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10 year addiction to opiates/suboxone. Just looking for support I guess.
  1. #1
    Perculator is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2016

    Default 10 year addiction to opiates/suboxone. Just looking for support I guess.

    Hello everyone!

    So, I've been addicted for quite a bit here now, starting off with low levels of vicodin, and after loving the way it made me feel and growing tolerant moved up to taking Norco and Lortab, and percocet when I could get it. I did this for about 6 years, and luckily, even though the habit was quite expensive, never moved into >>>>>>.

    While attempting to kick the opiate addiction for perhaps the 4th time a friend at work told me to try suboxone, and gave me some, boy did I think that was great (not knowing I was trading a demon for a devil). So, I continued to get suboxone off the streets for almost 4 years. Now, I've tried to quit suboxone too.. But now realize all of my attempts were half hearted. I wasn't ready to be done.

    Recently my connection got cut and unless I wanted to go legit, I had to quit. Seeing as how my home and family life was suffering from my robotic like state, I chose to quite and told my wife the truth, finally.

    Today is the end of day 13 being clean. Now admittedly I wasn't using as much as many, maintaining a dose of 1-2mg x2 per day for years, but even at that dose I've been unable to kick it, I would get all of the usual symptoms people get and it would suck for a week until I weakly gave into the urge.

    For some reason this time hasn't been as hard. Maybe it's a combo of having came clean to and having the support of my wife, not being able to get them now, and/or just being plain out fed up.

    This time around I'm actually sleeping, my body doesn't ache too bad, no diarrhea, no stomach cramps, I don't know, I can't explain it. BUT, and yes it's a big but, I can't stop thinking about it. Wanting it, at times almost convincing myself I NEED it. I am also experiencing really bad mood swings, depression and very low energy (I work 70 hrs a week and am the bread winner, I can't have this!).

    I was honest and open with my GP. She referred me to a pain management specialist and a psychological specialist, I've not gone to neither because I'm worried about them putting me on something, when I feel like surely I have to be close here. She also prescribed Paxil for depression, saying it won't help right away but that someday soon it would lift the fog. Idk.

    Currently I'm taking b6 and L-Tyrosine, and around the clock advil lol. I'm doing OK physically but mentally this is killing me. What do I do guys?
    Last edited by Anonymous; 11-28-2016 at 08:01 PM. Reason: Title

  2. #2
    DravenDomnq is offline Advanced Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2016


    Welcome, and that's great that you've gone through that so far (on day 11 myself). I can relate to a lot of your story as I was on oxy for over a decade and just a week and a half ago decided to do the same. Going through a lot of the same mental struggle as well, but know I'm doing the right thing. This place is a great place to be, and can offer some amazing support. One thread that really helped me a lot was the Thomas Recipe (link included), lot of good advice on it and I think the vitamins/suppliments are helping me with some of my mental fog and energy. Also, another thing that has really helped me mentally is putting a different routine in place of each time I would take a pill. When I'd take my first pill I'll take my vitamins/suppliments instead, second pill shower instead etc. Has got me starting to change my mindset a bit as well. Still struggling a bit, but not nearly as bad as I was when this started.

  3. #3
    freeme47 is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2016


    Hey draven, read your posts and wow you have really done amazing. I can totally relate to all the medication you were taking and when you were abusing. I was the same but I now try not to take even a paracetamol I
    Unless I really, really need it as we are addicts and it's the whole taking something to make us not feel or feel better. We have to learn new ways of feeling good through exercise, friends, family, music anything that isn't going to harm us. Hope your meeting went well. My first time was last Sunday and I was also so nervous and struggled with the whole not drinking alcohol thing as I've never had a problem with it but after listening to people there I realised that also makes me act in a crazy way and I don't need it. So this xmas will be drink and drug free.

    Hope today is a good day for you you have come so far. T
    DravenDomnq likes this.

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