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21 days free of Methadone and hydromorphone.
  1. #1471
    froggy_069 is offline Member
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    Happy Monday! Hope you had a good day,

    ~ Froggy
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  2. #1472
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Hey hey Foggy...
    Happy hump day.
    I'm glad your here posting. Did I say how proud of you I am. Your doing amazing.
    I feel the hope and inspiration you are sharing here.
    Have a wonderful day my friend...
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    ***Stay Strong for Today***

  3. #1473
    UncleLeo is offline Advanced Member
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    Good morning Lvg. It's now June 2018...can you believe it?? I kinda can't... all still feels very very weird.
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  4. #1474
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    There you are....
    Ooooo I know right June 2018.... I am still weird ha throw in some crazy
    Days months years are flying by eh... How's the taper coming? You been Mia was getting just a bit worried. Still think about you every morning but not flipping you off today ha today I'm grateful for you...
    What a ride eh...
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    ***Stay Strong for Today***

  5. #1475
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Hello forum Family...
    Life on life's terms... I'm a grateful recovering addict today. I love life I love myself today... 20 months ago I was Done with the garbage and I can promise you that if you really want this for yourself it's possible. This has not been a cakewalk to say the least it's been pretty dang hard and some days still is. But perseverance and one day at a time has lead me here. Having support because this addict cannot do this alone, having gained the tools to handle most of what life throws a me now I'm not perfect but just for today if I don't put one in me I'm winning... So with all that said because I'm so grateful today. I have to have a procedure done I'm scared to death and let me tell you my disease my addict brain is not scared of the procedure I'm scared of being in the operating room getting knocked out with a narcotic straight into the vein geeze awful I know it's just a thought but wow it's screaming at me... So scared I'm going to wake up and be off to the races. Talk about life on life's terms...

    ~just for today
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  6. #1476
    UncleLeo is offline Advanced Member
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    Good morning Lvg. Appreciate you my friend. So proud of how far you've come...docks all day

    Sorry to hear you need to go to the hosp...never fun no matter what it is. But you've got this. Hopefully the medication will put you to sleep? So maybe re-frame it as that?

    My friend who is a dentist and used to dole out scrips told me - 800mg of Ibuprofen followed by 2 Tylenol two hours later usually will do the trick for the immediate post procedure pain day or so...

    I know you got this...once you've seen that darkness we went through - soooo not worth it and you know that. Keep updating!

  7. #1477
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    The darkness that's to kind of a word. It was a war my friend...
    Leo it's not about the pain it's the stinking thinking I allow to occupy my mind. It's crazy how all consuming it can be. Sick addict thinking for sure. I'm sure all will be well I just needed to get that out... Just so hard to put it all out sometimes eh... Glad your still here my friend...

    ~what lives in the dark stays in the dark~
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  8. #1478
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lvg nghtmare View Post
    Hello forum Family...
    Life on life's terms... I'm a grateful recovering addict today. I love life I love myself today... 20 months ago I was Done with the garbage and I can promise you that if you really want this for yourself it's possible. This has not been a cakewalk to say the least it's been pretty dang hard and some days still is. But perseverance and one day at a time has lead me here. Having support because this addict cannot do this alone, having gained the tools to handle most of what life throws a me now I'm not perfect but just for today if I don't put one in me I'm winning... So with all that said because I'm so grateful today. I have to have a procedure done I'm scared to death and let me tell you my disease my addict brain is not scared of the procedure I'm scared of being in the operating room getting knocked out with a narcotic straight into the vein geeze awful I know it's just a thought but wow it's screaming at me... So scared I'm going to wake up and be off to the races. Talk about life on life's terms...

    ~just for today

    Sorry to hear the not-so-good news. I'm sure you'll get through it like the trooper/champion you are. If you can CT Methadone at the extremely high dose you did you can do just about ANYTHING in my opinion. In my experience I've never known anyone that has accomplished what you did. Don't know if I've ever told you that, but it's true.

    Let us know when your procedure is going to happen and the outcome. Just know we're all there with you. Having strong drugs/medication to put you to sleep for surgery or a procedure isn't a problem, it's what you do afterwards that matters. Try OTC pain medication first. As Leo mentioned, Tylenol and Motrin together DOES help a great deal to control pain. In the event you absolutely require stronger pain relief in the way of narcotics just use them sparingly (yeah, right as we're addicts), but I know you NEVER want to travel that dark, lonely road ever again. Read Cat's thread where she talks about pain relief after her back surgeries. I find it remarkable, and commendable that she only took one or two doses and then used Aleve I believe it was. I'm absolutely certain you'll use self control and common sense.

    You'll be fine my dear,
    Randy
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  9. #1479
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Hey lvg. Sorry to hear about the procedure. Can't really add more than what Randy and uncleleo have said. Just know there are so many here that are with you. So proud of what you've accomplished!!! You're an inspiration to all!! You got this

    Getting ready to snag some apples and peaches for you my friend.
    No date set yet for the relocation but GA is starting to wear pretty thin and FL is looming better every day now.

    Have a great Sunday!!
    Beef
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  10. #1480
    Leah987 is offline Senior Member
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    Hey, Lvg....how are you today?
    .....Ryka-Leah

  11. #1481
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Hey all,
    Randy so true I don't know anyone anywhere that CT methadone with success it's a shame that the failure rate is pretty much 100% for anyone reading I highly suggest you taper off the garbage even though just for today I'm clean and going strong. Doing it my way CT was a traumatic shock to my system I suffered a very long time unnecessarily. I suffered not on physically but Mentally prolly 15 months. I know now with my experience coming from high doses of methadone you should properly taper. Live and learn and share my experience...
    As far as having the procedure done I was putting out my true honest feelings...
    It's not the pain after I get up I've had prolly 30 surgeries since I was 17 today yep one ibuprofen works. I live with pain today that's easy. It's the stupid addict thinking that first drug they put in me the anesthesia will awaken the demon in me. It's just a thought but I wanted to put it out ya know it's my truth... As sick as that sounds...

    Ahh UncleLeo you just always know me my stinking thinking yep reframe it eh...
    Thanks for the reminder positive thoughts.... Keep it simple...
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  12. #1482
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leah987 View Post
    Hey, Lvg....how are you today?
    Hey hey Ryka.
    I'm doing amazing just living life...

    ~starting tomorrow anything life throws at me I'm ducking so it will hit someone else

    Living in the moment I can't worry about tomorrow today eh..
    Last edited by Anonymous; 06-24-2018 at 10:07 AM.
    ***Stay Strong for Today***

  13. #1483
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Ohhh Beef not fair teasing me like that...
    Apples and peaches oh my...
    Might as well stop on the way in for a sack of onions too
    Your not missing much its dang hot out here... I can make that apple pie on the dashboard of my car.. How is it going for you these days fox? Hope you are doing well...
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  14. #1484
    ChiefChe is offline Senior Member
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    Default Eviction Time- No Room at the Inn

    Lvg (Warrior)

    You never cease to Amaze Me (I’m watching u eyes). Wanted to stop thru right quick to drop off these eviction notices. The Inn has no room for stinkin thinkin!!

    I know, you know, you got this....you have no other choice, eh?? Ain’t nothing gonna make you give up that Championship belt you put on everyday....by choice!

    There is a silver lining on the horizon for use addicts when it comes to surgical procedures. Give a Google for SOFA- Society for Opioid Free Anesthesia. I know it’s not much help with the current situation but it could help alleviate those stinker thinkers.

    I Admire All that YOU Stand For,

    ❤️
    Che
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  15. #1485
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Geeze you saw my eyes rolling from there eh lol
    Are you kidding me you can bet I'm holding that title... There's absolutely nothing that could make me start day one over. Can you feel it... That's me cringing... I just have some God awful thoughts but just for today....
    I Google so much >>>> that's what we do yep insanity crazy chit...
    I'm just keeping it honest on here hopefully it helps someone....

    ~Yup UncleLeo docks all day...
    Glad that wasn't a typo
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  16. #1486
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lvg nghtmare View Post
    Hey all,
    Randy so true I don't know anyone anywhere that CT methadone with success it's a shame that the failure rate is pretty much 100% for anyone reading I highly suggest you taper off the garbage even though just for today I'm clean and going strong. Doing it my way CT was a traumatic shock to my system I suffered a very long time unnecessarily. I suffered not on physically but Mentally prolly 15 months. I know now with my experience coming from high doses of methadone you should properly taper. Live and learn and share my experience...
    As far as having the procedure done I was putting out my true honest feelings...
    It's not the pain after I get up I've had prolly 30 surgeries since I was 17 today yep one ibuprofen works. I live with pain today that's easy. It's the stupid addict thinking that first drug they put in me the anesthesia will awaken the demon in me. It's just a thought but I wanted to put it out ya know it's my truth... As sick as that sounds...

    Ahh UncleLeo you just always know me my stinking thinking yep reframe it eh...
    Thanks for the reminder positive thoughts.... Keep it simple...

    OMG....."Prolly 30 surgeries since the age of 17"!?!?!? Holy Smokes Girl!!!

    No wonder you ended up addicted. I had ONE (1) knee surgery due to an auto accident and that alone sent my life spiraling out of control for over 18 years. It's nothing short of amazing that you were able to get out of the fog.

    ***PROUD***PROUD***PROUD***PROUD***PROUD....OF YOU I AM!!!

    Randy

  17. #1487
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Awwww thanks Randy...
    Such a long time in active addiction.
    I can finally Finally say I'm just going about my day... Whew exhale....
    Much love my friend...
    I am Proud of you too...
    Look how far you have come Randy now if that's not a miracle eh...
    Be well my friend please stick around I will miss you I know how selfish...
    UncleLeo likes this.
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  18. #1488
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Morning my friend. How's the weather down there. I guess it's summer now huh. So probably really hot and really muggy.

    Have a great day!!
    Beef
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  19. #1489
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beefaroni7272 View Post
    Morning my friend. How's the weather down there. I guess it's summer now huh. So probably really hot and really muggy.

    Have a great day!!
    Beef
    Sooo hot...
    This is what I'm complaining about today ha
    Grateful addict clean and serene...
    How you been doing?
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  20. #1490
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Hey UncleLeo see you were up pretty dang early this morning...
    What's going on buddy? Sleep issues grrrrr thought we were passed that eh...
    My advice is this too shall pass and don't waste money on sleep studies... Hey sorry had to laugh if we can't laugh at ourselves today than what was all the Whining good for eh... Soooo much better today buddy.. Ok so how's it going no sugar today...
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  21. #1491
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Things are good up here. A little hot but not what you're dealing with. Work has been a little bit brutal lately. Trying to secure a job down there so we can get moving and hit the ground running when we move. Haven't set a date yet. But getting antsy and ready to come home. K and the kid are good. Both ready to spend time at the beach. Definately gonna take them over to your neck of the woods for that sugar sand you guys got. Beautiful beaches!!!

    That's about it from here. Just a lot of hurry up and wait going on.

    Hope you're having a great day!!
    Lvg nghtmare likes this.

  22. #1492
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Hot did you say hot did I say I hate the sweats...
    The beaches are so much nicer where your from. But hey it is Florida eh...
    Yes you prolly want a job before you pick up and go. I'm always on hurry up and wait.... Glad everyone is doing well...
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  23. #1493
    ChiefChe is offline Senior Member
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    Lvg (Survivor),

    On my way to rent a Uhaul. Should take me another 12-14hrs to get to you so hold tight....I gotta stack full of Eviction Notices!!

    Miss Ur Words,

    ❤️
    Kiss
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  24. #1494
    hopes1211 is offline Senior Member
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    Lvg - my eyelids are getting heavy. Up super late for me, but wanted to check on my little Florida friend. I hope you are doing well. Usual not to hear from you in a while, but I would imagine with the holiday everyone is busy. I wanted you to know I am thinking of you and and have only good thoughts going your way.

    Wanted to ask, how was your diet (and I am not talking about losing weight) I am talking about nutrition after you quit? I seem to crave salt. I swear if there was a slab outside I would be licking it! I have drank some pickle juice and want more! I wonder if this is normal? Odd question, I know, but it is 1:19 in the morning. Hope you are well.

    Hope
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  25. #1495
    Redy2BeeHappy is offline Member
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    Hey Living,
    How you doing in that Florida heat??? It is 97 or thereabouts today and it is HOT!! and that is without humidity!
    Hope you are well!
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  26. #1496
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Ohhhh Ready...
    So dang hot and humid did I say I hate to sweat
    Funny was thinking haven't heard a peep from you and here you are yea hope all is well with you to my friend you have to be close to 9 months eh? I actually just asked Draven if he heard from you coincidence ha. Update when you can my friend.
    ***Stay Strong for Today***

  27. #1497
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Default
    Hi Hope, I'm just an addict living my new clean life. I will be an addict with the disease of addiction the rest of my life. I don't have to search for that magical pill anymore I know I'm an addict I always want more of everything... Today it's about balance for me and believe me some days the scales tip one way or the other... It's not just the bad days but also the great days that can set me back. But if I want a peaceful serene life I have to put the work in so today I go to any lengths. As for my family well yes they know I had a problem with drugs we are the last to know we think we hide it well but we are usually the last to know eh... I come from school of hard knocks. My Mom psychoanalyst drug and alcohol counselor in law enforcement my sister also a police officer I left my career also in law enforcement to stay in active addiction. My father in the fellowship of Aa sober for 50 years, yes I knew I was absolutely thoroughly done with the garbage I quit cold turkey from massive amounts of drugs I didn't want to die alone so I called my parents got honest and detoxed at home really nothing anyone can do for you in early withdrawals but just be there for support. So with all that said it's possible for an addict, any addict, can stop using drugs, lose the desire to use, and find a new to live... That's the only promise I was given...
    ***Stay Strong for Today***
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  28. #1498
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    *Waving back hello*

    Hey you. Glad you had a good time at the convention. How are things down there besides hot and muggy?

  29. #1499
    Lvg nghtmare is offline Platinum Member
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    Hey hey, ughhh awful hot and humid I don't remember it being so hot not that I really cared about it before now clean geeze I hate to sweat the convention was pretty amazing downtown tpa you just don't realise how many recovering Addicts there are in our hometown. If anyone ever has a doubt that we can and do recover hit up a Na convention talk about faith, hope and unity... Na world convention is in Orlando this year end of August I just have to make that it will never be here again in my lifetime so actually really looking forward to that. Also maybe a quick stop at Disney lol.. How are things going with you and the family? Did you find a job here yet? Hope all is well...
    ~waving
    ***Stay Strong for Today***

  30. #1500
    Beefaroni7272 is offline Advanced Member
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    Well so far I've had about 3 Skype interviews and talked to 3 separate head hunters. So I got prospects. Just nothing yet. Slow with the holiday I guess for the last week or two. But I'm confident I'll grab something with my experience and work history. Just gotta wait for it and I'm not a patient person. Lol.

    Yeah I've been trying to see if there's a way I can get to Orlando and mix in a trip to Disney or the Harry potter park. (The kid has been relentless about wanting to go there) It would be amazing if we could get down there before obviously and then it's just a 2hour ish car ride. But either way I'd love to be there for that!!

    Other than that things are good. K has an ear infection so she has a doctor appt today. But that's about it. All is quiet. Gotta get back to work. Hope you have a great day my friend!!

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