard part is drawing a piece, the choices in composition, style, placement...what's super cool for one guy may be super stupid for another. I'm nervous I'll get the equivalent of writer's block I guess. But I guess I'll find out. Good thing is my cold is clearing up. Eeek I hope I feel normal at work. Competent.
    Sorry for the long post. I look forward to reading the milestones you and others in this forum reach. And hopefully I get a bit of wisdom, a good bit of info, and a first hand perspective along the way. Take care you.

  27. #27
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Day 22 - 2pm... Had a good rest of the day yesterday, playing games with my friends online and went to bed around 1pm but the first break in my routine caused for an.... interesting... morning. My nephew stayed the night with me again last night and he comes in my room at 5am saying someone is banging on the door crying. Some drunk guy that spoke no english other than "call 911" came to my house. At first I thought there was maybe a wreck or someone was hurt, so i let him in and called the police, asking for a spanish speaking operator. After he spoke with the operator, the operator told me what he was saying. That his brother went crazy and hit him. No doubt it was just 2 drunk brothers arguing but I let him sit in my living room anyways until the cops showed up. Once they came, they took him outside and talked to him. They ended up leaving after going to the guys house, i think. The guy even came back to my house about 30 minutes later, i think to ask to use the phone again, which really made me mad. I told him to leave now and he did. I don't drink and I have zero tolerence for people that drunk, especially ones that come wake me and my nephew up at 5am. So, that started my morning off bad and for some reason my stomach issues were worse than they have been for 2 weeks, even with the imodium. I did break my "healthy" routine this morning and went to got me and my nephew Mcdonalds but i'm not sure if that's the reason or if it's something i ate yesterday. I decided to take .5mg of xanax to put myself back to sleep and kind of have another chance at starting my day over. I was never a benzo person and hadn't taken any in almost 2 weeks, so i don't think it's a problem for me to take such a small dose here and there. I did still do my morning routine of supplements and then a protein shake around 9am and fell back asleep around 10pm, waking up at 1pm. Despite the rough morning i feel good and my stomach isn't bothering me too much as of now. I just ate another 3 salmon burgers and green beens(this is the only thing different i ate yesterday than previous days, so i hope that isn't what has my stomach upset. I don't see why it would). But all in all, the stomach issues are just a minor annoyance causing the past 7 great days to turn this day to just a "good" day. I'm not going to let something this small ruin my mood and day. I have a good weekend planned and I have to go shopping today for the food we are going to cook tomorrow since i invited my family over. I'm so looking forward to tomorrow and spending time with my family, which if you read any previous post, it's such a huge change for me.

    Jana - That's awesome to hear that you are able to have a career that you actually love, as i assume it's pretty much a dream job for anyone that loves tattoo's and is creative and talented enough to get paid to do it. Not many people can say they are that lucky. I definitely think that you will feel much better as the methadone and the illness leaves your body. I had a rough morning as you can read but it doesn't have me down... I am still happy and motivated to keep on doing what I am doing. I think one of the big reasons that this is so easy for me is that I was more of dependent than addicted. Hell, I still have 90 subs in my drawer and also have a bottle full of methadone(I am my sisters pharmacist because she can't trust herself not to take more than 10mg a day, so she leaves them here with me). Don't get me wrong, I definitely WAS addicted back when i was taking hand fulls of the short acting opiates, chasing the high. But the 7 years on methadone slowly changed that behavior and part of my mind. I have 0 cravings to get high and havent for a long time. So, i guess that's one of the reasons the supplementing and nutrition is working so well. Because that's the only part that i need to fix, is my body. I'm not sure why i added that but i guess it's to give hope to people that think there is no end to this and they will always crave the drugs. I am no better than anyone else and I know exactly what you are going through.

  28. #28
    jana34 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    38

    Default

    Wow you had a crazy morning. So bizarre. Kind of made me laugh, it's just so random. It's awesome you are playing games online with pals and so active in your family right now. I too have nieces and a nephew and I don't live close right now but I haven't been involved in so long I feel guilty. It seems like u are truly enjoying having an active role in your family. I hope u have a rad weekend with them. That's the kind of normal stuff I hope to be doing in the future. I feel like I have such a long way to go.
    I dig reading what u eat and supplement and exercise. It's something I never took serious but your testimony is first hand experience of what can be accomplished.
    The point of view u have about your dependence and not addiction. I like hearing it. It's so different. But I remember feeling that way towards the end of a methadone detox. No cravings or thoughts of using, just body withdrawals n symptoms. But that's not where I'm at now. No way will I use an opiate. But I do feel like a hopeless adict that has a long road ahead.
    You're right about my job. I'm truly blessed though I worked very very hard and went through more than a couple years of apprenticeships, a year of bartending once when all my gear was stolen. And countless job changes as my skills progressed. I was always flat broke and much of the time earning only 50 dollars a week at slow shops. The chain to the clinic prevented me from moving to better opportunities. At one point I had 2 job offers that were major opportunities that I simply could not take cause I couldn't afford the move or the travel to the clinic from further distances. So I existed working at overcrowded low priced hood shops. (Maybe something came of that too though,I'm very versed in black and grey hood style tattoos, catholic symbolism, memorial tattoos for homies (I'm not poking fun), and of course lettering.i can do so many custom styles of lettering to fit any part of the body. So experience came from being on the bottom for so long. It's funny I still do a lot of lettering here but a major portion of what I do is tiny tattoos brought in on young girl's cell phones of hip images they obtained from pinterest. I'm not complaining. I treat everyone and their ideas with respect and I'm grateful to get to do what I do. Sorry so long. I should have thrown this bit about me on my thread. But yes I'm really blessed to have hung in there and make a living. A very meager one right now but I have a lot of bills and I stay ahead of them all. It's weird it's one of those jobs that requires passion and for a long time though I respect the craft and tattoo clean I had lost my passion and drive to grow or create and learn new styles or techniques. It's not quite back yet all the way but hey I'm still fighting a cold and struggling to stabilize.
    I sketched out a sleeve for tomorrow (took me forever) and did a medium sized very intricate technically challenging tattoo today. I was super weak. Even had to brace my arms but it came out clean. Just took me a lot longer to do.but I don't feel incompetent. And I did it, that's what matters. I can work through this.
    You said u played games online yesterday. I had just got a ps4 a couple months ago and it's pretty cool but I haven't had the desire or Interest or focus whatsoever to play yet. At what point after your jump from subs were u able to get interested in that again. This seems so trivial. I won't be offended if u don't respond.
    I've been thinking a lot about your last post stating how u only felt physically dependent, not like an active addict (even given your lengthy history of use). I don't take offense.(yes I'm envious though) You just seem so strong and determined, so matter of fact and logical. Having benzoes during detox and not touching them for 2 weeks even though u were withdrawing says volumes. That's just unheard of. I keep rereading that part of your post. Your mindset. Your will. Thank u for posting it. Sorry I put too much of my personal on your thread. Also am I right to assume u are not and never were the na or aa type meeting person?

  29. #29
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by jana34 View Post
    Wow you had a crazy morning. So bizarre. Kind of made me laugh, it's just so random. It's awesome you are playing games online with pals and so active in your family right now. I too have nieces and a nephew and I don't live close right now but I haven't been involved in so long I feel guilty. It seems like u are truly enjoying having an active role in your family. I hope u have a rad weekend with them. That's the kind of normal stuff I hope to be doing in the future. I feel like I have such a long way to go.
    I dig reading what u eat and supplement and exercise. It's something I never took serious but your testimony is first hand experience of what can be accomplished.
    The point of view u have about your dependence and not addiction. I like hearing it. It's so different. But I remember feeling that way towards the end of a methadone detox. No cravings or thoughts of using, just body withdrawals n symptoms. But that's not where I'm at now. No way will I use an opiate. But I do feel like a hopeless adict that has a long road ahead.
    You're right about my job. I'm truly blessed though I worked very very hard and went through more than a couple years of apprenticeships, a year of bartending once when all my gear was stolen. And countless job changes as my skills progressed. I was always flat broke and much of the time earning only 50 dollars a week at slow shops. The chain to the clinic prevented me from moving to better opportunities. At one point I had 2 job offers that were major opportunities that I simply could not take cause I couldn't afford the move or the travel to the clinic from further distances. So I existed working at overcrowded low priced hood shops. (Maybe something came of that too though,I'm very versed in black and grey hood style tattoos, catholic symbolism, memorial tattoos for homies (I'm not poking fun), and of course lettering.i can do so many custom styles of lettering to fit any part of the body. So experience came from being on the bottom for so long. It's funny I still do a lot of lettering here but a major portion of what I do is tiny tattoos brought in on young girl's cell phones of hip images they obtained from pinterest. I'm not complaining. I treat everyone and their ideas with respect and I'm grateful to get to do what I do. Sorry so long. I should have thrown this bit about me on my thread. But yes I'm really blessed to have hung in there and make a living. A very meager one right now but I have a lot of bills and I stay ahead of them all. It's weird it's one of those jobs that requires passion and for a long time though I respect the craft and tattoo clean I had lost my passion and drive to grow or create and learn new styles or techniques. It's not quite back yet all the way but hey I'm still fighting a cold and struggling to stabilize.
    I sketched out a sleeve for tomorrow (took me forever) and did a medium sized very intricate technically challenging tattoo today. I was super weak. Even had to brace my arms but it came out clean. Just took me a lot longer to do.but I don't feel incompetent. And I did it, that's what matters. I can work through this.
    You said u played games online yesterday. I had just got a ps4 a couple months ago and it's pretty cool but I haven't had the desire or Interest or focus whatsoever to play yet. At what point after your jump from subs were u able to get interested in that again. This seems so trivial. I won't be offended if u don't respond.
    I've been thinking a lot about your last post stating how u only felt physically dependent, not like an active addict (even given your lengthy history of use). I don't take offense.(yes I'm envious though) You just seem so strong and determined, so matter of fact and logical. Having benzoes during detox and not touching them for 2 weeks even though u were withdrawing says volumes. That's just unheard of. I keep rereading that part of your post. Your mindset. Your will. Thank u for posting it. Sorry I put too much of my personal on your thread. Also am I right to assume u are not and never were the na or aa type meeting person?
    Please don't feel that way about posting whatever you want on my thread. I asked about how you were doing and since you are the only one active on my thread besides me, your replies are much appreciated and stimulate my thoughts. I know a lot of people lurk as i did for the first 2 weeks of my detox but replies are very welcomed. This thread wouldn't be nearly what it is without your thoughts and questions. When someone takes the time to read the whole thing they will get so much more out of it because of you.

    As far as the gaming goes... I have always been a pretty hardcore gamer, so i'm a little different than most. I have been playing World of Warcraft for like 5 years off and on now. It's a pretty mentally demanding game and i love it. It makes you think a lot and it's a very social game(think 25 people on voice chat all working together to accomplish something, if you don't know much about WoW). I have made some great friends on it and i enjoy it. During the first week or so of my detox I didn't really have the focus or want to play much although i still logged on periodically when i was bored to pass a little time. It was and still is a great tool in my arsenal to keep me occupied during this time. If it's something you can get into and enjoy then i would suggest it. It's a safe and cheap hobby that gets you thinking and your brain stimulated. If you wanna try WoW out let me know and i will get you started(its a computer game though). lol...

    I'm glad to hear that you didn't have a completely horrible day at work and I think that as your mind and body clears up from the methadone you will be that much more sucessful in your tattooing and i enjoy hearing how you are doing so make your post however long you want on "my" thread. Honestly, I don't consider it my thread because it's here for everyone and anyone that needs it. It's good that you can look back and take the learning experiences from all of the struggle you have gone through. It shows how strong you are and will let you appreciate where you are now, that much more.

    You are right about the na/aa meetings. I just don't feel they are for me. I have attended a few a while back. I got a couple of DUI's about 8 years ago when i was taking handfuls of soma's before i got on methadone. which is one of the main reasons i got on methadone. I knew i needed to stop what i was doing or i would end up in jail. So i was court ordered to attend them and i went for about a week. It was interesting and i can see how it would be a great tool for some people, but not me. I went to my probation officer and explained that to her and the fact that i had multiple clean drug screens to back up the fact that i wasn't abusing pills anymore. I was on methadone at the time though but only methadone. (side note that this was actually 4 years after i got the DUI's and my mindset had changed a LOT by then after being on methadone for a couple years. I just never went to court and wasn't doing anything wrong so I wasn't put on probation until years later).

    whew this is turning out to be a long post but this is exactly why I say that i'm thankful to you for your posts because it's very thought provoking and stimulating. I have never written a dairy type thing and am finding this to be very therapeutic, so thank you...

    But yea, in no way am I downplaying or down talking anything about anyone that is going through active addiction because I WAS there. I know EXACTLY how you feel but I feel like it's pretty important to convey that it isn't a life long sentence. It can and will get better if you are determined and work hard at it. It's not easy and it took me years to change my mindset about pills but i've been feeling this way for a couple years now, so i'm 100% positive that it is how i will feel for the rest of my life. If not, then i will deal with whatever comes my way in the future. I refuse to live my life scared of some "disease" that is supposedly uncurable. I just don't look at it that way and it's a huge part that turned me off about aa/na meetings. I'm not powerless... f@ck that... I am in control of my body and mind, not some "disease" of addiction. I'm not ragging on aa/na meetings though... They are essential to some peoples recovery, just not me.

    I might as well add an update from yesterday since this post is a mile long already.. lol

    Day 23- 2am.. Despite the rough start to the day, the "reset" on the day worked amazingly. I woke up at 2pm from my nap and felt great. My stomach stopped hurting(with the help of imodium) and my sister and the kids came over to wrap christmas presents since she kept them all over here so the kids didn't see them. I also went to the store and bought all the stuff we needed for tomorrow. I even went to my moms to visit her. She only lives 2 doors down but like i said before, I NEVER left my room other than to work(the past 6 months my saying was "i don't go outside unless i'm getting paid for it, lol)... If they wanted to see me, they came to my house. She has been living 2 doors down for about 4 months and i've maybe been over 2 times. They are always over here though but that's not the point. I actually went and sat with them, telling them about the craziness that happened this morning. All in all... i had a great day again.... sober... who woulda thought that could be possible? Looking forward to tomorrow and spending time with my family.

  30. #30
    gottidog is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    45

    Default

    Day 24 - 10 am... Not really much to say besides I had an amazing day yesterday with my family. We cooked chicken, rice dressing, potato salad, and green beens. It was so good and my team won and clinched a playoff spot. Methadone had gotten me so disinterested in life that i hadn't even followed or watched football over the past 3-4 years, something i used to enjoy a lot. Good thing is, I am getting back to normal and I had a lot of fun yesterday watching football and eating with my nephews/nieces. My great niece is so cute(almost 2 yrs old), she ate fish and broccoli with me at lunch time. My 2 nephews, the oldests nephew's gf, and my great niece stayed the night to play the PS4 on my big screen and the company is welcomed. My stomach did start to bother me in the early part of the day and i had to go get me some more imodium(been through 2 bottles in 24 days, starting on my 3rd). I don't let it bother me too much though because i know it will pass and it's just a minor annoyance. Sleep is still good with the help of melatonin(10mg about an hour before i'm ready to go to bed). I went to sleep at 12am last night and slept until 8:30, waking up with the same routine that has had me feeling good over the past 8 days. I will stop taking the melatonin at the 30 day mark, i think. I don't really have a whole lot to do until my certification in March and sleep itself isn't the problem for me, it's falling asleep. So if it takes me until 3am to fall asleep then I can just sleep in.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. 8mg Suboxone Cold Turkey Jump Day 11
    By YungBruh in forum Prescription Drug Addiction
    Replies: 50
    Last Post: 03-26-2019, 06:24 PM
  2. 8mg Jump, Day 12...
    By xxHooTxx in forum Suboxone Treatment
    Replies: 28
    Last Post: 01-05-2017, 02:11 PM
  3. Suboxone To Jump or Not to Jump?
    By Skelo in forum Prescription Drug Addiction
    Replies: 29
    Last Post: 09-16-2014, 01:00 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22