Page 2 of 6 FirstFirst 1234 ... LastLast
Results 31 to 60 of 165
Like Tree98Likes
Started sub induction and still feeling bad. Plz help
  1. #31
    dsh12345 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
    Posts
    618

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ricecrispy1111 View Post
    Wow you def gave sub a run for your money. I am very proud of you. I know what it feels like to be done and want a quicker way out. Unfortunately i have so many responsibilities that 25% or slightly less would work best for me. I totally forgot about the water dilution stuff. Thank you for reminding me. I broke the pills up into powder then rowns (as even as possible) to split up the doses.... we addicts and our habits..... seemed more accurate than just splitting the pills. My splitter is kinda crooked lol
    Its so hard to face all of your decision you made when using...... so much money gone...... debt....... but its looking up. I have such a supportive family and i know in my soul that this time i will get to the end and stay clean. My babbies and my future patients deserve a clean, happy, caring cheerful mom/nurse.
    Again thank for checking in. Im dropping from 4- to 3 tomorrow and i am splitting the dose 8am and 4pm. My alarms are set. My mind is set. My spirit is strong. Time will pass by wether i get through the storm now or later. I choose now.
    Julz
    Before I used, the number of hours of sleep I got the previous night dominated my life. I was a young adult, staying awake til 1am or 2am every night in college, while working, etc doing lots of nothing during that time late at night like an idiot... just didn't feel like going to bed and having to wake up and go to work or class the next day. Anyways, my point being in any given afternoon, I knew exactly how much sleep i got the previous night based on how tired I was feeling. A 4hr/5hr/6hr/7hr night of sleep all feel different and unique and I could always tell what I was in for based on how much sleep I got.

    You say you got a 2hr night last night.... on a 2hr night I'd feel miserable all day.. by the end of the day it starts changing your entire outlook on the world... you are like "man, why am I even in college? i dont feel like doing this anymore. why cant i feel any moment of happiness towards anythign right now today?" And then I was so tired that night I would sleep early, get 8 hours, and be a completely different person that next day.... happy again etc.

    Again, my point being don';t underestimate the fact that the majority of your symptoms right now could be 95% lack of sleep and just 5% the taper. Yea, the taper is likely contributing to your insomina, but the suboxone itself is not itself directly zapping your energy. You are not gonna feel well no matter what on just 2 hrs of sleep. We could power through that with our DOC like I would do, but suboxone doesn't work like that.


    Maybe I would suggest do whatever you can to try to get your sleep improved. Benadryl can make things worse, there's another drug OTC called doxylamine (used to be in Unisom but they switched tyo benadryl - diphenhydramine) but you can still find doxylamine over the counter. Maybe try half a pill of that or something just don't take too much or itll make you foggy all next morning just like the benadryl will do and it'll cancel out the extra sleep you got from it, or melatonin, or change up your sleep hygeine habits... anythign to try to improve your sleep. You cannot feel better period on 2 hours of sleep. Even using lots of full opiates its hard to cover up what you feel from so little sleep.

  2. #32
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    235

    Default

    So funny you post on this dsh. I didn't get much sleep last night and I am ready to clobber my boss who asked me to re-write an email 3 times bc it wasn't written in the right color or font he asked for. He's def a freak but you are right that no sleep makes everything worse. Wishing you the best Rice. I tapered down for the first time yesterday after inducting on the 14th. Keep us posted on how you are doing Rice!

  3. #33
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Starz3 View Post
    Hi Julz! I'm here rooting for you, too! I definitely relate to what you're saying about working in the health care field~it's what I do too. When I went to treatment they had a specific wing for health care providers. It was a real eye opener for me. Through the physicians, nurses, pharmacists in rehab with me, I saw the similarities in all of us who choose this kind of profession. We are care givers. What we need to learn is to also care for ourselves! Good luck to you! I'm here for you!
    Karen
    Hey karen!!! I guess when we care for others, we forget to care for ourselves....... how are you doing? Did you do rehab from work? Sub/ merhadone? I am studying for my NCLEX exam when i have the energy to, but am planning to take the summer off to end my long time toxic relationship with opiate use and better myself. Nothing better than ond healthcare addict understand another....... you know i never got high on the job while at school. I was so scared of losing what i LOVED doing but i really do need to start taking care of myself and my family......
    thanks for becoming a part of my journey and supporting me!!!! What department do you work in?? I want to be an ICU nurse. I have been choosing oncology which i love but i want to save lives part time and help others part from thus world too. Such a rewarding job.
    Hope you are doing good!!
    Julz

  4. #34
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by dsh12345 View Post
    Before I used, the number of hours of sleep I got the previous night dominated my life. I was a young adult, staying awake til 1am or 2am every night in college, while working, etc doing lots of nothing during that time late at night like an idiot... just didn't feel like going to bed and having to wake up and go to work or class the next day. Anyways, my point being in any given afternoon, I knew exactly how much sleep i got the previous night based on how tired I was feeling. A 4hr/5hr/6hr/7hr night of sleep all feel different and unique and I could always tell what I was in for based on how much sleep I got.

    You say you got a 2hr night last night.... on a 2hr night I'd feel miserable all day.. by the end of the day it starts changing your entire outlook on the world... you are like "man, why am I even in college? i dont feel like doing this anymore. why cant i feel any moment of happiness towards anythign right now today?" And then I was so tired that night I would sleep early, get 8 hours, and be a completely different person that next day.... happy again etc.

    Again, my point being don';t underestimate the fact that the majority of your symptoms right now could be 95% lack of sleep and just 5% the taper. Yea, the taper is likely contributing to your insomina, but the suboxone itself is not itself directly zapping your energy. You are not gonna feel well no matter what on just 2 hrs of sleep. We could power through that with our DOC like I would do, but suboxone doesn't work like that.


    Maybe I would suggest do whatever you can to try to get your sleep improved. Benadryl can make things worse, there's another drug OTC called doxylamine (used to be in Unisom but they switched tyo benadryl - diphenhydramine) but you can still find doxylamine over the counter. Maybe try half a pill of that or something just don't take too much or itll make you foggy all next morning just like the benadryl will do and it'll cancel out the extra sleep you got from it, or melatonin, or change up your sleep hygeine habits... anythign to try to improve your sleep. You cannot feel better period on 2 hours of sleep. Even using lots of full opiates its hard to cover up what you feel from so little sleep.
    Thanks dash!!! Today definitely feels like a "wasted" day and ya im tired and not tired at the same time but im not giving up. I have my sight on the end game and i will do anything to get it. I have proper sleepinf aide (seroquel, zopiclone, valium etc) i just want to try and normalize my sleeping schedule without the pills...... i pray i just pass out tonight and have a good night sleep. Anything above 4hr i will gladly take!!
    Thanks for being awesome!!!

  5. #35
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Justfortodaytx View Post
    So funny you post on this dsh. I didn't get much sleep last night and I am ready to clobber my boss who asked me to re-write an email 3 times bc it wasn't written in the right color or font he asked for. He's def a freak but you are right that no sleep makes everything worse. Wishing you the best Rice. I tapered down for the first time yesterday after inducting on the 14th. Keep us posted on how you are doing Rice!
    Hey justfortoday, sleep deprivation SUX. Its even harder when i have to put on a brave face so my babies dont see me cry and break down. I guess being busy with being a mom of 3 helps a bit from being bored lol. Im FAR from bored when they get home. Its a good thing. Where are you at with your taper? How are you doing?? Wishing you the best of luck
    Julz

  6. #36
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    235

    Default

    Hi Julz, you can do this! I have 2 kids as well and have to work in an insanely stressful job so I understand it's hard when we don't want those in our circle to know how bad we feel. Thanks for asking how its going.

    The week I Inducted my grandma died, I got poison sumac at her house (which I still have), got an injection in my back to help with chronic back pain, and my daughter got strep and then I had to go back to work after being off for a week.

    My boss made me re-write the same email 4 times yesterday bc he is a control freak and was mad I didn't do it exactly the way he wanted. So I went outside at lunch, I journaled, and I cried.

    You know what happened? A lady sat down and talked to me and got me tissues and I was able to go back into work (less some makeup) but it was doable.

    I think bc I have been going to meetings and my desire to get clean this time is so strong I will quit my job before I let anything threaten my sobriety. I am on day 3 of my first taper to .75 twice a day (1.5 mg total). I got a sponsor last night and I am looking forward to building a new life. I think the hardest thing after dropping has been the emotional roller coaster. But I'm still not going to use.

    Sleep is key and I think in the early days whatever can help you get it is okay as you can worry about breaking that habit later- same with food and tobacco. I just would stay away from pot, Kratom, that sort of stuff because it is mood altering. You got this! Can you go to a meeting? If you go to just one, you can get the support you need and rides to meetings. Don't worry about the kids. Find a place with a church and bring some crayons. People in the rooms usually don't care. Thinking of you.

    -E

  7. #37
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Justfortodaytx View Post
    Hi Julz, you can do this! I have 2 kids as well and have to work in an insanely stressful job so I understand it's hard when we don't want those in our circle to know how bad we feel. Thanks for asking how its going.

    The week I Inducted my grandma died, I got poison sumac at her house (which I still have), got an injection in my back to help with chronic back pain, and my daughter got strep and then I had to go back to work after being off for a week.

    My boss made me re-write the same email 4 times yesterday bc he is a control freak and was mad I didn't do it exactly the way he wanted. So I went outside at lunch, I journaled, and I cried.

    You know what happened? A lady sat down and talked to me and got me tissues and I was able to go back into work (less some makeup) but it was doable.

    I think bc I have been going to meetings and my desire to get clean this time is so strong I will quit my job before I let anything threaten my sobriety. I am on day 3 of my first taper to .75 twice a day (1.5 mg total). I got a sponsor last night and I am looking forward to building a new life. I think the hardest thing after dropping has been the emotional roller coaster. But I'm still not going to use.

    Sleep is key and I think in the early days whatever can help you get it is okay as you can worry about breaking that habit later- same with food and tobacco. I just would stay away from pot, Kratom, that sort of stuff because it is mood altering. You got this! Can you go to a meeting? If you go to just one, you can get the support you need and rides to meetings. Don't worry about the kids. Find a place with a church and bring some crayons. People in the rooms usually don't care. Thinking of you.

    -E
    Hey E!
    You sound like such a strong and resilient woman! I am so proud of your strength. Its admirable!!!! I will find a meeting and i need a sponsor too. Life has a funny way of working things out stay strong and clean E!!!!
    Today is not too bad. Im down to 3 mg total. I slept 4 hrs then took a sleeping pill which gave me another 3 hrs. Im sweating like a pig and am just cruising through this roller coaster madness. Today is a good day
    Julz
    Iluv2smile likes this.

  8. #38
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    2,537

    Default

    Julz
    Checking in to see how you are doing?
    Sounds like you got this..

    As you know it does take awhile for the brain to stopping craving quick fixes..
    But I would just imagine thoughts going out of my mind
    Just like they came in.

    I don't mean just craving thoughts
    I mean thoughts that required a quick fix for anything ..
    like you said you just gave in to the sleeplessness ..
    kind of like surrendering to our addiction ..
    It takes the power away..

    We just learn that our brains can and do lie to us..,
    Especially in the beginning.

    Like you I had a plan of tapering
    And
    It really didn't take any more planning or stressing..

    It was thought out and successful before me
    So all I had to do was follow the suggestions and carry on!

    You are going into the best profession in the world.
    The opportunities are endless..

    That is enough to get you going when you get bummed out .
    Not all days are perfect but having what you have in front of you .
    You will do great!
    You got this!

    Bette
    Last edited by Anonymous; 04-30-2017 at 06:29 PM.

  9. #39
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Iluv2smile View Post
    Julz
    Checking in to see how you are doing?
    Sounds like you got this..

    As you know it does take awhile for the brain to stopping craving quick fixes..
    But I would just imagine thoughts going out of my mind
    Just like they came in.

    I don't mean just craving thoughts
    I mean thoughts that required a quick fix for anything ..
    like you said you just gave in to the sleeplessness ..
    kind of like surrendering to our addiction ..
    It takes the power away..

    We just learn that our brains can and do lie to us..,
    Especially in the beginning.

    Like you I had a plan of tapering
    And
    It really didn't take any more planning or stressing..

    It was thought out and successful before me
    So all I had to do was follow the suggestions and carry on!

    You are going into the best profession in the world.
    The opportunities are endless..

    That is enough to get you going when you get bummed out .
    Not all days are perfect but having what you have in front of you .
    You will do great!
    You got this!

    Bette
    Hey better. Im doing okay...... had a fight with my husband about money today that turned into a full blown divorce. He is nasty when it comes to money. We have 2 kids together, just bought the house but have been legally separated on paper which is very tricky for me. I have not thought of using, but am thinking of running the bastard over with my car lol. People are so crazy when it comes to money..... every guy feels like they were used. Ive been with him for 7 years..... what a shame. All about money. Some people will be rich and lonely.......
    Had a headache today but been trying to eat right drink lots of water, vitamins and 2 short yoga sessions. I do have this.... finally
    Julz

  10. #40
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Wow so i guess i truly am getting a divorce. He said it was inevitable and a long time coming....... how people can get when it comes down to money. We bought a house, but for me to get money for school we are separated and legally divorced a few years back. Been living together for a while. Had 2 kids. Now he says im not entitled to the house and if we take it to court, he will bring my past up, have me pinned for fraud and take full custody....... i am shocked. Said its been bad for a while now. We just had a great time lately so im kinda lost...... we came close to breaking up but this time this is it. Holy hell........ i dont know how im keeping it together right now. I guess my intense and unrelenting snger is stopping me from breaking into tears. I paid for my own degree, i have no license, no job, no money and no assets. Cars and house are all on his name. Im screwed here. After raising his 2 kids for 7 goddam years he does this to me saying i have put them through hell for so long..... he found out 3 years ago i had an addiction, because i told everyone and asked for help. My oarents paid for rehab 2 ywars ago and i was gone for 30 days so he keep mentioning it every chance he gets; "you left us for 30 days".
    Im sure i can find someone else but im just so damn angry. Im day 3 on 3mg tapering, finally getting better and this all got blown out of proportion because he is insecure (always has been) that i am with him for money. If i was why i am penny less snd homeless?????? Anyways, im not s quitter. I am studying my butt of for my licensing exam, finished my resume and going forward with everything. I will trust that god has my back and that everything will be okay. I have had worse odds against me many times. This will be a piece of cake. I just breaking up my 2 kids with him and my son he took as his own from 18 months..... its sab. It will break their heart. Best thing i can do is keep my feelings and fighting out of their ear shots. Last thing i need is them blaming themselves.......
    How life can turn and had you rotten lemons....... trying to see the silver lining.....

  11. #41
    dsh12345 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
    Posts
    618

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ricecrispy1111 View Post
    Wow so i guess i truly am getting a divorce. He said it was inevitable and a long time coming....... how people can get when it comes down to money. We bought a house, but for me to get money for school we are separated and legally divorced a few years back. Been living together for a while. Had 2 kids. Now he says im not entitled to the house and if we take it to court, he will bring my past up, have me pinned for fraud and take full custody....... i am shocked. Said its been bad for a while now. We just had a great time lately so im kinda lost...... we came close to breaking up but this time this is it. Holy hell........ i dont know how im keeping it together right now. I guess my intense and unrelenting snger is stopping me from breaking into tears. I paid for my own degree, i have no license, no job, no money and no assets. Cars and house are all on his name. Im screwed here. After raising his 2 kids for 7 goddam years he does this to me saying i have put them through hell for so long..... he found out 3 years ago i had an addiction, because i told everyone and asked for help. My oarents paid for rehab 2 ywars ago and i was gone for 30 days so he keep mentioning it every chance he gets; "you left us for 30 days".
    Im sure i can find someone else but im just so damn angry. Im day 3 on 3mg tapering, finally getting better and this all got blown out of proportion because he is insecure (always has been) that i am with him for money. If i was why i am penny less snd homeless?????? Anyways, im not s quitter. I am studying my butt of for my licensing exam, finished my resume and going forward with everything. I will trust that god has my back and that everything will be okay. I have had worse odds against me many times. This will be a piece of cake. I just breaking up my 2 kids with him and my son he took as his own from 18 months..... its sab. It will break their heart. Best thing i can do is keep my feelings and fighting out of their ear shots. Last thing i need is them blaming themselves.......
    How life can turn and had you rotten lemons....... trying to see the silver lining.....


    It's hard to respond to something like that. I can't just say a couple sentences to help make that situation go away, but I wanna at least leave some kind of response so that you are know you aren't alone and your story is being heard. I'll just list out some random thguhts I had when I come across a story like that.


    - Is something like this the real deal? Or does this kind of stuff likely blow over in a week?
    - What will you do to support yourself? A divorce process takes tons of time and lawyers to work out, do you have a safe place to stay if he asks you to leave?
    - There are always two sides to every story. That's a mantra I live by, and I never judge without hearing both sides. That being said, it's like not we're bringing your husband on here to get his take obviously. But, perhaps there could be some truth to what he is saying in the sense that the past couple days to weeks to months to years(?) an opiate problem can take its toll, and he might have felt you aren't the same person he married these past months (i've seen ppl on methadone turn into zombies), and it's intensified these past couple days as the subs taper has started and taken its toll and you are DEFINITELY not your normal happy self right now so maybe he thinks he are falling deeper into the hole when really you are actually well on your way to climbing your way out and beating this forever. Does he understand how far you are coming along in your recovery and that maybe the low energy you these past days to weeks is part of the recovery process and is actually a sign your brain is healing and getting closer to being happy sober you instead of the opposite where from his end it looks like you are slowly dying (which he is probably tying to the toll caused by your habit and not the recovery)? Can that be explained easily to him?
    - Don't let this be a barrier to your ongoing recovery. It's very easy to justify yourself into relapsing based on unfortunate life events like a death in the family. I heard a story of someone who finally checked into 28 day residential rehab..... I mean all you gotta do is stay there and you are guaranteed to come out at day 29 off your opiate dependence... probably the best option there is to make it 30 days clean. What you do when you are out is your own decision, but you will make it to 30 days clean and feel good off opiates with a 28 day residential program..... he left after 14 days because some step-uncle died... that's how he justified it and he's back to using.
    - I can't relate to hearing news like that. But I do know I was in without question the darkest period of my life in Nov-Dec 2016. Just lost my job, no money, bills piling up, credit score tanked due to a mistake in my report, H habit getting out of control, frantic call to suppliers, never wanted to leave the house even to get a haircut or go to gas station to refill on essentials like bottled water.... I would ask my supplier to stop by the gas station by myt house to pick up some bottled water on the way to my place.. that's how bad I was stuck in the house not wanting to leave. That bad turn was the impetus to improve myself and start climbing out of it... not get deeper into it and completely lose myself which could have easily happened.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 05-01-2017 at 11:48 AM.

  12. #42
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by dsh12345 View Post
    It's hard to respond to something like that. I can't just say a couple sentences to help make that situation go away, but I wanna at least leave some kind of response so that you are know you aren't alone and your story is being heard. I'll just list out some random thguhts I had when I come across a story like that.


    - Is something like this the real deal? Or does this kind of stuff likely blow over in a week?
    - What will you do to support yourself? A divorce process takes tons of time and lawyers to work out, do you have a safe place to stay if he asks you to leave?
    - There are always two sides to every story. That's a mantra I live by, and I never judge without hearing both sides. That being said, it's like not we're bringing your husband on here to get his take obviously. But, perhaps there could be some truth to what he is saying in the sense that the past couple days to weeks to months to years(?) an opiate problem can take its toll, and he might have felt you aren't the same person he married these past months (i've seen ppl on methadone turn into zombies), and it's intensified these past couple days as the subs taper has started and taken its toll and you are DEFINITELY not your normal happy self right now so maybe he thinks he are falling deeper into the hole when really you are actually well on your way to climbing your way out and beating this forever. Does he understand how far you are coming along in your recovery and that maybe the low energy you these past days to weeks is part of the recovery process and is actually a sign your brain is healing and getting closer to being happy sober you instead of the opposite where from his end it looks like you are slowly dying (which he is probably tying to the toll caused by your habit and not the recovery)? Can that be explained easily to him?
    - Don't let this be a barrier to your ongoing recovery. It's very easy to justify yourself into relapsing based on unfortunate life events like a death in the family. I heard a story of someone who finally checked into 28 day residential rehab..... I mean all you gotta do is stay there and you are guaranteed to come out at day 29 off your opiate dependence... probably the best option there is to make it 30 days clean. What you do when you are out is your own decision, but you will make it to 30 days clean and feel good off opiates with a 28 day residential program..... he left after 14 days because some step-uncle died... that's how he justified it and he's back to using.
    - I can't relate to hearing news like that. But I do know I was in without question the darkest period of my life in Nov-Dec 2016. Just lost my job, no money, bills piling up, credit score tanked due to a mistake in my report, H habit getting out of control, frantic call to suppliers, never wanted to leave the house even to get a haircut or go to gas station to refill on essentials like bottled water.... I would ask my supplier to stop by the gas station by myt house to pick up some bottled water on the way to my place.. that's how bad I was stuck in the house not wanting to leave. That bad turn was the impetus to improve myself and start climbing out of it... not get deeper into it and completely lose myself which could have easily happened.
    Hey dash! Wow. You are def one with wiseness snd great points. I have been a high functioning addicts for the mist part. I have been putting on a face and being there for my family. I guess yes, addiction takes its toll but i have fought my addiction from day 1. The guimt misery, regret. I never cleared out bank accounts, sold anything or gone deep. I spent my own money whuch does not matter niw. Whats done is done. I will not let this 'change' hinder my recovery. When you change your vibration and your mind about your present, people fall away to accomodate a newer healthier you; this is exactly that. God is peeling away unnecessary people that do not serve my greatest good no more. I am okay. Going forward. Nothing will get between me and my sobriety and my kids. It all came doen to money, insecurity and being tired and worn down from this addiction. I have zero regrets. Some anger right now because it came out of lrfy fiekd, not it will be okay. I have supportive parents and amazing 3 kids that love me and i love them more than anything. No excuses here.
    Thanjs for sharing a piece of your past. I am very proud of you. How are your symptoms at 0 for like 5-6 days?

  13. #43
    dsh12345 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
    Posts
    618

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ricecrispy1111 View Post
    Hey dash! Wow. You are def one with wiseness snd great points. I have been a high functioning addicts for the mist part. I have been putting on a face and being there for my family. I guess yes, addiction takes its toll but i have fought my addiction from day 1. The guimt misery, regret. I never cleared out bank accounts, sold anything or gone deep. I spent my own money whuch does not matter niw. Whats done is done. I will not let this 'change' hinder my recovery. When you change your vibration and your mind about your present, people fall away to accomodate a newer healthier you; this is exactly that. God is peeling away unnecessary people that do not serve my greatest good no more. I am okay. Going forward. Nothing will get between me and my sobriety and my kids. It all came doen to money, insecurity and being tired and worn down from this addiction. I have zero regrets. Some anger right now because it came out of lrfy fiekd, not it will be okay. I have supportive parents and amazing 3 kids that love me and i love them more than anything. No excuses here.
    Thanjs for sharing a piece of your past. I am very proud of you. How are your symptoms at 0 for like 5-6 days?
    I 100% can honestly say I felt zero problems after the jump, and most of my WD's were likely done with somewhere in the 0.50 down to 0.125mg range. I went pretty low. Four days of 0.125mg followed by a plan to do 1 and then 2 skip days. I did 1 skip day, and on the dosing day after that, I continued to feel fine, so I said what's the point, and day 4 of 0.125mg became my last day. I am still feeling fine and great 6 days out from sub, no problems. Sleep is fine, falling asleep, staying asleep, falling back asleep all immediately fine after the jump. The fact that I planned skip days and then didn't even have to do them is a testament to how easy my final jump was.

    Again, remember the process is fair. Each moment of discomfort during your taper is less discomfort you gotta pay during the jump. It all goes into the bank of the total amount of discomfort you gotta pay before your brain can lose its opiate tolerance.


    This sounds like it's gonna be a messy situation. The official separation/divorce a couple years back, but still living together in the same house, still supporting each other, him working while you focus on training for nursing.... that all goes towards an argument I guess that while you guys were technically separated, in reality and in practice you guys were still together.

    I am no lawyer whatsoever and am in no position to give any legal advice, but that situation sounds like a messy one that the divorce lawyers are gonna duke it out over. I hope that goes well, I hope the stress isn't too bad, and I hope you have good arrangements if you gotta leave the house. Stay strong, stick to the plan. Getting clean will make this whole process so much easier, that is one giant boulder off your back if you can get thru the taper and then focus all your energies into dealing with this situation. Good luck ok.

  14. #44
    Join Date
    Feb 2017
    Posts
    124

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ricecrispy1111 View Post
    Wow so i guess i truly am getting a divorce. He said it was inevitable and a long time coming....... how people can get when it comes down to money. We bought a house, but for me to get money for school we are separated and legally divorced a few years back. Been living together for a while. Had 2 kids. Now he says im not entitled to the house and if we take it to court, he will bring my past up, have me pinned for fraud and take full custody....... i am shocked. Said its been bad for a while now. We just had a great time lately so im kinda lost...... we came close to breaking up but this time this is it. Holy hell........ i dont know how im keeping it together right now. I guess my intense and unrelenting snger is stopping me from breaking into tears. I paid for my own degree, i have no license, no job, no money and no assets. Cars and house are all on his name. Im screwed here. After raising his 2 kids for 7 goddam years he does this to me saying i have put them through hell for so long..... he found out 3 years ago i had an addiction, because i told everyone and asked for help. My oarents paid for rehab 2 ywars ago and i was gone for 30 days so he keep mentioning it every chance he gets; "you left us for 30 days".
    Im sure i can find someone else but im just so damn angry. Im day 3 on 3mg tapering, finally getting better and this all got blown out of proportion because he is insecure (always has been) that i am with him for money. If i was why i am penny less snd homeless?????? Anyways, im not s quitter. I am studying my butt of for my licensing exam, finished my resume and going forward with everything. I will trust that god has my back and that everything will be okay. I have had worse odds against me many times. This will be a piece of cake. I just breaking up my 2 kids with him and my son he took as his own from 18 months..... its sab. It will break their heart. Best thing i can do is keep my feelings and fighting out of their ear shots. Last thing i need is them blaming themselves.......
    How life can turn and had you rotten lemons....... trying to see the silver lining.....
    Hey Rice, Where to begin....gosh. I don't even know what to say. I am truly sorry for what you are enduring and going through at this moment in Your life. However, when life hands you lemons, you gotta make lemonade. As DSH said, what can one say here and there is two sides to every story and I dont judge either. I know what your going through now is hard, beyond hard; but remember, you've already progressed and made it this far. Keep doing what your doing, do not let him get to you or in your head; that is how you lose the battle, but its not to late to win the war

    Has this been an ongoing issue with you and him? like break up to makeup on a regular basis? I know money can make friends your enemy, I cant imagine what it could do to families. You need to fight through this if indeed thats the road he plans to take. May I ask why you never secured yourself? Why you never had him add your name to any of your "combined" assets? Was it because he was in control most of the time or it made him feel more manly that he could control everything or dangle that over you at any given time? Continue venting here....it really helps and is very therapeutic. We are here for you to offer as much support as possible. Keep posting? Let us know how you're doing? Good luck and may God bless you through this rough patch in your life as this too shall pass....
    Iluv2smile likes this.

  15. #45
    dsh12345 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
    Posts
    618

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by hopingtobeclean View Post
    Hey Rice, Where to begin....gosh. I don't even know what to say. I am truly sorry for what you are enduring and going through at this moment in Your life. However, when life hands you lemons, you gotta make lemonade. As DSH said, what can one say here and there is two sides to every story and I dont judge either. I know what your going through now is hard, beyond hard; but remember, you've already progressed and made it this far. Keep doing what your doing, do not let him get to you or in your head; that is how you lose the battle, but its not to late to win the war

    Has this been an ongoing issue with you and him? like break up to makeup on a regular basis? I know money can make friends your enemy, I cant imagine what it could do to families. You need to fight through this if indeed thats the road he plans to take. May I ask why you never secured yourself? Why you never had him add your name to any of your "combined" assets? Was it because he was in control most of the time or it made him feel more manly that he could control everything or dangle that over you at any given time? Continue venting here....it really helps and is very therapeutic. We are here for you to offer as much support as possible. Keep posting? Let us know how you're doing? Good luck and may God bless you through this rough patch in your life as this too shall pass....


    Could definitely see how that kind of arrangement could happen. You get back together with the SO in practice (aka living together), but you never cross that line to un-do the separation paperwork and get your name added back onto the house because that's the line in the sand that makes being together again "official" so to speak(and no one wants to broach the topic), so things stay in this netherworld in between officially and unofficially back together. Also, sounds like the majority of the income/house payments as of late was being brought in by the husband during this time (as rice was retraining for new career in nursing), so I'm sure from the husband's standpoint he's thinking he wants to protect the assets he views as his (the house) as he's making all the payments and this getting back together again and living together can all end at any given moment so no way he's the one bringing up the topic of officially sharing the assets. From her standpoint, bringing up the topic can force the husband to a decision right then and there, and if the answer is "no" then that's it it's over again right then and there as far as I'm concerned, and she might have thought things weren't there yet enough to bring that up and get a "yes" answer and more time was needed before making that move and officially asking for 100% commitment from both sides again.

    Dunno, I'm just speculating with absolutely no actual knowledge of the situation. Just discussion for discussion sake, to throw it out there. I'm no lawyer, but I understand why each person is entitled to half even if one person has no income and the other has been the sole breadwinner by a big margin. The woman (usually its the woman, come on now I'll just say it) makes sacrifices in her career, stays home watches the kids, stabilizes the family/house, etc which allows the man to flourish/focus in his career, so the 2 of them are very much one single inseparable united unit where each of the ppl made important and critical life decisions together based on what the other person was gonna be doing, so during the split it has to be 50/50 regardless of income inequality.

    I just hope it works out for you in the end, and that appropriate arrangements can be made to make sure you are in a safe situation if you have to leave the house. Obviously, the lawyers will fight this out if it comes to that, as living together/co-depending on each other with her going back to training knowing that she was financially secure with the (ex)husband bringing in income has to count somehow towards an argument that things should be 50/50 even if separated officially on the paperwork. Again, no lawyer, just running my mouth and spilling my thoughts which are always therapeutic for me no matter the topic.

    Hang in there, keep your sobriety off full opiates. This is the stuff that can take us down if we choose to let it.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 05-03-2017 at 05:49 PM.

  16. #46
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by hopingtobeclean View Post
    Hey Rice, Where to begin....gosh. I don't even know what to say. I am truly sorry for what you are enduring and going through at this moment in Your life. However, when life hands you lemons, you gotta make lemonade. As DSH said, what can one say here and there is two sides to every story and I do nt judge either. I know what your going through now is hard, beyond hard; but remember, you've already progressed and made it this far. Keep doing what your doing, do not let him get to you or in your head; that is how you lose the battle, but its not to late to win the war

    Has this been an ongoing issue with you and him? like break up to makeup on a regular basis? I know money can make friends your enemy, I cant imagine what it could do to families. You need to fight through this if indeed thats the road he plans to take. May I ask why you never secured yourself? Why you never had him add your name to any of your "combined" assets? Was it because he was in control most of the time or it made him feel more manly that he could control everything or dangle that over you at any given time? Continue venting here....it really helps and is very therapeutic. We are here for you to offer as much support as possible. Keep posting? Let us know how you're doing? Good luck and may God bless you through this rough patch in your life as this too shall pass....
    Hey hopingtogetclen!!
    Well its a long story but no, it has not been ongoing. It came out of nowhere; i guess he had pent up anger towards me. I had cosmetic surgery (i paid for myself) and was battling addiction for a while...... he was just angry. It came out about money but in the end its how he felt. He said "i dont want to be with you anymore". We were together one moment and the next we fight about money, i when im angry, shut down and dont talk to not say anything i will regret; he on the other hand is in my face just making everything worse saying we fix it now or its over. He is a hot headed redhead....... i dont reply or engage and he takes it as "i dont care". It escalated and now its just gone........ i am looking at a place and signed lease for a year. Moving out july 1st. Im hurting for sure. Its really weird. Ive been with him 7 years. Before him for 2 years with my first sons dad. I have always been a faithful relationship kind of woman. Never really been single.

    Dash, i like it when you ramble on thought ideas. Its complicated why on paper we were divorced. I did it to get more money for school applying as a single mom living elsewhere. I screwed myself. I gave 7 years raised his kids shile he built his business (btw i paid for my own school- debt piled up on me not us). I dont want to fight though. Im having a hard enough time orocessing thus all. It all happened so fast. Kinda like a car crash leave you wondering wtf just happened. I have thrown myself into studying for my board exam, found a place to rent, been cooking and putting on a brave face, but im hurting. Its hard to breathe with this chest crushing anxiety thinking sbout where my life is going.
    Today is day 2 on 2.25 from 3mg snd im FEELING it. Gee i woke up with body spasms, crushing anxiety and its hard to breathe....... this is all so messed up. I just need to focus on what i have and not what i had.....
    Life does give me a lot of lemons these days; when it rains it pours.
    Julz

  17. #47
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2014
    Posts
    3,107

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ricecrispy1111 View Post
    Hey hopingtogetclen!!
    Well its a long story but no, it has not been ongoing. It came out of nowhere; i guess he had pent up anger towards me. I had cosmetic surgery (i paid for myself) and was battling addiction for a while...... he was just angry. It came out about money but in the end its how he felt. He said "i dont want to be with you anymore". We were together one moment and the next we fight about money, i when im angry, shut down and dont talk to not say anything i will regret; he on the other hand is in my face just making everything worse saying we fix it now or its over. He is a hot headed redhead....... i dont reply or engage and he takes it as "i dont care". It escalated and now its just gone........ i am looking at a place and signed lease for a year. Moving out july 1st. Im hurting for sure. Its really weird. Ive been with him 7 years. Before him for 2 years with my first sons dad. I have always been a faithful relationship kind of woman. Never really been single.

    Dash, i like it when you ramble on thought ideas. Its complicated why on paper we were divorced. I did it to get more money for school applying as a single mom living elsewhere. I screwed myself. I gave 7 years raised his kids shile he built his business (btw i paid for my own school- debt piled up on me not us). I dont want to fight though. Im having a hard enough time orocessing thus all. It all happened so fast. Kinda like a car crash leave you wondering wtf just happened. I have thrown myself into studying for my board exam, found a place to rent, been cooking and putting on a brave face, but im hurting. Its hard to breathe with this chest crushing anxiety thinking sbout where my life is going.
    Today is day 2 on 2.25 from 3mg snd im FEELING it. Gee i woke up with body spasms, crushing anxiety and its hard to breathe....... this is all so messed up. I just need to focus on what i have and not what i had.....
    Life does give me a lot of lemons these days; when it rains it pours.
    Julz

    Hi Juiz -

    I'm so sorry to hear about all of this. I can't imagine the hurt you must be feeling. Wish I had the words to make you feel better.

    I just wanted to say something about the subs. Now might not be the best time to continue with the taper? Theres nothing wrong with spending a little time on the current dose until you sort out the personal issues. You're dealing with 2 things right now and that has to weigh heavily on you. Taking a step back and waiting a bit before tapering further may allow you time to figue this all out. I'm not saying stay on on the subs for months, but maybe a week or 2 on 2.25mg will be a great help. Won't hurt a thing.

    All the best Juiz.

    Randy

  18. #48
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Randy35 View Post
    Hi Juiz -

    I'm so sorry to hear about all of this. I can't imagine the hurt you must be feeling. Wish I had the words to make you feel better.

    I just wanted to say something about the subs. Now might not be the best time to continue with the taper? Theres nothing wrong with spending a little time on the current dose until you sort out the personal issues. You're dealing with 2 things right now and that has to weigh heavily on you. Taking a step back and waiting a bit before tapering further may allow you time to figue this all out. I'm not saying stay on on the subs for months, but maybe a week or 2 on 2.25mg will be a great help. Won't hurt a thing.

    All the best Juiz.

    Randy
    Hey everyone and Randy.
    First I wanted to thank you so much for all the support and love that I have been feeling from you guys it has helped so much you can't even imagine. I'm still going strong day three on 2.25 and going to continue my drop as previously expected.
    So a lot of things of happened yesterday. Right before I went to sign for the lease for a year I sent a message to my ex asking him if this is what he truly wanted because once I move out I'm moving on with my life I just wanted a for sure no as he was acting and saying mean things to me telling me he doesn't want to be with me. His answer was I don't know and he asked me what I think and I said I don't want to be with you if you don't want to be with me". He said don't sign please. Let's talk about it this evening. I went to see the place the place is perfect for me it's the perfect location the perfect price. The guy said that it's mine if I wanted I asked for an extension until the evening. The conversation did not go so well she didn't get my point I understood his point and there was not much middleground I was very angry and hurt and wanted to get that place. I told him I am going to take the place I went upstairs to text the landlord and instead I asked him an extension until the morning to sleep on it but then I'm thinking of taking it. Within 10 minutes my ex barged in the door with our 11 month old that could not breathe and was having really weird sounds coming out of him. It sounded like croup although I never heard it I knew that that's what it was. He could not take a breath he was not feeling good. He wasn't waking up either. I freaked out and ran into the car and took him to the hospital. They rushed us right in And they took really good care of us gave him some steroids and now he's OK. It's just a viral infection but God gave me a sign and I decided to listen. If it was just me I would be gone doing my thing but we have three kids and if you wants to work on things and I still have feelings for him which I do. We owe it to our children to try and keep our family together and not be selfish and do what I want to do out of anger. Obviously there's a lot to work on there's a lot of hurt and pain to work through because I don't feel the same as I did before so we will see how this goes. I called this morning and I said no to the apartment. I believe that God will take care of me and if I need to place later after I get my license and after I do everything I need to and get a job I will find a place I have faith.
    As for the taper yesterday was a really rough day I had so much anxiety especially in the morning when I wake up I split the Dells 1.25 in the morning 7 AM and then 1 mg at 3 PM no the evening I'm fine it's the mornings and the night I'm having trouble with I'm sleeping OK thanks to a sleep aid which I will worry about it later I really do need my sleep. Today I woke up and the 1.25 held me off much better than yesterday so I guess I just need to take it day by day obviously going through everything that I'm going through and having to study and having to worry about supporting myself and my children on my own was a big burden on my shoulders which I still kind of have. But right now I have to focus on my kids and what they need; I might slow down the taper and not do 25% maybe do a little bit less to lessen the blow because I need to be functional and I have been putting on a brave face but I know that my energy affects everyone in the house especially my kids and it's not fair for them.
    Thank you so much for checking in and for caring and for loving and for being really good to me I needed this so much thank you I can't explain how grateful I am for all your support.
    Julz
    Lvg nghtmare and Iluv2smile like this.

  19. #49
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Sorry for disappearing for a while. I was really good! I am down to 0.75 mg today. Its been alright i guess but its rough now. Anxiety has been better nowadays. I must recommend one thing to all the people that will read this!!! Watch e-motion. You can find it for free online. This movie has inspired me to make a huge chage and made me realize that our past traumas and negative emotions guide our daily reactions and our addiction habits. Please watch and let me know.
    Everything calmed down at home. It got bad before it got okay. We are actually working on our issues. Im getting ready to write my nursing exam in next 2 weeks (did not get registration papers yet). Ive been really busy but im proud to say i have not had a moment of thought about using my DOC for soothing or any excuse i would have used. I actually think i might be over this addiction for good!
    Julz

  20. #50
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Been a really rough day today. Day 1 of 0.75mg from 1mg. Never ending headache, despite drinking water, and full on body aches. The fatigue is overwhelming. Laundry took 3 times longer than usual. I move soooo slow. Not the best day but at least i gave been productive throughout it all. Cant wait for this to be over but will not rush it either.

  21. #51
    Prettytony is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2016
    Posts
    42

    Default

    This is how I do it. I started on 16mg sub 2 yrs ago 8 when I woke up and 8 when I went to bed. Now I'm down to 3mg. I've found it's best to take it all in the morning. You get maximum medicine so you don't just feel ok all the time. You feel good and it lasts all the way till the next morning 24 hours later. When taking he sub it's best to have a clean mouth, but not a dry one. I take a drink water to get the blood vessels under the tongue lubed up. Once I put the sub under the tongue I do not put anything else in my mouth for 1 hour. Even tho the sub may have dissolved doesn't mean it's been fully absorbed and eating, drinking, or god forbid spitting could interrupt the full amount from gaining access to the bloodstream via the vessels under the tongue. You won't feel instantly better, atleast I don't, it takes a good hour. But being in such a small amount doesn't make sense to take 1mg 3x a day. I want as much medicine filling up my receptors as possible at the same time.

  22. #52
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Prettytony View Post
    This is how I do it. I started on 16mg sub 2 yrs ago 8 when I woke up and 8 when I went to bed. Now I'm down to 3mg. I've found it's best to take it all in the morning. You get maximum medicine so you don't just feel ok all the time. You feel good and it lasts all the way till the next morning 24 hours later. When taking he sub it's best to have a clean mouth, but not a dry one. I take a drink water to get the blood vessels under the tongue lubed up. Once I put the sub under the tongue I do not put anything else in my mouth for 1 hour. Even tho the sub may have dissolved doesn't mean it's been fully absorbed and eating, drinking, or god forbid spitting could interrupt the full amount from gaining access to the bloodstream via the vessels under the tongue. You won't feel instantly better, atleast I don't, it takes a good hour. But being in such a small amount doesn't make sense to take 1mg 3x a day. I want as much medicine filling up my receptors as possible at the same time.
    Ya i take it all at once when i wake up. I have been extremely physically and mentally fatigued but this morning i went to the gym and pushed HARD. Are you tapering every 4 days or so? I find that now is more challenging but im so close i can feel the freedom. Wont rush it but getting excited.
    Julz

  23. #53
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    235

    Default

    Hi Julz! For some reason I didn't read about your situation with your husband until now. Is your son better? Croup sucks so much!!! My daughter had it a lot when she was little. It's good they outgrow it. If you get a chance to get his tonsils and adenoids out I highly recommend it if he has frequent sinus/ cold issues. Try tyrosine for the symptoms. I found.75 and .5 hard tapers for the body aches. Icy hot has been my best friend in that regard.

    Please don't be afraid to leave your husband if it is the right thing to do. Do you depend on him for income?

  24. #54
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Justfortodaytx View Post
    Hi Julz! For some reason I didn't read about your situation with your husband until now. Is your son better? Croup sucks so much!!! My daughter had it a lot when she was little. It's good they outgrow it. If you get a chance to get his tonsils and adenoids out I highly recommend it if he has frequent sinus/ cold issues. Try tyrosine for the symptoms. I found.75 and .5 hard tapers for the body aches. Icy hot has been my best friend in that regard.

    Please don't be afraid to leave your husband if it is the right thing to do. Do you depend on him for income?
    Sorry for the late reply; its been real rough the last little while. I went from 0.75 to 0.5 and wow it hit me hard. Even with sleep aid that kept me asleep mostly, i got at most 3-4 hrs and had aches, SUPER ANXIETY, feeling lost, killer headaches and throbbing back pain at the lower disks on the right. Feels like a nail is drivven into my spine. Today is day 4 on 0.5. I got my registration papers yesterday so im sending them in with my payment and el be registering for the exam shortly. I just feel so weak and out of it that studying is real tough. The headaches are there daily and intensify in morning and evening. I guess at this point nothing except time will help.

    I must say im quite disappointed with the forum; ive always had support in the past and all so when i didnt post for 2.5 weeks its like everyone disappeared and dont post or support anymore. I posted a few posts while i was really struggling and feeling bad almost losing hope and no response, or messages. I guess i got spoiled with so much support that i felt abandoned at such a critical point shere i am so low on sub and so close to my goal that a bit of "hey its gonna b okay you are almost there" would have made a difference.

    Anyways I am going to have a great day and will fight for my future and freedom. Wishing all the strugglers and warriors a safe and joyfilled day! You can all do it you just need to find that inner inspiration and you can and will do the 'impossible' because it is possible!!!
    I am here for you too if you have any questions. The struggle has a purpose; it makes you stronger and you also appreciate the light after long darkness unlike taking it for granted. You can do it!!!!

  25. #55
    Starz3 is offline Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    117

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ricecrispy1111 View Post
    Sorry for the late reply; its been real rough the last little while. I went from 0.75 to 0.5 and wow it hit me hard. Even with sleep aid that kept me asleep mostly, i got at most 3-4 hrs and had aches, SUPER ANXIETY, feeling lost, killer headaches and throbbing back pain at the lower disks on the right. Feels like a nail is drivven into my spine. Today is day 4 on 0.5. I got my registration papers yesterday so im sending them in with my payment and el be registering for the exam shortly. I just feel so weak and out of it that studying is real tough. The headaches are there daily and intensify in morning and evening. I guess at this point nothing except time will help.

    I must say im quite disappointed with the forum; ive always had support in the past and all so when i didnt post for 2.5 weeks its like everyone disappeared and dont post or support anymore. I posted a few posts while i was really struggling and feeling bad almost losing hope and no response, or messages. I guess i got spoiled with so much support that i felt abandoned at such a critical point shere i am so low on sub and so close to my goal that a bit of "hey its gonna b okay you are almost there" would have made a difference.

    Anyways I am going to have a great day and will fight for my future and freedom. Wishing all the strugglers and warriors a safe and joyfilled day! You can all do it you just need to find that inner inspiration and you can and will do the 'impossible' because it is possible!!!
    I am here for you too if you have any questions. The struggle has a purpose; it makes you stronger and you also appreciate the light after long darkness unlike taking it for granted. You can do it!!!!
    Hey! I just read your thread through~you're doing amazing!! I'm adding it to my home page so I can check on you each day!! I'm tapering down to .125 from .25 tmrw. I'll be here for you!

  26. #56
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Starz3 View Post
    Hey! I just read your thread through~you're doing amazing!! I'm adding it to my home page so I can check on you each day!! I'm tapering down to .125 from .25 tmrw. I'll be here for you!
    Hey stars! Thanks for coming in and saying hello. Going to 0.375 tomorrow. Going down strong but its been sooooo hard physically, mentally and emotionally

  27. #57
    Starz3 is offline Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    117

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ricecrispy1111 View Post
    Hey stars! Thanks for coming in and saying hello. Going to 0.375 tomorrow. Going down strong but its been sooooo hard physically, mentally and emotionally
    I know what you mean! I'm definitely not looking forward to the PAWS stuff either. I haven't had a difficult time tapering other than terrible hot and some cold flashes~a little bit of insomnia, which I'm taking gabapentin and hydroxizine for now~seems to be working, luckily!

  28. #58
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Starz3 View Post
    I know what you mean! I'm definitely not looking forward to the PAWS stuff either. I haven't had a difficult time tapering other than terrible hot and some cold flashes~a little bit of insomnia, which I'm taking gabapentin and hydroxizine for now~seems to be working, luckily!
    I have bad body aches and spasms that wake me up in the first 2/3 days of taper. The days seem to drag out sooo long :/
    Today is day 5 of 0.5. I decided to make it another day because im not truly stable but getting there. Its such a slow long recovery but i finally know there are no shortcuts. Hope you are having a good easy day
    Tomorrow to 0.375 for me. I divided the sub into little baggies and labelled it all until i get to 0.125 then jump. Mentally its tough and the physical w/d suck

  29. #59
    Starz3 is offline Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    117

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ricecrispy1111 View Post
    I have bad body aches and spasms that wake me up in the first 2/3 days of taper. The days seem to drag out sooo long :/
    Today is day 5 of 0.5. I decided to make it another day because im not truly stable but getting there. Its such a slow long recovery but i finally know there are no shortcuts. Hope you are having a good easy day
    Tomorrow to 0.375 for me. I divided the sub into little baggies and labelled it all until i get to 0.125 then jump. Mentally its tough and the physical w/d suck
    I'm taking another day at .25 today. I was not feeling good at all on the smaller dose this morning. Just have to get through one more night of work tonight then have a week off.

  30. #60
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Starz3 View Post
    I'm taking another day at .25 today. I was not feeling good at all on the smaller dose this morning. Just have to get through one more night of work tonight then have a week off.
    Hey stars! Hope you are feeling better today. Are you a nurse too? I remember you saying something. I dont know how you do it but i guess being busy takes your mind off your symptoms but you are a trooper!!!!
    I am day 1 at 0.375. Slept 8 hrs with my sleep aid so i know the body was ready to drop. I took an extra day on 0.5.
    My lower back ache is constant; i pray its just the w/d. 7 years ago i had setious back problems that even physio could not fix, then i got pregnant with my daughter and a miracle happened; my disks slipped into place. But it feels like that now. Its not bad enough to take any pain relief but its constant and goinv into my hip bones from right flank :/
    My RAS (arms) is acting up this morning. I feel intense overwhelming anxiety which totally takes over at times. It comes in waves. I dont wanna rush the process but this sucks so badly. I havent been to the gym in a while. I have no energy, physically or mentally but i know that pushing myself will create endorphins....
    When do the body aches subside and go away? Anxiety??? This is normal right???
    Been drinking a TON of water, headaches come n go.
    NEVER AGAIN WILL I GO THROUGH THIS HELL
    Julz

Page 2 of 6 FirstFirst 1234 ... LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 100
    Last Post: 10-29-2017, 10:15 AM
  2. Replies: 49
    Last Post: 11-09-2016, 04:13 PM
  3. Started Suboxone: Feeling better than ever.
    By jerseyjoey in forum Prescription Drug Addiction
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 05-08-2014, 12:45 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22