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Quit cold turkey and struggled. Day 11 now!
  1. #1
    MiserableMe is offline New Member
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    Default Quit cold turkey and struggled. Day 11 now!

    Trying this again. I tried posting my story and situation here 3 days ago when I was at my worst but for some reason it didn't make the forum. Anyway, here we go. This is my first post but I've been reading a lot of other threads trying to get through this nightmare. I've been using opiates for over 5 years. No one knows except my gf at the time. I held a career of 17 yrs and have 2 teenage daughters. First 3 years were perc 30s. 5-6 a day. Tried to quit once after a short taper and made it about 7 days before gong back. A couple months later I discovered Suboxone. I thought it was my way out but lil did I know I was replacing one substance for another. Two years of subs I decided enough was enough. I don't want to be dependent anymore. I quit cold turkey after taking 2 8mg strips per day for almost a year. June 26th was my last strip. It's been hard! Very hard! I should have tapered. I made it 3 days before grabbing a few pills. Then 5 days later I used the 4th of July as an excuse to "feel better". But no more excuses. I'm DONE!! Been 11 days now! I've read here that most severe symptoms last 5-6 days. I was at my worst day 9 & 10. Guessing do to not tapering or cheating with pills? Not sure. But my symptoms have all lingered. I've struggled to eat or drink as it upsets my stomach and goes right through me. I've barely left my house. I can only fake having the "flu" for so long. I've been taking Imodium, advil, gaba, multivitamins and forcing down water, Gatorade, Ensure and as much fruits and veggies as I can handle even though 20 mins later I'm in the bathroom. I've read that exercise helps but I struggle to get off the couch. The depression hit me hard the last couple days. I'm a grown man crying over the stupidest things. I've had to grit my teeth, suck it up and take one day at a time. I keep telling myself, 30 days of misery for freedom the rest of my life!

    So here's the good news. After over 2 weeks of misery and feeling like there was no end in sight for some reason I woke up today feeling hopeful. Even after only 4 hours of sleep. My stomach has settled down and I had my first real meal since this all started. I don't know what it is but something's different. Not sure if I'm just having a good day and the misery will be back but it feels good.

    Thanks in advance to anyone who reads or replies! And good luck to anyone battling this demon!

  2. #2
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    Hang in there. Dont give up. Everyday will be up and down but you are steadily going to see improvement. Set your mind to freedom. You can do this. Because I have. And I am not original. Many people have gotten off and stayed off. You are going to be one of us too! Tapering is the most humane way. But still can be difficult. Just keep moving forward. Do not go backwards. You should be getting through the worst of it now.

  3. #3
    ChiefChe is offline Senior Member
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    Hi Miserable,

    Welcome. Just wanted to send you some encouragement. That feeling you felt this morning- hang on to those feelings. They will come & go over the next few weeks. But the just like this morning they will come & they will start to stay longer & longer. So each time that good mood hits you stop & take it all in. Every color every sound & every feeling.

    Stay the course!

    Much Luv & Respect,

    ~CC

  4. #4
    Ricky71 is offline Advanced Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by MiserableMe View Post
    Trying this again. I tried posting my story and situation here 3 days ago when I was at my worst but for some reason it didn't make the forum. Anyway, here we go. This is my first post but I've been reading a lot of other threads trying to get through this nightmare. I've been using opiates for over 5 years. No one knows except my gf at the time. I held a career of 17 yrs and have 2 teenage daughters. First 3 years were perc 30s. 5-6 a day. Tried to quit once after a short taper and made it about 7 days before gong back. A couple months later I discovered Suboxone. I thought it was my way out but lil did I know I was replacing one substance for another. Two years of subs I decided enough was enough. I don't want to be dependent anymore. I quit cold turkey after taking 2 8mg strips per day for almost a year. June 26th was my last strip. It's been hard! Very hard! I should have tapered. I made it 3 days before grabbing a few pills. Then 5 days later I used the 4th of July as an excuse to "feel better". But no more excuses. I'm DONE!! Been 11 days now! I've read here that most severe symptoms last 5-6 days. I was at my worst day 9 & 10. Guessing do to not tapering or cheating with pills? Not sure. But my symptoms have all lingered. I've struggled to eat or drink as it upsets my stomach and goes right through me. I've barely left my house. I can only fake having the "flu" for so long. I've been taking Imodium, advil, gaba, multivitamins and forcing down water, Gatorade, Ensure and as much fruits and veggies as I can handle even though 20 mins later I'm in the bathroom. I've read that exercise helps but I struggle to get off the couch. The depression hit me hard the last couple days. I'm a grown man crying over the stupidest things. I've had to grit my teeth, suck it up and take one day at a time. I keep telling myself, 30 days of misery for freedom the rest of my life!

    So here's the good news. After over 2 weeks of misery and feeling like there was no end in sight for some reason I woke up today feeling hopeful. Even after only 4 hours of sleep. My stomach has settled down and I had my first real meal since this all started. I don't know what it is but something's different. Not sure if I'm just having a good day and the misery will be back but it feels good.

    Thanks in advance to anyone who reads or replies! And good luck to anyone battling this demon!
    The 5-6 days of the worst symptoms being over are for fast acting opiates like oxy, not subs. The recovery for subs is much worse and last alot longer! Remember, you jumped from an extremely high amount of sub, most people taper down to .25mg sub/day (1 quarter of 1mg) or less before jumping off! I urge you to stay the course now, no more opiates whatsoever! You'll still your good days and your bad days but eventually the good days will become more consistent! Remember to drink lots of water, eat a good diet high in lean protein, and increase your potassium intake! Exercise when you can? Stay the course, things will continue to get better! Keep up the good work and keep us posted? Take care... God bless us all!

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    MiserableMe is offline New Member
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    Thank you, Thank you and Thank you!! Thanks for the support! It sure felt good to see those replies because by the end of the night I was miserable again. I was frustrated and feeling overwhelmed. It was great to hear that it's common to have ups and downs. I did manage to sleep for almost 7 hours last night which is the most I've slept in over 2 weeks. I will keep taking each one of these small victories and build off of them. Definitely only looking forward and not going back. One day at a time. I go back to work on Tues. It's a very physical job so I'll be getting plenty of exercise then. Just hope I'm up for it.

  6. #6
    zebra1961 is offline Member
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    Miserable , Hello your story is close to mine.Percs hydros oxys etc for about 7 1/2 years 2 1/2 subs I jumped at 6-8 mgs not good!! Sleep is gonna be tough for a while but it will improve.Subs wds last longer than the other opiates. I don't want to scare you but it will be awhile before normal returns, you will have up and down days sometimes thinking its not getting better but it is. The up days will increase and the downs less and less. Stay the course on the vitamins food and drugs to help with the wds symtoms. It does get better I promise better days ahead just hang tough don't look back. This grown man cried over everything and I very rarely cried before so that's just part of it. Exercise really helped with the mental aspect of it and hot soaks helped with the physical part. It gets WaYYYYYYYYYY better so hang tough!!!!

  7. #7
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by MiserableMe View Post
    Thank you, Thank you and Thank you!! Thanks for the support! It sure felt good to see those replies because by the end of the night I was miserable again. I was frustrated and feeling overwhelmed. It was great to hear that it's common to have ups and downs. I did manage to sleep for almost 7 hours last night which is the most I've slept in over 2 weeks. I will keep taking each one of these small victories and build off of them. Definitely only looking forward and not going back. One day at a time. I go back to work on Tues. It's a very physical job so I'll be getting plenty of exercise then. Just hope I'm up for it.

    Welcome to the forum, MiserableMe -

    Jumping form 16mgs of sub per day is something that's not EVER recommended. To be brutally honest, not very many ever make it doing that. I can count on one hand the people I know that have accomplished that feat. Doesn't mean you can't by any means and I certainly hope you do. I hope you never have a bad day again and you have my full support for what you're attempting to do.

    You were taking 16mgs per day for nearly a year you said. Suboxone has a long half life between 24 and 72 hours. It remains in your system a long time. As a result of taking that much sub for that long you have quite a build up in your system when you jumped. So you didn't jump from 16mgs, you actually jumped from a much higher amount. Hard to figure just how much. Just stating the facts so you can have an understanding of what you're up against.

    As Ricky mentioned most people taper down slow and steady to at least .25mg per day. That allows the half life to dissipate and makes the final jump much more tolerable. For that reason many find that even after 1-2 weeks, or more has passed away from the sub they have to get right back on a much smaller dose and taper down as I mentioned. If it does come down to that for you then you shouldn't feel defeated in any way as sub is extremely powerful.

    I honestly wish you the very best. I hope you make it, I really do. Do all the things the others have suggested. Pound down LOTS of fluids including water/gatorade/protein shales. Get as mcu hexercise as you possible can. Don't sit around in the house, get up and get out as that will help the most.

    If you do find you just can deal with the symptoms let us know and I or someone else can help you with a proper taper.

    Good luck!

    Randy

  8. #8
    MiserableMe is offline New Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by zebra1961 View Post
    Miserable , Hello your story is close to mine.Percs hydros oxys etc for about 7 1/2 years 2 1/2 subs I jumped at 6-8 mgs not good!! Sleep is gonna be tough for a while but it will improve.Subs wds last longer than the other opiates. I don't want to scare you but it will be awhile before normal returns, you will have up and down days sometimes thinking its not getting better but it is. The up days will increase and the downs less and less. Stay the course on the vitamins food and drugs to help with the wds symtoms. It does get better I promise better days ahead just hang tough don't look back. This grown man cried over everything and I very rarely cried before so that's just part of it. Exercise really helped with the mental aspect of it and hot soaks helped with the physical part. It gets WaYYYYYYYYYY better so hang tough!!!!
    Hi Zebra, thanks for the support. I figured it wasn't going to be easy. My original plan was to taper and not try this cold turkey crud but the mind game got to me. I had them so I took em. I set a target date to quit and as the date came near I had more than I needed. So rather than taper I just took my usual dose. My quit date hit and I still had a few left so I made the choice to toss them. It's been rough for sure. But I got this!! One day at a time! That's the best advice I've read so far and I keep preaching it to myself. Today was rough. I laid around most of the day but we had the local Lake Fair firework show going on tonight so I made the choice to go. I had to literally drag myself out the door but once I got in the car I felt alive. Windows down and music blaring. It gave me goose bumps. In a good way. Like Chief said in a previous post I just took it all in and enjoyed the moment. I ended up walking 1.7 miles (says my app) met up with a couple friends and watched the fireworks. My back hurt and I was wiped but it felt good to get out. Now I'm laying here restless but gonna try to get some sleep.

    In a few weeks I hope to be making posts like you, Finallyoff, Chief, Ricky as well as all the other amazing ppl who come here to support all of us and tell ppl it can be done!

    P.S. It's crazy how hard it is to control your emotions while going through this. It's like I've been numb for so long that my mind and body doesn't know what it's feeling. But shhhh.... let's not tell anyone about the crying stuff! Lol.

    DAY 12.....

  9. #9
    MiserableMe is offline New Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Randy35 View Post
    Welcome to the forum, MiserableMe -

    Jumping form 16mgs of sub per day is something that's not EVER recommended. To be brutally honest, not very many ever make it doing that. I can count on one hand the people I know that have accomplished that feat. Doesn't mean you can't by any means and I certainly hope you do. I hope you never have a bad day again and you have my full support for what you're attempting to do.

    You were taking 16mgs per day for nearly a year you said. Suboxone has a long half life between 24 and 72 hours. It remains in your system a long time. As a result of taking that much sub for that long you have quite a build up in your system when you jumped. So you didn't jump from 16mgs, you actually jumped from a much higher amount. Hard to figure just how much. Just stating the facts so you can have an understanding of what you're up against.

    As Ricky mentioned most people taper down slow and steady to at least .25mg per day. That allows the half life to dissipate and makes the final jump much more tolerable. For that reason many find that even after 1-2 weeks, or more has passed away from the sub they have to get right back on a much smaller dose and taper down as I mentioned. If it does come down to that for you then you shouldn't feel defeated in any way as sub is extremely powerful.

    I honestly wish you the very best. I hope you make it, I really do. Do all the things the others have suggested. Pound down LOTS of fluids including water/gatorade/protein shales. Get as mcu hexercise as you possible can. Don't sit around in the house, get up and get out as that will help the most.

    If you do find you just can deal with the symptoms let us know and I or someone else can help you with a proper taper.

    Good luck!

    Randy
    Hi Randy, thanks for the support and your honesty. It actually makes me feel better to hear all of that so I know what I'm feeling is "normal". What you said makes sense. The first couple days were a breeze compared to day 4 thru now. Guessing that's because the subs were still in my system. And it explains why the more severe symptoms have stayed with me. As I just said to Zebra it wasn't my intention to go off like that. I knew better. It's not healthy at all. It just happened that way and I'm owning it. I hope to be another finger you count on that hand! Only time will tell.

    Ok, now I'm off to sleep......I hope. Almost 2am here. Thanks again!!

    DAY 12......
    Last edited by Anonymous; 07-17-2017 at 03:45 AM.
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  10. #10
    Tiredandanxious15 is offline Junior Member
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    Way to make it this far! I've been following your thread for a few days now and I'm impressed with you. Keep it up! I don't have experience with subs but spent years addicted to Vicodin and whatever else I could find. Your withdrawals will last a little longer than mine most likely but I personally havs been clean from them since may 5th and feel better than any day I was using. Know it will come! I had countless relapses before kicking them for what I now know will be forever. The last time I was in withdrawal rather than sitting inside I went out and spent as much time with others as I could handle. The mind game was the hardest for me and sitting there alone drove me mad. Start exercising as soon as you can. I hated it at first but now I'm biking 40+ miles a week, down 15 lbs, and in my best shape since highschool. There are many benefits to reap as you stay the course. Good luck!

    -T&A

  11. #11
    ChiefChe is offline Senior Member
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    Miserable-

    Just checking in to see if your still finding the silver lining? Also, wasted to remind you that if there is WILL there is a WAY! Stay strong friend!!

    ❤️

    ~CC

  12. #12
    MiserableMe is offline New Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tiredandanxious15 View Post
    Way to make it this far! I've been following your thread for a few days now and I'm impressed with you. Keep it up! I don't have experience with subs but spent years addicted to Vicodin and whatever else I could find. Your withdrawals will last a little longer than mine most likely but I personally havs been clean from them since may 5th and feel better than any day I was using. Know it will come! I had countless relapses before kicking them for what I now know will be forever. The last time I was in withdrawal rather than sitting inside I went out and spent as much time with others as I could handle. The mind game was the hardest for me and sitting there alone drove me mad. Start exercising as soon as you can. I hated it at first but now I'm biking 40+ miles a week, down 15 lbs, and in my best shape since highschool. There are many benefits to reap as you stay the course. Good luck!

    -T&A
    Hi T&A, Thanks for the support! And congrats on your achievment! I can't wait until I'm 2 months clean and feeling better as well. It's great to hear your success and how well you're doing now. My goal is to get back to who I was before I started using. 5 years ago I was 34 and in the best shape of my life. I was hitting the gym and exercising every day. But since my addiction I've put on 20lbs and gotten very lazy. That's gonna change!! I've set my mind to it. I feel like this whole addiction is 70% a mind game. Your will to quit needs to be much stronger than your desire to take that pill!! And no matter how miserable I've felt or frustrated I've been my will has not left me......yet! One day at a time!!

    Day 14.....

    --Mis

  13. #13
    MiserableMe is offline New Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by ChiefChe View Post
    Miserable-

    Just checking in to see if your still finding the silver lining? Also, wasted to remind you that if there is WILL there is a WAY! Stay strong friend!!

    ❤️

    ~CC
    Heya Chief, I'm doing ok. Still pluggin away. My WILL is strong! Today is my first day back to work since this all began. I haven't slept well at all and I'm a lil nervous how I'll manage but I'll get through! I'm almost glad this day has come to get me off my couch and out of my house. It's mandatory exercise. Everyone has been telling me to get off my butt so this will be good.....I hope. Thanks so much for checking in!!

    Day 14.....

    --Mis

  14. #14
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Hello MiserableMe, Congratulations..your doing amazing..I know how hard it is going coldturkey..I've been there...You are definitely Strong... this has been the most difficult Journey of my Life.. I am now almost 9 months clean...It's so worth it.... You are worth it too. Life clean. Yes the mind games, it's our bodies grieving the loss of Opiates. This too shall pass..stay strong keep active keep hydrated..we are all here to support you... Stay Strong for Today...

  15. #15
    blisstide is offline New Member
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    keep it up!!! 2 weeks already so it sounds like you're pretty much done with the worst of it. even though you're going through hell, keep going!! each day is another day closer to getting your life back and being YOU again! i've tried multiple times to taper off and quit oxys, all unsuccessful. i recently got myself into some trouble and now have to pass a few drug tests so i'm forced to quit. started taking subs but i only have so many as i am not prescribed. i'm preparing myself for the worst. it'll be tough since i work a full time job with children so i gotta keep that smile on my face. i'm considering taking a "vacation" to detox. sounds like you're doing everything right though! all power to you. very very VERY best of luck to you. you gotta want it and it sounds like you do. don't stop now! you'll get through it man. thank you for sharing your story

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    Ricky71 is offline Advanced Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by blisstide View Post
    keep it up!!! 2 weeks already so it sounds like you're pretty much done with the worst of it. even though you're going through hell, keep going!! each day is another day closer to getting your life back and being YOU again! i've tried multiple times to taper off and quit oxys, all unsuccessful. i recently got myself into some trouble and now have to pass a few drug tests so i'm forced to quit. started taking subs but i only have so many as i am not prescribed. i'm preparing myself for the worst. it'll be tough since i work a full time job with children so i gotta keep that smile on my face. i'm considering taking a "vacation" to detox. sounds like you're doing everything right though! all power to you. very very VERY best of luck to you. you gotta want it and it sounds like you do. don't stop now! you'll get through it man. thank you for sharing your story
    blisstide - I don't know your history with pain meds but you should definitely start your own thread if you want to get personalized help and support? You said you started taking subs, I don't know how much you're taking or for how long but depending on that info you could be making things much worse? Subs need to be taking correctly in a very structured manner! Start a thread, alot of great advice and support from some very knowledgeable people here! Take care... God bless us all!

  17. #17
    MiserableMe is offline New Member
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    Hi Lvg Nghtmare, Thanks for the support! And congrats on 9 months! It is absolutely a difficult journey. It hasn't been easy by no means. Especially going cold turkey. 10 days ago I felt like I'd never get through this. But every day gets a little better. I'm day 16 now. One day at a time!

    Hi blisstide, Thanks for the support! I definitely want IT. Which is the key to all of this. I want my life back and not be dependant on a pill or strip. And if you want it bad enough you can do it too! I have kids as well. 2 teenage daughters. So I know all about "faking that smile". I played off the "flu" for way too long. The guilt that comes with it is just as hard to deal with as the withdrawals. It's their summer. All they want to go is go go go. But I couldn't. Every time they said "hey dad, what are we doing today" it ate me up because I couldn't do much. But I just kept telling myself it's ok. Because once I'm thru this they will see a different me and I'll make up for it. If you can take a vacation, do it! Plan it for your quit date. But make sure you're ready. Really READY. And YES, start a thread. As you can see there are some amazing ppl here. Very knowledgeable and supportive! Take it one day at a time!

    Day 16.....

    --Mis
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  18. #18
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Sooo Proud of You. Keep up the good work..

  19. #19
    ChiefChe is offline Senior Member
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    Mis-

    Silver lining- Once I'm thru this they will see a different me!

    The train has left the station & is picking up steam.

    It's a great time to be alive. Keep building on these moments!

    Much Luv & Respect

    ~CC

  20. #20
    MiserableMe is offline New Member
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    Update: Hey all, still here and still opiate free! Day 20 now! The more severe symptoms are gone and my days are manageable. The worst part I deal with now are lack of sleep and my constant back pain. I haven't had a good night sleep since this all began. The only time I've slept more than an hour or two here n there is if I've used some sort of benzo. Which I try not to take because I know they can cause issues too. But even then I only sleep for 3 or 4 hours at a time. Pretty sure my back is to blame for most of it because I can never get comfortable. I wake up every hour or so in pain and have to roll over. Not sure if my back issues are part of this journey or if I just have a jacked up back. But it sucks! I also deal with headaches. Hard to describe them. Almost like tension headaches. I just chalk it all up to my body still trying to figure out how to operate without opiates.

    Aside from that I feel great! I have the occasional "gosh I sure wish I felt better" but no cravings. The thought of taking ANY form of opiate never crosses my mind. I've been more active with work and my kids. Even though I still have a long way to go I feel a sense of accomplishment. I new this was going to be hard and to make it this far feels great. Every day clean is more motivation for the next day. I read my first post and think about how miserable I was those first 2 weeks and realize this is a piece of cake compared to that! I never want to feel like that again! Still taking one day at a time.

    Thanks to all who have supported me and encouraged me along the way! And to anyone else battling this addiction it can be done. If I can do it YOU CAN do it! Trust me! You just have to want it!

    Day 20....

    Mis
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  21. #21
    Elcey is offline Member
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    Awesome for you! And your enthusiasm even thru pain and no sleep gives me encouragement. You're well on your way, and helping to lead my way - Thanks very much!
    Elcey

  22. #22
    MiserableMe is offline New Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elcey View Post
    Awesome for you! And your enthusiasm even thru pain and no sleep gives me encouragement. You're well on your way, and helping to lead my way - Thanks very much!
    Elcey
    Hi Elcey, Thank you! My enthusiasm comes from knowing I'm done. Knowing that even if my back hurts or I can't sleep that I feel better than I did a week ago. Knowing that it will get better and that I'll be a different person at the end of all this. The thought that my story might help others is even more motivation to keep going forward! I say "if I can do it YOU CAN do it" because I'm not superman. I'm an avg person. I've never been very strong minded. I've had bouts with depression since I was in high school. That's part of the reason I got so attached to opiates. I have an addictive personality. But, I am a fairly competitive person and once I decided I wanted to be done I challenged myself to make a change. And here I am!

    There are several other success stories in this forum that gave me hope. Reading other ppls threads and knowing I wasn't alone helped me a lot. I'm flattered to be a part of that! Thank you! You got this!! Good luck to you!!

    Day 20....

    Mis

  23. #23
    Elcey is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by MiserableMe View Post
    Hi Elcey, Thank you! My enthusiasm comes from knowing I'm done. Knowing that even if my back hurts or I can't sleep that I feel better than I did a week ago. Knowing that it will get better and that I'll be a different person at the end of all this. The thought that my story might help others is even more motivation to keep going forward! I say "if I can do it YOU CAN do it" because I'm not superman. I'm an avg person. I've never been very strong minded. I've had bouts with depression since I was in high school. That's part of the reason I got so attached to opiates. I have an addictive personality. But, I am a fairly competitive person and once I decided I wanted to be done I challenged myself to make a change. And here I am!

    There are several other success stories in this forum that gave me hope. Reading other ppls threads and knowing I wasn't alone helped me a lot. I'm flattered to be a part of that! Thank you! You got this!! Good luck to you!!

    Day 20....

    Mis
    Thanks Mis, we're getting there. I was addicted to alcohol for many (30?) years until finally stopping, but never thought it'd be possible I'd get hooked on pills. The pain was real, they relieved the pain, why would I not take them. Until the day I discovered I felt kind of good when I took them, in the head. Things seemed softer, not so difficult . . . So if 2 feels like that, imagine 3, wow even 4 - 4 was my max due to fear of liver toxicity, but it was 4 every time. And the scripts last only 1 or 2 weeks instead of the supposed 4. So I understand addictive personality. It can be anything that makes me feel good. What I need to do is try channeling those things that make me feel good into things that are also really actually good FOR me, like exercise, healthy food.

    All new and all challenging, but really, what else am I gonna do with my time now. Keep up your tremendous work - your surging ahead.
    Elcey

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    zebra1961 is offline Member
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    miserable, sounds like your on your way!!! Way to hang tough!!! Proud and happy for you!!! Sleep is tough like I said before but should slowly get better, I did not sleep more than a hour every other day for first 3 weeks, I did not know a human could do that but I did, I rolled over two thousand times a night in bed my sheets were all rolled up!! BUT it will improve so don't look back. Like you said you can quit if you want to no matter what!! I am so happy for you, you are gonna finish I can tell by the way you talk and what you are doing, keep it up only gets better!!
    Elcey likes this.

  25. #25
    MiserableMe is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2017
    Posts
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    Just wanted to check in. I haven't posted in a while but log on every couple days to read posts. Still going strong! It's been 46 days since I made the choice to quit and haven't looked back. My body is still healing but I feel great. Not gonna lie, it was rough. I struggled at times. Jumping from a high dose made it hard but for me it's what I had to do. I tried to taper but my addictive personality wouldn't let me. So i made the leap and here I am.

    It's an amazing feeling to be free. I can finally think about tomorrow, next week or further without struggling to get through the day!

    Day 46.....

  26. #26
    Tired22 is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Posts
    1

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    I'm new on here and want to say thank you for your story. I have been prescribed 5mg of perks a month 5 a day but I take more than I'm supposed to for the last five years. I have it bad all I do is think about these stupid pills. I buy them with money I should be paying bills with so I'm paying bills late I took some today but I have made up my mind that I'm done I have to get my life back. At first it's like it's OK because there legal there prescribed you know then they take over there's so much I could say on here how they have ruined my life. I just want to thank everyone on here for keeping it real you all inspire me. I guess tomorrow will be day one for me and my wife I'm not alone I know it's going to be hard I have had the upset stomach and legs feeling like there breaking when I run out but this time no more refills I'm fighting this demon. So please if you will pray for us. I will keep you updated I am really so tired of this way of life. Thank you

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