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In Pain Management For A Decade, 6 Weeks Into Voluntary Taper - Need Support
  1. #1
    RightTurn33 is offline Member
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    Default In Pain Management For A Decade, 6 Weeks Into Voluntary Taper - Need Support

    Where I Began Taper: Daily - 60 mgs MsContin + 40 mgs Oxycodone [plus big dose of gabapentin and zanaflex (muscle relaxant)].

    Where I am Now: Daily - 2.75 tabs of 10/325 Oxycodone divided into 4 doses (every 6 hours).

    The first 3.5 weeks of taper were fine with no withdrawal symptoms, the last 2+ weeks have been very bad - Insomnia, RLS, Cold Sweats, Extremely High Anxiety, Irritability off the charts..... Plus, emotionally, I feel lost.

    I have klonopin - and have been taking sparingly.

    I'm attempting to reduce 1/4 tablet every 4 days. I'm trying to get thru this by managing taper so I don't get smashed with withdrawals.

    I figure by end of January I should be done. I believe trying to go CT will end up in failure as the withdrawal symptoms will forse me back on meds.

    I can't stand the thought of waking up 5, 10, 20 years down the line and still being hooked on meds for pain control.

    Thank You.
    DravenDomnq and 10years39days like this.

  2. #2
    DravenDomnq is offline Advanced Member
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    Hey RightTurn, welcome to the forums, and good on you for working so hard to take your life back! I'm on my phone so can't leave a link, but you might want to search for the "Thomas Recipe" thread on here, some great info that really helped me with my tapers and jump.

    You've found a great place for support, so keep posting to let us know how things are going

  3. #3
    Thomas543 is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by RightTurn33 View Post
    Where I Began Taper: Daily - 60 mgs MsContin + 40 mgs Oxycodone [plus big dose of gabapentin and zanaflex (muscle relaxant)].

    Where I am Now: Daily - 2.75 tabs of 10/325 Oxycodone divided into 4 doses (every 6 hours).

    The first 3.5 weeks of taper were fine with no withdrawal symptoms, the last 2+ weeks have been very bad - Insomnia, RLS, Cold Sweats, Extremely High Anxiety, Irritability off the charts..... Plus, emotionally, I feel lost.

    I have klonopin - and have been taking sparingly.

    I'm attempting to reduce 1/4 tablet every 4 days. I'm trying to get thru this by managing taper so I don't get smashed with withdrawals.

    I figure by end of January I should be done. I believe trying to go CT will end up in failure as the withdrawal symptoms will forse me back on meds.

    I can't stand the thought of waking up 5, 10, 20 years down the line and still being hooked on meds for pain control.

    Thank You.
    You are doing great! I know the anxiety is bad...I took the exact route you did...I was up to 8-10+ of hydrocodone 10/325...after getting honest with all of my family members, immediately dropped to only 3 per day in halves only. I had 9 days off to do it. The first four days were BAD with what you described...RLS, terrible anxiety, spotty sleep...BUT, because it was a taper, I still did not have acute WD symptoms. No stomach issues, nothing horrifying like I’ve heard with CT...and what I experienced when I ran out almost two years ago. To go from 8-10 per day to 3 in halves only was a miracle...and I pushed through the 4-5 days of what you described...then as suddenly as it came....it was GONE.

    What did last longer was that last feeling you talked about. I felt like I was living someone else’s life. I felt totally abnormal, like I was someone else. Everything felt wrong. Again, this only lasted about 5 days...and I suddenly felt normal only only 3 per day in halves only.

    I then stepped it down slowly over about 4 weeks until I was down to 2 per day halves only...then 1.5....then 1...and I jumped about 4 days ago.

    I don’t care HOW hard this feels or bad...I will not go back. Never. I’m like you...I saw how gradually this snuck up on me and suddenly I wasn’t even okay with 4 per day as prescribed, went to 5...then 6-8...then I was over 10 per day, borrowing from my I parents, getting extra from friends...I did this for 2-3 years...I knew I had a problem but did not know how to get out of it. I am an elementary school teacher, felt boxed in....and when I was first prescribed for my chronic back injury pain...I really and honestly did not know a thing about opioids.

    You are ALMOST THERE. Persevere. Press onward. You CAN do this. A little bit of pain NOW will save our lives NOW. And you’ll be FREE and no longer a part of this opioid epidemic. I hated that part! I got into it by accident, like most of us...and by a doctor who never questioned if I should be taking these meds this long.

    Please press onward. You *can* do this. So many of us here have...and so can you. Stay here...read, read, read...get inspired by other stories like I did. Read Forceouts story...read Beef’s story...maybe they’ll provide links, I don’t know how to do that yet.

    You are doing GREAT. Please don’t give up. It’s so easy to just take more...but, like you say...play that tape through to 10 years from now when it will be MANY TIMES harder. It’s just TEMPORARY. You’ll get through it!!!!!

    Bright Blessings
    Thomas

  4. #4
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Just wanted to poke my head in and say welcome as well!!! You've found an amazing place with a bunch of amazing people who want nothing more than to help and inspire you on your road to recovery. Sounds like you already got some solid advice from Draven and Thomas. I will say that the mental journey is quite formidable. Keeping a positive mindset is key. Get out there and stay as active as possible. You're doing amazing!!! Keep on going. It only gets better from here.

    Keep doing the next right thing!!
    Again welcome!!! And congratulations
    Beef

  5. #5
    Anonymous Guest

    Default

    Hi RightTurn. Besides the physical withdrawals, you hit on something I really went through. Feeling emotionally lost. It does get better. I had days though, where I found I had driven around 100 miles, mostly trying to think of what I should be doing. I’m pretty sure I didn’t have that answer when I was on drugs, but without the drugs I really felt it.

    The biggest thing that got me through withdrawals was accepting where I was in the process, over and over, because I kept getting hit by sickness or anxiety or insomnia I thought I had already accepted. I wasn’t even sure I could get dressed without drugs.

    Have faith! It won’t last forever, though it may feel like it at times. Use this forum to help sort out your thoughts and feelings. Welcome!

  6. #6
    RightTurn33 is offline Member
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    Thanks, appreciate the consideration. Yes, I've seen the information for the Thomas method - I've been trying to get my nutrients through whole foods. I have been drinking electrolyte replacement drinks - definitely helps RLS.
    DravenDomnq likes this.

  7. #7
    RightTurn33 is offline Member
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    thanks Thomas. Sounds as if your detox journey has been successful - congrats. I'm hoping once I get thru this current round of withdrawal symptoms, that I'll be able to taper without too much more discomfort, but I know that's probably not too realistic. Because tapering is just drawing out withdrawals in the hopes one does not crash before jump off point.
    DravenDomnq likes this.

  8. #8
    RightTurn33 is offline Member
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    MajorMojo - It sure does take added focus during the day to get anything accomplished. I do know how to pace around my abode though. And I manage to both freeze and sweat at the same time. One does develop undesirable talents during detox (unfortunately) Take care and thanks for kind words.

  9. #9
    RightTurn33 is offline Member
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    Beef - I like that, "keep doing the next right thing". Thanks for the encouragement!

  10. #10
    Manager75 is offline New Member
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    Congrats. Taper is the absolute BEST way to REDUCE withdrawal symptoms. With that being said, if you are miserable, time to kick. I tapered for a several weeks after a years long heavy addiction. The tapering ended when the real symptoms began. Then it lasted 3-5 days of serious WDs. I sense your frustration. The feeling of no longer being able to "get anything" out of any substance is a deterrent for anybody to stop doing it. There is no need to prolong serious symptoms with a hope for a less severe outcome. The time to act is soon, much sooner than months out. Aim for 5-7 days out and do it! Tussin Dx with Antihystimine, Kratom, Ibuprofen, hot showers and time off were key. For me not sleeping was the worst problem. I stayed up for several nights keeping myself occupied with games etc. Then the anxiety slowly dissolved. 3-5 days you can do it!
    RightTurn33 likes this.

  11. #11
    10years39days is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Manager75 View Post
    Congrats. Taper is the absolute BEST way to REDUCE withdrawal symptoms. With that being said, if you are miserable, time to kick. I tapered for a several weeks after a years long heavy addiction. The tapering ended when the real symptoms began. Then it lasted 3-5 days of serious WDs. I sense your frustration. The feeling of no longer being able to "get anything" out of any substance is a deterrent for anybody to stop doing it. There is no need to prolong serious symptoms with a hope for a less severe outcome. The time to act is soon, much sooner than months out. Aim for 5-7 days out and do it! Tussin Dx with Antihystimine, Kratom, Ibuprofen, hot showers and time off were key. For me not sleeping was the worst problem. I stayed up for several nights keeping myself occupied with games etc. Then the anxiety slowly dissolved. 3-5 days you can do it!
    Hi Manager - I’m currently on day 7 of a Suboxone jump. I’m curious about your recommendation for antihistamines? For the sneezes, or something else? I sneeze like 20 times a Day right now. It has to be related, as I don’t feel sick in the traditional sense.

  12. #12
    RightTurn33 is offline Member
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    Default Day 2

    Day 2 is a little misleading - what it really is, is this - yesterday was my 3rd day into my second round of withdrawal symptoms on a 2 to 3 month taper. Yesterday was horrible ---> anxiety, RLS, and several bouts of cold sweats. The cold sweats were devastating as it was minus 20F. here yesterday, and we are in the midst of severe winter weather. My last dose is at midnight and I took half a klonopin in hopes of getting some sleep last night. I ended up having RLS at about 1 am and finally slept at about 2 am for a solid 3 hours. I was up at 6 am and am feeling somewhat better this morning. Unsure as to how the day is going to go, but I'm hopeful w/d symptoms will minimize today. My plan is to stabilize on this lower dosage for a couple days and then taper down another 1/4 pill of 10/325 oxycodone. I am hoping/praying that my body and mind won't notice the decrease. And then continue with tapering after 2 or 3 days at lower dosage(s). I haven't been able to exercise - as to top things off, I was so run down from the first 6 weeks of tapering, I caught a minor flu bug and have been sick on top of withdrawal symptoms. Once I can begin exercising again - well, I'm hoping that will be a big help on my way to freedom. Thanks for everyone's support - the best to you all!
    DravenDomnq likes this.

  13. #13
    10years39days is offline Member
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    I can't speak to the withdrawal symptoms from Oxycodone, but I do know that tapering down to a low (sub-clinical) dose with Suboxone made me feel perpetually sick...like I was fighting off an annoying flu bug. In the beginning, it was barely noticeable but then as my taper progressed my symptoms got worse. Once I let go of the taper and took my last dose, it was a relatively quick uphill battle (3 days) and since then it's all been downhill. And now, I'm feeling at least times better than I was feeling 5 or 6 days ago.

    But to be fair, I'm saying this in hindsight...if you would've asked me in person how I was doing 5 days ago I probably would've just crumbled up in a ball and started crying. Honestly, If I could do this all over again, I would have jumped many weeks ago. I was on such a low dose, I don't think it was the right choice to continue putting myself through the stress of tapering.

    I hope this helps, and it may not be relevant because we are talking about two completely different drugs...but ultimately I hope you find the strength to let go of the taper. For me, it was reading Randy, Beef, and others' stories that ultimately got me to jump.

    You've got this!
    - 10years
    RightTurn33 likes this.

  14. #14
    newguy28 is offline New Member
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    Default Beyond Hope

    I have a good idea where you're coming from. While I didn't do as many prescription pills that is how it all started. I come looking for help but I can relate to what you're saying here. After I got to the point of buying all the pills either all I could find or all I could afford to buy. I have degenerative disc. Disease, I'm just finding this out, and you'd never guess who found this. The jail I've been to countless doctors for years, they all told me that they couldn't find anything wrong. On the other hand I've been on disability since I was 22 I started buying pills when I was around 30-33 ,I'm 47 now. It had come to the point that the pills not only stopped working but the cost got out of control real fast. I started by paying 3.00 for a-5mg pill. After a few years everyone was taking them just to get high. And they were willing to fork out 5.00 a pill. I tried keeping up but it became impossible, my tolerance was high and the price of the pills higher. One day I got a pill of smack. It seemed like a solution at the time but I didn't know much about dope, just it was super cheap compared to pills and that my pain was completely gone. I hadn't felt pain free since being a teenager. I still feel resentful the doctors didn't help me and instead of helping me basically said the heck with him let him suffer. I am only recently learning about what is wrong with me, so I still don't know much about what can be done to help me. It's ridiculous hard to get off the stuff and the pain makes you want to start all over again. I've been sick so many times, but what's the hardest thing to me is my brain. I feel like its divided into halfs. Half of it knows drugs are a serious problem and this part wants to stop, immediately. But the other half wants to use drugs very badly. I can't get it out of that half of my brain. And that's what I struggle with every day. I've managed to stop several times but it never lasts. I basically have no support and about the same amount of friends. Real friends that is, not people I used drugs with. Where I live is basically drug addicts and people who don't use, however these people don't fit in with me in any way because I'm disabled and I've been this way so long my social security is basically nothing. So I don't fit in anyplace, I can't afford to do anything, which in turn makes me want to do things the wrong way because Im barely alive here. We all know using mask our feelings and I always feel the need to do this. It's very depressing when you know you have no money and you can no longer find any work at all. I did home improvements but now the foreigners are lined up outside home depot so I have no chance making any extra money. I will never understand giving up our country so people that aren't from here can take our jobs. I spent years of my life learning everything about home improvements ,electric ,plumbing ,ceramic tile, carpentry you name it I learned it..... And now it was all for nothing. I don't know how many illegals are here now, what I do know Is I used to be able to get all the side work I wanted and then some. Now my skills aren't worth a penny, it just ain't right. I dont know what to do or how to live anymore. I'm actually homeless now due to all the people who took my job. All I hear is how they work hard and for less. And they do jobs we don't want to, I can say for sure that Is not true. I'd love to have a gas station or 711 I'll take that job all day long! I'm a foreigner in my country. I wish I could cross the border and make a living, but we all know I can't. I don't hate anyone but I've been locked up for doing wrong someone needs to be held accountable for all this. I should be able to get part time work and not be homeless. Right now im. Staying any place that I can but I can definitely say its impossible for me to get away from people who use drugs. If not for them I'd freeze to death here and that's the truth! I don't know what anyone can possibly say that will help me but I'm all ears

  15. #15
    RightTurn33 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by newguy28 View Post
    I have a good idea where you're coming from. While I didn't do as many prescription pills that is how it all started. I come looking for help but I can relate to what you're saying here. After I got to the point of buying all the pills either all I could find or all I could afford to buy. I have degenerative disc. Disease, I'm just finding this out, and you'd never guess who found this. The jail I've been to countless doctors for years, they all told me that they couldn't find anything wrong. On the other hand I've been on disability since I was 22 I started buying pills when I was around 30-33 ,I'm 47 now. It had come to the point that the pills not only stopped working but the cost got out of control real fast. I started by paying 3.00 for a-5mg pill. After a few years everyone was taking them just to get high. And they were willing to fork out 5.00 a pill. I tried keeping up but it became impossible, my tolerance was high and the price of the pills higher. One day I got a pill of smack. It seemed like a solution at the time but I didn't know much about dope, just it was super cheap compared to pills and that my pain was completely gone. I hadn't felt pain free since being a teenager. I still feel resentful the doctors didn't help me and instead of helping me basically said the heck with him let him suffer. I am only recently learning about what is wrong with me, so I still don't know much about what can be done to help me. It's ridiculous hard to get off the stuff and the pain makes you want to start all over again. I've been sick so many times, but what's the hardest thing to me is my brain. I feel like its divided into halfs. Half of it knows drugs are a serious problem and this part wants to stop, immediately. But the other half wants to use drugs very badly. I can't get it out of that half of my brain. And that's what I struggle with every day. I've managed to stop several times but it never lasts. I basically have no support and about the same amount of friends. Real friends that is, not people I used drugs with. Where I live is basically drug addicts and people who don't use, however these people don't fit in with me in any way because I'm disabled and I've been this way so long my social security is basically nothing. So I don't fit in anyplace, I can't afford to do anything, which in turn makes me want to do things the wrong way because Im barely alive here. We all know using mask our feelings and I always feel the need to do this. It's very depressing when you know you have no money and you can no longer find any work at all. I did home improvements but now the foreigners are lined up outside home depot so I have no chance making any extra money. I will never understand giving up our country so people that aren't from here can take our jobs. I spent years of my life learning everything about home improvements ,electric ,plumbing ,ceramic tile, carpentry you name it I learned it..... And now it was all for nothing. I don't know how many illegals are here now, what I do know Is I used to be able to get all the side work I wanted and then some. Now my skills aren't worth a penny, it just ain't right. I dont know what to do or how to live anymore. I'm actually homeless now due to all the people who took my job. All I hear is how they work hard and for less. And they do jobs we don't want to, I can say for sure that Is not true. I'd love to have a gas station or 711 I'll take that job all day long! I'm a foreigner in my country. I wish I could cross the border and make a living, but we all know I can't. I don't hate anyone but I've been locked up for doing wrong someone needs to be held accountable for all this. I should be able to get part time work and not be homeless. Right now im. Staying any place that I can but I can definitely say its impossible for me to get away from people who use drugs. If not for them I'd freeze to death here and that's the truth! I don't know what anyone can possibly say that will help me but I'm all ears

    Is there any social agency where you can go to get help. Sorry you've had such a rough go of it. Sounds to me like your head is in the right place wanting to get clean. I'm fortunate that I am physically dependent, but not addicted - I have no want or desire to do drugs. They helped take away surgery related neuropathic damage - now I am ready to learn to deal with the pain through natural methods. Will say a prayer for you.

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