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Never have I felt this bad in my life
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
    Posts
    2

    Default Never have I felt this bad in my life

    K. 7 years ago I hurt my back real bad. So bad I couldn’t walk due to nerve damage. I eventually worked my way up to taking 180 mgs of hydromorph daily. So on Wednesday at noon I took my last dose and soon after I decided that I no longer wanted to take these soul sucking pills ever again.
    So to get to the point. I’m 54 hours in and I literally want to die. How much longer does this last. I’m actually glad for the pain. I can feel again,I want my soul back. Ever since I’ve been taking these pills I’ve hidden in a basement watching tv counting the minutes til my next dose and I’ve had it. I’ll eat the pain. I’m cool with that. It’s the hot flashes and the vomiting and diarrhea that are the real issue.
    How much more. I’ve been told 2 more days that Sunday and I’m cool with it but I’d like to hear from someone with experience with such a high dose going cold turkey.
    I’m done being a junkie.
    I’m 42 years old. About 6 years ago I got an impaired driving. I beat the charge but it made me re-evaluate my life and I haven’t had a drink since. I keep the half full bottle of wild turkey on my dresser to remind me I’m stronger than that bottle. I was pickled since I was 17 years old. I’ve done every drug known to man. Heck I snorted an 8 ball my dealer bet if I couldn’t snort it I had to pay and if I did get er down it was free. I got er down.
    I’ve snorted oxy 80s for breakfast and kicked as at work. I’m a farmer. I build houses. Nothing is better than feeling no pain in that job. So when I said no more I stopped doing all of it and I didn’t miss any of it.
    Then I hurt myself and it figures it’s tge stuff my doc gives me that I get hooked on.
    So anyone know how much longer I gotta go here
    Thanks for any help

  2. #2
    ChiefChe is online now Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    492

    Default Welcome!

    Hi Detox,

    You ou sure did find the right place to fit in here. Boy, I sure can relate to all the hiding, sneaking, counting & clock watching behaviors you mentioned. I too was under the "care" of a doctor. Those little pills are great UNTIL they're not. Congratulations of your 54 hours, you over halfway there. It usually lasts 7-10 days with the worst being anywhere Days 3-4 when they'll peak. After that you slowly get back on track. Some symptoms might linger after that but will taper off.

    You got yourself a care package with supply's to get you thru? If not Google the Thomas Recipe. All good vitamins & supplements to help your body recover. The list includes benzo' but it best to avoid those all together, unless ur already on them. Water is Life so make sure you're drinking more than plenty to flush your system out. It also makes bathroom issues easier- know what I mean? (What goes in must come out). If that issue gets too bad Imodium will be your best friend.

    After the physical comes the mental so start preparing now. If your anything like this addict right here, there's no way you can sit this bottle next to the Wild Turheh in the dresser. This is a whole different beast & 1 is to many & 1,000 will never be enough. If you really really want this then any extras around have to be tossed. Any scripts need to be ripped up and no more. I know all that sounds overwhelming right now but trust me you have to place these safe guards for your success.

    Sounds like your in the thick of it right now so keep powering thru. Keep yourself busy mentally & physically. Throw out the clock & just go with it. Fighting it will only make it worse. You might feel like your at deaths door BUT don't worry nobody's home so you won't die. Now is the PERCECT TIME to reach thru that door & snatch your SOUL back.

    Light & Luv,

    ❤️
    Che

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
    Posts
    2

    Default

    The Thomas recipe. Got it. I’ll check it out I think something broke last night. The shakes are gone and the hot flashes are gone. But I’m reminded of exactly why I was given them in the first place. Which is fine. At this point I’d rather ether feel pain than nothing at all.
    78 hours and counting.
    I think I’m thru the worst of it other than the horrible pain in my joints and the loose stool I’ve had for the past 2 day.
    Thanks for your insight
    I’m. Not like most people. Once I decide something I do it. That bottle will sit for the rest of my life. Is had to,otherwise I’m going to fail. I have to show myself I’m stronger that a bottle of meds.
    I gotta prove I’m stronger than these soul sucking pills. I want my life back more than I want to sit away and waste in a dark hole.
    I’ll be that one percent that doesn’t release. Why. Because I have seen what they do and will never allow my children to see me as a junkie ever again. They deserve better. And I deserve better

  4. #4
    ChiefChe is online now Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    492

    Default

    Detox-

    Amen to all of that!! The aches & pains will eventually even out and you'll find OTC meds will work wonders.

    You're doing great you're Will Power is bar none- Keep building on that. The goal now is to start making a life where using is not an option.

    You picked the perfect time of year to start this journey as Spring is right around the corner. What a Tine to come back to Life!!! Get out there and enjoy your Freedom, in nature, with your kids.

    Keep us posted!

    Light & Luv,

    Che

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