Results 1 to 10 of 10
Like Tree7Likes
  • 2 Post By alexnt
  • 2 Post By Lostmommyx3
  • 1 Post By Iluv2smile
  • 2 Post By Lostmommyx3
*PLEASE HELP* Need to figure this out by morning/Soboxon Therapy or Rehab?
  1. #1
    Lostmommyx3 is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    7

    Exclamation *PLEASE HELP* Need to figure this out by morning/Soboxon Therapy or Rehab?

    I really need some advice. I've been going over this all day in my head and am not sure what to do. I recently came clean with my parents that I've been taking Subutex for 7 months (I'm 28 years old) because I have a 3 year old son and have been planning to move home to catch up financially but know my mom would kick me out if she found out while I was there. I was seeing a doctor for maintenance for 3 months, then I was unable to get a ride to my appointments so my sons father (we are now broken up because he relapsed) was giving it to me. Well I decided to go back to a doctor to do things the right way again and was honest with them about me taking it without a precription. I only take 1-2mg a day, sometimes up to 3mg but that's the max. I was addicted to painpills for 3 years prior and went to rehab.

    Well my mom pretty much lost it. She said that I'm going to ruin my life if I go on a program because getting off is going to be worse than anything I've been through. I do know what my tolerance went up after 6 months, as I started w. just 0.5mg and that really did help to keep my mind in order. I have depression and anxiety and after rehab I was a mess. I told my mom that it's been helping me get my life together and she basically said that's bull>>>>, that I want to get high.

    I do see what she means because I have been home for 7 months and my car is still not on the road, I'm still behind financially a lot, my rent is still behind by a few months, but my house is clean and I'm happier than I've ever been. She thinks I should go to a rehab, actually complete the program, and then just live life. I understand where she's coming from but it's not that easy. I have a doctor appointment in the morning and I'm not sure what to do. I am worried I'll go up to higher dosages and it will be hard to get off, but I also think if I did it the right way I could make my life a good one. I'm so sick of everything being such a mess. I lowered my dose by half while waiting to go to the doctor and I'm already crying all the time and tired. I don't want to go back to how I felt after rehab the last time. I was so depressed I wanted to die, had no energy, my body hurt so bad. Does that ever go away? Please someone help. Do you think going on a program is really going to give me the tool I need to use other tools to change my life for the better or should I just quit while I'm ahead? I did notice that I'm starting to feel a little "spacy" sometimes and have been falling asleep when sitting there more often. In the beginning I had a ton of energy, but that's starting to mellow out. I wish there was a magic pill that could fix this all, and I thought Subutex was, but I'm starting to wonder if my mom and family is right? What do I do??

  2. #2
    alexnt is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    ohio, , .
    Posts
    2,255

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Lostmommyx3 View Post
    I really need some advice. I've been going over this all day in my head and am not sure what to do. I recently came clean with my parents that I've been taking Subutex for 7 months (I'm 28 years old) because I have a 3 year old son and have been planning to move home to catch up financially but know my mom would kick me out if she found out while I was there. I was seeing a doctor for maintenance for 3 months, then I was unable to get a ride to my appointments so my sons father (we are now broken up because he relapsed) was giving it to me. Well I decided to go back to a doctor to do things the right way again and was honest with them about me taking it without a precription. I only take 1-2mg a day, sometimes up to 3mg but that's the max. I was addicted to painpills for 3 years prior and went to rehab.

    Well my mom pretty much lost it. She said that I'm going to ruin my life if I go on a program because getting off is going to be worse than anything I've been through. I do know what my tolerance went up after 6 months, as I started w. just 0.5mg and that really did help to keep my mind in order. I have depression and anxiety and after rehab I was a mess. I told my mom that it's been helping me get my life together and she basically said that's bull>>>>, that I want to get high.

    I do see what she means because I have been home for 7 months and my car is still not on the road, I'm still behind financially a lot, my rent is still behind by a few months, but my house is clean and I'm happier than I've ever been. She thinks I should go to a rehab, actually complete the program, and then just live life. I understand where she's coming from but it's not that easy. I have a doctor appointment in the morning and I'm not sure what to do. I am worried I'll go up to higher dosages and it will be hard to get off, but I also think if I did it the right way I could make my life a good one. I'm so sick of everything being such a mess. I lowered my dose by half while waiting to go to the doctor and I'm already crying all the time and tired. I don't want to go back to how I felt after rehab the last time. I was so depressed I wanted to die, had no energy, my body hurt so bad. Does that ever go away? Please someone help. Do you think going on a program is really going to give me the tool I need to use other tools to change my life for the better or should I just quit while I'm ahead? I did notice that I'm starting to feel a little "spacy" sometimes and have been falling asleep when sitting there more often. In the beginning I had a ton of energy, but that's starting to mellow out. I wish there was a magic pill that could fix this all, and I thought Subutex was, but I'm starting to wonder if my mom and family is right? What do I do??
    If I am reading this right you have been on suboxone a total of 7 months now right. You state that you take 1 to 2 mg a day with 3 mg being the max. Does 2 mg hold you all right if you take that on a regular basis? The thing about subs is you need to get on a daily dose and stick with that instead of flip flopping with your dose if you want to be able to use it as a tool to get yourself clean. If you could see your Dr and use 2 mg a day as a starting point and get stable there you should be able to get stable at 2 mg and then follow the taper plan that many of us have used to become clean. you have to want this as bad as anything you have ever wanted in your life and have to want it for yourself and not to please your mom or anyone else. while 7 months is a bit of a long time to be on subs it is doable especially if you have been on a fairly low dose of 3 mg a day at most. When did you lat use subs and what has been your usual daily dose as of recently? my best wishes to you and hope that you can have your Dr induct you at 2 mg tomorrow and take it from there.

    Alex
    Iwantoff2013 and Iluv2smile like this.

  3. #3
    4kai12 is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Location
    Greenville, New York
    Posts
    8

    Default

    ive been on the program before and got off last yr .im going too my first appt 2mrrow. i think u should go, ask ur mom to go with u so ur doc can explain the program and subs to her. and the dr will wein u off.has she fully researched it? u no u r doing the right thing for u and ur little one. thats awesome. being sick is only going to enable u to relapse.

  4. #4
    4kai12 is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Location
    Greenville, New York
    Posts
    8

    Default

    what was ur decison?

  5. #5
    Lostmommyx3 is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    7

    Default

    Thank you guys for replying. I really appreciate it. Well I ended up going to the doctor and I'm really glad I did because I was really freaking out last night. I hadn't taken any medicine in two days and was starting to remember how I was before taking it- a mess. I definitely agree w. me being off the same dose and same schedule not keeping me stable like I should be. I also think I should really consider going to meetings and doing step work. Have either of you tried that before? I've never done it but I know I'm going to need more tools than just this alone. I was really nervous about how the doctors was going to go but it went awesome.. this was my experience..

    I went in and the staff was EXTREMELY friendly. This place was not a regular doctor but a program type deal that has counseling there, women's program, and a bunch of other tools you can use. I filled out some paperwork and paid $220. That was actually cheap compared to the other prices I was getting, but then the staff said that they will get the insurance company to reimburse me because it's treatment I need. I was really surprised to hear that because I thought they never pay for the appointment. Well anyway, I filled out some paperwork and then went back with the nurse. She was also overly nice, I was like man I'm getting lucky, my doctor is probably going to be mean lol. Well I did a urine and she let me look up my insurance I.D number on her laptop because I didn't have my card with me. She said it didn't matter what was in my urine, which I was happy about because I had taken a xanax the day before because I was freaking out. They explained the danger of taking the two together and that's definitely something I'll be avoiding from now on.

    After she read my urine she said I could go back and see the doctor. For some reason I was surprised to see the doctor was a female. She was SO nice and went over my paperwork. They didn't make me feel any type of way that I've been taking subutex off the street. She did a little exam on me and then said do you know the difference between suboxon and subutex, which I do. I told her that Soboxon made me nauseous when I take it, but I was okay with it either way. I heard they only give Subutex to pregnant women so I didn't think I would be getting that. She said since the Subutex was working for me that she would keep me on that. She then said that she would allow me up to 8MG a day and if I wanted to break it into 4 pieces and take 2MG a day that was fine, but if I ever felt I needed more than 8MG she would increase the dosage. I was really happy she kept me on the Subutex because that works for me, and I was happy she let me decide on my dosage. She was so nice and friendly, the environment overall was really pleasant compared to what I've been reading online.

    Once she filled out the script she asked me if I had a pharmacy, which I do and she said they preferred to use this one specific one. I was a little hesitant because I never used it in the past, but who cares right? She then said she would like to see me in 2 weeks just to make sure everything was going smoothly. She walked me out and had the staff print out a paper on Subutex and then give me directions to the pharmacy. My mom ended up coming with me, and she was even happy. I was and still am most shocked by that. She said the place was really nice and to just do the right thing this time. She said I am still welcome to come home and she just wants to see me do good for me and my son. She even called my dad who was watching my son and told him what a nice place it was. I was so happy. We then went to the pharmacy and I went in, they said they were working on a prior auth for my medicine. Then I waited a few mins and they said it will take until tomorrow to get it, but they were able to get me a 5 day hold, so 5 pills until I could get the full script tomorrow, which was another positive thing. I'll only have to pay $1 for my script which is awesome because I was so worried about not being able to afford it. Then my mom asked me how much my follow up visits were and I called the office. They said since I paid the full $220 today the follow up is FREE of charge, and then I'll pay $50 every 2 months. That is like nothing and definitely I can afford $52 in total every two months for my treatment, including the medication.

    I'm really taking this on like I've never done because, because it is something I want more than I've ever wanted anything in my life. The doctor said that some people need the medication for a few months, while others need it for years. She said that would depend on me, and they weren't going to push me to stop it or stay on it. They really made me feel like I was in control of all of this, not like I was some kinda loser druggie who couldn't handle making a decision, like I thought it would be. I'm so happy I decided to go and thanks for the support here. I'm thankful I found this forum and plan to keep connected with everyone here.
    alexnt and Iluv2smile like this.

  6. #6
    4kai12 is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Location
    Greenville, New York
    Posts
    8

    Default

    YAY! sorry i didnt get back to u right away i wasnt on bc i kinda got discouraged i thought maybe everyone left the forum bc they got clean which would have been awesome for themthat they have moved on from this but horrible for me ,since i pretty much only logged on to get support ,encouragement,advice and opionions from other people that are in my shoes and were in my shoes and were able to beat this thing And to also socialize,give encouragement anad support to others that feel the way i do.!yay congrats!ive been thinking about u hoping ur mom went with u to learn about suboxone!I AM SO HAPPY FOR U. im glad that everything has been falling into place for u, i was sad to read ur mom was so against it but i new if she went with and was able to even talk with ur doc it would help her, just think this is new for ur mom as a non addict. my bf felt the same way,in the begining he sd its like giving a crck head a little bit of coke everyday to keep him from beining a complete fein.its totally awesome how cheap ur appts r, that deff helps our situation bc people in our situation tend to get discouraged bc the apts can be very expensive and some docs want to see their patients once a week to line their already very heavy pockets!wow i did the math it says that a doc can have 99 in my state so if my doc just had her patients only coming in once a month about $9900 a month! disgusting! there deff needs to be more docs like urs !!! n e ways congrats!!

  7. #7
    4kai12 is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Location
    Greenville, New York
    Posts
    8

    Default

    oh and to ur ? about the meetings i havent yet but i need to im not so big on the aa na because i am a private person and feel more comfy talking to a smaller audience,even tho every one here can ready my story.lol. my doc wants me to do counsling or aa/na. so im deff getting some counseling and maybe some na.ive learned with this dependance the physical addiction is only half the problem, the psyche and emotional is just as important if not more important!i kno that just buy being on here helps , reading everyone elses struggles and accomplishments!!!! its nice to have all this support!

  8. #8
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    2,537

    Default

    Wow that is like no suboxone place I have heard of..
    Sounds great!
    The only part that sounds familiar is the doc saying she will raise your dose..
    Now you and your family are on the same page that is awesome..
    I would say go to meetings!
    Find some people you can relate too and you can help each other..
    This disease and these pills and this addiction is not something most normal people will get!
    You may have to go to a few different meeting to find a home group.

    We need to put at least as much energy into our recovery as we did our using..
    We used everyday we should go to a meeting everyday especially in the beginning..

    I don't even know you but one think is for sure!
    We are not getting any younger !
    And it never gets better using!

    So this is all falling in to place for a reason !
    Now it is up to you!
    Go for it!
    Break the cycle before you child may be faced with drug choices..
    Take care
    Please keep posting
    Iluv2
    Iwantoff2013 likes this.

  9. #9
    Lostmommyx3 is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    7

    Default

    Thanks so much for writing back guys! I agree, I was really surprised how things went with the doctor, but am really feeling blessed because I know if I had gone to a detox I'd be getting out soon and I'd be a mess. I think the mental part is so much worse than the physical part for me. I go crazy, and I really don't even want to think about getting off of this yet, but I still have a while to really start and get things together.

    I'm so happy you guys are doing good, and we are all lucky to have this forum to connect with others. It truly is hard to explain addiction to someone who never had it before. It's a scary thing that I wouldn't wish upon anyone!! So far everything has been good, aside from a little nausea at nightime, but I just go to bed when that hits and am going to try and not maybe swallow the medication too early. I didn't get a print out from the pharmacy, so when I go in I'm going to ask for one. My prescription just says "0.6 refills left" I have no idea what that means, but I think tomorrow I'll go and pick it up. What dosage do you guys take, if you don't mind me asking? Did you have to go up?

    I'm so happy this medication is provided for people who are trying to get their lives together. I'm def. going to do meetings, but for me and I'm sure both of you, meetings alone are not enough, especially during the early months. I don't ever want to go back to how I felt during addiction or afterwards, so that's one of he main reasons I won't ever use again.. aside from my son.

    I liked the saying to put as much into meetings as we did into our addiction, that would def. mean all day everyday. I am happy we all have the chance for a better life
    Iwantoff2013 and 4kai12 like this.

  10. #10
    4kai12 is offline New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Location
    Greenville, New York
    Posts
    8

    Default

    hello, glad to hear u r doing good. i havent been able to make it to any meetings, my goal is 2 month.and to get at least one done this month, i live in a very rural town, and my child care is limited,im hoping to find a psycatrist soon this month as welll.im taking 8mg of suboxone but for some reason dont feel too good on it even tho i have taken it on and off for about 1.5 years now. ive been reading that alot of ppl switch to subutech bc of that ,so i am hoping to feel better i dont want to switch i just want to feel better, and begin to taper asap. i kno i cant ruch it tho.ands that is agood saying should use it as a quote!

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22