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Suboxone Home Detox - 2nd Time
  1. #1
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Thumbs up Suboxone Home Detox - 2nd Time

    About a year and a half ago I posted this:

    https://www.drugs.com/forum/suboxone...tml#post450010

    Well, 6 months ago...a little over a year of being clean and suboxone free I relapsed and now I find myself in a similar situation. At least this time I have a job and a rent free place to live. I have been taking anywhere from 1-4 mg of suboxone a day and I am determined to get clean again and chalk this up to a mistake and a learning experience. I mistakenly, like many other addicts, thought I could take a few and it wouldn't hurt me. I was wrong. I was soon trapped into the cycle of getting high to avoid being sick...and it didn't take long.

    First let me say this because some of you here need a little clarification. Although Suboxone is preferable to being addicted any other hard drug, you are still an addict and you still have a problem if you are taking Suboxone. Some people seem to think they are clean if they take Suboxone and that is NOT the case at all.

    That being said, on August the 27th I am taking 8 days off work and I will be detoxing at home again. This time though, I am prepared. I know what to expect and I have armed myself with many items from the Thomas Recipe to help guide me through. I am hoping it will make it a bit easier than last time when I suffered through detox without any meds at all, save Advil. I am also giving my phone to a relative, temp deactivating my Facebook, and only using the internet on a limited basis.

    I will be jumping off from about 2mg per day which is about what I was at last time when I began my detox. I will update my progress every few days for those that are interested. I keep telling myself I did it before, and I can do it again. I am hoping that this will give hope to those who think they cannot jump off or need a bit of inspiration. You don't need to reply to this post if you don't want to. Just please know that I am your normal, everyday "Joe-Schmo". I am 38 years old, business-man type, passive type personality at home, alpha type at work. I have no other health problems to speak of...and if I can do it, you can do it too!! But, you have to make it happen.

    I went to the Dr. to get a couple of Rx's to prepare. I wished so bad that I had these meds last time to help. So this is what I am fortune to be armed with this time around....again most of these are from the Thomas Recipe:

    -Klonopin: I have never been addicted to benzo's...they just don't do it for me. But if it will help me relax and get some sleep then I'm all for it. I will only be using K-pin until the RLS and insommnia subsides a tad, which for me should be around day 8.

    -Lunesta: My emergency go-to sleep aid for the past 10 years or so. I probably have taken 30 in my entire life. I usually only need it when I am very stressed at work. So for this occasion, it will come in handy.

    -L-Tyrosine: I hope this stuff works.

    -One-A-Day Multivitamin

    -Pepto-Bismol

    -Vitamin B-6

    -Epson Salt for bathing: I have never used this before, but I'm going to try it out. A hot bath never hurt anyone.

    -Hylands Restful Leg's: This was #1 on my OTC shopping list. I'm hoping the Tyrosine and baths help ease the RLS, but if not, hopefully this will help out.

    -Advil

    Ok, thats it I think. I'm going to use the Klonopin and the Lunesta on an as needed basis and I am NOT going to mix the two. Hopefully this go around will be a tad easier. Mentally I was good during my last detox. I never got depressed. It was the physical part that affected me mostly, you know, that feeling that you weigh 500 lbs and no energy.

    I work up through the 26th and on the 27th I start my 8 day "vacation" from work. I am going to try to jump off on the 25th to get a head start, so I will be going back to work around day 10 or 11. Last time around I was feeling much better by then...so I am optimistic. I am so ready to get this monkey off my back. Being clean was so great!! Why did I screw it up? Oh well. Here goes nothing.

    I'll be keeping a journal on a day by day basis of my progress and will be posting it in this thread every few days depending on how I feel. I am curious to find out how well the Thomas Recipe works for me, as I know it has helped many others.

    One request for those who may reply...please don't post in this thread that one or more of these items didn't do you any good. I want to keep my motivation and confidence high. If any of these items don't work, I'll know it soon enough.

    Wish me luck!! Talk to you guys soon!

    LesPaulJeff
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  2. #2
    Iwantoff2013 is offline Platinum Member
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    Hey there. I think I remember you

    Yeah, some addicts think they're clean while taking Sub, not realizing it's a partial opiate agonist. Clean is clean, period.

    Just curious -- are you jumping from 2 mg rather than tapering just to get it over with?

    I really do wish you all the best. I used the taper plan and was clean for 17 months starting in Aug of 2014. Then, this last Dec, I relapsed like an idiot. Same as you -- thought I could handle it. As if. Plus I stopped going to meetings and got lazy about my recovery.

    Anyway, sounds like you have a plan. I know you know this -- just be careful with the Klonopin. Enough said.

    Kat
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  3. #3
    Ming23 is offline Platinum Member
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    Hey LesPaul
    I raise the same question as Kat: why jump from such a high dose? Could be a prescription for failure. If it were me, i would taper lower. Sub is Very strong. Even Robert325 got down to .5mg before skipping days. Why do u want to jump from the roof when u can take the stairs?
    Too much discomfort has broken many a strong person's resolve!
    Try to get to a lower dose before jumping.
    Of course, it's always your call but we do want u to succeed!
    Post when u can...
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  4. #4
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iwantoff2013 View Post
    Hey there. I think I remember you



    Just curious -- are you jumping from 2 mg rather than tapering just to get it over with?



    Kat
    Good question.

    The answer is simple. I can't taper, I've tried..its just too hard for me. When I try to take a dose that is lower than the dose I normally take my brain knows it and I start feeling bad. I've tried to taper many, many times but I always wind up going back to my normal dose.

    I am going to attempt to taper the last few days before I jump off, but I have to work right up to the point where I jump off so it's going to be a challenge. I doubt that 1 week worth of tapering will do any good but it's better than nothing.

    Thanks for asking!!

  5. #5
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ming23 View Post
    Hey LesPaul
    Why do u want to jump from the roof when u can take the stairs?


    As I said above, when I taper I feel bad. My brain knows I'm trying to trick it and it stays on my mind all day, I don't feel normal, and my anxiety goes a little bonkers. So, I'd rather feel like total hell for 2 weeks than to taper and feel bad for a month or two. Yea, taking the stairs sounds great, but the stairs are painful to walk down. I'd rather jump and risk a broken leg than to suffer down long, winding flights of stairs.

    You are right. Tapering is ALWAYS the best way. But, for me it just doesn't work, I just don't have the discipline.

  6. #6
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    I remember you too!
    It is good you made it back!

    I could never taper anything
    Except sub..

    You know it is better to get to the lowest dose possible..
    But if you can't
    You can't..

    You have a plan
    And that is 75% of the battle..

    I would suggest you start taking the supplements now!
    Then thry will be already in your system!
    We will be here!
    Bette

  7. #7
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iluv2smile View Post
    I remember you too!
    It is good you made it back!

    I could never taper anything
    Except sub..

    You know it is better to get to the lowest dose possible..
    But if you can't
    You can't..

    You have a plan
    And that is 75% of the battle..

    I would suggest you start taking the supplements now!
    Then thry will be already in your system!
    We will be here!
    Bette
    Thank you! I have a lot of respect for you. You are an active member here and you provide lots of encouragement to others. I've read many of your posts and you seem like you really know whats going on.

    Yea, right now I am pretty much just taking the multivitamins. I'm going to start taking the K-pin and L-Tyrosine when the RLS and insomnia creep in. I hope its much easier than last time but I fully expect to feel like >>>>. I think you have to feel like >>>> for a while so you will realize how good it feels when you start getting better.

    I'm a little embarrassed to be in this situation again. I don't know why I relapsed...I mean, I felt great sober. Its weird how the mind of an addict work and amazing how much opiates and any other drug changes you physically. You are always bargaining with yourself. I can't wait to feel better. The people who I've told my problem to have told me that I look like hell and lost weight. I've dropped about 20 lbs in the 6 months since ive relapsed. I dont mean to brag but I think I'm a pretty handsome guy...but this stuff makes me look terrible. Its hard to tell in the mirror but I know I don't look normal. I've had to tell my co-workers a lie to explain my weight loss. I can't wait to get back to normal.

    Thanks for the message Bette! You've lifted my spirits so much and I appreciate you and all you do.
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  8. #8
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    I just read your story and I gotta say it was encouraging. It sucks you relapsed but lets be awnest man we all have at one point, well most of us. I hope ur jump isn't to hard dude. Stay focused stay on track n remember how it felt to feel everything.

  9. #9
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Hey guys,

    Thought I'd chime in with an update. I'm at the end of day 4. I pretty much feel like poop. I have no energy and no motivation. I know that will subside soon but that's what I am dealing with right now. I have gotten out of the house a few times to get food even though I haven't had much of an appetite...but I can eat some of my favorite fast food items so I'm ok there.

    The only things from the items listed in my OP that I have taken so far are my multivitamins and Klonopin. I think I may have overdid it a bit on the K-pin and that may be adding to my monotony, so starting tomorrow I'm going to slack off on that and see how I do.

    What worries me is that the RLS hasn't sunk in yet at all. No RLS to speak of. I only have 12 days or so to get half way normal before returning to work so I am actually hoping it will come soon but it hasn't showed up yet. Weird. Last time on day 3 or 4 it was settling in nicely but so far (knock on wood) I have had no signs of RLS. Is it b/c I was sober for over a year before I relapsed for those few months. Is it the K-pin I've been taking that is keeping the RLS at bay? Am I just lucky? Or is it just waiting to catch me off guard and get me just when I think things are improving. Hmmm.

    Anyways. Like I said, just checking in. Ill be back in a few days. Waking up, watching tv, and trying to go back to bed is tough, but I'll make it. I'm just praying the RLS leaves me alone and has mercy on me this time around. That was the thing that I fear most.

    Thanks again for all your encouragements!! See you all soon!!
    Last edited by Anonymous; 08-29-2016 at 07:04 PM.
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  10. #10
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Hey again,

    Well, I'm on day 5. I'm feeling quite ok. I'm still bored out of my mind b/c the things I did when I was high on Suboxone aren't half as interesting now. But I'm still worried. I should feel much worse but I don't. I'm just bored with little to no energy. Why dont I feel worse? Does anyone know? I should be in bed wishing for death right about now but I am up snacking on pretzels watching TV. Again, did I get lucky and the withdrawal gods are showing mercy on me??

    Again, the only thing I have been doing is eating a banana every day (even before I jumped off), taking about 1 K-pin a day (which I'm only taking a half of one today) and I forgot to mention above that I'm taking lunesta at bedtime to sleep.

    So far the only symptoms I'm having is chills and no energy. But no RLS, no lack of sleep so far. WTF.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 08-30-2016 at 11:11 AM.

  11. #11
    Danidbo9 is offline Member
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    How much Klonipin do you take? I just got some prescribed from my dr and its .5 3 times a day I'm nervous to take it. Does it really help?

  12. #12
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by LesPaulJeff View Post
    As I said above, when I taper I feel bad. My brain knows I'm trying to trick it and it stays on my mind all day, I don't feel normal, and my anxiety goes a little bonkers. So, I'd rather feel like total hell for 2 weeks than to taper and feel bad for a month or two. Yea, taking the stairs sounds great, but the stairs are painful to walk down. I'd rather jump and risk a broken leg than to suffer down long, winding flights of stairs.

    You are right. Tapering is ALWAYS the best way. But, for me it just doesn't work, I just don't have the discipline.

    Hi Les
    Hi Paul
    Hi Jeff…Lol.

    I can understand your reasoning for not wanting to taper lower. I just wanted to suggest for you and any others reading along in the same position that you don't have to reduce each dose by a "set" amount. Instead of reducing by 25% for example you can drop by 15%, 10%, 5% or even lower amounts if you wish.

    There was one member I was helping taper from the sub and she was having issues dropping each 25% dose. I suggested try reducing by 10% and that made all the difference. She was able to continue her taper and is now off the sub for good!

    Just a thought I wanted to pass on to you. Take care and all the best!

    Randy
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  13. #13
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Danidbo9

    How much Klonipin do you take? I just got some prescribed from my dr and its .5 3 times a day I'm nervous to take it. Does it really help?
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

    (Sorry the quote thing messed up)





    YES it helped me a lot. I have been doing just as your Dr. said. .5 every few hours, then another .5 at bedtime.

    Withdrawal is part mental and part physical and they can intrude on one another. Anxiety makes your physical withdrawal symptoms worse. So K-pin for me has helped a ton!! Just don't over do it. You don't want to turn into a zombie. I recommend taking the K-pin as your Dr prescribed until about day 3 or 4. Then after day 4 only take a .5 dose at bedtime.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 08-30-2016 at 10:07 PM.

  14. #14
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Hey guys.

    Just to update my RLS situation. I think I have had a slight case of RLS for the past day or so. I just passed it off as nervousness or uneasiness from withdrawal.

    I was watching TV and having that weird chilly "ugh" type feeling so I took some Hylands Restful Legs, and bam, I was at ease.

    I remembered from my last detox to avoid caffeine, so I have just been drinking water and gatorade. So that must be why the RLS hasn't came on as strong this time around.

    This is the night of day 5 and I actually feel good. I'm not out of the woods yet and I have my moments. But I have been very active this evening. Again, I'm hoping since I was sober for a year before I relapsed that I may not have it as bad this time around. Almost 2 years ago at day 5 I was in pretty bad shape. This time around I'm managing it quite well.

    Anyways, thanks again for the support. I appreciate those who read this even though you don't reply. Just know this. I am a wimp...I'm a wussy, I'm a regular guy, there's nothing special about me at all. And if I can do it, you have no excuse not to get clean as well.

  15. #15
    Danidbo9 is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by LesPaulJeff View Post
    Danidbo9

    How much Klonipin do you take? I just got some prescribed from my dr and its .5 3 times a day I'm nervous to take it. Does it really help?
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

    (Sorry the quote thing messed up)





    YES it helped me a lot. I have been doing just as your Dr. said. .5 every few hours, then another .5 at bedtime.

    Withdrawal is part mental and part physical and they can intrude on one another. Anxiety makes your physical withdrawal symptoms worse. So K-pin for me has helped a ton!! Just don't over do it. You don't want to turn into a zombie. I recommend taking the K-pin as your Dr prescribed until about day 3 or 4. Then after day 4 only take a .5 dose at bedtime.
    Thanks! Yes I'm holding off on taking it. I was going to use it at bed time only as needed though.

  16. #16
    Pamela4946 is offline New Member
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    Hi everyone been fighting this for twenty years, truly last four years trying to quit I'm on day two 12mg suboxone tomorrow 16mg max ready to throw in the towel again, the fatigue gets me every time I can deal with everything else, sickness, chronic pain, sweats, squirts. Anyway been reading alot(never do). Anyone have some suggestions and your advices on me possibly tapering off subs. (Dr said probably be on rest of life). Look forward to responses ASAP at the end of a long notted rope thanks a ton

  17. #17
    Pamela4946 is offline New Member
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    Me again forgot to emphasise on the fatigue part really important thanks again , I'm fit male 40 yr 5'7 150 lb

  18. #18
    Pamela4946 is offline New Member
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    Question Need help with fatigue on suboxone

    Apologize if you see me asking this question everywhere don't know computers, any who I'm 40yr male struggling 20 yrs pain killers/ herion, tried quiting countless times hope suboxone is for me. So far it's not feel little crapy but can deal with it, I would love some advice for fatigue doe's anyone else suffer I'm on day 2 taking 12 mg Tomorrow 16 mg max dose , ready to throw in the towel again I need to get back to work. Anyone help ASAP?? Thanks and best wishes and prayers and support for all of you going and staying of the opioids y'all should have a name or title not x- junkie something awesome apologize lack of words

  19. #19
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pamela4946 View Post
    Hi everyone been fighting this for twenty years, truly last four years trying to quit I'm on day two 12mg suboxone tomorrow 16mg max ready to throw in the towel again, the fatigue gets me every time I can deal with everything else, sickness, chronic pain, sweats, squirts. Anyway been reading alot(never do). Anyone have some suggestions and your advices on me possibly tapering off subs. (Dr said probably be on rest of life). Look forward to responses ASAP at the end of a long notted rope thanks a ton

    Hey Pamela,

    I saw you asking for me on the other thread. First thing you need to do is begin your own thread. You can use it as your journal to track your progress. This one belongs to another member and that's how we find them. We can ficd you easily on your own thread. Here's the link to beginning a new thread in the Suboxone section below….

    https://www.drugs.com/forum/newthrea...newthread&f=40

    Title your thread and tell us your story there.

    I can you you right now you're on WAY too much sub. !2mg is a WHOPPER of a dose, but 16mg as you plan to take is just outrageous. No one needs that much sub. What I would have you do is to start taking just 8mg total per day. I promise that's plenty of sub for you. I would also split that dose taking 4mg in the am and 4mg in the pm, about 8-10 hours apart.

    You would remain o nthat dose around a week then begin the taper process. The taper works best if you redcue your dose by 25% every 4 or so days. More on that later.

    Get your new thread started and I'll look for it. To find the thread once it's begun just click on your user name and foll ow the prompts.

    Randy

  20. #20
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    Yes Pamala..
    I saw your question on the other thread..
    It can take a few days to stabilize.
    12 mg is wY too much.
    With sub
    When you are on too much .
    It has the opposite effect ..
    You feel like crappppp.

    I would take 8 mg tomorrow ..
    Get stable there..

    Honestly most people feel their best at 2 mg or less.
    But that is a hard concept to grasp
    Less is more.

    You can do this..
    And function while tapering .
    I tapered off sub using the tPer Randy suggested 19 months ago
    And worked through the whole thing.

    I will look for your new thread.
    There are many people on here at various places in their
    Taper or detox!
    This is a great place for support..

    Remember to drink lots of wAter
    Because sub can dehydrate you
    And
    ThT can make you feel terrible..
    Take care
    Bette
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  21. #21
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Exclamation Hey guys i need help!!!

    OK guys look. I need help. I need an educated, experienced answer. I was bragging earlier in the thread about the RLS hasnt set in so far...well it did. Not too bad but it did. RLS is my worst fear.


    My Question: I freaked out and I took one very very small peice of subtex to make it go away (yes I know im an idiot). I took just a small crumb of subtex (I broke it off with my fingernail) It was probably about .25mg or even lower but I feel high. There may not be an exact answer to this question but I'm going to ask it. How far will this set me back??? I am on day 6.


    I hate to be "snippy" here but I have to say this. I have tried to look this info up on the net and every time I see someone ask a question like this the answer is always "It will set you back to day 1, you messed up". Or "You shouldn't have done that, youll have to start all over...so dont do it again". Its like the person answering is just trying to motivate or teach the user a lesson..and then later they don't seem to know what they are talking about or are just trying to sound smart. I don't want or need a lesson or motivation. I am looking for an answer from someone who has done this or knows this situation well.

    I am so sorry to be snippy above. I am just looking for an educated, non-emotional answer to a simple question. I am scared it will set me back to day one and Ill have to start all over again. Please no lectures or random assumptions about what may happen or not. I hate to say it like that but I'm really concerned and I cannot find a real answer on the net besides assumptions, and non-educated guesses.

    Can anyone help!!?? Thanks!! Love you guys!!
    Last edited by Anonymous; 08-31-2016 at 11:10 PM. Reason: Spelling

  22. #22
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Just to follow up on my previous post, I just wanted the readers to know that I have flushed the rest of what I had left. I didn't want anyone to get the idea that I am keeping some "just in case" again. Ive learned my lesson.

    So if anyone has an answer and can help, Id really appreciate it.


    Iwantoff2013, luv2smile or anyone!! Please help ;-)

    Love yall!

  23. #23
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Hey again guys!

    Well its the day after I screwed up and I kind of feel like I picked up where I left off. Mild RLS in the upperbody but I'm ok. Not much motivation but hopefully a few more days and Ill be feeling better.

    Sorry for freaking out last night. I'd still like some input on that though. If you go by how much of the drug leaves your body in x number of days plus what/if you add another dose on x day it can't be near what was inside me when I began my jump. I'm not smart enough to do the math, but just thinking about it made me feel better. Ill beat this >>>> one way or another.

    I go back to work Monday so hopefully by then the uneasiness will be gone.

  24. #24
    Iluv2smile is offline Platinum Member
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    It won't set u back to day 1..
    It can't ..

    You already know what to do
    Just keep doing it.

    Usually what happens when people take a little bit when they had decided not too..
    It is the guilt that gets them..
    You made a mistake ..
    Or not.

    Who knows ?
    But carry n..

    You will be ok!


    Sub is a strange drug.
    The half life is long ..
    So whatever you took that day ..
    Half of it can still be in your system.. 24 hrs later..

    Drink plenty of water .

    You can do this!
    Bette
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  25. #25
    Randy35 is offline Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by LesPaulJeff View Post
    Hey again guys!

    Well its the day after I screwed up and I kind of feel like I picked up where I left off. Mild RLS in the upperbody but I'm ok. Not much motivation but hopefully a few more days and Ill be feeling better.

    Sorry for freaking out last night. I'd still like some input on that though. If you go by how much of the drug leaves your body in x number of days plus what/if you add another dose on x day it can't be near what was inside me when I began my jump. I'm not smart enough to do the math, but just thinking about it made me feel better. Ill beat this >>>> one way or another.

    I go back to work Monday so hopefully by then the uneasiness will be gone.


    You're gonna be ok. Keep moving forward, motivate yourself with exercise. Drink lots of fluids. I agree with Bette that it really isn't going to set you back taking that one-time small dose. If you do it again then perhaps it would.

    The half life thing can be very complicated. I'm a math freak as it's a huge part of my job. I've figured out the half life for different people many times, people I've helped in person through NA or AA, or just friends. I will tell you that a single one-time dose of 1-2mg can remain in a persons system for a month, sometimes longer. YOu may or may not experience wd symptoms after a month, but the sub will still be in the system. Scary.

    Randy
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  26. #26
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Thank you guys!! I've worked so hard this week and I was hoping it wouldn't be all for naught.

    I'll keep pressing forward. Thanks again!! You guys mean a lot to me.
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  27. #27
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
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    Hey guys!

    I'm at the end of day 8 (minus the slip up). I'm doing quite ok I guess. The only problem I am having is that my heart is still beating out of my chest and I have that all too familiar discomforting feeling in my upper body. Kinda like that feeling you get when you take way too much caffeine. The problem is that the only thing that makes it go away is zanaflex, a muscle relaxer...but the zanaflex makes me very groggy and I feel like I weigh 2000 lbs.

    I have been lucky so far and my legs have behaved themselves. The only effects of w/d's I'm having at the moment is that Im very sluggish, no motivation, and the chest discomfort.

    I go back to work Sunday but I may call in depending on how I feel. Hell, I am so bored sitting at home I might go to work just to get up off my butt. I work in retail so I walk a lot and that will help me, but I have customers in my face all day long and that is a challenge sober or high...lol. I walked 3 miles the other day and did great..but the past few days I have been laying around like a knot on a log, like I said its prob due to the zanaflex.

    I am only taking my benzo and lunesta at night to help sleep and it has worked great!! I am getting about 9 hours a night which is MUCH better than last time.

    My chest discomfort should ease up in a day or so according to my journal last time. So I'm looking forward to that.

    I will talk to you guys soon!! Thanks again for all you guys do here!
    Last edited by Anonymous; 09-02-2016 at 11:59 PM.

  28. #28
    Iwantoff2013 is offline Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Location
    So Calif
    Posts
    3,288

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by LesPaulJeff View Post
    Just to follow up on my previous post, I just wanted the readers to know that I have flushed the rest of what I had left. I didn't want anyone to get the idea that I am keeping some "just in case" again. Ive learned my lesson.

    So if anyone has an answer and can help, Id really appreciate it.


    Iwantoff2013, luv2smile or anyone!! Please help ;-)

    Love yall!
    Sorry, just saw this post. No, taking that tiny dose will not set you back to day 1. Like Bette said, it's usually just a matter of feeling weak and guilty for having taken more Sub. Just keep moving forward and you'll be just fine.

    Kat
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  29. #29
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    37

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    Quote Originally Posted by Iwantoff2013 View Post
    Sorry, just saw this post. No, taking that tiny dose will not set you back to day 1. Like Bette said, it's usually just a matter of feeling weak and guilty for having taken more Sub. Just keep moving forward and you'll be just fine.

    Kat
    Thank you ;-) You guys make me feel so much better!

    I dont know why it's been harder mentally this time around. Last time I withdrew it was tougher physically, but mentally I was better. This time is the exact opposite. Maybe it's b/c I know what's coming. Last time I was more "in the dark" so to speak.

    Strange how one's mind works. I was feeling terrible and I could barely get to the fridge and back the other day, but when I was offered that small, small piece...I jumped up, threw on some clothes, got into my truck, and played the drums on my steering wheel while singing the whole way there. Ughh.
    Last edited by Anonymous; 09-03-2016 at 02:44 AM. Reason: Spelling
    UncleLeo and Iwantoff2013 like this.

  30. #30
    LesPaulJeff is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Posts
    37

    Arrow Update

    Well, I relapsed again and took more sub not long after my most recent post. I did good for the day or two after my last post but what triggered the continued use was I had to return to work a couple of days later, and as you more experienced people know and may have suspected....I wasn't ready to go back to work. I went to work and it was pure hell. As I said in my OP, I work in retail so I am walking all day long and I have customers in my face throughout the day...not a good combination for someone who is still in a haze and feeling the effects of suboxone withdrawals. I was worried about then when I first made my plans to get clean again. I was thinking that 8 or 9 days off in a row just wasn't enough time but I was trying to stay positive...but it didn't work. I refuse to continue to be an addict and scrap my plans for detox, so....

    I went to my employer and told them the honest truth. They were very understanding and overly nice. They told me that my job is protected under the FMLA and I can take a leave of absence and my job will be waiting on me when I get back. Such good news!!! So, I'm taking 2-3 months off work and starting my detox over again beginning tomorrow.

    Since I was dishing out the honesty left and right, I went to my doctor this morning and told him what's going on with me. He said that you would be surprised how many people in the medical field is a recovering addict, so he totally understood. He gave me a Rx for Neurontin and Metoprolol. I'm excited about the Meto b/c it will stop the chest discomfort associated with w/ds that I have been complaining about in previous posts. He also refilled my Lunesta and K-pin so I can continue to get good sleep. Those meds are perfect for the insomnia due to w/d's. Even when I was on day 9 I never got less than 8 hours of sleep. A few years ago when I went through this I barely got 4 hours of sleep at a time until day 12 or so.

    Anyways, tomorrow 9/9 I'm giving it another go, without the pressures of work. So my main problem will be fighting cravings and the boredom of not being happy about anything for a bit, which is ok by me...it could be much worse. I'm very happy I decided to be honest with my job and my Dr. I'm also aware that I am very lucky that my job was cool with this and with being able to take off work and be ok. I have massive respect for anyone who has successfully withdrawn and recovered while still going to work every day.

    Wish me luck. I appreciate all of you who have read this and posted to help me. Your support is invaluable. I'll be updating soon for those who care.


    LesPaulJeff
    Last edited by Anonymous; 09-08-2016 at 01:35 PM. Reason: Spelling and grammar

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