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Trying this again..
  1. #31
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    Thanks sunshine. I'm just going one minute at a time now. I started taking this stuff for a serious problem. Going off is going to show me what my actual pain level is an probably make me get the surgery I need. Each year I put this surgery off the more complicated it becomes. Now they will need to do two surgeries. If I wait longer it could be three or become inoperable which would likely mean I would be semi paralyzed. The surgery won't stop my pain but it will prevent potential paralysis and stop the pain from getting worse. Don't know what I will do about paint mgmt but I'm not going this route again.

  2. #32
    Questions11 is offline Member
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    Hi sunshine thanks for checking in! Im feeling so so much better today, but I'm not going to sit here and think it's over. But definitely better. I'll keep you updated!

    Marva, I hope the mmt isn't necessary because I think you'll end up in this place again, but for the methadone next time. Could be wrong, but I don't want to see you jump to that after you would have already came this far! See if there is something else you can do for the pain you have!

  3. #33
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    After doing this. I really think methadone is overkill for a pill addiction. Don't get me wrong, this sucks but coming off methadone, which is stronger, will be worse. Heard it is good for pain but I think it really messes your body up

  4. #34
    Questions11 is offline Member
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    Yes I totally agree! I've heard the same for suboxone too.. And I know some people need it and it helps and works but we've already came this far and it will end it won't be forever that is what I tell myself

  5. #35
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    How old are you? I'm an old lady lol 46. Do u have cravings? Last time I did but this time none. None at all. Also realized I only smoked when I took pills. No smoking since I fid this and no cravings! Tomorrow I work so let's see how that goes was gonna take off as I work for myself but being alone, doing nothing, cravings will come in sure. You are doing awesome! So proud of you.

  6. #36
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    Hi there.
    Sorry it has taken so long to get back to you..
    I have been working. Long hours .
    But off now for 4 days..

    I was on MMT for 10+ years..
    Randy will agree it is the worst drug on the planet..

    It took me to my knees..
    Talk about numb...

    For some it is the best I guess..
    Harm reduction..

    But it can be and is abused.
    It is a full opiate agonist..
    I got high from it..
    I tried so many times to get off it...
    I could do it with Suboxone..
    I am 58 so I did not want to be 60 pn methadone...

    After sub and methadone there is no where left to go but the streets..

    It is as extreme as a person can get with opiate use..

    Even having surgery can become an issue because it drives your tolerance so high ...

    I would think long and hard about that as an option....
    You can do this..

    You both are doing it ..
    You are almost there...

    I am tapering sub now successfully could never taper anything else..
    Cuz there always be one next day...

    It may help with cravings while on it but what happens after you get off of it?
    Hopefully you want your brain to return to normal..
    That will include cravings..

    They are feelings ..
    They pass..
    They do get weaker the longer we are clean..
    When you get one just recognize for what it is..
    A feeling to do something..
    God knows we don't do everything we think about doing..
    Just let it pass..
    Play the whole scenario out if you take just one pill ..
    What will happen?
    I have to go if u decide to go on MMT I will support you in your endeavor to recover..

    But please do some research from someone other than the MMT clinic..
    It is like a cash cow..
    They make millions off the pain off struggling addicts..

    Sorry to be so harsh..
    But that it probaly one of the few things in life I am not budging on...
    Been there, done that!
    Take care
    Bette
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-25-2015 at 11:18 AM.

  7. #37
    Questions11 is offline Member
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    Im 24! I have definitely thought about it.. Had some cravings but not like last time. I think its because I am so done and so ready to be done. And I work tomorrow too, so we'll be able to be in touch. Last time I tried to stop (a few weeks ago) I took a day off and it was worse then actually being in work. So I think this weekend helped being off and maybe I can deal with tomorrow and you can too

  8. #38
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    Thanks liuv. I did s ton of research on mmt. I went to one clinc and counsellors were great and I thought it was viable. Doc was out so I drive to another clinic and it scared me to death. I'm 46 and saw people in their 70s going in. The clinc was nasty and stunk. I turned around and ran out and someone out there followed me to my truck trying to get me back in. Went back to the nice clinic the next day and doc was out. Went home and started kicking. They called Friday with doc out and told me to take pills over the weekend and come in Monday. I didn't take anything and I'm not going in. My family lives to get up and go camping for the weekend and that wouldn't happen. I need to go out of town for my business and that would stop and i would lose clients. I've been lurking here for years and reading what yall go through with mmt. They swore it would not make me high but my friends sounds like she is on h after she comes home. Made it three days now I need to get back into to reality tomorrow. Thinking about driving a hour and hitting an NA meeting. Hubs is against it. He's been opiate free 19 years and says even 2 years later meetings made him want to use. He did mmt three times 24 years ago and thought it would be good for me but now he doesn't and says I did great. Thank u for your advise on mmt. Everything positive is written by clinics. I suppose it saves lives but I don't think taking something stronget makes sense

  9. #39
    Questions11 is offline Member
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    Marva, just thinking cause I realized my stomach hasn't been as bad at it usually is when I try and stop..can you have your husband run out and get you Imodium? The liquid kind is what I got and took it yesterday after I went the bathroom once and was worried it would get worse and the stomach pain would start and haven't had that symptom since! Just a thought.. Hope you're hanging in there.

  10. #40
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    I'm waiting on Imodium. Honestly I havrntt been regular in years so I'm going to wait a while lol tmi probably. Everyone o couldn't reach in the last few weeks are calling and in not tempted to pick up. Didn't think they would cause I cussed them all out via text and I was nasty. Going to sit in my tree stand and enjoy the sun

  11. #41
    Questions11 is offline Member
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    Hahah don't worry about it at all! Just trying to give you suggestions, I really do think its helping me and is an option! Im glad you told them off, but they aren't your friends they just want your money! Glad you don't care to talk to them. I haven't gotten any texts or phone calls and am
    Surprised, but happy I haven't dealt with it yet. I deleted numbers Friday!

  12. #42
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    Down swing in bed this sux

  13. #43
    Questions11 is offline Member
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    At least you were able to write something. I got out again today, helped keep my mind off it most of the time. If I felt better today you have to tomorrow or the next day. Im not saying im 100% but totally doable hang in there

  14. #44
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    I felt good for hours then wham. I have to figure a way into the bedroom (read other post ugh) and I feel like xxxxx. Dtr needs to go to store and I just cannot move. Hours ago o was fine. This too shall pass

  15. #45
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    Questions. Praying u feel as good as I do today. Let me know. I realize I will probably hurt again later but that's okay. Thankful for feeling normal for seven hours straight

  16. #46
    rainbowpoots is offline Member
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    Hey everyone! As of now I'm not feeling so bad either ( right now) did ten jumping Jax just to get some blood pumping and endorphins moving along... unlike you I haven't hardly been out of bed since Friday evening. Im hopeful I stay feeling good. Slight headaches but im okay :-) minimal leg cramps... minimal sweats. We have this. So close to being out of the pain woods!

  17. #47
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    Congrats rainbow I found the more I moved the quicker it passed. Just don't overdo it because it sneaks back up on you and when it does just go back to bed

  18. #48
    rainbowpoots is offline Member
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    I remember last time day 4 I was at the park. Its very cold here..so that's out of the question but maybe a trip to the mcds to let my kiddo play inside! My heads saying yes yes yes get goin but im still lethargic. But I'm not in terrible pain

  19. #49
    Questions11 is offline Member
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    Hi ladies! I am also feeling great compared to past days, im so happy you're both feeling better! I worked today, and not gonna lie it was a little bit of a slow start, but drank tons of water and once I ate my lunch I felt better. Surprising because I figured at the end of the day I would be the most tired and sore but it's the opposite. I truly think the amount of water I've been drinking is doing wonders for me.

    Marva, 7 hours feeling good is a far way from a couple days ago when it was like 30 minute bursts!

  20. #50
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    bad downswing at nine hours. Shooting for 12 good hours tomorrow. Also think that jacuzzi I never used is working wonders. If I could just go in once without getting my hair caught in the jets

  21. #51
    Questions11 is offline Member
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    Hahah at least you have the jacuzzi! I have to go with the hot showers and heating pad... But we have to make due with what we have right? Haha and its moving richt along

  22. #52
    rainbowpoots is offline Member
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    Glad you guys are doing good! I started feeling myself get better around noon. Im still okay...well decent. Starting to feel achy in the legs but other then that im feeling okay. I wish our hot tub worked... well not mine my mother's lol. I'm trying to get ny hands on some klonopin maybe catch some sleep later. My brother takes them so hopefully he could give me one i could forth dor the next few evenings. That used to help me immensely when i couldn't sleep from night terrors. A hot shower is in my future for sure heres to praying I'm over the hump! That were all over the worst and nothing but metal healing in our future and finding our real selves again... weve all made it so far! Im so proud of everyone! Proud of myself for not giving in.

  23. #53
    Questions11 is offline Member
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    Hi Marva, how are you doing? I'm feeling good again today! The past three days I've consistently felt the same I think. A little bit tired, kind of sluggish, but nothing that is killing me. I felt like the RLS might have been kicking in again last night (same as the night before) but I took my Hylands again and slept through the night.. (with the help of NyQuil one last time, I don't want to take it again tonight and see if I get the same sleep without it). Let me know how you are feeling!

    Rainbow, now how are you! I'm glad you started feeling better yesterday you are making progress! It will get a little better each day, trust us! Just stay positive and busy if you can, and know that hopefully today when you got up you feel better then yesterday.. and tomorrow will be better than today. It's a work in progress but we're absolutely 100% doing it.

    Check in soon!!

  24. #54
    rainbowpoots is offline Member
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    Hello questions & marva. I slept ok last night better then the night before... with the h3lp of 2mg of valium. I feel better today... very sluggish and not wanting to do anything but sleep, but I'm going to shower soon And atleast get out to the store for a few items... if its in me I'll take the kiddo to play somewhere inside other than this house. Glad to hear your doing well. I haven't had cravings really but alot of anxiety.

  25. #55
    Sunshine1112 is offline Advanced Member
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    Rainbow, question, and Marva the three of you are doing great. Keep up the good fight!!! I am glad it's getting easier. You are all doing it and will now start counting the days a little easier, soon to count the weeks!!

  26. #56
    rainbowpoots is offline Member
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    Thank you sunshine! Im forcing myself to get out into the world today with my baby. The sun is and out which i havent seen it in days... so today is better then nothing! Im very very unmotivated but I have to try and get uo and out of this place!!

  27. #57
    Sunshine1112 is offline Advanced Member
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    Rainbow the lack of motivation can be a fight all in itself, the sun always helps and having young children actually helps as you don't have a choice. Once you get moving around it is always easier it's getting that initial push. Until I actually get up and take the dog for a walk I don't like doing much.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-27-2015 at 12:03 PM. Reason: Typo

  28. #58
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    Day five and wd seems to be gone. Had one downswing yesterday but woke up normal. Bad thing is I'm limping again and my original pain is back full force. Gotta slow down. With my meds I could move around. Without them I'm good for about 100 feet. Moved my surgeons appt up. Docs were right I'm getting worse and need surgery. I'm taking Advil and tyelonol and gabapentin. No more Xanax tonight either. I'm switching to Benadryl. I do appreciate what the meds did for me but I need to feel this pain to go through the surgeries maybe I'll have less pain after the fix me up. Glad everyone is doing well! I was happy to get back to work even though I work from home lol.

  29. #59
    rainbowpoots is offline Member
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    Good to hear marva! So glad your wd are gone. I believe I kicked the worst of mine

  30. #60
    Marvathree is offline Junior Member
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    Day six they are creeping back but not bad. Likely just anxiety

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