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trying to get my life back free from prescription pain day 1
  1. #1
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    Default trying to get my life back free from prescription pain day 1

    Hi everyone this is my first time posting. I have been wanting to get off my pain meds for a while and I have been reading these boards for some time for advice and encouragment. A little about me, at 25 I have multiple surgeries for endometriosis and massive problems and numerous hospitalizations from that finally resulting in a full hysterectomy. I got better dumped my pain meds (at that time I was only on Percocet 5mg 6 per day) ok no problem really sick for 2 days that's it. At 26 only a year later I started having some other physical problems the docs said were genetic (my mom is disabled) but brought on so young due to the hysterectomy, well at that time I still refused to go back on pain meds because it wasn't terrible pain yet, over the next year I was diagnosed with the genetic disorder called Marphans syndrome which caused severe muscle spasms, full blown osteoporosis and I was sent to multiple specialists who then found that I have several compressed disks and disks that slip which is why I had two ambulance rides a couple of months before when my back went out er gave me diladid in iv and hydromorphine to go home but very small amount, the spine Dr also found multiple other issues with my spine including a spinal fracture, and so on. My rheumatologist found that I have osteoarthritis and rheumatoid arthritis, within 4 months I'd lost my job because of missing work from the pain so I agreed to go back on pain meds at which time I refused to go on Percocet because the withdrawal was terrible when I decided to stop so I was at first prescribed 7.5/500 vicoden and within a couple months they also prescribed 2-15 mg morphine a day anyway long story short I was sent to pain management because my pain still wasn't under control, where I was increased to 3-30mg morphine er and 5- 10/325 Norco per day. That was almost 2 years ago, since I have been diagnosed with connective tissue disorder and lupus among less serious things, oh and I suffer chronic migraines for over 8 years. Anyway the last I'd say 15-16 months my meds stopped controlling my pain as much and eventually stopped helping at all at the prescribed dose, I lost several jobs, my business etc, I begin talking the amount that would help me work and care for my home family and animals, which was about 3 times what I was supposed to take, mind you I tried to do things right and talk to pain management drs for over a year, but they claim that your body doesn't build a tolerance haha my rear even my primary care who I used to be prescribed by said that you do and that's why he used to temporarily switch me every6 months to a different kind. Ok back on track so I found myself spending a lot of money just to be able to work, I hate who I've become and I fully believe that these are making my pain and severe fatigue so much worse than without them. So the last 6 weeks I've been reading these boards trying to find help because I absolutely can NOT go to my doctor, I've seen them report others who seek help. I'm on day 1 and I'm already feeling terrible, I really have no one to talk to about this because people I know d
    either don't understand the physical addition or they offer pills which is NOT what I want. I want off these meds except my muscle relaxers because they are the only way to keep these ridiculous spasms away that I have every day. I want very much to do the Thomas recipe however I don't have the money to purchase all that stuff. I just moved and it took everything. What I do have are muscle relaxers, off brand Imodium (same aactive ingredient that was posted) I have only 2 anxiety meds which I know isn't going to help me, and butabutiol for my migraines. I couldn't get anything else on the list nor do I even have Gatorade, 7up, bottled water etc. I did ask my mom to help me for a few days but unfortunately she can't and that's probably best because I know that she has meds I'd probably break down and beg for. I really hope this is a pretty anonymous place. Anyway does anyone have any advice for me, encouragement or anything? I know many are going to say that I really need the other things on Thomas recipe but I simply can't get them. I HAVE to do this it's gotten out of control the last couple of months. EVERYONE important in my life I'm sure is suffering even though they don't even really know what you is going on all most know is my legit physical problems and how it makes me so unable to be a normal 33 year old. I understand that I will never be healthy and who I was before, however I also understand that I'm making my situation much worse by taking these meds. Thank you all for any advice and support.

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    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantmylifeback5409 View Post
    Hi everyone this is my first time posting. I have been wanting to get off my pain meds for a while and I have been reading these boards for some time for advice and encouragment. A little about me, at 25 I have multiple surgeries for endometriosis and massive problems and numerous hospitalizations from that finally resulting in a full hysterectomy. I got better dumped my pain meds (at that time I was only on Percocet 5mg 6 per day) ok no problem really sick for 2 days that's it. At 26 only a year later I started having some other physical problems the docs said were genetic (my mom is disabled) but brought on so young due to the hysterectomy, well at that time I still refused to go back on pain meds because it wasn't terrible pain yet, over the next year I was diagnosed with the genetic disorder called Marphans syndrome which caused severe muscle spasms, full blown osteoporosis and I was sent to multiple specialists who then found that I have several compressed disks and disks that slip which is why I had two ambulance rides a couple of months before when my back went out er gave me diladid in iv and hydromorphine to go home but very small amount, the spine Dr also found multiple other issues with my spine including a spinal fracture, and so on. My rheumatologist found that I have osteoarthritis and rheumatoid arthritis, within 4 months I'd lost my job because of missing work from the pain so I agreed to go back on pain meds at which time I refused to go on Percocet because the withdrawal was terrible when I decided to stop so I was at first prescribed 7.5/500 vicoden and within a couple months they also prescribed 2-15 mg morphine a day anyway long story short I was sent to pain management because my pain still wasn't under control, where I was increased to 3-30mg morphine er and 5- 10/325 Norco per day. That was almost 2 years ago, since I have been diagnosed with connective tissue disorder and lupus among less serious things, oh and I suffer chronic migraines for over 8 years. Anyway the last I'd say 15-16 months my meds stopped controlling my pain as much and eventually stopped helping at all at the prescribed dose, I lost several jobs, my business etc, I begin talking the amount that would help me work and care for my home family and animals, which was about 3 times what I was supposed to take, mind you I tried to do things right and talk to pain management drs for over a year, but they claim that your body doesn't build a tolerance haha my rear even my primary care who I used to be prescribed by said that you do and that's why he used to temporarily switch me every6 months to a different kind. Ok back on track so I found myself spending a lot of money just to be able to work, I hate who I've become and I fully believe that these are making my pain and severe fatigue so much worse than without them. So the last 6 weeks I've been reading these boards trying to find help because I absolutely can NOT go to my doctor, I've seen them report others who seek help. I'm on day 1 and I'm already feeling terrible, I really have no one to talk to about this because people I know d
    either don't understand the physical addition or they offer pills which is NOT what I want. I want off these meds except my muscle relaxers because they are the only way to keep these ridiculous spasms away that I have every day. I want very much to do the Thomas recipe however I don't have the money to purchase all that stuff. I just moved and it took everything. What I do have are muscle relaxers, off brand Imodium (same aactive ingredient that was posted) I have only 2 anxiety meds which I know isn't going to help me, and butabutiol for my migraines. I couldn't get anything else on the list nor do I even have Gatorade, 7up, bottled water etc. I did ask my mom to help me for a few days but unfortunately she can't and that's probably best because I know that she has meds I'd probably break down and beg for. I really hope this is a pretty anonymous place. Anyway does anyone have any advice for me, encouragement or anything? I know many are going to say that I really need the other things on Thomas recipe but I simply can't get them. I HAVE to do this it's gotten out of control the last couple of months. EVERYONE important in my life I'm sure is suffering even though they don't even really know what you is going on all most know is my legit physical problems and how it makes me so unable to be a normal 33 year old. I understand that I will never be healthy and who I was before, however I also understand that I'm making my situation much worse by taking these meds. Thank you all for any advice and support.
    How are you brother, i feel you and can relate to you. I'm on day one myself. 27 hours clean. I tried quicting about 3months ago. I relapsed due to getting 2 more scripts due to a ailment. Now dr don't want me on this no more and that's it. I can get more but it requires time and money i just don't have. So im facing this as my full blown attempt to finally stop. It sucks bad. I don't feel right in the mind. Very emotional. Hate myself. And wondering how in the world will i live in this reality. But. . I know this is just temporary. Ive been through this many times and know it does get better! Hard to believe that right now. .. but it does. Pm for encouragement.

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    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    I'm trying to hang in there, my sscripts weren't cut off or anything but because I got out of control I'm out and I want to quit and never go get another script

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    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Also..... best way to quit in my opinion is to just go cold turkey. Its faster. The first 3 days are the worst. Then the next 3 days you slowly feel better. On the 2nd week most physical symptoms are very minimal. But mental stability is bad. You have ups and downs all day. That's when most break down. After 12 days, that's when the magic happens. You notice your mind leveling out and have small bouts of natural happiness and contempt. Its small but its a glimpse to the real you. After 3weeks only have brief periods of mood swings. You feel up and down still. But with longer bouts of happiness . When you are on day 21 to 30, you don't crave no more. But be careful. .. thats when you start thinking of how good the pills make you feel and start racing in your mind in how to get a script. After 1 month, you are in the clear. You are naturally happy and can live again. That's from my observations. The key is to have incredible will power. In which i have but just not enough. Ive gone almost 2 months clean before. It's a good feeling. But some how i always manage to get a script. It's good to break all connections to dr. And friends with them. In my case. .. dr may won't give me no more. So im blessed i guess. Add much as i hate it, i know it's for the good of my life. Now my brother, its time to beat this. Expect to be very emotional. ...i know i am atm. But like i said. .... its temp. I hope time flys this month. I hate this feeling bad.

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    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    That's dangerous, if your scrips are not cut, i how you have godly will power! I found out i can't stop if i can get them. That's just me and im sure many others. You have to remember this is like >>>>>>, very hard to stop unless something big happens in your life that makes you stop. Ive never met someone that stopped with access to the scripts. Unfortunately these opiete meds rewire the brain, and brings down the strongest humans.

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    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    Ya I went a couple of years without meds. I think that the hardest part for me besides the withdrawal of cold turkey is going to be living with the pain from my multiple conditions but the way I see it I'm living with the pain now because the meds no longer help unless I triple the dose which leaves me out in about 8-9 days and spending more than my rent just to not be sick. It's pointless and the guilt is unbearable the last month. I'm doing pretty rough and I know it will get worse before it gets better. My last med was yesterday at 530 am and only a small amount at that. I really want this and I know that I don't have the willpower to taper I tried it didn't work. So that's why I'm doing it this way. I have done it before many years ago although the meds I was on then were nothing in comparison to what I have been on the past couple years. I really wish that I had someone to help me for 3 days to cook take dogs out etc but I don't so as a mother I still have to do these things which is extremely difficult and it's only the first day really.

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    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    Also I am not going to pick them up, my appointment is still like 2 weeks away I will be over the physical hopefully and I will probably just call and tell them I took myself off again because they were not helping, they haven't been helping for over a year and they know it. I don't want them to cut me off or tell my Dr only because this stays in your file FOREVER and you are forever labeled. Whereas if you stop and act like it's no big deal it's not the same thing in file. Anyway that's how it works here with people I know

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    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantmylifeback5409 View Post
    I'm trying to hang in there, my sscripts weren't cut off or anything but because I got out of control I'm out and I want to quit and never go get another script
    Quote Originally Posted by wantmylifeback5409 View Post
    Ya I went a couple of years without meds. I think that the hardest part for me besides the withdrawal of cold turkey is going to be living with the pain from my multiple conditions but the way I see it I'm living with the pain now because the meds no longer help unless I triple the dose which leaves me out in about 8-9 days and spending more than my rent just to not be sick. It's pointless and the guilt is unbearable the last month. I'm doing pretty rough and I know it will get worse before it gets better. My last med was yesterday at 530 am and only a small amount at that. I really want this and I know that I don't have the willpower to taper I tried it didn't work. So that's why I'm doing it this way. I have done it before many years ago although the meds I was on then were nothing in comparison to what I have been on the past couple years. I really wish that I had someone to help me for 3 days to cook take dogs out etc but I don't so as a mother I still have to do these things which is extremely difficult and it's only the first day really.
    Ha! Should have said sister. Lololol! My apologies . I know what you mean, i was also given a last script to taper. 50 lortabs 5\325. I used them in 7 days. I was told to use it to taper. Nope, i couldn't resist. I had to take the usual morning dose too get me going, then another dose in the afternoon. Finally the final one in the evening to unwind. I knew ifyouhavei woyld run out fast. . But didn't care. In your case If you are in pain, its harder. But you know the agony very well when you run out one week before you can get more. Its torturing ! Reality in your eyes is different. Its weird, like you are or of place and don't belong here. But that's the deal you make with these pills. I managed to never get past 10mg of hydro for almost 8 years. Never got my very high but it gave me pain relief and a nice happy feeling. I kept the dose low fortunately. But even that low, man do i go through hell when i run out until the next fill ! I was running out 12 days early! For the last year i have been print myself through gell for 12 days every month! I am exhausted . Tired. And ruined lots of things. Luckily i still have my family though. Some loose even that. What you have to do is commit. And make it to day 12. If you do. .. you will see your life improve slowly. And everyday becomes normal. You live again. You save so much money! It was costing me close to 350$ a month for 90 pills. That's a beautiful car payment! What the hell! Also try to stay busy, even telling your story to strangers on boards like this. It helps a little. When you stop posting and don't care at all about posting, that's when you know you are almost there! If you have little kids, remember them! That helps!

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    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantmylifeback5409 View Post
    I'm trying to hang in there, my sscripts weren't cut off or anything but because I got out of control I'm out and I want to quit and never go get another script
    Quote Originally Posted by wantmylifeback5409 View Post
    Ya I went a couple of years without meds. I think that the hardest part for me besides the withdrawal of cold turkey is going to be living with the pain from my multiple conditions but the way I see it I'm living with the pain now because the meds no longer help unless I triple the dose which leaves me out in about 8-9 days and spending more than my rent just to not be sick. It's pointless and the guilt is unbearable the last month. I'm doing pretty rough and I know it will get worse before it gets better. My last med was yesterday at 530 am and only a small amount at that. I really want this and I know that I don't have the willpower to taper I tried it didn't work. So that's why I'm doing it this way. I have done it before many years ago although the meds I was on then were nothing in comparison to what I have been on the past couple years. I really wish that I had someone to help me for 3 days to cook take dogs out etc but I don't so as a mother I still have to do these things which is extremely difficult and it's only the first day really.
    Quote Originally Posted by wantmylifeback5409 View Post
    Also I am not going to pick them up, my appointment is still like 2 weeks away I will be over the physical hopefully and I will probably just call and tell them I took myself off again because they were not helping, they haven't been helping for over a year and they know it. I don't want them to cut me off or tell my Dr only because this stays in your file FOREVER and you are forever labeled. Whereas if you stop and act like it's no big deal it's not the same thing in file. Anyway that's how it works here with people I know
    yup.. im in CA and its the same here. Just tell them you don't need them at the moment since it's not helping and you will go off . That's what i do. I asked for a final script, doctor said to use what he gave me slower to continue to taper. Told him i used a little more than tapering but understand and will use the rest slower. I left it at that. Do if i do need them in the future, ill get them for real emergencies. But not way well i get a refill and won't ask again, that will raise a red flag! I know it! So. .....give it your all! Resist grabbing another script! That's key!

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    Well, don't know how you feel atm. But I'm on 30 hours clean and very emotional. Smallest thoughts hey me so down. I tend to get very nostalgic and miss my old self. Hope you are doing better.

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    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    Yes this is hard. I would never let myself get sick when I ran out and that's when I knew I had a problem,when I didn't care how much money I spent just to not be sick. I am not even financially stable to start with then I'm spending the money I do have. Just not good at all. Right now I'm feeling super upset and I feel like I can't handle it already ugh. I know it would be easier if I even had money for the things on that list or even stuff to drink. And someone to help me through this. But I don't and I just feel so sad scared upset pissed Idk but mostly pissed at myself. No one did this to me so why should they support me and help me.
    Ilovemtndogs7 likes this.

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    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Yup. You are very close to the hours i have clean. So you may be going through the same emotional roller coaster. I'm home, bored and don't want to go out. I look out the window and get depressed. I see people walk by, happy. And I engage in a self conversation in how stupid i have been. Then i get real sad and gloomy. Hate myself. But! I know these steps of withdrawals. Its the stages of getting clean. You don't have the chemistry leveled out in your brain. Dopamine is low. It's the process OP. Remember. . The more hours pass by, the harder it will get. Eventually within 72 hours you will hip peak and its a slow down hill. You might be hopeless and depressed right now, i am.... but its part of the deal. Nothing you can do. You can try otc meds or other prescribed medicine but from my personal experience, its makes the recovery longer. I rather go through hell in the shortest amount of time than prolonge it. Do more reading on Peple who went through this. It helps! Trust me... it will pass! I'm doing this alone with no one knowing, im too ashamed to let people know. So im alone , but even talking to you. .a stranger helps. I get to release needed thoughts snd have someone acknowledge them. Again. .. this is not my first time going through this. I'm a veteran who has failed many times. This is my number 4 real attempt in quitting for good. And i want too. That's key! If you are being forced to quit, you fail. But wanting to quit is key. I hope i make it myself and how you make goods progress. Just remember that little girl you used to be, and how life was normal and needed no pain killers. Then aim for that.

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    Geez.... its hard. I hate it myself so bad. Hang in there. ..... i am.

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    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    I cracked. I was going not to take anything but i got so depressed and emotional. I took 28mg of loperamide about 1 1/2 hours ago. I could not take the gloom. Loperamide is a otc anti diahrrea medicine. In high enough dosages it helps tremendously with the symptoms. I have good experience with it in the past but in higher dosages. I just don't want to prolong this. Do i think 28mg should not prolong it. I hope not. Im feeling a very slight improvement. But might be placebo.

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    Wantmylifeback, when i was little i had a police officer enter my 4th grade class. He talked to us about how drugs are bad and to never accept drugs. And i remember saying in my thoughts " i will never do drugs! That's crazy". Every time i go through this withdraw I remember that little boy saying that. That energizes my will. Maybe think of your childhood and remember yourself.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 05-02-2015 at 08:08 PM. Reason: editing

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    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    Yes thankfully I am living on 20 acres shared with only one person who doesn't walk near my house. I probably couldn't go out yet if my life depended on it, I'm just in so much pain. Though I must say that the imodium recommend in the Thomas recipe has helped a great deal with the stomach side of this. Oh but I wish I had the potassium to help with my legs as I know that part will likely be worse tmrw and it's bad already, driving me nuts. No one really knows what I'm doing either except for my mom and a friend who just offered me more meds, told me to taper I explained that I simply can't, I've tried but I always give in and take whatever makes the sick stop which is not helpful. My kids do not know of this, they are old enough I could probably tell however I refuse to because it's not fair to them. They simply think I have the flu and although very sick I'm trying to continue keeping house semi clean and cooking for them etc. Even though they are 13&15 and can cook. I just don't ever want them to look at me different and that's why I MUST stop now and find a way to live with the pain from my illnesses. Heck I already have a liver issue at 33 although docs say that it's not from my meds I certainly don't think its good for my liver especially the mass amount of Tylenol in the Norco 5 times a day IF taken as prescribed. I want to be around for my kids, I want to smile and laugh again I don't ever want to throw down bill money again. Yes you're so right, the emotional part is hitting big time the past couple hours, I locked myself in my room mostly and I have been crying a lot. I don't want kids to see that. Everyone thinks I have the flu. A friend is bringing me potassium and melatonin thank goodness maybe my legs will calm down

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    Give it time. ... it will get better. So it for your kids. I am for sure. And i think this is it, i do want to quit.

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    I know it will. Mostly I'm positive about it but of course I'm having a roller coaster of emotions the past few hours but I have not called back down focusing on TV because I enjoy I'm cuddling with my dog who definitely no but I need extra love right now I'm so grateful for these dogs I know I can do this I have to do this for so many reasons myself my kids my business my life I just have to do this I want to have as much of a normal life as possible with my conditions and this it is destroying everything I can't let it be destroyed anymore. I am so grateful for this forum and having someone to talk to who is going through exactly what I am right now as well as reading thousands of other people affected by this and how they beat it and it gives me a lot of hope. I would first like to apologize for anything that may not make sense because I am on my phone posting and using talk to text because I'm too shaky to actually text
    Last edited by Anonymous; 05-02-2015 at 09:27 PM.

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    I'm the same way, i won't tell my girl anything. Maybe in the future. But i check any medicine given to her. If it's even Codeine , i won't let her take it. Maybe in the future when im completely out the woods, ill tell her my struggle so she understands the dangers or even doctors medicine. It's too easy to love these pills.

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    Quote Originally Posted by wantmylifeback5409 View Post
    I know it will. Mostly I'm positive about it but of course I'm having a roller coaster of emotions the past few hours but I have not called back down focusing on TV because I enjoy I'm cuddling with my dog who definityoucangetely no but I need extra love right now I'm so grateful for these dogs I knyouhaveow I can do this I have to do this for so many reasons myself my kids my business my life I just have to do this I want to have as much of a normal life as possible with my conditions and this it is destroying everything I can't let it be destroyed anymore. I am so grateful for this forum and having someone to talk to who is going through exactly what I am right now as well as reading thousands of other people affected by this and how they beat it and it gives me a lot of hope. I would first like to apologize for anything that may not make sense because I am on my phone posting and using talk to text because I'm too shaky to actually text
    ha! I know that feeling. Maybe give loperimide a shot. The 28mg of loperamide i took around 4pm had finally gone to work. Takes about 4 hours to be effective for some reason. But I'm more stable. My out of control emotions have leveled slightly.
    You can buy them at Target ir Walmart. Like 6 dollars for 100 pills. Imodium also has it, that why people say is god sent for withdrawals. But you have to jug alot of it. That's why i just preffer the 2mg pills. Please understand, it will be rough tomorrow. Even worse than today. But at least you will be entering the 3rd day. You have about 4 hours more than me. My last dosage was yesterday at 9am. So you are doing good. There's no way around these stages from my experience. Only time. But loperamide is the only thing that actually worked in the past. I heard about it through these forums and others. I once took 100mg of it in which is a mega dose. Right when i was full blown depressed and in a dark darrrk very dark hole in my mind. 5 hours later iwas 100% contempt and happy like if i was going through nothing. But there's not enough studies on it. Do i never did it again. I dropped it to 72mg then to 60mg then to 40 andv then quit. It made it bearable. But i think it did prolonged it a bit. So im trying to just get all the nasty feeling now asap to get over it. It's the shortest route. So hopefully you make it and i finally learn my lesson. Remember . .. the key here is to WANT to quit.

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    Yes I got off brand Imodium and has loperamide HCI 2 mg per capsule and so far it definitely has helped a lot. I know tomorrow's going to be much worse than today and I am really hoping to just knock myself out with my butalbital and sleep hopefully. having the potassium is going to help a great deal with my leg issues. Has anyone heard of using hydroxzine to help withdrawal? I read that somewhere just now and I looked it up and it says that is one of the things they give it for. I happen to have a bottle that was left at my house like a year ago. I wonder if this will help since I have no benzo anxiety meds, these are non benzo but are commonly used for anxiety

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    Quote Originally Posted by wantmylifeback5409 View Post
    Yes I got off brand Imodium and has loperamide HCI 2 mg per capsule and so far it definitely has helped a lot. I know tomorrow's going to be much worse than today and I am really hoping to just knock myself out with my butalbital and sleep hopefully. having the potassium is going to help a great deal with my leg issues. Has anyone heard of using hydroxzine to help withdrawal? I read that somewhere just now and I looked it up and it says that is one of the things they give it for. I happen to have a bottle that was left at my house like a year ago. I wonder if this will help since I have no benzo anxiety meds, these are non benzo but are commonly used for anxiety
    Give it time, more ppl should respond. Mayweather fight is on, maybe that's why is slow. I have those pills too, i don't react well to them . I don't know if they work for wd.

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    Ys I've never had them before. I found them in my boxes and I remembered that she left them at my house so I looked them up. And they are mostly used for anxiety but they are also used to aid in withdrawal so I'm Not sure if they will help. I finally have potassium so I hope that will help with my crazy legs. I also now have a few adivan and tons of vitamins, kava kava and Gatorade and 7 up so I'm taking the melatonin now in hopes of some sleep. Hoping that tmrw is not to bad for either of us,

  24. #24
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Hey! How you feeling? Did you sleep well? I slept ok, 11pm to 6am. Had strange dreams, always get then during withdrawals. But slept good. The loeramide really kicked in around 9pm. I was not gloomy and emotional. That thing always works! I think that's why i sleep ok. You should give it a shot if you can't handle the mentality part. I know you said you had imodium, but 1 or 2 dosages of that only gives you 4mg of loperamide. You have to really increase it by taking the 2mg pills of it. 28mg was enough for me to feel good and contempt. Research loperamide fir withdrawals on google. Another day ahead of us! 46 hours clean, you should be at 50 hours clean. We ate half way there for that magical over 100 hours, that's when you get small brief glimpse of hope!

  25. #25
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    I'm doing surprisingly well. I took about 5 of the 2 mg Imodium pills with 2mg of lop in each. I took some anxiety meds and after I got the potassium pills my legs finally eased up and I took another soma and managed to sleep most of the night.

  26. #26
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    I think that with everything else that was finally brought to me such as Gatorade, vitamins, anxiety, kava kava, melatonin and of course the potassium, helped so so much within an hour my legs calmed down. It all helped, I'm so surprised that I passed out at about 10 my time and slept til 4am then was able to sleep again from 4-8 am when my dogs were crying to go outside. I'm so amazed how well these things help. When I kicked a much smaller habit years ago of only a few perks I was so sick I thought I would die, I'm feeling positive today that I am going to win this battle. My mom actually brought me a few meds I'd left with her for a drop last month because everyone says that I should taper which I know that I can't do, anyways they are sitting in my bathroom untouched I'm very proud to say, I didn't want them here I even yelled at her for bringing them when she brought everything else but I put them away because I want my life back and that's NOT the way I will get it. The very worst thing for me right now is my back pain, it's horrendous!! Also the pain in my hands from the RA. It's a little scary to wonder if my back will always be in this much pain but then I kinda think that the back pain is just magnified right now because of my body going to withdraw? I hope so. Anyway the things that I have found so far to be the biggest blessing is my somas, the anxiety meds, definitely the loperamide and the potassium, I was given a super high dose of those, I can't really speak to the rest of what is in the Thomas recipe because I don't have what it said is most important like the L- whatever it is or the B6 I only have the multi vitamins but it does have B6. I know that those of us going through this WILL make it. I know that I listed what I am prescribed but vaguely said that I have to take 3 times that for pain relief, so let me just say what I actually was talking for my pain relief which was costing me everything. See above for what I was prescribed for years if you want but this is what I had been taking. 90mg morphine 3 times a day = 270mg per day and 50 mg Norco 3-4 times a day = 150-200mg per day. I was out of control mostly because I allowed my tolerance to get out of control. I blamed the doctor for not switching me once in a while like my old Dr however ultimately I'm the one who overtook, I knew better but I wanted relief to do my very physical housecleaning job which is my business for many years and I'm going to lose it if I can't do this. Whoever else is reading this please know with these things suggested its much more bearable. I feel lucky to have found this recipe

  27. #27
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Ahh... thats good to hear! Awesome awesome awesone ! Im feeling ok myself. Slight apathy and already feeling slight emotional. But its a ok morning. Hopefully you don't touch those meds that's got brought! Remember. ... taking even one pill resets the process. And its all over again. And sometimes you enter the same cycle and continue the pill abuse for months. Loosing more. Good luck.

  28. #28
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    I'm actually thinking of calling my friend who is an ex addict now a recovery support specialist and asking him to pick these up and keep over there but we share the same primary care Dr and he has no idea I'm doing this. Ya I know I should be able to go to him of all people but I just don't want him to know that I've been abusing them and taking way to many to get relief. I was so super emotional last night before my mom brought some vitamins and stuff to drink and the anxiety meds my friend sent with her. It seems to have helped a lot because shortly after I was asleep. As not to say that I won't get that way again, angry sad and so on because I know I probably will. Hang in there!! We are worth it that much I know. My time I'm at 53 hours without a pill, halfway through the worst of it I think
    Ilovemtndogs7 likes this.

  29. #29
    crazyfrog is offline Banned
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    Yup.. half way. One thing you have to remember, the mood swings will cone and go in the next 3 days. You will have a bad day. I promise you that. 2nd week it slowly gets better. To me the magic day is on day 12. If you reach that. .. you are home free if you keep your will power. Only way I'll get back on these pills is im guaranteed I'll have plenty for all the month. Otherwise absolutely no way.I'm so sick of going through wd every month. And i know withthe new laws is even harder to get this med. At least in CA. And im broke to switch doctors and have them run new tests and new xrays. Just too expensive. I have to try life without these pills.

  30. #30
    wantmylifeback5409 is offline Junior Member
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    But that's just it, no matter if they increase us to what we actually need or not, eventually that won't be enough either. Yes my pain management place completely sux but forced me to make this decision after almost a year of my meds not helping my pain and spending more and more. Even if they increase or change them eventually it won't be enough for our body and we will be right back here going through this hell again.

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