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trying to get my life back free from prescription pain day 1
  1. #91
    Helena77 is offline Banned
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    There's a sauna at the gym we go to. But during the day, as it's been hot outside, I blast my heat in the car and roll up the windows and get a similar effect. Just drink plenty of water or chew ice chips while you do it. Hot showers are awesome. I just stand there sometimes until the hot water runs out! I

  2. #92
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Hehe. Good to hear. Yum on the ice pieces! That's something i do. Btw... no posts from wantmylifeback, wonder how she is doing. Hopefully she didn't give in.

  3. #93
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Well good night. Another day. Not bad at all. No body symptoms. Only issue is mental. Every once in a while my heart skips a beast when i remember the good feeling and energy it gave me and immediately remember I'll never get it again. This is common at this stage, eventually you stop caring for that feeling once you get naturally happy again. Good night.

  4. #94
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    118 hours clean. Good morning. Slept good with no aid. Having a easier time adjusting than i expected. Loperamide helped on the worst 3 days i suspect. No body symptoms . Vivid dreaming.just have some slight cravings for the good buzz from it. Let's see how it goes today. Still waiting patiently for a natural endorphins production. Yesterday afternoon i think i got a slight feel of it. I was very contempt but not happy. Maybe it's a sign for today?

  5. #95
    jeffro6527 is offline Member
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    congratulations crazyfrog!

    118 hours is awesome!

    The mental aspect will continue to get better as well, it just takes a bit longer. Stay on this path and before you know it you will feel true joy and happiness again, but this time it will be REAL. You will also experience pain and sadness but again they will be REAL.

    If you want to help your endorphin levels out get as much exercise as possible now. Anything that gets your blood pumping or muscles firing will give you some good endorphin release. Even a brisk paced walk helps (if you aren't accustomed to doing a lot of exercise yet).

    Lastly, as far as the mental aspect goes, I suggest a 12 step program. Sitting in a few meetings may give you real hope and support and you need both those things now as you enter this new stage of recovery.

    Stick with it!
    Your pal,
    Jeffro

  6. #96
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Thxs Jeffro. Kind words my brother. Yeah I'm glad this is finally the real one. Happy to finally jump off . Scary at first but like expected, its getting better. Slowly. .. but progress is real.

  7. #97
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    132 hours. Hope helena and wantmylifeback are doing good. Don't let go! If i could hold on this long, you souks be able to do it aswell. Trust me on that, pills are my weakness. Anyways. ..good nighy.

  8. #98
    Helena77 is offline Banned
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    I haven't had a pill in over 2yrs. So far so good. Will be 48hrs when I wake up. Stomach sort of hurts a little, but that's really it. Drank an entire bottle of immodium today!! Have absolutely no cravings at all. Just not an option in my mind!

    Congratulations!! No turning back now, you're pretty much through this. Hang in there!! You're probably giving so many others, including myself, much needed drive, determination and inspiration. Keep posting so others know that this is totally doable!!! xoxoxo

  9. #99
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by crazyfrog View Post
    Happy birthday btw! Cheers on your life! That's some good insight in your life. Splitting up due to drug use is very common! That on itself should give you will to stop. This is a common side effect from pills. For tend to enjoy the pills more than your relationship. And when there's problems, taking a few pills nautralizes the mental stress leaving you worth the issues lingering in the background. Eventually it catches up and you loose everything. Im my case ,my marriage has suffered aswell. I have not been a good husband but i have been a great father. Don't know how I'm still married so I'm guessing the wife has a lot of patience! One of the stages you go through is apathy, it makes you kick yourself when you see all the problems you caused inside the family. I managed to control the marriage problems by isolating myself away from everything so I'm alone and not fighting. Lonely marriage really. I just have priority towards my partner in all events and maintained everything so she has her life in good standing. Paying bills and maintaining the cars so she had a somewhat stable day to day living. I was never like this, always been caring and happy. Opiates dull the personality and it makes you into a self isolated moody person. Not much stability. You 2 girls though, are still young. In your early 30s. So look at it this way, is better to wake up not than layer as a old human! It's not to late to rebuild. Also once you girls get totally clean, you will see a transformation in your looks. You turn beautiful again. No more tired eyes. No more slight dark eye circles. You gain a little weight and look healthy. You never know. ... even find a nice guy to get that new relationship feeling. Yep... its doable. Just have to do it now before the cycle starts again and do this for another decade.
    Not my drug use, his drug use. He was using meth and coke. Like I said he's been clean a few years he's now my best friend and he's a recovery support specialist, he also has chronic pain from several terrible accidents he was in. He is on pain meds still but he has not abused them in over 4 years. He said that he's not sure how I'm doing this lol he knows what it's like to detox from heavy meds he can't believe how well I am doing. I told him to Google the Thomas recipe maybe it will be of help to some of his clients Idk. The past two days have been very hard not to give in I'll be honest because I was dealing with crisis with my 18 year old son and in past when I have been this upset that is what I turned to an extra few pills, I have no normal coping skills anymore I guess. I have to learn them all over again. I had my friend help set up an intake where he works so that I can learn coping skills again and not relapse

  10. #100
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    I'm SO sorry I have not posted like I said in my other comment I was dealing with crisis from the evening of my birthday to late last night with my 18 year old son his pos girlfriend lied to cops and had him put in a mental hospital for 24 hours all because she was mad that he left her. This chick is my age and my son is only 18 I hate her so much especially now, my son was not suicidal even the police and the drs said that he's not but apparently in az if someone calls cops and says that, they have to take you for a 24 hour observation no matter what. Ugh. I have not slipped but it was very very hard not to. For years the pills have not just been for my physical pain but my emotional pain, my coping mechanism. Its been a hard 2 days.

  11. #101
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    Sorry I am just catching up so u will have a ton of responces from me lol. I couldn't taper for the same reason I know that I would have took whatever to make me not feel sick so I figured I'd be better off to take none instead of try to taper and be sick longer

  12. #102
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by crazyfrog View Post
    Hehe. Good to hear. Yum on the ice pieces! That's something i do. Btw... no posts from wantmylifeback, wonder how she is doing. Hopefully she didn't give in.
    No I didn't give in. Worked all day the 5th, posted to u guys that morning before work, on my way home from work I got the call about my son and I was at crisis center until last night when I got home with him. See other posts for what I'm talking about

  13. #103
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by Helena77 View Post
    I haven't had a pill in over 2yrs. So far so good. Will be 48hrs when I wake up. Stomach sort of hurts a little, but that's really it. Drank an entire bottle of immodium today!! Have absolutely no cravings at all. Just not an option in my mind!

    Congratulations!! No turning back now, you're pretty much through this. Hang in there!! You're probably giving so many others, including myself, much needed drive, determination and inspiration. Keep posting so others know that this is totally doable!!! xoxoxo
    Alright! 48 is a good start. Yup, imodium works for the cravings too. Don't fall, 48hours is still little and can catch you off guard of you ate not determined.

  14. #104
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantmylifeback5409 View Post
    No I didn't give in. Worked all day the 5th, posted to u guys that morning before work, on my way home from work I got the call about my son and I was at crisis center until last night when I got home with him. See other posts for what I'm talking about
    Ahh there you are! I fully understand. Not god to have these family issues when you are detoxing! Makes you want to pop some. I'm glad you held your ground! Hopefully you and your son sort this out soon. And yes.... its been a mental battle since yesterday for me aswell. I swear mentally i broke down again. No one around me knows it, i keep putting a fake smile. The craving were strong. If i did have a rx, i would have taken it. But that's not the case luckily i guess. Cravings are atrong again this morning, they seem stronger. Getting emotinal again but like we all know. These are those nasty waves of discomfort . Hopefully the day my mind treats me better. No physical symptoms as well, all mental.

    P.s. wantmylifeback . ... you don't need to post everyday. Not expecting that. We all have our lives to take care off . Log in when you see fit. I'm probably going to stop postingas much myself. Usually after day 10 something happens and endorphins start fluttering a bit. That's when i just start living life again and put all this behind. 145 hours clean.

  15. #105
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    Yes I know that I don't have to post every day but I saw that you were concerned/hoping that I hadn't given in so I wanted to let you know also talking with you guys really helps me. Yes if I would have been at home instead of sitting at the crisis center I may have given in because I truly wanted to but by the time I got home all I wanted was an anxiety med and sleep and I didn't care about the pain meds anymore after 22 hours of hell. And thank you, my son is ok, like I said in my other post there's nothing wrong with him at all his girlfriend did this to him because she was mad so she thought it would be great revenge to tell the police he was suicidal and have him committed, she is nuts, seriously she is bipolar and schizophrenic she has been off her meds AND she is 31 only 2 years younger than me my son is only 18, she is a sick individual. I only found out yesterday that they have had a relationship since he was 15!! I'm sick over that it's disgusting! And illegal. I really hate that woman and I hope this was a wake up call to my son to stay away from her now.

  16. #106
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Yup.. he needs to dump her. Anyone around anyone who is doing these meds can cause alot of problems. Pretty crazy what she is doing. Well.... add another free hours to this count. You should start feeling some what ok soon. I'm better as more hours pass by. Cravings for that nice warn feeling but I'm on the road to natural endorphins. Hopefully they kick in soon. Back is hurting bad but going to just sukk it up.

  17. #107
    Helena77 is offline Banned
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    I'm at 11hrs after my jump. Headed to gym! Worked all day, have a big job tomorrow, soccer games early Saturday and sweat room later that day. Hopefully I'll feel cleansed for mothers day. Yikes!!

  18. #108
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by Helena77 View Post
    I'm at 11hrs after my jump. Headed to gym! Worked all day, have a big job tomorrow, soccer games early Saturday and sweat room later that day. Hopefully I'll feel cleansed for mothers day. Yikes!!
    lol! Yikes is right! Keep adding hours. Soon you will have many.

  19. #109
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by crazyfrog View Post
    pandora, never heard of them. I do like iron maiden. I think pandora is similar. But my favorites are 80s music! Love love love them.
    Pandora is not a band it's an app on the phone that plays whatever you like, you can ad stations of whatever bands you like for free, you can also download Pandora on the computer it's free if you don't mind commercial once in a while, nothing near as often as the actual radio. You should check it out. It has EVERYTHING, old music, New music and everything in between

  20. #110
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    I meant that his girlfriend is off her phyc meds, which is NOT a good thing, she needs to stay on those because she is bipolar and schizophrenic, I do hope that he stays away from her after all that

  21. #111
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Hi there. Ok i misunderstood. Hopefully it wall works out. How you holding up? ? Still adding hours? I got 171 hours into it. No body symptoms. Didn't even get diarreah. I think talking loperamide for the 2nd 3rd and 4th initial days really helped me through with the worst parts ! My mood is stable. Not emotional at all. Not taking anything but eating regularly .not even healthy. Just eating normal. Staying busy helps alot. I do have slight craving today but better than the last 2 days. I can feel a very slight endorphin production. Nothing to brag about, but its better than nothing. Anyways. . Just dropping by.

  22. #112
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Helena, what about you? Doing good?

  23. #113
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    190 hours clean. How you two holding up?

    8 days into it and mentally not there yet. I have more motivation though. I can go to stores and all.

  24. #114
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    214 hours. Almost done with the 9th day. This is the stage of transition. I noticed that once you hit day 10, you actually begin feeling a lot better. Your switch personality due to the chemistry being more level. Yesterday i had a rather good day, very busy and didn't think of dosages. I was in a good place mentally. Tbis morning as soon as i woke up, i thought of the pills and didn't care. Hehe . ... i might be over the hill i think.

    Any good news on you girls?
    Helene78 likes this.

  25. #115
    SweetBecky is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by crazyfrog View Post
    214 hours. Almost done with the 9th day. This is the stage of transition. I noticed that once you hit day 10, you actually begin feeling a lot better. Your switch personality due to the chemistry being more level. Yesterday i had a rather good day, very busy and didn't think of dosages. I was in a good place mentally. Tbis morning as soon as i woke up, i thought of the pills and didn't care. Hehe . ... i might be over the hill i think.


    Any good news on you girls?
    I think Helena got banned, whatever that means, but from what I've read in some of the other threads, it means she cannot post or anything. But I was following her story and literally jumped when she did! It was weird, I felt like I was reading my own. I really hope she comes back bc I'd like to hear more. I'm over 72hrs now and I feel fine. I took my kids out to the country last night and while they swam and played with animals on my friends land, me and the other moms took a mile hike into the woods and sweat our butts off and let go of all of the negatives things we had weighing us down and each talked about what we wanted to do better and improve upon and committed to supporting each other in the future. I'm not feeling any symptoms at all. I felt icky when I woke up this morning, however, last night wore me out! Even though I've been exercising and takimg supplements like crazy, I haven't been on a hike like that in years!! It wasn't a flat trail either, it was full of rocks and hills and had to cross a creek! It was amazing being one with nature like that and my endorphins are in full force!! Taking kids to pool today. Once I took my vitamins this morning, I felt great!!! Hope it stays this way. I was expecting much worse!! I'm actually really hungry and I don't typically eat much at all. Hope you guys are hanging in there!!!
    Last edited by Anonymous; 05-10-2015 at 10:22 AM.

  26. #116
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by SweetBecky View Post
    I think Helena got banned, whatever that means, but from what I've read in some of the other threads, it means she cannot post or anything. But I was following her story and literally jumped when she did! It was weird, I felt like I was reading my own. I really hope she comes back bc I'd like to hear more. I'm over 72hrs now and I feel fine. I took my kids out to the country last night and while they swam and played with animals on my friends land, me and the other moms took a mile hike into the woods and sweat our butts off and let go of all of the negatives things we had weighing us down and each talked about what we wanted to do better and improve upon and committed to supporting each other in the future. I'm not feeling any symptoms at all. I felt icky when I woke up this morning, however, last night wore me out! Even though I've been exercising and takimg supplements like crazy, I haven't been on a hike like that in years!! It wasn't a flat trail either, it was full of rocks and hills and had to cross a creek! It was amazing being one with nature like that and my endorphins are in full force!! Taking kids to pool today. Once I took my vitamins this morning, I felt great!!! Hope it stays this way. I was expecting much worse!! I'm actually really hungry and I don't typically eat much at all. Hope you guys are hanging in there!!!
    Hi sweetbecky! Sad to hear she got the ban hammer. She was very polite and encouraging in this thread. Maybe she comes back as batman or something. Hehe. Thats awesome on the 72 hours! That's the peak for the worst physical symptoms. If you are doing good at this point, you will continue to progress nicely! What were you on and what dosages ? And for how long?

    I HAVE to agree with nature! Its one of the best activities you can do! Im in a big city and its about a1 hour drive to hit mountains . I did that 2 days ago but just drove through it. But just the mountains and environment was enough to gone me a nice happy feeling. And in honestly its been very easy body wise. I took loperamide on the first 4 daysvin which is the worst! It worked so well that I didn't experience body aches, night hit chills, sweats, fatigue or diahrrea. It was on the 5th day that i got slightly emotional with strong cravings . Lasted 2 days after that. Day 8 was way better. Now im 29 minutes into day 10. And doing a whole lot better. Very slight cravings but they don't bother me as much as the past. I'm enjoying this morning well. Taking nothing but water are regular food. No otc meds at all. Keep adding hours, 72 so far in already a good amount! Beware. .. you will get strong craving soon! Just distract yourself!

  27. #117
    SweetBecky is offline Banned
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    I did two sets of skip days after a 6mo taper on suboxone. I gave up pills several years ago. Wouldn't even know how to get them now, as my doc knows not to give them to me. I've abused subutex and soboxone during that time and after. I actually felt better the less I took and instantly better when I jumped. I use the immodium as well, but not very much. I take tyrosine too, but sometimes it gets too intense and I have to balance it out with theanine and valerian root. I think I did most of my w/d thru my taper. I feel more from the supplements than I've felt from anything else in a long time.

    Happy to hear you made it to day 10!! I wouldn't have been able to go CT like that. I swear by the taper plan for those who need to cushion their fall. I'm just happy to be done with this, find clean friends who can understand and encourage and support me and looking very forward to a new life!

  28. #118
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    Sorry, I taoered down from 3mg of suboxone, to 2 to 1, rather quickly and stayed at 1 for almost 6mos. Then over past few weeks, I got down around .06, did a skip day, then dosed, then jumped.

  29. #119
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Wow! That was a long taper! Good job. What ever works, continue. Taper for me is impossible. Either is all systems go or nothing. So i always go cold turkey. Well 224 hours. Soon I'll just count days rather than hours. I seem to be getting better mentally. The mental stress has subsided a small amount. I am producing endorphins, i can feel it in a very small steady amount. I'm still waiting for that magical day where i truly feel that good natural high. I haven't gotten it yet.

  30. #120
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Hey there! Good to hear from you sweetbecky. Yup, i think I'm done counting hours. Everytime i hit over 200hr it becomes pointless. I move towards days. Yeah, getting out and doing anything helps a lot! I ended up walkingbthe coast line for about a hours yesterday. It felt good afterwards. I havent heard from the original poster. Wantmylifeback , if you read this.... i how you are doing good and still holding on. If you lost grip, don't worry. You have unlimited opportunities in the future. Wish u well.

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