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Going cold turkey from 6mg
  1. #1
    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Default Going cold turkey from 6mg

    I haven't been on in awhile. Last time I was tapering with the help of some great people on here and did well for awhile..then I screwed up. Things happened that I used as an excuse (the holidays, family stuff) and went back to 6. I have time off and family support right now so I decided to go for it. Friday I took my morning dose of 2 mg. then nothing until Sunday night when I took 1mg when my sitter fell through. (Excuses, I know). Nothing since then. Had I not taken that 1mg i should be in full withdrawal by now right? I've been sweaty/cold and hot , goose flesh, pretty severe back pain and trouble sleeping but nothing like the horror I pictured in my head. I'm wondering if I messed up my detox with that 1 mg and the worst is yet to come.
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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Also, I'm taking clondidine and have everything from the Thomas Recipe. I have no delusions about this being easy. I'm just wondering where I am on the scale. I've read that it takes 3 to 4 days to be out of your system so everything should be out except that 1mg right? Or am I doing 'junkie math' as it's so eloquently put.

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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Last night was rough. Not much sleep and I was thrashing around. Took a Librium (my doc prescribed a small amount) and got a little relief. This morning I feel ok. Just groggy.

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    UncleLeo is offline Advanced Member
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    Hang in there you're doing great. Don't over-think it as everyone is different. Whether its yesterday or today or tomorrow, just get through today, that's what matters each day Everyone will be rooting for you. Some other peeps that did some pretty big jumps will be able to give you some guidance
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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Thank you for the kind words. I wish I hadn't taken that 1mg. That must be what the hold up is. How are things going with you? I read so many stories but I thought you'd jumped from a higher dose as well?

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    TampaFlorida is offline Member
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    Hello Starling,
    Just like Leo said: one day at a time.
    You don't really know if you screw up or not since each person is different and what they experience.
    You already said it, this morning you feel ok. Sub detox is a roller coaster, you will have good and bad days.
    Savior the good and survive the bad.
    Besides, maybe that 1mg helped you to not have the worst symptoms ever. It could have even out your ride a bit. We will never know, so don't beat yourself up about that 1mg.
    Concentrate on how you progressing and you will make it.
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  7. #7
    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Tampa- I was wondering if that could be the case. (Hoping really) I'm semi functional today. Did some laundry and took a long bath in Epsom salt which really seems to help. Evenings and nights have been the worst but nothing I can't handle yet. I won't borrow trouble. I want this so bad. I've been on maintenance drugs for so long because of fear of withdrawal. Methadone for years then Suboxone for 9 months. I laid in bed for hours listening to music in my headphones last night and it sounded amazing. I stopped appreciating little things. I need to start moving around more. It helps my aches and pains and gets me out of my head. I'm rambling. Lol. I'll update tonight. Thanks for responding

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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Today I was very tired..lead feet. I forced myself to do 5 minutes on my eliptical which gave me spurts of energy. Tonight though, I feel ok! I haven't been eating much (lost 8 lbs in a week-positive side effect so I forced down some chicken for protein and bananas which I predict I'll hate after this is over- still sweaty so multiple baths are necessary. But otherwise ok. I know there's probably more to come but these breaks in between where I feel ok definitely make it easier. I had my back up plan in my head for days (re inducing at a lower dose then giving the taper another shot) but now I'm building confidence that maybe, just maybe I can do this?
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    ItsPossible is offline Member
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    Hey Starling,
    I am back also after a 6 month relapse.
    Now I don't know much about sub wds but I do know that this time around with the Clonodine really made a difference.
    I was dizzy and had to get up slowly but it truly helped me sleep.
    I had someone post on a thread of mine before about it so this time I was prepared.
    The hours seem to creep and so much can go on in your head. Try to hear what you're saying but then pivot your thinking to what you want, instead of focusing on what you don't.
    Whatever you put your energy on will be what you attract.
    I am with you on the bananas! lol
    If anyone ever asks you if you need anything, say yes, a protein smoothie.
    Mine was a saviour today because I didn't want to eat anymore bananas or banana bread lol
    I can keep you company along this journey.
    My mistake was listening to the voice that said I was better, and leaving this place that kept me accountable.
    Also I didn't like going to AA anymore but turns out it helped my mother in law get back into it and now she just celebrated her 10 year birthday!
    I got to read the poem YESTERDAY TODAY AND TOMORROW and although I was as high as a kite and nervous, I thought, I want to be up here one day celebrating my sobriety!
    So here I am, day 4 and waking up to day 5 tomorrow by the late afternoon.
    Hang in there. You know what you have to do and that time will help you heal.
    Maybe with those headphones you can google a healing meditation on YOUTUBE. So peaceful and calming.
    Love and Light xxoo
    Kim aka Butteflylove

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    ItsPossible is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starling12 View Post
    Also, I'm taking clondidine and have everything from the Thomas Recipe. I have no delusions about this being easy. I'm just wondering where I am on the scale. I've read that it takes 3 to 4 days to be out of your system so everything should be out except that 1mg right? Or am I doing 'junkie math' as it's so eloquently put.
    Are you using the clonodine as prescribed?
    Mine is 1 every 4 hours, 4 times daily.
    The first 2 days I took 4
    The third day I took 3
    The fourth I took 2 so far and will def have one before bed, and if I wake up in the middle of the night.

    My researched has shown me that its okay to use short term and as long as you taper off you won't experience hypertension. I'll see my doctor on Monday to discuss it further.
    It truly has taken the craving away from wanting the pills again and helped immensely with sleep which last time wasn't even happening for me.

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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Kim- thanks for the headphones suggestion! I'll check it out. Clondidine has def been a life saver for me. Last night the Librium was too but I don't plan to use it again unless very necessary. I'm super sensitive to benzos and chlonidine so I think they've been extra helpful. I only took one clondidine during the day and 2 at night. Mine are .1s. Are you on day 6 of CT? What milligram sub were you on? I keep telling myself not to celebrate too soon.. But right now I feel ok. Like I might be able to get some zzz's.. Helps hearing from others going through it. Keep me posted on how you are.

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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starling12 View Post
    Kim- thanks for the headphones suggestion! I'll check it out. Clondidine has def been a life saver for me. Last night the Librium was too but I don't plan to use it again unless very necessary. I'm super sensitive to benzos and chlonidine so I think they've been extra helpful. I only took one clondidine during the day and 2 at night. Mine are .1s. Are you on day 6 of CT? What milligram sub were you on? I keep telling myself not to celebrate too soon.. But right now I feel ok. Like I might be able to get some zzz's.. Helps hearing from others going through it. Keep me posted on how you are.
    It won't let me reply without replying to a quote- anyway, last night was rough. Lots of kicking and squirming again. I finally got tired of trying to sleep and got up at 3am and took a bath. After that I've been pretty good.. I ate my first hot meal in a week. Gumbo . That's right folks- in south Louisiana gumbo can be a breakfast food. If my body decides to reject it I'm in trouble though..it was spicy I really really need a few hours of sleep. I even put a bar of Irish Spring soap under the sheets (google it.. It's suppose to help with RLS). Don't know if it did any good but my bed smells nice . Going to try and sleep a couple hours then take my dog to the park. I've been cooped up too long. Day 6ish.. I guess it's actually day 4 since I took that 1 mg Sunday. I actually swallowed it after 4 minutes under my tongue because of the guilt so I wonder if I actually took less.. If any of the senior members get a chance, please weigh in on what u think. Is the worst yet to come?
    K

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    ItsPossible is offline Member
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    Good on ya! Praying the gumbo stays put!
    I had a breakfast sandwich and a hash brown today, my first breakfast in 5 days that wasn't banana
    I don't know anything about subs but I think your attitude is what will get you through the days xxoo
    Knowing sleep comes last for most... it's great that you got up and took a bath when you needed.
    My energy slipped away from me around lunch and maybe I should have slept instead of watching a show but it just makes time so much more bareable.
    Keep on keeping on.
    You've got this.... I'm happy for your days
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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Yea no sleep wears on ya after awhile. I'm really trying to avoid the Librium but if tonight is like last night, I might cave. My chances of being addicted to it are slim to none cuz I've never liked the way they make me feel. Like a zombie. For now that's better than twitching all night.. At the very least I won't take it two days in a row.
    I hear ya on the tv.. Sometimes it's better not to try too hard to sleep. Watching the hours pass can be torture. I watched the entire series of 'The Killing' on Netflix and it's really good if you like dark serial killer stuff. Now I'm watching 'it's always sunny in Philadelphia' and laughed myself to tears a few times. Comedies are probably a better choice right now. I find it strange that I can lay in bed during the day and RLS is minimal but when it's time for bed I'm flopping around like a fish. Nights are by far the worst. Stomach stuff is much worse today.. Back to bananas I guess. Lol. Hope you're doing well. Hot baths are great for short term relief from RLS and my heating pad and Tylenol is helping my back pain and feels good when the chills are bad..also an electric blanket if you have one. Hang in there. I'm here if you need to talk
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    ItsPossible is offline Member
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    Smile

    Oh the electric heating pad is my baby!
    It's on right now.
    I have a nice pillow and blanket that I bring to the couch every day and prop my feet up while sitting up.
    I find I get too lazy if i lay down so I try to sit up unless sleeping. Much easier on my back too.

    I just finished watching THE WIRE and it was really well written. A lot of information and some of the characters in it are real. Baltimore crime and how it is intertwined with politics. Once I got into it it was great.
    For comedy I have watched THE CRAZYONES with Robin Williams and Sarah Michelle Gellar... only one season and so sad he passed but worth the watch.
    Robin Williams motivates me to write more about mental health and addiction.
    We can do way better in getting more information and help out to people in need.
    MOM is a great 20 min sitcom about addicts and AA. Super funny but deals with the issues we do as well.
    I used to watch it with my mother in law when we went to meetings together.
    Hope today finds you feeling lighter from the burden of your worries. Happy Friday!

    Kim xxoo
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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    That's crazy what you said about writing about addiction. Last night when I couldn't sleep I was journaling and thinking someone needs to write a book strictly about suboxone- the TRUTH. The doctors are so grossly unaware of what the hell they're doing OR know exactly what they're doing when prescribing high doses- making money. The alarming amount of testimonials online about doctor incompetence and unwillingness to help those pleading to get off this drug after unnecessary long term use is disheartening. I do think Suboxone has saved lives in some cases.. And there probably are some that need to be on it long term. But if a patient says I want off, their doctor ( whom we should be able to TRUST) should KNOW the best way to go about it. Or atleast know more about the drug they're prescribing. I have experienced 2 sub doctors since I started last summer and both deserve to lose their license. The most recent being the worst. I went to him on SIX mlg wanting to taper and he told me (hand to God) 'if you go below 6 you're going to have to get off of it-it does nothing under 6mg'. Then my next visits with him he would ask 'how much are you on' and I'd say 6 and his response was '1 or 2?' I was like huh?? 6mg. Then he'd stress 'ONE OR TWO' I finally realized he meant 1 or 2 8mg strips and was basically offering me much more than I needed. So I said 2 and decided to try and taper on my own and not go back.
    The time and energy clearly isn't being put into teaching these Drs about this drug and monitoring what they're doing. No one is LISTENING to the thousands of people desperately trying to get off of it. A simple google search of 'suboxone withdrawal' is all they need to see. But it's only important to us addicts and our families and the taboo of addiction is probably why nothing is being done. I will jump off my soap box now. Lol. But I say write that book! Maybe no one is listening because not enough people understand addiction and we addicts aren't yelling loud enough.
    Whew that felt good- lol. As far as me right now, it's rough. It comes in waves that are wearing on me bit by bit. The little voice in the back of my head is saying 'stabilize and reduce'. I'm a single mom and my week of family support is up this weekend. They have to go back to their lives (understandably) Im not giving up at this moment though. Trying to focus and fight through each day, one at a time.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-29-2016 at 01:50 PM.
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    ItsPossible is offline Member
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    The book will be written! The stories will be told!
    I signed up for a course starting next week about Writing Personal Stories.
    I'm a bit nervous but excited to start this journey that I abandoned while I was too busy numbing my mind.
    I have more knowledge of Methadone in Canada then Subs but I went to school for journalism for 2 years so I like to do research!
    The wave of Powerful Positivity did was over me this morning and then a wave of extreme fatigue and pain tried to take over.
    I made an appointment with my old addiction counsellor.. appt end of February.
    Looked online for NA/AA meetings
    Looked up SmartRecovery online and went through some of the worksheets available.
    I was exhausted by the end of it so I had to take a break and close my eyes.
    These feelings will come in waves and being prepared is our best bet, but we are strong... look how far we've come already.
    I'll be here rooting for you Super Single Mom.
    I've realized how much my kids can do for themselves and me during this time.
    The feeling of shame and guilt just can't sit with me or I'll downward spiral.
    Listen to your body and take it one minute at a time.
    That's what I keep telling myself lol
    ARE WE THERE YET ??
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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    I loved writing from the time I was in second grade. I read a poem for the talent show in second grade and got 2nd place . In third grade I wrote a new version of Cinderella for the talent show ( and cast yours truly for the lead role lol) and won. My love for writing continued through college until my new love affair started with opiates. Don't get me wrong, I could spit out a hundred pages while on certain drugs, but of course that all changes over time. I did 6 years of methadone maintenance then straight to subs with the intention of tapering through the methadone withdrawal. And here I sit. Almost 9 months later. The first time I've put pen to paper in 7 years was last night. I think both suboxone and methadone fill up our receptors to the point that nothing else is able to give us pleasure. I have good memories in these years, but not great ones.. Not the kind that make you feel lucky to be alive. And as a mother, that has overcome me with sadness and guilt in this last week. THEY deserve more. I feel that I do too, but I did this to myself. They did nothing. One of my daughters (she's 7 and the reason I started methadone maintenance..my first of 2. Lots of guilt from being on it while pregnant but she was luckily born just fine) slept in my bed last night and I laid there watching her sleep thinking 'I'm so sorry baby girl'. The guilt is truly overwhelming at times. But I'm trying for them. I'm really, truly trying. It was easier to forgive myself for taking these drugs before.. I'm the baseball mom.. The 'my whole life revolves around me kids' mom. But I know I wasn't present in the most important ways. I want them to know their mom loves to write, and is passionate about music.. And all the other things I've lost due to this disease and my inability to kick it.
    Anyway- Sounds like we have a lot in common! How old are your kids?
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  19. #19
    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Also, do you have bad dreams right now? In the short periods I actually get sleep, I have terrible nightmares. All about my girls. I'm guessing it's that guilt manifesting in my dreams. The type of dreams that affect you long after you wake up from them.
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  20. #20
    ItsPossible is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starling12 View Post
    I loved writing from the time I was in second grade. I read a poem for the talent show in second grade and got 2nd place . In third grade I wrote a new version of Cinderella for the talent show ( and cast yours truly for the lead role lol) and won. My love for writing continued through college until my new love affair started with opiates. Don't get me wrong, I could spit out a hundred pages while on certain drugs, but of course that all changes over time. I did 6 years of methadone maintenance then straight to subs with the intention of tapering through the methadone withdrawal. And here I sit. Almost 9 months later. The first time I've put pen to paper in 7 years was last night. I think both suboxone and methadone fill up our receptors to the point that nothing else is able to give us pleasure. I have good memories in these years, but not great ones.. Not the kind that make you feel lucky to be alive. And as a mother, that has overcome me with sadness and guilt in this last week. THEY deserve more. I feel that I do too, but I did this to myself. They did nothing. One of my daughters (she's 7 and the reason I started methadone maintenance..my first of 2. Lots of guilt from being on it while pregnant but she was luckily born just fine) slept in my bed last night and I laid there watching her sleep thinking 'I'm so sorry baby girl'. The guilt is truly overwhelming at times. But I'm trying for them. I'm really, truly trying. It was easier to forgive myself for taking these drugs before.. I'm the baseball mom.. The 'my whole life revolves around me kids' mom. But I know I wasn't present in the most important ways. I want them to know their mom loves to write, and is passionate about music.. And all the other things I've lost due to this disease and my inability to kick it.
    Anyway- Sounds like we have a lot in common! How old are your kids?
    Girl do we EVER have a lot in common!
    First of all GOOSEBUMPS! Cinderella is my favourite fairytale. I've awlways wanted to write a modern version.
    Quick side story: the 2nd time I tried to quit I had been really mean to my friend while drinking and mixing percs. The next day I apologized and swore I would never be THAT person again.
    My husband and I went kayaking that day and while I was taking in the beauty of nature I ASKED the Universe to show me a sign!
    Well didn't I see this pink ball. But I was already passed it. I paddled my way against the current.
    Ya know what was on that ball?
    CINDERELLA!
    Not only her, but snow white and other princesses too but all I saw was CINDERELLA!
    I signed up for a childrens writing course and I don't know if it was the fear of not being good enough anymore because you're right, there is no creativity able to flow when we are consumed with addiction...
    So I copped out and drowned my days in sorrow, continuing to take the course but without presence and passion.

    YOU ARE AN ARTIST!
    Writer, musician.... these can be gifts and also curses.
    Self judgement, inadequacy... all the fear and doubt we put upon ourselves.

    I am giving you permission to LET IT GO!
    I've had many friends on methadone pregnant and the babies are healthy... but the moms..... they are wrecked with guilt and shames and those feelings just create bad choices.
    SO girl, I am so glad you are journaling. It will come back to you.
    Even if you write just for you, its so therapeutic.
    I am so glad that you felt the pain and said you're sorry, now please give yourself permission to LET IT GO.

    Not sure if you can make it to any meetings, but there is also online support from SMART RECOVERY.
    Pretty neat work sheets.
    Now, a warning..... I detoxed and began trauma treatment and I was not ready for it.
    I went through the rest of the PTSD stuff while hooked on pills again and I swore this time I was going to leave my past behind.
    Writing about addiction will surely cause triggers and unpleasant memories but if we have a plan in place of what we are going to do when we feel those awful feelings, we can be more successful in dealing with them.
    I learned a lot in the rooms of AA
    I even came up with my own label, Almost Alcoholic... but I know I can not control any substance like that... and I will go back when I'm ready!
    Baby steps.... as long as we are moving forward, it doesn't matter how fast.

    I am feeling all sorts of love for you and your beautiful family that is going to be better off because you went through this.
    You are the wonderful, amazing person you are today because of the struggles you've been through.
    I hope you allow yourself to love yourself and I promise GOOD THINGS will happen once you do!
    Love and light for now Starling xxoo
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    ItsPossible is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starling12 View Post
    Also, do you have bad dreams right now? In the short periods I actually get sleep, I have terrible nightmares. All about my girls. I'm guessing it's that guilt manifesting in my dreams. The type of dreams that affect you long after you wake up from them.
    No bad dreams, just bad thoughts.
    I take clonodine at night still. I sleep from 11pm to 230am, then 3:30am to about 6ish.
    WAAAAY better than the first time I detoxed and went a week with little to NO sleep.
    I know what they say about benzos but I'm super careful and its made it that much more bearable.

    My best friend took herself off methadone after 10 years and she said she felt like she was dying.
    I can only imagine but I am hear to listen if you want to talk about them.
    Our subconscious talks to us in our dreams.
    I always look up what my dreams mean to find the meaning when I don't know.
    One more thing I did my first try was : I started an email account for my now 7 year old boy and 5 year old boy and wrote them at their addresses when I wanted to share love or a moment with them.
    anytime I felt guilty about passed behaviour, I would write them something positive instead of dwelling too long.
    Find the lesson, forgive, let go, do something different
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  22. #22
    James19871 is offline Member
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    Hi Starling,

    Let me start by saying congratulations on your progress!! I'm very happy for you! I'm 55 days clean from 12 years of suboxone as of today. I know exactly what your going through. I jumped around the same dose as you.

    I'm reading your posts and everything your going through is perfectly normal. The dreams your having are called "drug dreams". I had them for the first month on and off. Most of them were either about using suboxone, or someone trying to kill me. Nice huh lol. This is due to your brain being In a tailspin after quitting suboxone.

    Please be patient with your recovery. Suboxone and methadone can linger in your body for up to a month. This is a worst case scenario. It depends on many factors, for example, metabolism, hydration, genetics, bodyfat, liver function, etc...

    In my experience, days 7 through 11 were the worst days for me. The days after and before weren't fun, but certainly not the worst. After day 11 things started getting a little better each day. The worst of it subsided after 3 weeks. We're all different though , just telling you my experience. Just take it one day at a time. Don't obsess about "what could" happen. Easier said than done, I know.

    Please know I'm not trying to scare you or discourage you by any means. Some people, including myself, thought that they would be 100% after a few weeks, then the harsh reality kicks in. I just want you to be mentally prepared so you keep fighting!! Sometimes the high expectations drive people back to addiction. But please know it's not all bad, you'll have good days and bad days. It's a long drawn out roller coaster ride. Just cherish the good days and fight through the bad. The reward you will feel when you get past the worst of it is so amazing! It's like a rite of passage.

    A few quick tips that really helped me tremendously:

    1. Take as many hot baths and showers as possible!
    2. Music with headphones. I see this was already recommended, excellent suggestion. To this day when I start feeling weak or get anxiety, my headphones almost immediately make me feel better. It's truly amazing. Try upbeat dance music. You won't regret it. Invest in good headphones. My Bose headphones are my best friend. Worth every penny. Music produces endorphins, that's been proven.
    3. Forums!! So many fantastic people here!!
    4. Search out Ryan Donnellys you tube videos. He's truly an amazing human being with so many inspiring videos. He's a recovering addict (very knowledgable) that's devoted his life to helping others. He's even given out his cell number on you tube. He's helped me tremendously.
    5. Excercise and stay as busy as possible. I feel great when I'm active, the second I sit I start getting lingering withdrwal symtpoms. Unless I'm listening to music.
    6. Hydrate, lots of water! Dehydration WILL aggravate withdrawal symtpoms.
    7. Eat as much lean white protein and veggies as possible. Also find a good whole food multi vitamin. Very important.

    I know these items are no secret, but these were my top 7 items that helped me. Hope this helps. Hang In there, your doing great!!
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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    James, thank you for the tips...Hot baths have definitely been helpful and music takes me out of my head for a little while..I've seen many of Ryan's videos and he is amazing to spend so much time helping addicts..my diet has mostly consisted of bananas and chicken breasts but I'll work on squeezing in some veggies when I can. Exercise has been hard. I did 30 minutes of cardio every day before the drop but 5 min has been the most I can handle since, and only twice. What do you mean by 'whole food' multi vitamin? I've been taking One a Day, 5HTP, Magnesium, vitamin B6, B12 and B complex. Having a rough day today.. The temptation to take a piece is strong :/

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    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by ItsPossible View Post
    No bad dreams, just bad thoughts.
    I take clonodine at night still. I sleep from 11pm to 230am, then 3:30am to about 6ish.
    WAAAAY better than the first time I detoxed and went a week with little to NO sleep.
    I know what they say about benzos but I'm super careful and its made it that much more bearable.

    My best friend took herself off methadone after 10 years and she said she felt like she was dying.
    I can only imagine but I am hear to listen if you want to talk about them.
    Our subconscious talks to us in our dreams.
    I always look up what my dreams mean to find the meaning when I don't know.
    One more thing I did my first try was : I started an email account for my now 7 year old boy and 5 year old boy and wrote them at their addresses when I wanted to share love or a moment with them.
    anytime I felt guilty about passed behaviour, I would write them something positive instead of dwelling too long.
    Find the lesson, forgive, let go, do something different
    I love the email account idea.. I'm definitely doing that. In my last dream my 7 year old daughter was taken by a man and somehow in the dream I knew he was hurting her.. I couldn't find her to help. I kept getting lost and was screaming and panicked. The one before that, my 6 year old was smoking crystal meth. She was white as a ghost and sickly looking. There was more but that's basically it. Beside the horrible content, they felt SO real.. Thinking of them now makes me cringe.
    How are you today? I'm struggling tbh.

  25. #25
    James19871 is offline Member
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    Dec 2015
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    Hi Starling,

    Hang in there, your doing a great job!!

    Veggies are very important and will make a big difference if can stomach them. What I do is throw some veggies in my nutribullet (blender). I use mild tasting veggies like carrots, celery, spinach, and cucumbers. Then I'll throw a small ammount of fruit In for flavor with some ice. You'll be surprised how good they can be. Fruit is great for you, but it contains allot of natural sugar. Again very good for you, but not in large quantities. Citrus fruits are great for recovery, and they aid in detoxifying. Bananas for potassium are great as I'm sure you figured out. Just keep you diet as balanced as possible, and it will speed your recovery.

    As far as the vitamins go, one a day vitamins are synthetic vitamins. Meaning their not made from food, they contain allot of junk. Since our bodies are so sensitive during recovery, the better quality supplements you get the better. Whole food vatimains are natural, their derived from food. No garbage, all good stuff. For example, valium >> valerian. Valerian is a natural herb, while Valium is a synthetic compound. Whole food supplements will give you allot more energy too. Target has a great line of products by a company called OLLY. A little pricey, but fantastic products. Also their gummies and their delicious lol. Especially easy to take when your withdrawaling. My mother is a nutritionist so ive been smothered with is stuff all my life lol.

    Hang in there, don't cave. Every piece you take will only set you back. Keep you mind occupied! Keep posting and watching Ryan's inspiring videos. Your doing great!!!
    Last edited by Anonymous; 01-30-2016 at 02:12 PM.
    Starling12 likes this.

  26. #26
    ItsPossible is offline Member
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    Jan 2016
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    Canada
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    Hey Starling,

    I was really struggling too with cravings today.
    When Yoga didn't help I booked it to a meeting.
    I was so scared to step in that room but once I did I knew it was right for me... just to be there the way I was feeling.
    Its okay to feel what you are, just know you are not alone and no judgement.
    There isn't any magical quick fix and those moments will build us, not break us.
    Acknowledge any new and good changes and pat yourself on the back.
    Say it LOUD I CAN DO THIS!
    I WILL DO THIS
    I AM STRONG ENOUGH
    You deserve a life of love and light. You're on your way to escaping the devil.
    24 hours.... that's all we've got.
    Almost into Day 7!
    I have company but I will be checking in to see how you're doing.
    Love and Light xxoo

  27. #27
    Starling12 is offline Member
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    Jun 2015
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    Well I took .5 last night. Couldn't handle it any longer. I'm not sure how much that sets me back but the relief was welcomed. I slept and felt ok today besides being extremely tired. still plan to stay the course though. I'm going to catch a meeting tomorrow. Haven't been to one in awhile and maybe that'll do me some good. Hope you're still doing well. I don't know how I'm doing at the moment. Physically better of course but mentally disappointed in myself-frustrated-wondering if that piece will start me over again. Sigh

  28. #28
    James19871 is offline Member
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    Dec 2015
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    Hi Starling,

    I wouldn't stress about it. Your getting to that part of the taper where it starts to become very difficult. You've gotten farther than I ever could. I jumped at 1.5mg. You should be proud of yourself. Give it another go tomorrow perhaps. You didn't set yourself back, don't let it get to you. Keep up the great work!
    ItsPossible and Starling12 like this.

  29. #29
    ItsPossible is offline Member
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    Canada
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    This is YOUR journey...
    You decide your path....
    it doesn't have to be straight and narrow, there can be many lessons along the side roads.
    As long as your end focus is the same, it's all a part of YOUR journey.
    You'll get there because you want to.
    Chin up Starling... this isn't a race... but your journey.
    Love and LIght xxoo
    Starling12 likes this.

  30. #30
    triphippie is offline Banned
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    Dec 2015
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    Hey Starling!

    Thought I would pop in, say hello, and support you. You're doing awesome, much better than you give yourself credit for. Remember that.

    Don't beat yourself up because you took an extra dose. It happens, I've done it as well, a couple of times during my taper, when things got too intorelable. In my experience it doesn't set you back, as long as you get back on your scheduled dose the next day, you'll be fine.

    I have a question for you, what's your experience with Clonidine? Does it help alot or...? I've considered getting a hold of some, but would like to know how well they work, before I go ahead.
    Starling12 and ItsPossible like this.

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