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Is there happiness after opiate addiction?
  1. #1
    Trout908 is offline Member
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    Default Is there happiness after opiate addiction?

    I have been using opiates for 7 years. Mainly hydros 10/325..
    I have CT three times in last year and this last time experienced the depression.
    I am ready to quit but scared of course. I am depressed now taking 40-50mg per day, I know this will get worse with W/D..
    I have two boys age 6 and 8 with a great husband who will help.
    However he gets tired of a mopey sick person after a few days. Last time I got out of the depression by relapsing..
    Just wandering if you are ever happy after taking opiates?

  2. #2
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    Hi there ..
    Yes there is life after opiates ..
    You could have been going through PAWS
    Post acute withdrawal syndrome..
    It Sometimes happens after a person is finally off of opiates after years of use..
    The depression and lethargy is normal it is your brain learning to function , refire without opiates ..
    I have relapsed too because of the same issues..
    This time I did research and found that it will pass..
    If you start doing things to to help your brain heal..
    Exercise
    Healthy eating
    Laughing
    Stating hydrated..
    Eating spicey foods..
    Feeling a sense of accomplishment..
    Anything that makes the brain prodeuce those feel good endorphins or the natural morphine it is capable of producing on its own without opiates..

    There is a lot more info on this now and it can happen ......but it will pass..
    Hang in there..

    I would suggest that you just post on one thread on here
    It gets to confusing..
    Talk to u later
    Iluv2
    Last edited by Anonymous; 12-25-2014 at 01:59 AM.
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  3. #3
    Trout908 is offline Member
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    Thank you. I do know Paws and do feel that is what I experienced..
    I am willing to go through this again but I guess I would like to actually find some people who quit opiates and are happy.
    I do appreciate you taking your time to post on my thread. I am new here and trying to figure out this forum.
    I am mildly depressed now bc my tolerance is too high, however I believe my body and soul have changed somehow. I have always been a happy person. Now I struggle for purpose and happiness, even though from the outside looking in everything is perfect. I guess I just would like to hear people quit and after the weeks to months it takes to reset your brain chemistry; are they happy? Changed? Feel normal?
    ( whatever that is
    Thanks

  4. #4
    Efil Pleh is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stephcrazy View Post
    Thank you. I do know Paws and do feel that is what I experienced..
    I am willing to go through this again but I guess I would like to actually find some people who quit opiates and are happy.
    I do appreciate you taking your time to post on my thread. I am new here and trying to figure out this forum.
    I am mildly depressed now bc my tolerance is too high, however I believe my body and soul have changed somehow. I have always been a happy person. Now I struggle for purpose and happiness, even though from the outside looking in everything is perfect. I guess I just would like to hear people quit and after the weeks to months it takes to reset your brain chemistry; are they happy? Changed? Feel normal?
    ( whatever that is
    Thanks
    I am Happy

    I believe it takes 90 days to regain normal happiness but it comes in small doses along the way and for the last week I have been happy more consistent, meaning about 70% of the time. One big step I think I took was refusing to keep driving myself down with self punishment regarding the past. Th either 30% is dealing with general life and that will improve in time. I am 49 days in and at 90 days or before I will be 100% and very happy!

    The truth and reality is people forget and or carry on and replace old memories with new and so should we. Who did we hurt the most? Ourselves! We have the rest of our lives to create new memories, good memories, ones we will choose to remember.

    Okay enough with that, you will want to hear that kind of stuff once you are through the withdrawals.

    To answer your question, HeadOn >

    YES I am happy, really am!

    I searched for success stories and searched and search prior to quitting and found little. What I realized is once people kick this they move on and do not post, they are so busy and so happy they chose to live, forget and move on, you will too.

    People in general would rather read about someone burning the house down than planting flowers in front of it so searching for the answers I know you want to here are hard to find but do exist and are plenty full. Believe me I thought (while taking the pills) I would never be normal and never be happy but I am!

    I hope this help and totally get what you are looking for, and once again YES happiness will return. I am proof.

    Sincerely,
    E.

  5. #5
    Trout908 is offline Member
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    Hi E,
    Thank you for your time. It does help to hear there is a reason to quit. I know internally this is what I need to do. I guess I am scared to go through it all just to realize I was better off taking pills. Did anyone notice that they changed? My family all thinks I am clean so obviously on the outside everything is great. However I do wander if the opiates have changed my personality and outlook..for example depression, I have never been depressed or without purpose; Or am I just getting older? 37 this month
    Thanks

  6. #6
    Trout908 is offline Member
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    Sorry wanted to explain... Anxiety depression, little motivation..when once I woke up at 6 am hit gym for a few hours and worked all day with great energy.

  7. #7
    Trout908 is offline Member
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    Anyway to merge threads?

  8. #8
    Trout908 is offline Member
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    E
    I read your story and others. I learned of the false reality we have. I also own several businesses that are all ok. Not great but ok. I feel that the pills are effecting my abilities I had years ago.
    I also seem normal but I wander, do you believe one can do better without the pills? Sorry for all the posts. I can't afford to mess this up. I have to be confident I can quit. I can't put my family through another detox.

  9. #9
    LifeSaver77 is offline Member
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    Gosh, the depression thing is such a roller coaster with opiates.

    In the beginning of me using, they totally abated my depression and gave me genuine euphoria.

    Now, after so many years of being on them (5), they do nothing BUT make me >>>>>y, depressed, and unmotivated. I know I'll NEVER get back the initial happy feelings they gave me.

    But, the longer we feed our brains with artificial "happy drugs", the less the body will produce them on its own.

    I'm in the middle of a taper right now, and one thing I am SO hopeful for, is that my depression goes away once I'm squeaky clean. I know the opiates aren't helping things.

    For you, your husband needs to really understand how he can support you better. Sounds like he's not as patient as your WD may require...

  10. #10
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    Hi there Steph
    I guess what I forgot to say!
    I was clean for 10 years until a car accident ..
    It was the best 10 years of my life!
    I was free..
    But it didn't just happen ..
    I had to change my way of thinking..
    I couldn't just sit around and wait till happiness found me..
    I started helping others , I became a RN..
    I found purpose and I did the best I could as often as I could ..
    Within 3 months 90 days my brain started producing endorphins again..
    Little things made me happy ..

    This time I am changing my thinking and behaviors again.
    That's what worked the last time I got clean..
    After years on opiates it really does take a tole on your brain..
    I would give it a at least 6 months..
    We don't get sick over night..
    Give yourself a break..
    You can always go back..
    The same routine and misery will be there..
    Using is very predictable..
    It never really changes ..
    At least when we are clean anything can happen!
    That includes anything amazing..
    I ended up with a life better than I ever imagined..
    The choice is yours..
    But it takes work..
    Iluv2
    Last edited by Anonymous; 12-26-2014 at 11:54 PM.

  11. #11
    FreedomFinally is offline New Member
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    Hello
    I am on day 3 of quitting oxy. It was the worsening depression, anxiety and depersonalization that made me quit this time. I do not recognize myself anymore and have a hard time finding my real identity anymore. This is very scary. I Had relapsed for the second time for about two months until a few days ago when I hit rock bottom sort of. I realized I wasn't getting high and the lows got increasingly worse and now this time the WDs are definitely worse.

    People saying that there is happiness after opiates here....well it is really motivating to read and really helps in these tough times. I just wanted to say I feel the same and you're not alone.

    I haven't told anyone about my problem and I'm managing the worst symptoms with lots of loperamide (Imodium) - it's an opiate that doesn't cross the blood brain barrier so you don't get high, but the body thinks you do? It's relieved 9/10 of the symptoms honestly. The acute WD's are easy compared to the crippling depression I'll have to face though, which scares me the most. I have a history of depression (self-medicated with oxy) and experiencing PAWS on too of that, well....trying hard to stay motivated and strong.

    Good luck

  12. #12
    Burqu3na505 is offline New Member
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    Yes there is... I am currently on suboxone that has given en me life again. Always remember, mind over matter (at times)

  13. #13
    isitoveryet is offline New Member
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    wow, Stephcrazy -- i just read your two posts and you have taken the words right out of my mouth. today is day 7 for me of withdrawal. 4/8 of 10/350's per day for past 2 years. Everyone/anyone who interacted with me, prior than past 7 days, would swear I was one of the happiest, confident, hopeful people they knew. That's what I made them think but on the inside I've been an empty shell. i'm scared about the future -- tomorrow, next week, next year -- don't know what normal is. I want to be happy but what if i'm going through all of this and i'm still empty inside. i try not to think too much of that but to read your posts, my God, I thought it was me that had written it. fingers crossed we both make it.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 12-31-2014 at 08:58 PM.
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  14. #14
    Trout908 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by isitoveryet View Post
    wow, Stephcrazy -- i just read your two posts and you have taken the words right out of my mouth. today is day 7 for me of withdrawal. 4/8 of 10/350's per day for past 2 years. Everyone/anyone who interacted with me, prior than past 7 days, would swear I was one of the happiest, confident, hopeful people they knew. That's what I made them think but on the inside I've been an empty shell. i'm scared about the future -- tomorrow, next week, next year -- don't know what normal is. I want to be happy but what if i'm going through all of this and i'm still empty inside. i try not to think too much of that but to read your posts, my God, I thought it was me that had written it. fingers crossed we both make it.
    I am on day 10.,, I have not had the intense horrible last forever depression. I have been very diligent on taking my supplements, trying to exercise, and learn how to live again . I still have decreased energy and I'm not "happy" but I'm not a crying wreck.,
    Take the nutrient td everyone!! Anyone else around day 10?

  15. #15
    Questions11 is offline Member
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    Steph,

    You are not alone, as everyone else has already said. There are people in this thread that have responded and helped with mine.

    Today is my first day not using after a little over a year.

    I didn't share this in my other post, but I used to use (not as much as I do now) and stopped for almost a year and I was so happy, full of life and never looked back. You will be happy, and that is what is helping me now. I've been ready to stop but have been scared of WD, but everyone on here is so helpful.

    I just wanted to let you know I'll be going through this with you and isitoveryet and freedomfinally, and whoever is quitting now too!

    Everyone will be happy, there is no doubt in my mind. Just stay positive.. And I'll be taking my own advice too from the help of everyone here.

    C

  16. #16
    HarrySmooth is offline Advanced Member
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    Hey Steph,
    I just wanted to say that there is ABSOLUTE Happiness after an addition!! For ahile I thought my entire world was coming to an End....I lost my Wife over this addiction, my Son went into the Coast Guard, and my addiction was running my business of over a Decade into the ground! And to top it ALL, I was going thru all of this ALONE! Just myself and my lil Dog "Schneider"....But about the time I thou tn all was hopelsss, all of a sudden it was like a "LightBulb" POPPED on, and everything was A-OK! Now, a few months later I feel just AWESOME! All of the Things I used to Love have returned!

    Trust me, we didnt get addicted over night and we certainly..wont "Shake it" overnight either! But with Perseverance.Family, Friends and most important, Intestinal Fortitude, we WILL Make it!!! But ya GOTTA want it! And ya gotta want it more tha ANYTHING you have EVER WANTED IN YOUR life!!!!! bUT IF YOU DIDN'T, YOU WOULDN'T BE HERE.....so Hang i there, you WILL do this!!!!
    We are ALL here for you, and will do anything to help you!@
    You have but to ask, and youve alreay taken that 1st step! Hang in there kiddo! We WILL make it....TOGETHER!!!!!''
    If there is ANYTHING I can do to help, just ask! if you feel you need someone to talk to Privately just check my Profile and drop me a line!!!!
    We,re all here to help!!!!
    Your Pal Harry

  17. #17
    Trout908 is offline Member
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    Years ago I was a fitness freak... I am trying to slowly get this back.. Hobbies, so hard in the first few weeks...
    Today is day 12 and was hard!! My husband upset me first thing by saying we are not going anywhere bc of my Unhappiness staying home. He doesn't understand why I am not happy with him and kids. It broke my heart. I had something to look forward to and now it's like ok now what. First day I have badly wanted an anti depressant. I can't let myself fall into this depressive trap . Hopefully tomorrow I can wake up and be motivated to work.

  18. #18
    kmarshall89 is offline New Member
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    This is a very good question. I'm trying to do some research on attempting to kick opiate addiction, because I'll begin out patient rehab very soon and I'm a bit worried. I've been taking opiates now for, on and off, roughly 12 years. The bad thing about that is, I'm only 25, (will be 26 in 2 weeks). I didn't become addicted to the pain killers until 2008. That is when I began taking them regularly as possible. Yes, I was prescribed the pills. And, I still am being prescribed hydrocodone 10/325mg 1 tab by mouth 4x daily, alprazolam 1mg 3x daily or every 8hrs as needed, phenergan 25mg every 8hrs as needed for nausea, and phentermine 37.5 mg once daily. Now of course there had got to be good reasoning for the doctor to keep me on these things like that for so long. I've suffered from severe problems with my knees my whole life, and when I was only 13, I flipped a four-wheeler on top of me and managed to shatter my left shoulder. That's when they started giving me pain pills. But since 2008, my knees problems have progressed immensely!! In October of 2010 I had surgery for a torn meniscus and the Dr also found what he described as a rough spot on my patella, (knee cap) that he has no choice but to sand down to the bone to smooth it out. That was supposed to fix all the probs with my knee (dislocating, grinding, clicking, fluid built up over my patella, muscular atrophy, severe pain at all times,). It didn't!! In 2012, I was at work and dislocated my knee and apparently it was bad enough to tear my meniscus again. When the Dr told me that I was going to need to have the same surgery again, less than 2yrs later, I was pretty adiment on not going thru that again when it never worked the first time. Well, here lately my knee is dislocating every other day. Where the most it had ever done it before was 2 times throughout a 6 month time span. So, I went back to the Dr and he blessed me or and told me I've most likely severed the meniscus completely. Most likely, I've probably done very extensive damage to my knee. Now I've got no other opp option other than to go thru with the surgery and hope and pray it'll work, or at least lessen the pain. But now I've got to kick this addiction!!! So if there's anyone that can help me with what I can expect that would be amazing and very much appreciated!!!! Wish me luck!?!?!?!?!?!?!

  19. #19
    Trout908 is offline Member
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    Hi and welcome! Check out my journey here.. https://www.drugs.com/forum/need-tal...tml#post454836
    Started two threads not knowing better .. I'm pretty sure if you have any questions on detox CT.. I can give you my "opinion" or support.

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