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Need help dont trust doctors anymore with suboxone
  1. #1
    Lisa92879 is offline New Member
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    Sep 2015
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    Default Need help dont trust doctors anymore with suboxone

    I am new to this I'm not even sure if this will post in the correct place. Ive been reading a lot of others' trials and journeys and when I went to the suboxone withdrawal testimonies It scared me so much. Like everyone on this site, we all have a story, of why & how we got started. I am a 48yr old woman, RN, so I should know better, and never thought I would be in this predicament. I had some surgeries in the past 2005-2006 along with back problems the usual disc herniation spinal stenosis blah blah blah, doesn't really matter what mattered was that as time went on I noticed that I was chemically dependent which turned into, which I didn't want to admit, that I was addicted.
    An addict no not me, I didn't fit under that tittle.... but when I noticed that I was taking vic and Percocet more to take away the chemical withdrawal feelings and also the emotional pain is when I knew I had a problem. I noticed that my tolerance was greater and had to take more to get an affect. At my worst I was up to 6-9 pills a day. I called my MD and he recommended a doctor who specialized in this and I had to drive to another state ( I guess it was new treatment and there was not a lot of dr's ) or maybe it was just that me and my doctor was new to this. Anyway I went to this MD and I was put on 8mg a day this was in 2007 and looking back this doctor knew what he was doing, he did not keep me on it long I think within a few months I was off. The first week even with the suboxone I had withdrawal symptoms mostly nausea and shaky but I thought at the time god this sucks I can't imagine what it would feel like doing this cold turkey if I felt this way with suboxone.Ok that was in 2007, than in 2009 I had surgery & relapsed and went back on narcotics (Vicodin) and it was much quicker to get hooked again because I wanted the emotional pain to be kept at bay. I was so disappointed with myself. I can't believe I went through the embarrassment of admitting to my MD that I got addicted and here I went did it all over again. The only difference the second time was I did not say on narcotics for long but I was too embarrassed to tell my MD that I was addicted again. So I did my own research and came up with a bunch of doctors who did the suboxone.
    This time (2009)I went to a psychiatrist who prescribed me suboxone, started at 4mg/day. I would see her once a month at 180.00 and my health insurance covered the suboxone I only had to pay 30.00 for the months prescription. With this psych dr she had me on for years, I went from 4mg/day to 2mg/day this took at least 2 years. When her price went up and she also in the same office started doing skin treatments ( Botox, jueverderm, laser treatments etch. I went to another doctor, this one a DO, and he started me off on the 2mg/day did that for a year or so, I kept saying I didn't want to be on anything anymore. I just wanted to be done, I tapered down to half a mg a day ( I have the films and they are 2mg that I would cut in half-which would than be 1mg) since I wanted off I then tried cutting the film strip into 3 pieces but if you ever tried this its not easy to get the same size there would always be one piece that was slightly bigger than the other. I kept telling my doctor that even at this small dose that I notice a change in my body if I don't take it within the first coupe of hours of waking up, I start to feel sluggish, non motivated achy fatigued. I also to him I have been depressed. He said that I am on such a small dose even at the half mg a day he said is a baby dose and that its more psychological than actual physical. He started me on Prozac 20mg for my depression/decreased energy and I was already on wellbutrin 150mg before I started seeing him. Now after reading all these posts from others I am realizing that my depression and no energy, motivation, introverted, was not due to actual clinical or even situational depression, but in fact maybe from taking suboxone all these years. Because I do notice that when I take the bigger piece (of my attempts to cut a 2mg film into 3 pieces) I have more energy.
    Each month I keep telling myself this is the month that I taper off completely and each month (for the last 4 months) but I haven't been able to I just feel so down and I hate having no energy no motivation to do anything. I was a runner and would run 30+ miles a week-probably why I have disc problems- but for me I want to be active. I want my life back.
    I have tried to keep my dose at the half mg a day, some days I will take the 1mg just so that I can feel better, but than get disgusted with myself.

    It wasn't until I started reading other people's post that it wasn't in my head and that I am having true wd symptoms by decreasing the dose. He had me believing that there are other underlying issues, depression/anxiety and says I wish I can just get you off this last little bit suboxone, and then besides the Prozac he suggest other meds but I don't want to keep relying on one med to get me off another med that's how I got into this mess in the first place.

    I guess for people who don't want to read all of the above ( which I wouldn't blame you) I could have quickly said....
    1. Ive been on suboxone 2mg down to .5mg for several years and my dr had me thinking that if I just keep tapering off slowly I will be fine and that my feelings of depression/anxiety no energy is not from the smaller doses of sub. Now after reading all of the posts I know that it is not true. So in one way it makes me feel better to know that once I am off of suboxone for good my other symptoms will eventually go away. I will say though when reading other peoples post it scared the day lights out of me, because I had no idea that there would be withdrawal symptoms that are as bad if not worse than w/d from narcotics, even at the small dose of suboxone. I hate this I truly hate being dependent on this, my life is centered around this, for example oh I am going away to NC to visit my daughter and s**t I won't have enough till I get back so I either schedule my vacations/visits getting my refill. I WANT TO BE ME AGAIN without anything!!!!
    2. So now that I am educated on having to go through w/d at least I know its not just me going crazy and that once its out of my system I will be back to normal. I just didn't realize how long the w/d symptoms are and quite possible very intense but hey I will just have to suck it up. Now Ive been seeing this Thomas recipe or something like that but when I click on it, it brings me to a pizza ad. can someone give directions on how to get the recipe or what it is. I have been taking notes from others on what helped and I figured I will try all of it. The vita B12, B6 amino acids, boost Gatorade G2 for less calories etch. I also kept seeing an ad for Withdrawal Ease and read the customer testimonials but after listening to doctors I'm not going to trust testimonies from the site that's selling the product so I was wondering if anyone ever tried this and did it help.
    3. Lastly if anyone is thinking about taking suboxone I would never tell anyone what they should or shouldn't do but in my opinion it does help but only use it for SHORT TERM. DO NOT GO TO A DR THAT WILL NOT HAVE YOU OFF IN A FEW MONTHS.
    Thank you for any help or suggestions. I'm sorry my post was on the boring side. I left out the human parts--like I said everyone has a story, traumatic events that led us to where we are today so I just kept to the details of the medication. I would share my story, but since I am new to this and not even sure if I am doing this correctly I didn't want to pour my heart out and open up wounds if my letter is not even going to post. So I will see what happens and what if any responses I get back. To anyone who had taken the time to read this THANK YOU. <3 with love and hope to your success Lisa

  2. #2
    kaiberri is offline New Member
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Location
    WA State
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    Default

    Lisa92879,

    Welcome to the forum. I can't say that I have any great solutions, but I will definitely reassure you that you are not alone. Having been on 16mg of Suboxone for over 7 years, I feel like my body is just giving up on me. I can't agree more with your comment that Suboxone should only be used to detox for a short period of time. Have you heard of Dr. Scanalan? He is a psychiatrist/detox provider in Florida who actively addresses his concerns about maintenance therapy. What he says makes so much sense. Basically, Suboxone is only partially filling our opiate receptors with the goal that the other half will heal. Well, Suboxone is still an opiate and the other half of our receptors are not healing. It is not natural to rely on a partial agonist when our opiate receptors are suppose to be full to begin with. (just not with narcotic drugs This effects of this drug were only researched on patients taking it for fourteen days! Most doctors are getting paid really good to keep dishing out the Subs. All it takes is an eight hour class, right? Meanwhile, we- the patients are getting sicker and sicker, want to get off of Suboxone, but are scared that our doctors don't know enough to do it safely. I know all our hormones and neurotransmitters are out of whack. Our bodies can't find homeostasis, I have never tried Withdrawal Ease. But, I think anything that can help regulate our whacked out body is worth a shot. I would really urge you to read up on Dr. Steve Scanalan. He runs the Palm Beach Opiate Detox Center in Florida and has successfully gotten patients off of Suboxone many times.

  3. #3
    silverlining1 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Posts
    799

    Default

    Hey, Lisa....

    You came to the right place....because you most definitely can come off the sub and with the proper taper.....you won't be in that much discomfort.

    We have a couple people on here and they are very knowledgeable in the sub taper....I'm sure they will be along to help, but the board gets a little slow on weekends....so be patient.

    We had a group of nurses last year....all tapering.....in fact, one is Bette and she still gives her expertise generously and lovingly.....she is a wonderful woman and a huge success story.

    Just be patient and know that less is more with the sub.....and you can't rush the taper.

    Hang in there, you will get more responses....and we look forward to reading your journey.
    Ilovemtndogs7 likes this.

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