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  1. #1
    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    Hello. I've been around here lurking for some time now. I have fully committed myself to getting clean and hopefully starting suboxone. I've kicked around the idea of using Tramadol to help with the withdrawals but I feel like that is too dangerous and I should really do things the right way. BUT i'm nervous as hell and don't even know where to start...I've looked up doctors in my area, i've checked to make sure my insurance covers it, and i'm just so nervous that I won't find a DR that prescribes suboxone. I've looked up NA meetings in my area b/c i realize that suboxone alone will not keep me clean. Anyone that can offer me some advice or things to expect with the SUBs if i get on them, would be very much appreciate. I'm so nervous but hopeful. Anyone out there???

  2. #2
    Jgray19896 is offline Member
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    Well hello. I just found this post shortly after you welcomed me. Now that I'm able to see a bit of your story I must say you shouldn't be afraid of subs. Everyone has their views and opinions and mine is no different, it is just an opinion. Subs opened the door for me to get off of pain pills. It helps you take your mind off of finding your next fix or being good for the morning or impatiently waiting in a parking lot somewhere for someone you never met to show up and hopefully not screw you over. The first day I started subs was a little awkward but the next day I felt like a new person. I had my life back under control and was happy about the future. Just know if you take that step have a good plan in place. That was my mistake. I jumped ship with no plan. Breaking doses with my fingers or cutting strips with a knife depending on what type I got that month. Take the same dose every day. Preferabley 1 dose to get you out of that re dose mentality and then have a good taper plan in place. If you can do that I have no doubt you can be clean with very minimum discomfort. You have me and this community to have your back and cheer you on. You can do this!
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    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    I guess i should add a little bit about my addiction. I've been a steady user for about three years. I feel like the last few months have been my worst. Well, i don't feel like, i know. I am currently taking between 180-210 mg of oxycodone a day. I am scared as hell of withdrawals, as i would assume most are. I am also concerned that it will be recommended that i go through detox? is that a possibility? I don't know if there is a limit of what doctors will do outpatient for?? I've read many different posts...some people are on much lower doses, and others are on much higher. insight?

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    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    Thank you so much, Jgray for answering me! What do you mean by a plan? Won't the doctor give me a tapering schedule to follow? My brother gave me some subs that he got from a friend but i'm nervous and want to do this with a professional. LOL . sounds ironic, i know. I mean i have no problem abusing my body daily with this stuff but i'm nervous to take something that will help me get better. Also, what was awkward about your first day? Everything you said in your post is spot on. The morning dose, waiting for people in parking lots....the crazy roller coaster. It's horrible. If you don't mind me asking, how long are you clean?

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    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    I'm sorry JGray...i was confusing two threads. sorry for sounding redundent with my questions. I just realized that i confused the two! I'm all over the place.

  6. #6
    Jgray19896 is offline Member
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    It's fine. I also know the feeling of wanting to do it the right way. It's hard to always want to do something perfect and hold yourself to that standard. While i agree having the mindset of wanting to do it right is fantastic just don't dwell on the small details. Like I said in my opinion suboxone is an excellent TOOL to help get clean. It's not a silver bullet to get you off pills but it sure as hell makes a difference. By making a plan all I mean is dont go at it like I did and just start taking a random dose and hope for the best. I had no experience with it prior to my first dose. I had to work my dose out all on my own and find what made me comfortable. I strongly believe that's what made my first day so akward, and by akward i mean feeling mildly uncomfortable as i tried to adjust my dose. I was at work the first day I started it so it was really hard to be in tune with my body and truly separate the feelings of work pains and possible withdrawl symptoms. Also yes, if you find a good doctor with your best interest in mind he will set you up with a solid taper. I don't want to frighten you but good doctors can be hard to come by. Idk if in your previous forum lurking you have come across the Roberts taper plan but it has to be hands down the most recognized taper on the internet and I strongly belive if you unfortunately don't find a solid doctor who wants you to taper that you would have a lot of success with Roberts taper. You should still get your subs legitimately but if the doc isn't on your side about a taper then ask some of the pros here for his taper method. Whatever you do though do not take a sub too soon after taking your last pain pill. You will not be happy. Some people say 24 hours but I was able to do it after 12. Everyone is different just be very careful please. I have been clean for almost a year. It will be a year next month

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    Jgray19896 is offline Member
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    I'm am by no means a doctor so please take everything i say with a grain of salt. Yes people can be lower and higher than that dose but I strongly belive you would not have to detox. Just don't take the suboxone too soon. The pros here could give you a solid induction process for subs. They can make it so you feel little to no discomfort when switching over. Just belive in the process. I have been where you are at with so many questions and just wanting to know everything will be ok and it will as long as you keep your eyes on the end goal. Just talking to you for this small amount of time I can tell you are ready to start the process. Hold on to that feeling till an experienced member gives you a solid induction process.

  8. #8
    ChiefChe is offline Senior Member
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    Hi Shimmy-

    Welcome & I'm glad you made it to this point. You are in the right place to get your journey going. I have no personal experience with subs but others here have & they will be along shortly.

    I can relate to all the behaviors u listed. Counting pills, recounting, parking lots, getting a script & running out weeks before a new one, & forced w/d's. All of the above & more.

    Your plan is more or less your road map. Having a plan mapped out will assist you with staying on track, especially if you go the sub route.

    You're spot on about the Tramodol- stay away! I don't have personal experience with these either but have read enough to know that they're a bad deal & harder to get off of.

    I jumped from about 80-120mg daily Roxy for over 3 years. It was rough but not impossible. If you really want this then don't be afraid of the work ahead.

    Breaking the chains is the most rewarding thing you can do for yourself.

    Get yourself settled in & the pros will visit you shortly.

    Luv & Light,

    ~CC
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  9. #9
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shimmy7 View Post
    I guess i should add a little bit about my addiction. I've been a steady user for about three years. I feel like the last few months have been my worst. Well, i don't feel like, i know. I am currently taking between 180-210 mg of oxycodone a day. I am scared as hell of withdrawals, as i would assume most are. I am also concerned that it will be recommended that i go through detox? is that a possibility? I don't know if there is a limit of what doctors will do outpatient for?? I've read many different posts...some people are on much lower doses, and others are on much higher. insight?


    Hi Shimmy, welcome to the forum!

    Jgray is absolutely correct, Subxone is only a tool to help you get clean and nothing more. It isn't a cure-all or magic formula. It's another very strong opiate, albeit a partial agonist so no high or euphoria. And it should be the very LAST choice made when one wants to be clean and free of all drugs. Trying to taper the drug of choice or going cold turkey should first be attempted, maybe multiple times before using Suboxone. If all other methods fail then Suboxone may be right for you.

    So I would try to taper the Oxy and if you just can't do it then perhaps CT is the way to go for you? Sure you'll have rough symptoms for about a week but then the days get better and better. The 2nd through the 4th days are usually the worst of it. There are many vitamins and supplements, along with some prescription meds from your doctor that will help you get through it. Think about those ways carefully before deciding on Suboxone.

    Now I did use Suboxone, after relapsing many, many times. Then tried Methadone. Bad, BAD decison on my part. Liquid handcuffs is a great name for it. That stuff nearly destroyed me inside and out. I was on it for years and taking 200+mgs per day. I tapered it down and switched to Suboxone and for me that was the best decision. Spent some time on the subs to clear my head and tapered off. I now have 3+ years clean. So you can certainly do it too.

    I was also taking Tramadol and was just as addicted to that as I was everything else. It's now a Schedule 4 narcotic and bad news for most people. Stay away from it is my suggestion.

    Please understand if Suboxone is your choice that most doctors don't really understand this drug. All they need to do is take a simple 8 hour course adn that's it, they can then begin prescribing it to patients. Pharma reps suggest they place unsuspecting patients on huge doses, between 8mg and up to 32mg per day, and attempt to keep patients on it for years, including the rest of the patients life in many cases. And they certainly don't know how to properly taper someone off Suboxone either. It's an extremely strong and powerful drug with a very long half life.

    But you should get the Suboxone from a licensed doctor. Google Suboxone doctors in your area and I'm sure you'll find one that's taking new patients. Your goal is to go in and get as many subs as he or she will give you and get out. Then come here and we can get you safely on and off them. If the doctor inducts you on a very high dose in the office try not to worry as we can get the dose down quickly without harsh symptoms. I promise you that. Don't mention this forum either. Get your script and let us know how it went.

    Most here that have gotten on and off Suboxone successfully have used Robert's Sub Therapy Plan to do it. This plan has produced thousands of success stories here and I'm certainly one of them. Here's the link to the plan below as Jgray previously mentioned....

    https://www.drugs.com/forum/suboxone...apy-66109.html

    Read through it carefully so that you understand it completely. If you follow it closely you'll be very happy you did. The INDUCTION is the most critical part of using subs. You must do it the right way the first time. Don't use "time" as an indicator of when it's safe to take the sub, instead use what is called the Cows (clinical opiate withdrawal scale). The Cows assigns numbers to different wd symptoms. Once you hit an honest score of 26 or higher you know it's safe to take the sub. If you take the sub too soon you'll be sorry you did as you'll most likely go into precipitated wd's (PWD's) which will make you think you're dying you'll be so sick. Avoid that chance by using the Cows.

    Here's. the link to the Cows.....
    https://www.drugabuse.gov/sites/defa...rawalScale.pdf

    A correct induction will have you taking small amounts of Suboxone every hour until you're stable. The goal is to build up the dose slowly and not take a large dose at once. Suboxone is different than other opiates in that the less you take the better you'll feel. A little sub goes a long way. Most are completely stable on 2mg to 6mg of sub.

    Hope this helps. Think it over carefully. I would try CT'ing the Oxy first and if that doesn't work then maybe the Suboxone is right. Help and support is here no matter how you do this. Take care and I'll check back soon.

    Randy
    Last edited by Anonymous; 12-13-2017 at 07:38 PM.
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  10. #10
    Jgray19896 is offline Member
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    These guys are the pros. Anything thing I may have said that contradicts this please disregard. These guys know what they are doing and you can take comfort in knowing they have helped several people from all different kinds of doses of all different kinds of drugs get clean and live sober fulfilling lives. They truly care. Please post your progress so we can help you along the way. They will get you clean and I will keep your head up when times are tough. I wish you all the luck and stay motivated!

  11. #11
    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    Randy, your reply literally brought me so much hope. Thank you. I have been reading these posts for quite some time. I've hated everything about what i've been doing for a while now...using and coming up with stories as to why i had to run out or not able to make it somewhere. I know i'm lucky and haven't had horrible consequences like the ones i've read. Besides spending A LOT of money, i'm pretty much only hurting myself at this point. I am disappointed in myself and want to do better. I started making calls today. So far i haven't been successful but there are a ton of numbers left to call. I've tried to CT. I will give a lot of thought to what you said, though. I've read Robert's taper as well and will read it again. I am so grateful for the people in here. I don't feel as alone and that's a beautiful thing. The only person that knows about my situation is my brother. He is a >>>>>> addict and has been urging me every day to stop and not let my addiction progress to where he is....I don't think my mother could handle it if she knew i was using too. it's not like we're children...i need to get my life back on track. I'm very fortunate that i'm off for the next month to really concentrate on this.

    JGray....it's awesome knowing that you're rooting for me too! if i can offer a ear, or anything else, i'm here.
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  12. #12
    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    If you don't mind me asking, do you do NA meetings or anything like that?

  13. #13
    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    i applaud you for being able to jump on your own! all of these behaviors are real downers. it's funny how i think that it's just me...but none of us are unique, the addiction is pretty much the same for all of us.

  14. #14
    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    Hey Robert, just a little update: a doctor called me back today. We spoke for about ten minutes but i couldn't really talk as i was out and about. She told me to cut down as much as i can over the next week. The plan is to go in to see her on Tuesday, but i may see if she can do Monday as i have a previous engagement that i scheduled months ago! As of now, my appointment is for 2pm and i'm not sure how i will feel later that night. i have no clue what to expect after my induction ( I think that's what it's called??). I felt good after speaking to her. She asked questions about my usage and why i want to stop. she also stressed how important it is to come in to see her SICK. She said to take NOTHING for 24 hours and will examine me before administering Suboxone. I'm assuming she's referring to the COWS worksheet?? She did say that i can take Xanax if i need to during my 24 hours but that while on Suboxone, i should not take it. Does that sound right...that i can take the X if i need to while waiting for the Sub??? I have a script for Xanax but i'm fine not taking them while on Sub. I don't take them much anyway. I'm nervous, excited, but most importantly, hopeful!! I want to start this upcoming school year better than I left in June, but still a work in progress
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  15. #15
    Jgray19896 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shimmy7 View Post
    Hey Robert, just a little update: a doctor called me back today. We spoke for about ten minutes but i couldn't really talk as i was out and about. She told me to cut down as much as i can over the next week. The plan is to go in to see her on Tuesday, but i may see if she can do Monday as i have a previous engagement that i scheduled months ago! As of now, my appointment is for 2pm and i'm not sure how i will feel later that night. i have no clue what to expect after my induction ( I think that's what it's called??). I felt good after speaking to her. She asked questions about my usage and why i want to stop. she also stressed how important it is to come in to see her SICK. She said to take NOTHING for 24 hours and will examine me before administering Suboxone. I'm assuming she's referring to the COWS worksheet?? She did say that i can take Xanax if i need to during my 24 hours but that while on Suboxone, i should not take it. Does that sound right...that i can take the X if i need to while waiting for the Sub??? I have a script for Xanax but i'm fine not taking them while on Sub. I don't take them much anyway. I'm nervous, excited, but most importantly, hopeful!! I want to start this upcoming school year better than I left in June, but still a work in progress
    That's excellent news that you have got the ball rolling. At this point ill give you my opinions of what I have studied up on but I'll leave the real advice to the professionals. So my opinions based off of research is that you don't really want to mix Benzos (Xanax, clonapine And others) with any kind of opiate. Reason being is it's a CNS depressant and that mixed with opiates could potentially make you stop breathing when you fall asleep. Now I have once or twice taken a Xanax at a very very low dose to get to sleep and haven't had an issue but I would strongly advise against mixing Benzos and opiates. Better safe than sorry in my opinion. Like I said take the advice of the professionals and you will have an excellent shot at this process. Keep your head up and keep posting your progress!!

  16. #16
    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Randy35 View Post
    Hi Shimmy, welcome to the forum!

    Jgray is absolutely correct, Subxone is only a tool to help you get clean and nothing more. It isn't a cure-all or magic formula. It's another very strong opiate, albeit a partial agonist so no high or euphoria. And it should be the very LAST choice made when one wants to be clean and free of all drugs. Trying to taper the drug of choice or going cold turkey should first be attempted, maybe multiple times before using Suboxone. If all other methods fail then Suboxone may be right for you.

    So I would try to taper the Oxy and if you just can't do it then perhaps CT is the way to go for you? Sure you'll have rough symptoms for about a week but then the days get better and better. The 2nd through the 4th days are usually the worst of it. There are many vitamins and supplements, along with some prescription meds from your doctor that will help you get through it. Think about those ways carefully before deciding on Suboxone.

    Now I did use Suboxone, after relapsing many, many times. Then tried Methadone. Bad, BAD decison on my part. Liquid handcuffs is a great name for it. That stuff nearly destroyed me inside and out. I was on it for years and taking 200+mgs per day. I tapered it down and switched to Suboxone and for me that was the best decision. Spent some time on the subs to clear my head and tapered off. I now have 3+ years clean. So you can certainly do it too.

    I was also taking Tramadol and was just as addicted to that as I was everything else. It's now a Schedule 4 narcotic and bad news for most people. Stay away from it is my suggestion.

    Please understand if Suboxone is your choice that most doctors don't really understand this drug. All they need to do is take a simple 8 hour course adn that's it, they can then begin prescribing it to patients. Pharma reps suggest they place unsuspecting patients on huge doses, between 8mg and up to 32mg per day, and attempt to keep patients on it for years, including the rest of the patients life in many cases. And they certainly don't know how to properly taper someone off Suboxone either. It's an extremely strong and powerful drug with a very long half life.

    But you should get the Suboxone from a licensed doctor. Google Suboxone doctors in your area and I'm sure you'll find one that's taking new patients. Your goal is to go in and get as many subs as he or she will give you and get out. Then come here and we can get you safely on and off them. If the doctor inducts you on a very high dose in the office try not to worry as we can get the dose down quickly without harsh symptoms. I promise you that. Don't mention this forum either. Get your script and let us know how it went.

    Most here that have gotten on and off Suboxone successfully have used Robert's Sub Therapy Plan to do it. This plan has produced thousands of success stories here and I'm certainly one of them. Here's the link to the plan below as Jgray previously mentioned....

    http://www.drugs.com/forum/suboxone-...apy-66109.html

    Read through it carefully so that you understand it completely. If you follow it closely you'll be very happy you did. The INDUCTION is the most critical part of using subs. You must do it the right way the first time. Don't use "time" as an indicator of when it's safe to take the sub, instead use what is called the Cows (clinical opiate withdrawal scale). The Cows assigns numbers to different wd symptoms. Once you hit an honest score of 26 or higher you know it's safe to take the sub. If you take the sub too soon you'll be sorry you did as you'll most likely go into precipitated wd's (PWD's) which will make you think you're dying you'll be so sick. Avoid that chance by using the Cows.

    Here's. the link to the Cows.....
    https://www.drugabuse.gov/sites/defa...rawalScale.pdf

    A correct induction will have you taking small amounts of Suboxone every hour until you're stable. The goal is to build up the dose slowly and not take a large dose at once. Suboxone is different than other opiates in that the less you take the better you'll feel. A little sub goes a long way. Most are completely stable on 2mg to 6mg of sub.

    Hope this helps. Think it over carefully. I would try CT'ing the Oxy first and if that doesn't work then maybe the Suboxone is right. Help and support is here no matter how you do this. Take care and I'll check back soon.

    Randy
    Hey Randy,
    I thought about what you said, and i really feel that the Suboxone is the right choice for me at this point. I have never wanted something so bad before. I need off of these things. I have been doing a LOT of reading the last few days. i don't want to walk into that apt and come off as a know it all. LOL. I want to know how much she plans of starting me at so that i can let you guys know, if possible. I'm pretty sure she is inducting me on her own. i'm so all over the place. Sometimes i don't know who I've responded to b/c i'm reading so much. Sorry if i get confusing or repeat myself. I am going to my first meeting tonight, well the first meeting i'm going to for myself. I've been to many. I'm super nervous for withdrawing on Monday and knowing that that's it...not so much the physical as the mental. I read somewhere to look at it as a transformation to the new me.

    Hopeful.

  17. #17
    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    Tonight i went to what i thought would be my first NA meeting. It's on the other side of the island from where i live and not in the best neighborhood. I had someone offer to come with me but felt like I needed to do this alone. I cried a little bit on the way...not really sure why...maybe the disappointment i've had in myself lately, maybe saying goodbye to the only thing i've known for so long or just maybe b/c i'm realizing that doing this my way does not always work for me. I pulled up and the church looked like it was totally abandoned. After walking around it, i noticed that there were no handles or door knobs on the doors. I asked some woman that was getting her mail if the church was still in use. She said no and that it had been closed for a while. I huffed and puffed and got back in my car. I looked up meetings in my area and on both sites that i checked, that address was there!! I called the NA number on one of the pages. A super nice lady named Maureen told me that that meeting was no longer available. Apparently the site i went to was not the real NA site. Maureen informed me that you have to check a site that ends in .ORG. I was so upset....like seriously, i can't even get a meeting right!! I told her how this would have been my first meeting for myself. She was so happy for me and had nothing but positive and encouraging words. We talked for a little bit and i joked that i just had my first meeting and I hope she got something out of it too. Just talking to her made me feel better. Even though i'm down and out right now, i am so encouraged by complete strangers. i can't stress it enough.

    I also spoke to my suboxone doctor again tonight. I was under the impression that she was going to dose me in her office b/c that's the way she made it sound. She said she evaluates me and then gives me the script to have filled. i'm super nervous about that!!! i'm going to be REALLY sick. I don't know how i'm going to be able to walk into the pharmacy to pick it up!! That has me a nervous wreck. I told her that i'm usually in rough shape by the 15th hour. I'm not the first person to do this...i know that. anyone have any experience with this. i know we are all different but how did you get through the 24 and THEN go to the pharmacy?? She said i have to be the one to pick it up. i'm stressed. Anyone have anything to share????

  18. #18
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shimmy7 View Post
    Tonight i went to what i thought would be my first NA meeting. It's on the other side of the island from where i live and not in the best neighborhood. I had someone offer to come with me but felt like I needed to do this alone. I cried a little bit on the way...not really sure why...maybe the disappointment i've had in myself lately, maybe saying goodbye to the only thing i've known for so long or just maybe b/c i'm realizing that doing this my way does not always work for me. I pulled up and the church looked like it was totally abandoned. After walking around it, i noticed that there were no handles or door knobs on the doors. I asked some woman that was getting her mail if the church was still in use. She said no and that it had been closed for a while. I huffed and puffed and got back in my car. I looked up meetings in my area and on both sites that i checked, that address was there!! I called the NA number on one of the pages. A super nice lady named Maureen told me that that meeting was no longer available. Apparently the site i went to was not the real NA site. Maureen informed me that you have to check a site that ends in .ORG. I was so upset....like seriously, i can't even get a meeting right!! I told her how this would have been my first meeting for myself. She was so happy for me and had nothing but positive and encouraging words. We talked for a little bit and i joked that i just had my first meeting and I hope she got something out of it too. Just talking to her made me feel better. Even though i'm down and out right now, i am so encouraged by complete strangers. i can't stress it enough.

    I also spoke to my suboxone doctor again tonight. I was under the impression that she was going to dose me in her office b/c that's the way she made it sound. She said she evaluates me and then gives me the script to have filled. i'm super nervous about that!!! i'm going to be REALLY sick. I don't know how i'm going to be able to walk into the pharmacy to pick it up!! That has me a nervous wreck. I told her that i'm usually in rough shape by the 15th hour. I'm not the first person to do this...i know that. anyone have any experience with this. i know we are all different but how did you get through the 24 and THEN go to the pharmacy?? She said i have to be the one to pick it up. i'm stressed. Anyone have anything to share????


    Hi Shimmy -

    Please, please, please stick to just one (1) thread. It can get VERY confusing if a member has more than one thread going at the same time. It get s frustrating posting on one thread only to see others posting on another. Please understand I'm NOT trying to sound or be mean. Just continue to post on THIS thread and not the other one. If you no longer post on the other thread it will slowly disappear into the archives. Thank you so much.

    As for being sick in wd's waiting to induct and going to the pharmacy to get your meds. Most of us have done it and so can you. Believe it or not, but the pharmacist's and techs have seen it before. They've seen people in wd's getting their very first script of Suboxone and most of them understand how it is. Some don't, but most do.

    Another thing is that when you walk out the door of your home and on your way to the pharmacy you'll instantly feel better because in your head you'll know you'll be feeling better real soon when you take the sub. It's a mental thing. When I was heavily addicted to narcotics and ran out early the wd's would hit hard. I would be miserable and so sick from not having my drugs. As soon as I knew there was a script called in or I had one in my hands and on the way to the pharmacy I INSTANTLY felt better! Make sense? So don't worry right now about how sick you'll be, just go to the doctor, get that script, and get to the pharmacy. Everything will be fine I assure you.

    Of course you'll be getting sicker and sicker, that's the goal of induction to subs. Everyone has to deal with it. I certainly did. Just make certain you use that Cows and score your wd symptoms honestly and accurately. Once your added score reaches 26 or higher then you know it's safe to take that first dose of sub. Just follow Robert's sub therapy plan and you'll do great. Induct on small doses every hour until stable. DO NOT take a large dose at once hoping to feel better faster. That defeats the purpose of being on sub. Suboxone is a "less is more" drug meaning the LESS you take the better you'll feel.

    Speaking about your first NA experience. I'm so sorry that happened, it did to me too, more than once. Just find another and go. Don't rule out AA either. Same kind of support just a different drug. Same 12 steps. I actually prefer AA to NA myself, but I do go to both and a sponsor in NA. I mostly work with Suboxone users. If the first meeting you attend, or the second doesn't "feel" right for you then find another until it does feel right. Don't give up. You don't have to say anything either. In fact it's best to sit and listen to what's being discussed at your first couple meetings. Only when you feel comfortable talking you can do so. Try and speak with others outside the meeting to get an idea of what may happen inside. It's scary the first time, but I've met so many good, clean friends there. You will too.

    One other thing....when you do find a meeting that's right for you don't mention that you're on Suboxone. Some people claim they are "clean" on Suboxone and that's just not true because it's a powerful opiate, although it's a partial-agonist. Some in those meetings look down on those that take subs. It stinks, but it happens, and happens often. If you're ever asked what is your drug of choice just simply reply "anything addictive" and let it go at that.

    Let us know how it goes at the doctor and how many subs you get. Post and post often so we have a firm graps on your situation.

    Randy

  19. #19
    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    New York
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    Quote Originally Posted by Randy35 View Post
    Hi Shimmy -

    Please, please, please stick to just one (1) thread. It can get VERY confusing if a member has more than one thread going at the same time. It get s frustrating posting on one thread only to see others posting on another. Please understand I'm NOT trying to sound or be mean. Just continue to post on THIS thread and not the other one. If you no longer post on the other thread it will slowly disappear into the archives. Thank you so much.

    As for being sick in wd's waiting to induct and going to the pharmacy to get your meds. Most of us have done it and so can you. Believe it or not, but the pharmacist's and techs have seen it before. They've seen people in wd's getting their very first script of Suboxone and most of them understand how it is. Some don't, but most do.

    Another thing is that when you walk out the door of your home and on your way to the pharmacy you'll instantly feel better because in your head you'll know you'll be feeling better real soon when you take the sub. It's a mental thing. When I was heavily addicted to narcotics and ran out early the wd's would hit hard. I would be miserable and so sick from not having my drugs. As soon as I knew there was a script called in or I had one in my hands and on the way to the pharmacy I INSTANTLY felt better! Make sense? So don't worry right now about how sick you'll be, just go to the doctor, get that script, and get to the pharmacy. Everything will be fine I assure you.

    Of course you'll be getting sicker and sicker, that's the goal of induction to subs. Everyone has to deal with it. I certainly did. Just make certain you use that Cows and score your wd symptoms honestly and accurately. Once your added score reaches 26 or higher then you know it's safe to take that first dose of sub. Just follow Robert's sub therapy plan and you'll do great. Induct on small doses every hour until stable. DO NOT take a large dose at once hoping to feel better faster. That defeats the purpose of being on sub. Suboxone is a "less is more" drug meaning the LESS you take the better you'll feel.

    Speaking about your first NA experience. I'm so sorry that happened, it did to me too, more than once. Just find another and go. Don't rule out AA either. Same kind of support just a different drug. Same 12 steps. I actually prefer AA to NA myself, but I do go to both and a sponsor in NA. I mostly work with Suboxone users. If the first meeting you attend, or the second doesn't "feel" right for you then find another until it does feel right. Don't give up. You don't have to say anything either. In fact it's best to sit and listen to what's being discussed at your first couple meetings. Only when you feel comfortable talking you can do so. Try and speak with others outside the meeting to get an idea of what may happen inside. It's scary the first time, but I've met so many good, clean friends there. You will too.

    One other thing....when you do find a meeting that's right for you don't mention that you're on Suboxone. Some people claim they are "clean" on Suboxone and that's just not true because it's a powerful opiate, although it's a partial-agonist. Some in those meetings look down on those that take subs. It stinks, but it happens, and happens often. If you're ever asked what is your drug of choice just simply reply "anything addictive" and let it go at that.

    Let us know how it goes at the doctor and how many subs you get. Post and post often so we have a firm graps on your situation.

    Randy
    Thanks for getting back to me, Randy. Sorry about the confusion. I keep telling myself that i'm not unique and people have gone through a hell of a lot more than i have and i can do this too! I have those visions of me vomiting all over CVS. HA! My cousin is going to print out the COWS worksheet and use it as well. The doctor is going to examine me too. I'm so scared of PWD that i'm going to be hyper vigilant with it. I promise. I'll also post on here leading up to my apt that day. I thought about that too: am i really clean if i'm on Suboxone??? That question has crossed my mind MANY times. My intention is to be clean eventually. This is just a tool to help me get there with a taper. I'm so afraid of using that i need the Suboxone to help me stay "straight" for a short period of time and get myself organized. I really want to start this school year as the best me that i can!! I've always been a functioning addict and i'm pretty sure that no one at work would suspect for one minute that I've been using. I get to work an hour early every day and work hard. I just need to do it with a clear head. Thanks for that tip. I won't mention it to anyone. I have the correct website to use from now on as well. My best friend is visiting from out of town this weekend and i'm hoping to stay busy enough that i'm not feeling sorry for myself. She is not an addict. I'm happy to say that no one in my close circle of friends use anything either. Thank god for that b/c i know the "people, places and things" idea and that makes a LOT of sense.
    **I kind of smiled when you mentioned that about once i have the script in my hand i'll feel better. That has always been the case when i'm out of pills but then i pick them up. Just having them on me offered so much relief. I'm sure you're right and the Subs will be the same way. I appreciate you, Randy, I really do. I have met some great people here. I would say you have no idea how much you guys help, but as addict i know you do! Have a great day
    Susan
    Ming23 likes this.

  20. #20
    conwaycreek is offline Member
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    Hey Shimmy,

    Just wanted to stop in and give you some words of encouragement. I'll be thinking of you today as you push through to the next step. And, you will do it. You CAN do it and you will, I just know it.

    Don't worry about what others think right now! I know that sounds easily said, and it is, but really the only important thing in your life right now is you...so don't worry or even pay attention to those around you whose opinions you might otherwise care about. Plus, even though WE know why we're suffering, on the outside we just look like we have the flu!

    What you're doing today and in the next few days is a very important part of taking your life back. Focus on the good that is around the corner, and hopefully that will help you endure the bad of the moment. Also, I can readily agree with Randy about how once you know relief is around the corner then you'll begin to feel better immediately. It wouldn't surprise me if the body releases some endorphins or something in anticipation of a dose, even when that does is a Sub.

    I'm really proud of you! Building up the courage to take these steps is NOT easy. Reach out if you want, I'm on/off here all day!

    -CC

  21. #21
    Shimmy7 is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by conwaycreek View Post
    Hey Shimmy,

    Just wanted to stop in and give you some words of encouragement. I'll be thinking of you today as you push through to the next step. And, you will do it. You CAN do it and you will, I just know it.

    Don't worry about what others think right now! I know that sounds easily said, and it is, but really the only important thing in your life right now is you...so don't worry or even pay attention to those around you whose opinions you might otherwise care about. Plus, even though WE know why we're suffering, on the outside we just look like we have the flu!

    What you're doing today and in the next few days is a very important part of taking your life back. Focus on the good that is around the corner, and hopefully that will help you endure the bad of the moment. Also, I can readily agree with Randy about how once you know relief is around the corner then you'll begin to feel better immediately. It wouldn't surprise me if the body releases some endorphins or something in anticipation of a dose, even when that does is a Sub.

    I'm really proud of you! Building up the courage to take these steps is NOT easy. Reach out if you want, I'm on/off here all day!

    -CC
    Thanks CC. I have am embarking on my first 24 hours without Oxy. I'm nervous. Been crying on and off and have a lot of anxiety. My cousin is coming over in a few hours and will stay overnight with me and take me to my appointment tomorrow. The DR is not dosing me in her office like i thought...i think i mentioned this earlier, not sure. i'm just going to keep myself busy and go for a few walks. Later on tonight, i'll try to keep my mind busy by reading, talking to her and maybe catch some movies. I'll most likely be on her too. I hope you're having a good day and all is going well with your taper. What are you up to today with the taper? Sending good vibes.

    Shimmy

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